


boyfriend ♡

by ladyofshallott



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Artist Keith (Voltron), Best Friends to Lovers, Bisexual Allura (Voltron), Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Fluff, Friends With Benefits, Friends to Lovers, Gay Keith (Voltron), Idiots in Love, Implied Sexual Content, Inspired by Music, Japanese Korean Keith (Voltron), Jealous Keith (Voltron), Jealous Lance (Voltron), Jock Lance (Voltron), Keith & Shiro (Voltron) are Cousins, Keith is too pretty, Keith/Lance (Voltron) Angst, Kinda, Korean Keith (Voltron), Lesbian Romelle (Voltron), M/M, Minor Allura/Lance (Voltron), Minor James Griffin/Keith (Voltron), Mutual Pining, Oblivious Lance (Voltron), POV Alternating, Pining Keith (Voltron), Pining Lance (Voltron), Texan Keith (Voltron), basketball player lance, he still in the closet :(, i live for jelly lance yall dont know, im projecting my thirst for keith onto every possible character esp lance so what, kinda in the future tho, klance still endgame tho dw i gotchu, listen it's complicated, me : HOW AB ALL, no smut tho im still insecure ab writing it :/, some of yall : either make keith korean texan or japanese, we need more fics of lance playing basketball, yes im cliche mind yo business, you'll see - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-15
Updated: 2020-11-16
Packaged: 2021-02-01 07:49:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 135,274
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21445864
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ladyofshallott/pseuds/ladyofshallott
Summary: A sudden laughter erupted on the table and without looking up, Keith already knew who it was. If not by the way his insides warmed up, then for the laughter by itself. That laughter that made you instantly happy just by hearing it, that kind of laughter that made you join in without even knowing what the joke was about. The black haired knew that if he looked up he’d be attacked because of the pure bliss on Lance’s face.Keith stared at him enough to know how it looked like.♡Inspired by Ariana Grande's 'boyfriend' of when two people want to be together, but somehow aren't.
Relationships: Adam/Shiro (Voltron), Keith/Lance (Voltron)
Comments: 117
Kudos: 378





	1. play date

**Author's Note:**

> hi guys! so this is just a piece i've been planning and writing for a long time and i'm relieved i can finally share it. i hope u like it and expect an update soon if u liked it!
> 
> this fic is inspired by ariana grande's 'boyfriend'. i just took the concept of two people wanting to be together, but cant because they're afraid of commitment or in Keith and Lance's case - afraid of the person you love not liking you back. basic concept, but im only human and high school and friends with benefits are my fav aus so ...
> 
> also idk shit ab american school systems and periods so just pretend the shit I wrote makes sense
> 
> anyways, thanks for clicking on my piece and i hope i dont dissapoint u guys.  
Enjoy! <3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN UPDATE! I edited some stuff in the whole story so that's why people who have already read my story will be a bit confused! Sorry babes <3

_“ I’m a motherfuckin’ train wreck_

_I don’t wanna be too much_

_But I don’t wanna miss your touch_

_And you don’t seem to give a fuck . “_

“Lance- _hah-_… the fucking broom is hurting my back, you gotta-,” Keith let out a _really_ embarrassing moan when Lance grabbed his thighs and hoisted him up. While he was moving him to the other wall, his mouth played with his earring and tugged it playfully. He smirked when Keith released a whimper. Jocks.

When Keith decided to spend his half lunch break, making out with the basketball star Lance Ramirez in a storage room, he didn’t expect it to be so painful.

“You literally go to the fitness almost every day, then on the next day you go on kickbox practices with Shiro and now you’re complaining about some broom nudging your back? You never fail to surprise me, Kogane.”

When Keith’s back finally hit the other wall, he attacked Lance's lips again with a quick ‘shut up’. Keith always loved it when he was kissing Lance. It felt so right, the way their bodies and lips fit so well like pieces from a puzzle. Lance’s hands moved slightly ‘till they reached his butt and he gave it a squeeze. Keith moaned. Again.

The bell that announced one hour left ‘till the beginning of the second period ringed, but neither of the boys paid it mind. After all, they were used to it by now.

Keith pushed his hips towards Lance’s hard boner sporting his jeans. Now it was Lance, who let out a pretty whine.

“You can,” another hard kiss, their tongues touching each other and making Keith shiver. The black haired boy’s hands moved towards Lance’s brown locks and tugged hard just like Lance liked it. Lance smelled so good and his muscles were so strong and Keith wanted to die. He tugged again and the tall boy finally broke the kiss and bared his neck.

“I can what?” Lance asked while Keith attacked his collarbone already sucking in, creating hickeys, that could be covered with Lance’s jacket easily. Keith ignored that possessive side of his that wanted everyone to see that the lover boy of Voltron High had someone by his side.

_He’s not yours though._

He reminded himself again. That thought has been running through his mind, since he and Lance started this… arrangement between themselves. If that’s what you can call it. They haven’t had sex, just some sloppy making out, hand and blow jobs. Both of them weren’t exactly ready to sleep together yet. Although Keith wouldn’t say he was opposed to the idea…

“You can put me down now, I already know you have muscles Ramirez,” sadly he pulled his mouth away from Lance’s pretty warm and dark skin so he could answer the boy in front of him, “you don’t need to impress me.”

When he finally looked at Lance’s face, he felt a blush already taking over. Lance was looking at him with such hunger, as if he hadn’t hear what Keith said and didn’t care one bit, just wanted to keep making out.

Lance smirked, but put him down carefully. Which was bummer since he was slightly shorter than Lance and couldn’t look him eye to eye anymore, unless Lance slightly tilted his head down. His hands stayed on his ass and gave it another squeeze.

“Let me feel strong for a moment jeez. We both know you’re more muscular and can throw me across the room if you wanted. Which is really sexy might I add-,“ he dived in for another kiss and Keith almost gave in, but he put his hand on Lance’s mouth right now time. The pale boy knew if they kissed, they wouldn’t stop after some time. And they had to take care of their tents really fast and go to eat their lunch. Pidge, Hunk, Allura and Romelle were probably getting suspicious.

Lance’s protest died on his mouth, when Keith removed his hand and slid on his knees, right in front of Lance’s crotch.

The brunette already was putting both his hands in Keith’s hair.

“God, Keith you’re going to kill me one day,” Lance moaned as Keith started undoing his pants.

‘_Well you already killed me_’ was Keith’s last thought before he was about drive Lance insane with pleasure once again.

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Keith thought back to the moment where this thing with Lance started. It was maybe two or three months ago and Keith was picking up Lance from practice after he finished his homework at Coran’s art cabinet. Since the Ramirez and Shirogane-Williams houses were really close, the two boys were used to go and leave school together. It was the best part of Keith’s day since he was usually using his hover-bike to drive them home and Lance had to put his hands around his waist and his head on Keith’s shoulder and his pining gay ass really loved it.

As he entered the sport hall, he was greeted with Lance sweaty in a tank top, that didn’t leave much to the imagination, dribbling alone, practicing past due like always. Lance always felt like he had to be the best even if he knew he was the star of his team and already with a scholarship.

Of course, Keith just watched without announcing his arrival and kept checking out his best friend. After some good minutes, Lance finally decided to stop and as he turned around, Keith’s breath caught up in his throat and he almost choked. Lance’s eyes were serious and determined, a really unusual look on his handsome face that was smiling or smirking most of the time.

_Oh no, he’s hot…_

Lance’s hair was sticking on his sweaty forehead, curly due to heat. Lance always complained about it, claiming that the curls looked awful, but honestly, Keith thought he looked even more attractive. Not trusting his mouth to say something _not _embarrassing, Keith simply waved and tilted his head at the clock on the wall that showed it was already 6pm and they had to leave. Lance’s eyebrows furrowed and followed his motion. When he saw the hour, the boy simply sighed and headed to his bottle of water. Keith couldn’t help but track the sweat that was falling down from his temple, and how his Adam apple bobbed when he was chugging down the drink. Is this some wet dream of his? Did Keith have to pinch himself to wake up?

“Hey mullet.”

Nope, this was definitely real. In Keith’s fantasies Lance was using these gross pet names, not ‘mullet’ or ‘asshole’. Not that Keith was thinking about Lance. Not at all.

Finally trusting his ability to talk, Keith rolled his eyes and started walking towards the taller.

“You’ve gotten better.” Keith complimented him, because he genuinely wanted to let the Cuban know his abilities have gone up since he started playing for the school team. Keith knew he needed some encouragement once in a while. The black haired knew what was underneath that cocky and arrogant façade after all.

As usual, however, Lance dismissed him and waved a hand.

“It still needs to be better. The games are after a month and we’re against the Olkari,” the brunette grabbed his red towel and started drying himself, while putting his bottle in his bag, “and they’re tough motherfuckers.”

“I know, but I don’t get why you’re overworking yourself,” Lance put on a sweatshirt, since it was really cold outside and hiked his backpack on his shoulder. Towel now hanging from his neck, he motioned to Keith to finally go, “you already got accepted into Altea AND with a scholarship. Do you think they’re going to cancel you just because you lost to some school game?” Keith let out a scoff.

As they got the doors, Keith switched off the lights and the hall went into complete darkness, the only light now coming from the hall. Lance chuckled and opened the doors, but held it for Keith like the gentleman Luna Carillo raised him to be. Even from such a small gesture, Keith flushed a bit nevertheless. People often mistook Lance’s character, just because he was flirty and arrogant, always joking around. Lance was actually one of the nicest and kindest people he’s ever met, right next to Hunk and his cousin, who was more of a brother to Keith – Shiro.

“Look who’s talking. As if you didn’t faint two weeks ago, because you forgot to eat and drink, all for finishing your art piece. Don’t even dare to talk about overworking in front of me, Kogane.”

Keith scowled. “When will you finally forget about this? It literally happened for the first time and I won’t do it again. I promised, didn’t I?”

When Keith looked at Lance, he was surprised by the angry frown on his face.

When the brunette didn’t respond and just kept walking, Keith just let it be. It’s not like he did faint on purpose. Unlike Lance, Keith had to do other stuff if he wanted to get accepted into Altea too. And he really wanted to.

They didn’t talk for the rest of the walk. Lance greeted the doorman bye and they headed towards Keith’s bike. They were both still silent as Keith gave him the spare helmet. Still silent as Keith parked in front of Lance’s house. As Keith got up from his seat so he and Lance can put their helmets under it, the tension between them was getting higher and higher. Since Keith lived just a few houses down, he always left his bike at Lance’s because there was no use to drive it from his house to here just to pick Lance up. It was easier.

Lance opened the garage door, a neutral look on his face. Keith was getting worried with every second passing by. Their departure was supposed to be banter and teasing, talking about how the second period went and then to hug for a good night. Maybe sometime he’d stay for dinner or Lance will come to his house. This silence wasn’t them.

Keith thought about apologizing, but then again. For what? He didn’t do anything wrong and he was stubborn. If Lance wasn’t doing no effort to say something, then Keith sure as hell wasn’t going to either.

Keith placed his bike next to Luna’s car and left. Keith saw Lance typing the code for closing the garage door, and turned on his feet to go home, sure that Lance wasn’t going to say anything for the rest of the night. He walked for some seconds before he heard a voice behind him.

“What now Keith? You won’t even say good night?”

The tone wasn’t even Lance’s typical teasing one. It was bitter and mad as if he wanted to get a rise of Keith. And guess what? He was going to get it.

Keith turned around and faced his friend who had his arms crossed, leaning on the pillar of the house. He still had that neutral look on his face, but his dark blue eyes were giving away his anger. Irritated Keith marched at him and when he finally stood in front of Lance and looked up slightly to meet his eyes, the realization hit him like a train. He was really about to have a fight with Lance, one of the closest people in his life. Adrenaline pulsed everywhere in his body. He has gotten better with his anger since freshman year, but that didn’t mean the hot-headedness wasn’t a part of his personality anymore.

“What’s your fucking problem?! If something happened and you haven’t told me or don’t plan to tell me, go talk with someone or whatever. I don’t care. But don’t let it out on me. I’m not a punching bag for your problems, Lance.”

He lied. Of course he cared, if something happened, but he didn’t deserve his attitude. Not when he wasn’t at fault. Crush or not, Keith had enough dignity and self respect.

For a second, Lance’s eyes softened a bit. It was barely visible, but Keith has known him for four years now and had a good (if not perfect) knowledge about Lance’s expressions. The softness was there, but then disappeared as if it wasn’t there and the anger was back again, showing in those pretty blue eyes.

Lance still kept it quiet, staring as if analyzing Keith. Keith almost groaned in annoyance. What did that guy want?!

A wave of wind blew and Keith shivered. It was the middle of December so the wind was quite cold and Keith was only in his hoodie with nothing underneath. Lance, the fucker, of course noticed and the anger was replaced with worry. As if Lance was really about to make him stay in front of his house to look at each other like some idiots.

Keith counted to ten and just when he was about to flip him off and go home, Lance murmured something.

“What?”

Another cold wave and Keith put his arms around himself. Keith huffed angrily.

“Lance just spit it o-“

“I think we should kiss.”

And just like that time froze. Lance’s whole face was red and it was probably a mix of the cold and embarrassment. Keith was sure his face wasn’t doing any better and was sporting an even more visible blush since his skin was pale in contrast with Lance’s light brown one.

“Lance wh-“

“Ugh this came out so wrong! Look I didn’t mean it in that way! I just… I just lately think about boys more than usual and you’re gay so you probably know more about this than me. And I was just thinking if you could,” Lance took a breath and the warmth hit Keith in the face gently,”… you know… help a… bro out?”

Lance grimaced as if the words physically hurt him to say. Keith could hear the Ramirez family talking loud even from outside.

“You want us to kiss each other, so you could decide if you’re into guys?”

Lance looked ready to go into his house, hide under his bed and never come out.

“I- I- uhh…,” Lance gulped, “I mean I’ve liked girls all my life, but I- um I always knew I didn’t look or thought about boys in the most heterosexual way, you know?” he looked around, looking like he wanted to be saved from having this conversation.

“I guess I’ve been bi-curious for a long time now and since it’s our last year of high school I thought to myself ‘what more could I lose?’ and since you’re my closest friend, gay and you know…” this time he looked straight at Keith and Keith almost melted, “you’re not exactly bad in the face so I decided to ask you. I’d understand if you refused, but man I would really appre-“

Not bad in the face? Did Lance find him attractive all this time? Keith’s stomach warmed at the thought.

“Sure.”

Keith’s answer came out and stopped Lance’s rambling who looked so shocked as if he was preparing a whole speech to convince Keith. The Korean almost rolled his eyes. If Lance thought it would take a whole speech to make him want to smooch the brunet, he had news coming his way.

“Wait really?”

Keith huffed and saw his cold breath coming out, forming in the air.

“Yes, Lance, really. Is that why you got so mad? You wanted to ask me if I want to kiss you?”

“I got mad, because you waved off your fainting which scared the shit out of me. But yeah that’s also a part of it.”

This time Keith rolled his eyes.

“Whatever. We were talking about smooching.”

“Please never say that word again.” Lance begged.

“You’re avoiding the question.”

“Is that my mom calling me?”

“Lance.”

“Keith.”

Keith uncurled his hands that were around him warming him and put them on Lance’s shoulders. Lance’s eyes widened comically. Lance was warm. He smelled of sweat, Lance and the deodorant he was using. He was in a need for a shower, but it wasn’t really that bad. Keith has kissed boys who smelled even worse. If that was the only time he was going to kiss his crush then so be it. Keith wasn’t going to complain. He’d make the most of it.

“Look,” he leveled Lance with an intense stare and Lance, if it was possible, got even redder. Oh god, this was going to be fun. The famous flirty Lover boy blushing like he’s going to kiss for the first time. Adorable. “You just want to test a theory. You will either enjoy it or won’t like it. Both versions are okay. And if you enjoy and it turns out that your hypothesis is true and you do like guys,” Keith shrugged, “It won’t be a big deal. You’re still the same Lance no matter your sexuality. Okay?”

Lance nodded. Keith wet his lips and saw how Lance’s gaze tracked the movement. The shorter boy almost whined. Almost.

However…

“Lance you’re tense. Just calm down. I don’t think kissing a boy or a girl is really that different. Don’t be so scared.”

He brought his hands up and touched Lance’s hot cheeks. Lance immediately relaxed under his touch and Keith was really gonna scream.

Keith thought that Lance might need more preparation, when all of a sudden Lance tilted his head down a bit and touched their lips.

The black haired always thought about kissing Lance since he realized about his crush on him.

_And wow._

None of these imaginations compared to the real thing. Lance’s lips were soft and slightly chapped because of the wind. For a moment, both of them were just sitting there, not moving. And as if on time, they both started actually kissing. The boys opened their mouths and tilted their heads so they can kiss properly. Lance placed his hands on Keith’s hips, while Keith just smeared his thumbs across Lance’s cheekbones. The moment their tongues touched, it was all game over. Keith became greedier with every kiss, with every touch, he almost forgot he was doing this for Lance. The pauses between the kisses were getting shorter and shorter. Keith couldn’t get enough and apparently so did Lance, which caused Keith’s heart to make a happy flip in his chest and for the butterflies in his stomach to erupt. The air was getting colder, but Keith didn’t care as he basked in Lance’s warm body.

Of course all good things had to come to an end. Keith’s stomach let out a loud growl and he suddenly remembered he didn’t eat his lunch today. Keith separated their lips, which made a ‘smack’ sound. It was hilariously cute how Lance chased after him. Another thump in Keith’s chest.

Keith let out a happy sigh. Lance’s eyes were still closed, but there was a tiny small gracing his lips. Those lips that actually kissed Keith. And Keith kissed back. He wanted more, he wanted to press his mouth against his again and never stop.

When Lance opened his eyes and looked at Keith, Keith didn’t know why, but he felt scared. What would Lance say now? Did he find out that Keith was helplessly in love with him by just the kiss? God, what if Keith was too eager or desperate and now Lance would hate him and- shit- Keith fucked up-

The black haired boy dropped his hands and tried to take a step back, but Lance’s arms around his waist tightened and Keith looked up to see Lance’s eyes who had his eyebrows furrowed.

Oh shit, Keith thought, I’m gonna have to move to Canada now and never come back.

“Can I kiss you again?”

What.

“What?” Keith asked in disbelief.

Lance’s eyes tracked his face, looked around them, but that little smile showed up again. One of his hands left Keith’s hips so he could reach behind his neck all embarrassed and shy. He was so cute and Keith’s heart couldn’t take it.

“I just um-… I just think I can’t decide if I like boys from just one kiss? Another one would definitely help. If that’s okay with you, I mean. I know you’re probably hungry-“

Keith didn’t need any other explanations. If Lance wanted to kiss him, well… he wasn’t really going to say no.

And as Keith grabbed the front of Lance’s shirt and pulled him into another kiss, he thought of how this was the best and yet the worst decision of his life.

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

And here he was. Two months already and they were still kissing whenever they wanted, making each other feel good. Keith knew he was taking a certain advantage of the situation, but could anyone blame him? His crush liked making out him! Him! Keith Kogane! Lance could literally have anyone else in this school, but no. He wanted to kiss Keith.

This past week, however, Keith has been thinking about breaking things off. Yes, he liked Lance. Yes, he wanted to keep this arrangement and stretch it out as long as he can. He knew that Lance would eventually get tired of him or find someone else and Keith would probably smile and play it off, but deep down his heart would forever bleed and ache for the person he most desired, yet he couldn’t have.

It wasn’t only that. It was almost the beginning of February and Keith had to submit some required art pieces. Keith was an artist and he knew he wanted to do that for the rest of his life. He loved the feeling of expressing himself through a brush, or a pen. Since he was mostly shitty with words and he struggled with actions, painting and creating art was the only way Keith could show everything he wanted and be one hundred percent real.

And Altea University of Sports, Art and IT was really hard to get in. Altea was a dream come true for everyone who wanted those three main specialties. After graduation, they immediately find you a job so you could put into work all the things you’ve learned. The sport students could play in teams while they were studying. The art and IT students were put into part time jobs, so they could have experience. Lance already won a scholarship for it so he was safe. Pidge was still an year younger but she'd said to Keith that she didn't worry about it. She was confident in her skills and that's what of the many things Keith admired about her. He knew Pidge would get in. Which left Keith, Hunk and Allura. Technically Allura’s father was one of the professors at the place so he could easily put his daughter in the list, if he wanted, but he knew none of that would happen. Allura was hardworking so she definitely wanted to actually get through her exams and pass. Keith didn’t really know many rich boys or girls, only the stereotypes around them and he knew Allura didn’t fit them at all.

Allura was a dancer and captain of the gymnastic team. There wasn’t something Allura couldn’t to. Everyone loved Allura. She worked hard and didn’t take shit from anyone.

She was also desired from both, boys and girls. Allura was bisexual so she could have the best of the both worlds. However, Voltron’s best girl thought that dating right now could distract her from her goal so she never responded to the invitations that were offered. Dates or prom suggestions (already?) were all off the table. Keith really admired her resistance. After all, a lot of attractive people studied here. Not that Keith was the best judge for that since he was a full raging homosexual.

Like Keith and Allura, Hunk Garett was still someone from their group who still didn’t get accepted into an university. He submitted for Altea and Balmera and while most of them wanted into the first one, Keith had doubts that Hunk’s wish to study in Balmera was stronger. They had an excellent engineer program and students there could take hobbies two days in the week and the Samoan probably wanted to take cooking classes so he could improve at it. In Keith’s opinion, there was no need since Hunk’s skills were perfect, but oh well…

Also, his freshman girlfriend Shay studied there too so.

Which left the only art student in the group aka Keith. He already submitted some pieces, but there was still work to do and Lance was so…so distracting.

Keith wanted to be able to do everything perfectly.

His thoughts got interrupted when a pale hand waved in front of his eyes. He immediately recognized the freckles on it and looked on his right to see Pidge. Her light auburn eyes full of worry and amusement.

“Dude are you with us? I’ve been calling your name for a fifth time now yet no answer,” she nudged his shoulder gently, “what’s going on?”

Honestly if it wasn’t for Pidge, Keith was pretty sure his list of friends would consist only of his art materials, Shiro, Adam and his dog Kosmo. They met through Pidge’s older brother Matt who also studied here and was Lance’s teammate in the basketball team. Matt and him had a group project back in freshman year and when he came over at the Holts, he met with Pidge and after some awkwardness, they both bonded over conspiracy theories and their weird, not-so-social personalities. They hung out only when Keith was coming over, but after Pidge found out she’d study in the same high school, they started meeting up occasionally without her brother. They did their homework together, they vented to each other and watched alien documentaries together. And although Lance was the first person he'd actually talked to first, through Pidge he actually got to know Lance and Hunk and so on. She was his first best friend and he wouldn’t trade her for the world.

“Sorry, I’ve been zoning out lately. You know uni stress and all that shit.”

He leaned forward on the table and put forearms on it.

A small hand landed on his shoulder.

“Stop worrying over that, Keith. I’m sure you’ll get in, you’re super talented and you’ve been drawing since you were a kid,” she whispered gently as she started rubbing her hand on his shoulder up and down in a comforting manner, “you had a lot of time to improve and you did. There’s no doubt in my mind that they won’t accept a gem like you.”

Keith started fiddling with his hands and threw her a quick, thankful smile. Pidge nodded and went back to scrolling on her phone.

A sudden laughter erupted on the table and without looking up, Keith already knew who it was. If not by the way his insides warmed up, then for the laughter by itself. That laughter that made you instantly happy just by hearing it, that kind of laughter that made you join in without even knowing what the joke was about. The black haired knew that if he looked up he’d be attacked because of the pure bliss on Lance’s face. Keith stared at him enough to know how it looked like.

Keith put his head in his head and sighed quietly. When will this crush go away? Will it disappear someday? His heart dropped in his stomach in fear. What if he never got over it and he was fifty years old, painting sunsets and dogs, with sea blue eyes and brown skin still running through his mind? _Oh god-_

“Hey Keith who do you think should I choose?”

Keith slightly jumped from the cheerfulness in Romelle’s voice and looked on his left to see her eyes darting around the room, hands casually supporting her cheeks.

“Hm?”

“You know, for the prom? I got three proposals, but I still haven’t decided.”

Keith’s eyebrows raised. So promposals already started? People were fast.

“From whom?”

Romelle looked at him and a sneaky smile creeped on her face.

“First it was Luca.”

“Your ex from two years ago? Didn’t she have a boyfriend now?”

Usually Keith didn’t like to gossip or talk behind people’s backs, but with Romelle it was as if he magically transformed into a old grandma judging people from her window.

Romelle nodded excitingly and turned her whole body towards him. Keith was thankful for the distraction. Otherwise he’d probably get a panic attack over his unbearable crush on the basketball star.

“She did. Apparently they broke up one week ago so she texted me yesterday,” she went to grab her phone, opened it, fiddled for some seconds and then handled it to Keith so he can read the chat.

_ex_

_hello, do you want to accompany me to the prom <3_

uhm, i gotta think ab it :/

_ex_

_ofc, text me when u have the answer rom_

Apparently the cringe must have showed on Keith’s face since Romelle snorted.

“She sounds like a knight from the 17th century asking for your hand in marriage.”

This time the blonde let out a quiet laugh and covered her mouth, her shoulders moving, a twinkle in her eyes.

“I know right! I seriously laughed out loud when I read that and I was on a movie with Lura so imagine.”

Keith supported his head in his hand and started fiddling with his earring, trying not to think how Lance usually played with it, whenever they were alone. The Korean stubbornly kept his eyesight on Romelle, refusing to glance at Lance who was only a few meters away.

“Are you going to say yes though?”

Romelle threw him an ‘are you crazy’ look.

“Of course not, she’s my ex for a reason.”

Keith threw her a smile.

“How would I know, Rom? I only have one ex and he moved away, it’s not like I’m experienced in those stuff.”

“Ew, don’t mention the-one-who-shall-not be named in my presence please,” her face was scrunched in disgust and Keith snickered. He was pretty much over his ex-boyfriend Rolo from years ago and he sometimes forgot he was in a relationship with that cheating asshole. His friends did not however forgot and constantly threw bitter and funny comments regarding him, which never failed to make Keith laugh.

“Anyways, who was the second one?”

Romelle just opened her mouth to answer, but the bell who announced thirty minutes rang and she immediately closed it. He tapped her lightly on the thigh and stood up.

“You’ll tell me in geography, alright? I gotta go to use the bathroom.”

“You better hold on to that, Kogane.”

She lightly tapped his butt, as he turned around to get his backpack. Usually whoever tried to get their hands on that zone would lose their limbs, but that was Romelle and he didn’t mind one bit. The other exception was Lance, but that didn’t count.

Pidge’s gaze left her phone’s screen and asked him if he was going. She nodded after his quiet yes and muttered a ‘see you’. Just as he hunched his backpack over his shoulder and turned around to say bye to everyone else, one pair of arms landed on his shoulders. Keith immediately recognized on who they belonged. He also ignored the speeding up of his heart.

“Hey mullet, why didn’t you tell me we were leaving?”

Keith noticed Lance’s own backpack on his shoulder too and suddenly remembered he had history with Lance.

“Oh sorry, I forgot. I wanted to use the bathroom.”

They started walking toward the exit of the cafeteria, Lance’s hand now thrown across his shoulder.

Almost like a couple-

_No. Don’t go in there. Forbidden territory. _

“You’re kind of zoning out these days, man, I’m getting kind of worried,” he chuckled, but the worry was still evident in his voice.

Keith huffed and his voice dropped down an octave and muttered in Lance’s ear, “Don’t worry, Ramirez, I won’t forget how to suck your dick.”

The reaction was exactly one he definitely wanted to see. Lance’s eyes got wide and threw a Keith a scandalous look, his mouth open in shock. He could see a blush spreading on the Lance’s cheeks and felt satisfied. Keith didn’t usually flirt or acknowledged the friends with benefits situation they were in, so whenever he did, it always left Lance a sputtering mess.

“Keith, dude-,“ he shook his head and looked ahead. The raven-haired also noticed the red that was coloring his ears.

He kind of wanted to lean forward and bite it. It was one of Lance’s sensitive spots and Keith prided himself of the way he found it so easily.

Unintentionally he was just about to do it, when Lance stopped in his tracks. Keith was about to ask when he eyes found the WC sign.

“Okay, I’m gonna be ready in a-… what are you… doing?” Keith narrowed his eyes when Lance’s hand didn’t leave his shoulder and was about to enter the bathroom with him.

The look of fake innocence on Lance’s face could’ve been comical if it wasn’t for Keith knowing damn well what Lance had in mind. And- and usually Keith would’ve been happy or satisfied that Lance wanted to spend those remaining ten minutes with him, them making out in one of the bathroom cabins. But lately Keith just always has that wave of realization that Lance doesn’t want to kiss and make Keith feel good, just because of Keith alone… but because of his body or maybe the fact that he was a boy. And it’s not like Keith didn’t want it. When he or Lance weren’t in the mood, they made sure to tell each other so they won’t be any non-consensual stuff happening that could damage their relationship. Of course, Keith wanted to kiss Lance, and run his fingers through his chestnut locks and have Lance’s hand on his shoulder. He just wished the circumstances were different. He wanted Lance to want him for _him_.

He didn’t blame Lance though. There was only himself to blame. He got himself in this sticky situation and he was going to get out of it. The sooner the better.

Keith grabbed Lance’s hand and put it away from his body. Lance immediately frowned.

“Lance, not now, I’m not in the mood.”

Lance was silent, his eyes roaming looking for something probably. Keith thought he didn’t find anything apparently since the frown became even bigger. The black haired wanted to reach out and smooth the worry line between his eyebrows. That look didn’t look good on Lance. He preferred a happy, smiley Lance over this any day.

“Did something happen? You were fine earlier, is it something I did?”

“No. Lance, it’s not you, I would’ve told you, you know that. Stop thinking you’re in the wrong whenever I’m not feeling it, alright?”

Keith’s voice was soft. He didn’t Lance to blame himself over something stupid as Keith being a selfish prick, wanting more than he already got.

“And I would love to continue this conversation,”

_he definitely wouldn’t_,

“but I really gotta pee.”

Lance huffed, but there was now a smile on his handsome face.

“Your buddle is so small. After one sip of water and you’re already peeing the whole Pacific ocean.”

Bickering. Okay something normal. Keith could handle this.

“Don’t bring my tiny buddle into this, Ramirez,” he lifted up an accusing finger at Lance as he finally made his way to the door for the male bathroom.

Lance only rolled his eyes and leaned against the wall while he crossed his arms.

After his relieve, he went to clean his hands and looked at his reflection in the dirty mirror. A boy next to him was taking mirror selfies and apparently was feeling himself since that click sound wasn’t stopping.

Keith washed and dried his hands and tied his hair into a ponytail, making his long earing more visible. He took his red shirt and tied it around his waist, now his long sleeved V-neck shirt showing off his arms nicely. Keith didn’t find himself super attractive, but he was proud of having a good body so Lance wasn’t always going to be the one showing off goddammit!

Keith finally left the bathroom (and the boy) and made his way towards the Cuban.

Who wasn’t alone. Huh.

Lance was talking with a boy, who was obviously a freshman, judging by how young he looked and the uniform only the first year students wore. The brown skinned boy had a neutral look on his face, but his pose was kind of defensive. Lance was usually a joker, but when he wanted to look scary he could totally pull it off. He raised one eyebrow, after the freshman said something and when he noticed Keith, he so subtly (read not at all) checked him out. Something warm twitched and Keith scolded himself. This was not a time to pop a boner, just because his crush checked him out! How old was he? Fifteen? Sheesh.

Speaking of… the freshman speaking to Lance turned around and his eyes widened, almost popped out of their place at the sight of Keith. He almost groaned. One time he shows off his muscular arms and people will think he will beat them up. Nice. As he got closer he heard Lance’s finishing sentence.

“-ally ask him if you want.”

The boy’s cheeks got red.

“What’s going on here?” He tried to sound neutral, maybe even nice, but Lance’s face that wasn’t exactly friendly, put him on the edge. The brunet in general was kind and non-judgmental towards the students of all ages. Having a lot of siblings helped him with that.

The freshman avoided Keith’s gaze. Okay scratch that, the poor boy probably thought he was gonna punch him in the face for just talking to them. Which was stupid.

“This little fella here wanted to ask you something,” Lance looked at him sideways and nodded at the smaller teenager in front of them who was pointedly looking at the floor, “he noticed us hanging out a lot and wanted to know some stuff.”

Keith frowned. Lance didn’t act like this. He was rarely angry, unlike Keith. Something was wrong and the Korean didn’t like it.

Keith put on a smile, pitying the younger because of Lance’s shitty attitude.

“Hey, what’s your name? You can ask me, I won’t bite. Don’t mind Lance here acting like a stick in the mud.”

When Lance didn’t say or did anything Keith really got concerned, but tried no to show it, keeping the smile on his face. What the fuck was going on?

The boy hesitantly brought up his gaze and when he met Keith’s one, his cheeks reddened even more. Confusion erupted in the pale’s boy mind. He still failed to understand what was going on.

The bell for the remaining ten minutes rang and the boy jumped, obviously startled. Keith tried not to snort, but he failed. The look of horror spread on the boy’s face, but when he noticed that Keith wasn’t mocking him, he let out a smile of his own.

Okay, we’re getting there.

The teenager cleared his throat and fiddled with his hands.

“Um… my name is Daishi and well- I was wondering if I could ask you a question… um Keith right?”

Keith nodded and asked the nervous freshman. “You have a Japanese name, right?” When Daishi confirmed, Keith’s smile got wider. “That’s cool. My brother, Takashi, is from Japan too. Everyone calls him Shiro though.”

The boy tilted his head. “White? Wait ... Takashi Shirogane is your brother?!”

“Kinds. You see how he has this white streak in his hair. He apparently dyed it back in college, because he thought it looked good, but I’ve been joking him that it’s because of old age.”

Daishi let out a snicker and his tensed shoulders dropped. For a second Keith forgot about Lance next to him, until said boy cleared his throat. Keith looked at him questioningly and Lance jiggled his phone screen showing him that there was no time for chit chat.

“Ahh yes, sorry you guys gotta go probably-“

“No don’t worry about it. Ask away. If Lance here wanted to leave so badly,” he threw said boy a pointed look, “he probably would.”

However the taller boy remained stubborn and his only action was to cross his arms.

Keith brought his attention back on Daishi and was low-key surprised of the confidence that was barely visible in his eyes.

“I- I uh well since prom is coming soon I was wondering if you know… you could be my date? Which I know that it sounds really crazy since you’re really old and stuff,” his face grimaced in a panic, “NOT that you’re that old, you’re just barely four years older than me and isn’t going to be a big deal! I hope…”

“And! You’re not pressured to say yes I’m just laying you an option, but I highly doubt you don’t have a date since you’re really pretty and strong and cute- and God why cantishutthefuckup-…” Daishi visibly grimaced as if the words spilling from his mouth were hurting him physically. And his cheeks were so red, that if Keith didn’t know the reason of it he’d probably assume the boy was running a fever.

“So yes, um, Keith would you be my date to the prom?”

And to be honest, Keith felt really flattered. Of course, he wasn’t going to say yes, because for a lot of reasons, but the gesture was so sweet? This boy was clearly here first year, he was unfamiliar with a lot of stuff and still had the courage to ask out a senior eye to eye? If Daishi was older or if Keith was younger, he’d definitely consider the proposal and be more flustered than he was now.

However he had to break it out nicely for him. By the looks of it, the young teen already knew he was going to get a rejection. But Keith had to let it him know, to see- how amazing this boy and how many other boys (and girls?) were going to be lucky to have him as a boyfriend.

He started it off with putting a hand on his shoulder in the typical comforting-like-Shiro manner and when Daishi didn’t shy, tensed or pulled away Keith took it as a go.

“Look, that was absolutely sweet and amazing and I really appreciate and admire your courage and confidence. Honestly freshman Keith would be really smitten with you,” Daishi smiled a bit and Keith continued, “and for all these four years I’ve been here in this school, no one has ever asked me to prom. Not even my ex boyfriend.”

Keith chuckled a bit at the disbelief showed on the face of the Japanese boy.

“And I’m gonna have to say no, but don’t let that bring you down. People come and go and soon you’ll find someone amazing and forget about me. Just so you know, that whoever you get to take to prom, they’re going to be really, really lucky.”

Daishi stared at him.

“Can I- can I hug you then? A quick one? You don’t have to say yes but-“

Keith quickly squished the shorter boy’s face in his chest and ruffled his hair just like Shiro does. Keith then patted him on the shoulder, Daishi let out a quiet ‘thank you’ with a smile and waved at Keith as he headed to class probably.

Just now, Keith realized how much Daishi reminded him of Lance.

Speaking of Lance, Keith kind of forgot about him. Which was a real shocker, since he rarely forgot about the his presence whenever he was around him. And as the black haired turned around and expected a pissed off Lance, he was greeted up with a thoughtful, somehow a distant look on the boy’s face.

The bell rang, which meant that the class was starting soon. Both boys shared a panicked look and hurried down the hall. And as they were walking fast (running) Keith finally decided it was time for this arrangement to end.

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

“-and that’s why, it’s important to remember that the landing on the moon in 1969 was the key moment of USA winning the space race.”

_Yeah right, we totally went on the moon_, Keith thought bitterly.

To be completely honest, Keith actually liked history a bit, but today was a day where he was completely distracted by everything and jumpy and hyper active and the reason was probably the coffee he consumed so much. It wasn’t a good habit, per se, but the incoming months promised stressful days, full of exams and submissions for Altea.

His fingers kept hitting his desk repeatedly, while his leg was bouncing underneath. He was staring out the window, watching the winter rain pouring softly and hitting the glass in a soothing manner. He wondered how he could break the arrangement with Lance. It definitely had to be broken up soon and he had to tell him eye to an eye. He owed Lance that at least.

But how? After basketball practice perhaps? Or the next time when Lance goes for it and Keith just straight up tells him?

_‘Yeah dude I actually don’t wanna keep making out with you, ‘cause I’m super in love with you if you haven’t noticed by now and you’re distracting me with your ocean eyes and smooth skin and soft hair and blinding smiles and-…’_

Yeah, not happening.

A piece of paper hit his head which startled Keith and he turned around on his right to see Lance who was taking notes, but judging by the slight grin on his face, this was definitely his doing.

As quiet as Keith could, he unfolded the paper and read the message.

Fuck, even his writing was cute.

**since when did u start catching freshmen like pokemons man ?**

Keith rolled his eyes and turned his gaze towards Lance, but he was pointedly watching Iverson and apparently expected an answer on the paper.

The Korean sighed loudly enough for Lance to hear his annoyance and took his pen as he scribbled down ‘**are you jealous**’ under Lance’s handwriting. He gently folded the little piece and stealthy threw it right in front of his crush’s face, when he made sure the teacher wasn’t looking. He smirked smugly at his right aim.

After a while his mind wandered off again, caught up in the teacher and all the notes he missed from the board when he wasn’t paying attention. He almost forgot about the boy’s response next to him, when a similar ball of white fell on his own work tablet. The dark haired snuck a glance at Iverson who was reading some kind of text out loud and unfolded the little paper.

**why would I be ? I got like 2 promposals yesterday and if u think im jelaous of that kid, unlike him, i actually can kiss u and take u to prom if i wanted to ;) **

Keith felt his cheeks heating up because of the true statement. While Keith acted annoyed with Lance 90% of the time, they both knew if Lance asked him out on prom, Keith would agree. Of course he wasn’t going to write that. And Lance in a million years wouldn’t ask him out.

He wrote with his red pen ‘**I think it’s cute you actually think you can make me go to prom. speaking of, I want to talk to you ab something later, if its ok with you?**’.

The black haired took a deep breath. This was it. This is his chance of getting himself out of this hopeless situation. He was finally doing it.

When Lance received his message he simply threw him thumbs up and then brought up 5 fingers which meant that this was the hour his basketball practice finished. Keith nodded, which unfortunately didn’t go unnoticed by the way Iverson’s loud voice exploded in the whole room.

“Kogane! Ramirez! Perhaps you have a topic as interesting as the Cold war since you’re both not paying attention?”

They both turned around towards and muttered quick apologies.

Iverson hummed. “That’s what I thought.”

The rest of the lesson passed quickly, yet Keith help, but notice how the raindrops looked so much like like tears. A new painting, a sketch, formed in his brain. One where he was passing through the park with an umbrella, but instead of being alone and cold, he shared with someone. The figure was warm and tall, holding his hand, saying another dumb joke that would make Keith laugh. Their boots stomping on the ground making splashes every time they stepped.

Keith quickly erased it from his mind as quickly as it came.

He wished he could erase his heartache in the same way.

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

_“ I know we be so complicated_

_But we be so smitten, it’s crazy_

_I can’t have what I want, but neither can you .”_

The sound of shoes making squeak noises on the floor, his fellow teammates panting and Shiro’s steady voice yelling commands were already such familiar sounds to Lance, he is pretty sure he hears them constantly in his dreams.

“Kinkade! Pass!”

Shiro’s voice spread around the hall and Ryan immediately passed to the closest person next to him from his team, which happened to be Lance. He skillfully caught the ball and dribbled across the court while trying to get past the defenses players, which were some newbie sophomores. The kids were good, but Lance has been playing since he was a kid and for four years for Voltron High now.

Basically, what was Lance trying to say was that he was really good.

He saw Matt behind the new kids and Lance knew exactly what to do without the older Holt telling him. Lance crossover dribbled between his legs confusing the sophomores and while they were trying to catch the ball, the older boy saw the opening between the legs. He bounced the ball and when he saw Matt catching it, he let a smug smile taking over his face. Lance jogged over quickly. The light brown haired boy dribbled and passed the ball to Lotor who got surrounded by some junior. He faked throwing the ball at the other direction and when the younger went for it, he turned around before the other boys could react and threw it at Lance and the blue eyed saw his chance. He corrected his stance fast and threw the ball at the basket, which was pretty far away from Lance, but that didn’t bother him, since Lance already knew he’d score. When he saw the familiar orange ball falling through, he grinned. Cheers from his team and quiet disappointed sighs erupted. They called him the Sharpshooter for a reason after all.

Matt came at him for a fist bump, but before he could return it a heavy muscular hand fell on his back that made him stumble a bit and scoff in pain.

“Good shot Lance.” Ryan’s voice called and Lance had to be dramatic.

“Duh,” he puffed his chest, “although the newbies aren’t really much of an opponent. Also dude, easy with the pats, you might knock the breathe of me one day.” He winced for the dramatics and Ryan laughed.

James Griffin jogged over them and apparently heard Lance since he rolled his eyes and laughed a bit. “As if we were really good on our first practices. Also Ryan, he’s right. You don’t know your own strength sometimes.”

“Speak for yourself, Griffin,” he punched James playfully on the shoulder and he felt smug when Griffin actually lost a bit of balance. “You were so tiny back then.”

The brunet scoffed and crossed his arms. “Fuck you Ramirez.”

Matt laughed loudly along with Lotor who had to contribute too.

“Lance is right, though, you were the shortest, James. And you were obviously so angry about it, it was hilarious. Matt’s sister probably towered over you.”

“Now you’re just extravagating!” James yelled in offence and the whole team laughed.

They bantered for some minutes when their coach finally joined. Probably after the pep talk he gave to the newbies, who were now sitting on the floor, drinking water and chatting.

Takashi Shirogane was an actual legend among the basketball world, the sport in general. His team, White lions, was one of the best out there. Because of him, the USA were Olympic and world champions. Shiro was the goat, Shiro was everything every basketball player wanted to be. Unfortunately, one year before the Olympics in Saint Petersburg in 2040, Shiro was involved in a car accident with his fiancé, now husband. Adam was luckier in terms of injuries, he was in coma for less than an year, while Shiro had to have his hand amputated. They gave him a really cool and new Altean prosthetic, fresh from the lab. However, Shiro was forced to quit at 30 which was kind of an early age for retiring as a basketball star. Lance didn’t know how Shiro pulled through, Lance was sure his whole life would fall apart if he couldn’t play basketball in his team anymore. Now Shiro looked happy where he was and Lance was really glad for him. He deserved it. Shiro was that kind of person who got all of your love and admiration without even trying.

“Good game, boys. As usual.” Shiro was typing something on his tablet, a frown on his face. Lance snorted. Shiro was really bad with the new technologies. Keith was always ready to provide with new stories including Shiro and tech as the main characters. The stories always left their lunch table laughing with tears.

Apparently Shiro achieved his goal, since a tiny smile appeared on his face and he locked the tablet. He looked up at his players and patted Lance on the shoulder, but he looked around at all of them each in the eye.

“I’m proud of you guys, only James and Matt are left to receive a place on Altea, which I’m sure you’re going to get.”

He looked at the electronic clock on the wall that showed it was 16:32pm. Only thirty minutes left and while Lance was glad that he would play more, he also felt nervous that Keith wanted to talk with him afterwards. God, if the Korean learned about his crush on him and confronted him about it, Lance was sure he’d die from embarrassment.

Shiro opened his mouth, but before words could come out, his phone started ringing. He furrowed his brows as he pulled out the device and Lance caught a glimpse of a selfie with him and Adam.

“Uh boys, Adam is calling me, may I-,” he gestured towards the door, but everyone dismissed him with ‘yeah’s and ‘sure’s. Shiro accepted the call as he hurried down to the exit, but he yelled over his shoulder.

“Practice some dribbles and passes with the younglings!”

Lance sighed. Bummer. He was thirsty so he went to his backpack to drink some water. He stayed there to breathe for a bit, to calm down. He wiped his sweaty face with the bottom of his tank top and he made his way towards the younger students and his teammates who were now getting started, when the door opened. Lance assumed this was Shiro so he didn’t pay it mind and kept walking. However, when one of the juniors wolf whistled quietly, but loud enough Lance furrowed his brows and turned around. _What the fuck-_

And of course there was standing no other, but Keith Kogane in all of his god-like sexiness. The red checkered shirt that was tied around his waist was gone, leaving Lance gawking at his legs that were oh so nicely covered in the skinny black ripped jeans. Those were also the jeans that made his ass pop out greatly and made Lance walk behind him on purpose most of the time just to check him out.

Keith’s hair was still up, but there were some strands that escaped and fell into his eyes and Lance wanted to go there, grab his face, kiss him so hard and tuck some of the hair behind his ear. His earring jiggled back in forth and Lance didn’t know why, but it made him weak in the knees. Keith rarely put on his earrings, _but when he did… Woo boy._

Calm down, Ramirez, calm down.

Lance’s feet stayed glued on the ground, waiting for Keith to come at him. Unfortunately, the junior who wolf whistled was either brave to approach a guy like Keith, whose usual face looked as if he wanted to murder everyone on sight, or was just stupid as fuck.

“Hey there hottie! I’m Julien and you must be the man of my dreams.” Lance was pretty sure Julien winked or something of the sort since Keith looked super annoyed and that only happened when Lance, himself flirted with him.

Julien was a bit shorter than Keith so when Keith extended his hand, Lance almost gasped. What’s up with these young people thirsting over Keith?!

Not that he doesn’t get it, but what the hell.

“Keith.”

Julien caught his hand for the handshake but the moment he made contact, the junior gasped quietly in pain and doubled over. And Lance smirked. _Hell yeah_. No one except Lance calls Keith a hottie and gets away with their hands.

Keith quickly dropped his hand and Julien immediately covered with it with his healthy one and brought it to his chest. Keith pushed him out of the way and strolled over to Lance. This close Lance saw that the black haired had some blue paint a little bit under his right ear sliding over to his jaw, right to his cheek. Lance had the urge to lick his thumb and clean it off just like his mother does, but he remembered how disgusted by this Keith may be and he didn’t want to get punched today. Plus he liked his face too much for that _thank you_.

For a few seconds they just stared at each other, but then Lance realized how quiet it was so when he brought his gaze to his teammates and the younger players he caught them watching him and Keith. Lance rolled his eyes.

So nosy.

“Didn’t you all hear what coach said? Get to work!”

All of a sudden everyone moved to get the balls from the floor and when Lance made sure, everyone started practicing, he looked back at Keith. The Korean was crossing his arms and unfortunately, his beautiful grey-blue-purple eyes weren’t focused on him, but on Julien who winked at him. Lance frowned. Apparently a threat for a broken hand wasn’t enough for the boy to learn that this means ‘_back off, I’m actually in a friends with benefits situation with the captain of the basketball team who is ten times more attractive than you, taller, stronger, smarter-_‘

_Okay stop measuring dicks with some dumbass, god Lance get a grip. _

Lance threw Julien what he assumed was his mastered ‘back off’ look. And it worked since blondie’s cheeks reddened in shame and hurried towards his team.

Keith had one brow raised, but when he and Lance met eyes he smirked and Lance wanted to scream. Who gave him the right to look so irresistible? 

“Looks like you ain’t the only one who has people fawning over?”

Okay. _Now_.

First of all, Lance wasn’t lying to Keith about the promposals he received yesterday, no matter how many times Keith would say it’s not true and that he’s bluffing. And while Lance knew a lot of people crushed on him, it was only because he was one of the ‘popular’ kids around and because he was the basketball captain. He was something like Troy Bolton or whatever. However, Keith didn’t know how many people also crushed on him. Lance lost number of the times he’d overhear girls and boys talking about how pretty the Korean is, how cute, how hot and sexy his ‘bad boy’ bravado was. They talked about his hair and legs and ass and while that made Lance boil with jealousy, but not because of some kind of ridiculous possessiveness, but because Lance couldn’t do the same. Boys without shame talked about their thirst, while Lance was scared. Not only of the fact that he’s bisexual and the coming out part, but also of the fact that he was scared of his feelings for Keith. No one has ever made him feel such strong emotions as Keith did. People were in no way homophobic anymore, like back in the day and no one would shame him, but Lance was a bit more sensitive, so he just… needed more time.

Lance, too, wanted to gush about Keith’s eyes and hair and muslces and not to be worried about people’s reactions. More importantly. Keith’s reaction.

And second? The fact that Keith’s Texan accent slipped in sometimes without him knowing was the most adorable thing Lance has ever heard. Keith said ‘yall’ or ‘ain’t’ a lot of times when he was either super smug or super angry. And right now, he was definitely smug. Poor boy really thought only two guys, his ex boyfriend (Lance almost threw up in his mouth when he thought about that scum) and Lance were the only ones in this school that found him attractive.

“I still have one more promposal than you Mr-my-brother-is-from-Japan-too!” Lance rolled his eyes and laughed when he saw Keith scowling.

Keith “playfully” hit him on the shoulder and Lance tried not to wince. Fucking shit Keith even hit harder than Kinkade.

“Hey! I was trying to be nice! At least I wasn’t an asshole to Daishi!”

Lance gasped in offence and put a hand over his heart. “I wasn’t an asshole! I was simply trying to protect you from human interaction. You know. Socializing is pretty terrifying for you, Mister Kogane.”

Without meaning to, he got closer to Keith and dipped his face as if he was about to kiss the shorter boy.

And sometimes, _just sometimes_, Lance would imagine that this wasn’t just some normal banter between friends, but rather… a banter between boyfriends. It was scary how many times he’d accidentally slip out an ‘I like you’ while making out or just when they simply were hanging out. And how perfectly the brunette could make out a daydream where Keith came to watch him practice, just because he missed him and wanted to tell him how art class went.

So yeah. He may have, without meaning to, lowered his head wanting to kiss the boy. Sue him, Keith was just really too irresistible and he almost forgot not everyone knew about the ‘arrangement’ between them.

Oops.

Keith put a hand on his chest and Lance wasn’t ready to admit how a simple touch like that made goosebumps rise all over his body, a warm fire igniting right where Keith put his palm.

However, the action meant more of a ‘_stop_’ rather than an ‘_I just wanted to touch you_’. And for two months making out and a four years of knowing each other, the Cuban knew exactly which touch meant what.

A subtle panic erupted over Lance.

Oh Jesus, what if Keith actually really found out about his crush? God, god, god, god, _time to fucking die-_

“We have to talk, Lance.”

And his tone was so. Neutral. Without any emotion.

Call Lance a coward, but he did not want to have this conversation right now. He knew what would happen. Keith would say something along the lines ‘I know how you feel about me and sorry, but I don’t feel the same way-‘ and Lance will just laugh it off and go jump off some cliff driving his mom’s car.

He wasn’t ready so he put on a frown.

“Can’t mullet. I have to practice more and yeah-… sorry.”

He turned his back on his crush, not wanting to look at his reaction.

“Lance, you shit you promised!” Keith yelled quietly and accusingly.

“I said after practice Keithy-boy! Don’t wanna disappoint coach Shiro, ya know!” Lance yelled back which caused some curious hands to turn around.

“We both know you’ll practice max three hours after it ends!”

“Sounds like your problem!”

He expected Keith to huff angrily, leave the hall or maybe sit on the bleachers, just out of stubbornness to annoy Lance with his distractive presence. He expected Keith to yell more insults his way. He expected Keith to just _do_ something that screamed KEITH.

What he didn’t expect was to hear a loud thump of something heavy hitting the ground behind him and steps coming closer. He cautiously and slowly turned around in time to see Keith pulling the sleeves of his shirt up to his forearms. His very, very muscular forearms. Lance’s head boomed in an alarm with his voice ‘BAD IDEA BAD IDEA BAD IDEA’ yelling over and over again.

Keith passed by him with a very angry walking and very quickly picked up one of the balls right in front of his and everyone else’s shocked gazes. The Korean dribbled with the ball his hands just to try out the feeling and Lance suddenly got reminded that in front of him stood the little brother of one of the best basketball players in all history. Keith surely picked up a lot of things. Knowing Keith he probably did it effortlessly.

The black haired put the ball between his arm and torso and his other he put on his hip and he looked like some kind of top Calvin Klein model that was on the cover of an expensive ass magazine. That Lance used to collect when he was a freshman.

Why the fuck did he ever think he was heterosexual when Keith Kogane and male Calvin Klein models existed?

Keith noticed his starring. He rose an unimpressive eyebrow. Lance felt heat creeping up his ears and cheeks and he repressed the urge to press his palms to cool his face down. He uncertainly crossed his arms as if they’d protect him from his crush’s unknown sexiness.

“What are you doing?”

Ugh. Can he ask this more stupidly? It was painfully obvious what were Keith’s intensions.

Keith just patted gently the ball and spoke confidently. “If practicing is the only way you’re going to talk to me without being a whiney baby, then so be it. You’ll be productive to your team _and _talk to me. It’s a win-win situation,” he smirked, “unless you’re scared.”

Sure. Right. Of course, mix up a sexy Keith with his inner athlete that always wants to win and you’ve won Lance Ramirez. For a moment, Lance kind of forgot they weren’t alone so when James’s voice joined their conversation, their bubble of teasing-flirting and suggestive glances burst.

“Yo, Lance maybe if you don’t wanna dribble with Kogane here, I can do it instead?”

See, if it was another person asking this Lance might have believed it was a genuine desire to help. However, this was James Griffin and pretty much everyone in this goddamn school, except for Keith, knew about his crush on the black haired senior. And if his suggestive tone didn’t imply something, then Lance didn’t know what else someone should do to show off they had the hots for Keith, except for just straight up telling him. Just like Daishi, Rolo and Julien did.

Lance gritted his teeth.

Without breaking off eye contact with Lance, Keith’s smirk if it was possible grew more.

“You know what Griffin, I might take up your offe-“

“God, you are _so_ annoying!”

Lance huffed and went over to Keith who just opened his mouth to say something, when the door opened and _god dammit if that isn’t Shiro, Lance would punch himse-_ wait no it was Shiro, thank God.

While the adult was walking towards them he rose an eyebrow at the sight of his younger brother, with a basketball under his armpit, smiling smugly at Lance.

“What’s going on? Keith what are you doing here?”

“I came here to talk with Lance, but he said that he has more to practice and we all know he’s an overworking asshole so he’d stay over for hour or so afterwards and I’m not willing to wait all this time just so I can have a word or two with him.”

“The overworking part is rich coming from you, Keith.”

Lance aggressively gestured towards Shiro. The Korean simply scowled.

“Show me where I asked.”

“Just stating some facts.”

“I still don’t remember asking about your facts.”

“I so wish I could slap you in the back of your head right now, but I could get fired for this so I’m just going to wait ‘till you get home.”

“Thanks, I really feel the love.”

Lance didn’t realize he was smiling, but how he could not. The banter between Keith and Shiro was always entertaining to watch and it reminded Lance of him and his siblings.

“Okay then, just don’t distract the others.”

_Yeah right tell that to your very hot brother, Shiro._

Lance gestured with his head towards one of the areas where they would dribble.

Shiro blew his whistle. “Okay team couple up. We’re doing some offense defense dribbles. You switch places. The usual, but for the new annoying addition to the team today,” Shiro threw a smirk at Keith, but his brother only gave him a deadpan look, “If you’re at offense, you gotta get past the defense and score a point and if you’re at defense-“

“I have to try to get the ball, try to score by myself and pass on to the next couple of players. I know. I’m not twelve coach Shirogane.” Keith threw his equal amount of sass back at Shiro and Lance noticed the team snickering, but when they saw Shiro giving them the stink eye, all shut up.

“Very well then. First off, Daibazaal and Williams.”

The players made a column and Lance was about to chit-chat a bit before their turn, when Julien in front of them turned around and winked at Keith.

“For the record, I think you’re a wonderful addition to the team.”

Griffin next to him punched the junior on the shoulder.

“God, O’Connor do you ever shut the fuck up?”

Julien rubbed his shoulder and his eyes went back and forth between him and James.

“Sheesh what do you all have against some flirting, Jesus fucking Christ-“

“Maybe ‘cuz he’s not interested in your flirting, idiot.” Lance spat back.

Keith huffed which drew all the attention onto him. Julien grinned.

“Why don’t you let the samurai here decide for himself, huh?”

Keith’s gaze was so unimpressed, so poker face like, and honestly, if he ever wanted to pursue a future as a poker player, he’d definitely make some.

“I’m from Korea.”

Lance was really about to laugh and judging by James’s expression he was in the same pit as Lance.

The blonde haired rose an eyebrow, a confused look on his face.

“So…?” His question was kind of careful, testing the waters, as if he knew there was something wrong with his statement, but wasn’t about to risk acting like he knew what he was talking about.

Lance finally let it out and laughed, James joining him a few seconds later and Keith was simply just amused.

“Samurais are from Japan, dumbass.” The Cuban decided to help out the lost junior. Julien’s cheeks flamed and he crossed his arms and gave his back to them, obviously ashamed of his pathetic way to flirt with the black haired.

“I didn’t know you were from Korea, man."

James’s genuine interest sparked confusion in Lance. Since when did Griffin care? Was he already making moves on Keith? Did he really think he’d get such personal information from the Keith Kogane? As if Keith would so easily-

“Yeah. My actual name and surname are actually japanese, so I'm probably half-japanese, but my father died when I was little so I'll never know the actual story. I lived in Seoul for eleven years in the orphanage until my second cousin found out about me and came from America to take me to live with him in Texas." Keith shrugged and nodded his head towards Shiro who was yelling orders now at Ryan and the sophomore who was his partner, apparently.

James’s eyes sparkled with curiosity and Lance was finally going to admit it.

He was jealous. That sinking feeling in his gut, whenever his crushes got their attention taken by someone else. The fact that Keith was comfortable with someone else to share such vital info about him that not everyone knew. Lance prided himself in being one of the few people who knew Keith’s backstory, but apparently this wasn’t the case anymore. He hoped the jealousy wasn’t showing on his face. He really did.

“That’s cool, can you speak it?”

Keith grinned. “네.” (yes.)

James narrowed his eyes, with a little smile gracing his lips. “Was that an yes?”

Then Keith did something that absolutely, utterly surprised Lance.

He checked James out.

It was barely there and he was pretty sure James missed it, but Lance definitely saw it. And he was really about to choke. _What the hell?_ Since when was Keith the flirty one? Also wasn’t a part of the arrangement to not do something with others while they were fooling around? Not that they… _established_ rules per se and he wasn’t going to judge Keith or blame him, but- but-

The thought of Keith running his hands through someone else’s body, his soft lips kissing someone else’s made him feel sick. For the past year (even longer if Lance was ready to give up his pride), Lance only had eyes for the Korean next to him and just imagining Keith with someone else, imagining that he was actually not that significant in Keith’s love life just killed all of the little hopes of the shorter boy returning his feelings, made the unrequited crush feel realer, _rawer_. And Lance wasn’t really going to admit it hurt him more than he expected.

He turned his gaze to James and did a check himself. Griffin was in just a grey tank top and black sweatpants that hung lowly on his hips. His hairstyle was horrible, but these days he tied that little sad bang in a man-bun. And okay, he’ll admit it, he wasn’t an ugly dude. He had the looks, he had the personality that was bearable, but wasn’t Lance, don’t know, _more attractive, more charming_? Was Keith’s type the complete opposite of Lance? Did he finally decide he could have anyone and finally ditch him? And for Griffin? That sure would hurt him and his ego a lot. And it was already a bit bruised already. So that was saying a lot.

“Maybe.” Keith smiled smugly and he saw James’s cheeks have darkened.

‘_You and me both, buddy_’ Lance thought.

Shiro unnecessarily blew his whistle very loud that it hurt Lance’s ears. He and the rest of the waiting line winced in pain.

“Griffin and O’Connor!”

James quickly turned around and he and junior went to have their turn. The Cuban waited for them both to be a bit far away so he can have his privacy when he talked with Keith. Not taking his eyes off Griffin’s muscular back he spoke.

_Mine’s probably more ripped_, Lance smugly thought.

“Didn’t know you had the hots for Griffin.” He hoped his tone wasn’t too bitter, but he kind of hoped Keith caught a glimpse of his annoyance.

Keith hummed lowly and Lance wasn’t going to admit how sexy it sounded. And after a few seconds he only added, “I didn’t know either.”

Lance didn’t let the shock overtake him as he shifted on his place, still not taking his eyes off Griffin who managed to get the ball from Julien and scored a point. His face turned as he immediately searched for someone’s approval and judging by where his eyes trailed, he searched for Keith’s. It was easy to catch Keith’s eye since he was already watching and Griffin shamelessly winked at him.

Lance huffed in annoyance. That finally brought Keith’s attention back on him.

“I actually wanted to talk about us.” His eyes stubbornly remained on him as he probably wanted to know Lance’s genuine reaction. However, Keith didn’t know the Cuban already had his suspicions about what this conversation was going to be. So Lance was able to mask his misery perfectly and put on his neutral face.

“What about us?” He hoped he kept it low key and Keith didn’t catch his nervousness.

“I-“

“Keith and Lance, your turn!”

Keith moved his gaze from Lance and went to grab the ball from Julien who muttered a ‘good luck’ accompanied with a flirty grin and Lance was really close to punching him.

Shiro stood there with crossed arms, raised eyebrow and an amused smile.

“So who’s defense and who’s offense?”

Lance and Keith threw each other a look.

“Uhhh-“

“We can play rock, paper, scissors?” the Korean threw him a hesitant look as he asked.

Lance and Shiro laughed. “Okay do it. Whoever wins is at offense.”

Keith won with his scissors and threw him a smug look. Lance really was going to miss this. After Keith cancels this out, nothing was going to be the same, no matter how Lance was trying to convince himself.

Keith dribbled between his legs a bit. Lance spread his own as he waited for his attack.

“I want to… stop this thing between us.”

Lance felt his breath leaving his mouth in shock. Yes, he knew this would happen, but some part of him still hoped this wasn’t the reason. He tried not to change his expression as he tried not to glance at Keith’s face and kept his eyes on the ball that Keith was still dribbling.

“Are you going to attack anytime this year?”

He knew his tone was cold and rude, but at this point he didn’t care. All he wanted now was to go home, drink tea with his mama and listen to her gossip. He wanted to go in his bed and sleep for all eternity. He hated this so much. He hated it.

“Aren’t you going to say something?”

He finally let himself to look at Keith who had an angry, yet a sorrowful look on his face. Lance was confused. Why would Keith be sad? He’s the one who wants to stop this. The taller wouldn’t judge him or something, why was Keith making this harder than it should be? Why it must be always complicated for him?

Angrily Lance stood on his full height and glared at the shorter boy. Anger was travelling up his veins, boiling his blood, slowly building up.

“The fuck do you want me to say?! Sure? Okay? Do whatever, if that’s what you want? Why does it have to be difficult with you?”

He noticed Shiro’s confused frown and the team’s curious glances at the couple with the corner of his eyes, but Lance kept his eyes at Keith.

“Boys I think you should talk in private mayb-“

“I don’t know Lance! Something? Did you seriously not give a fuck?”

And honestly? The accusation of the person, who Lance might actually be in love with, saying he didn’t give a fuck about their… kind of relationship or whatever they had, made him want to break and hit and kick. Who was _Keith _to say that shit to him. Keith was always the one who looked like he didn’t like the idea of them doing the things they did no matter how many times Lance had asked if it was okay. And Keith knew damn well that to tango you’d need two people.

“That’s rich coming from someone who usually doesn’t give a fuck about anything.”

It was a low blow, Lance would admit. But Keith made him feel so many emotions all at once and it was hard to sort them out.

Keith all of a sudden moved too fast for Lance to do something about the sudden attack he went for. Lance was fast, but right now Keith was angry and when the black haired was mad, nothing could stop him. He went to Lance’s right and it was too late when he realized that Keith was fucking with him, when the Korean dribbled to his left immediately and threw the ball. And it went right through the hoop. Polite applauses erupted. Score.

Keith quickly went to gather the bouncing ball. He turned around and Lance expected a smug smirk, a teasing grin perhaps. What he got was Keith hitting Lance’s chest with the ball, which he received with a soft grunt because of the impact. He met Keith’s gorgeous eyes, wet with tears that yet had to fall down and Lance’s heart sank in his chest, regret filling his entire being.

“You’re such-…” Keith blinked and one tear fell down gently. Lance almost dropped the ball, in effort to wipe it away and kiss his forehead.

“You’re such a fucking dick, Ramirez.” He hissed.

Lance swallowed.

Keith raised his hand as if he was about to hit his shoulder and Lance was impressed at himself that he didn’t flinch. However only a soft, sad thump landed on the ball. Keith huffed with a smile and it definitely wasn’t humorous.

The entire team, including Shiro, were silent as Keith carefully went and picked his backpack from the ground and left as quickly as he could.

The silence completely contrasted with Lance’s heart beating as if he was playing and he was about to score a point.

His inner voice kept repeating only one thing and his lungs felt as if they were suffocating themselves.

_You fucked up, You fucked up, You fucked up ._

.

Needless to say, after that Lance didn’t make one basket through all of the remaining practice.


	2. find u again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Hey, are you uh-… are you feeling better now?”
> 
> Classic Lance, trying to make a conversation because he didn’t want to make things awkward. Adorable. And also frustrating. Keith almost yelled ‘I LITERALLY HAD YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH!’ but hey he was raised better than this."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey lobelies! i wanted to post wayyyy sooner, but it was hard to finish this chapter when all of my family used this laptop. but i still managed to post it before the year ended :D . anyways this is entirely from Keith's POV, but fear not pinning lance stans, because the next chap is gonna be from Lance's POV. 
> 
> i hope u like it, i love u all and thank u so much for the feedback!!  
enjoy <3

_“ you ain’t my boyfriend (boyfriend)_

_and i ain’t your girlfriend (girlfriend) . “_

2 months later – April 2055

“Hey, babe do you want me to pick up some chips?”

Keith was thoughtfully looking at the aisle, trying to remember what chips flavor his boyfriend liked. His phone was carefully put between his shoulder and ear as he waited for an answer.

“Hmm, wait I’m gonna go check, we might have some at home.”

The black haired huffed softly and put his arms on the handle of the shopping cart. He looked once again at all the items he was about to buy and tried to remember the list Shiro gave him, but Keith refused to take. His brother claimed he’d forget at least one thing, but Keith kept insisting that his memory was great and he wasn’t an old man like him. Which got him a hard slap on the shoulder, which yes he deserved, but still. Teasing Shiro was a part of his personality.

“Yep, we have two bags and coke. You can buy something sweet though, ‘cuz I’m keeping a diet, plus I don’t have this huge ass sweet tooth like you.”

Keith took that as a yes to finally move from the snack aisle and he headed towards the sweets.

“I’m already doing it. Also I don’t get why you’re still keeping that diet, Shiro said it’s perfectly okay to stop. You guys already won the last game,” he saw a big bag full of marshmallows that immediately caught his interest and he glanced up to see the price and cried on the inside when he saw it was too expensive, “and you’re still hot so I don’t see the point.”

He heard shuffling on the other side and then a chuckle. “Are you flirting with me, Kogane?”

“Not a chance, Griffin.” He smiled smugly.

Yep, here he was. In the supermarket, picking up food for his movie marathon with his boyfriend that would probably end with great sex. His boyfriend – the one and only James Griffin. His boyfriend that was certainly _not_ Lance Ramirez. You’re probably thinking ‘_Wow kind of fast jumping from the boy you’re in love with to some random guy?_’ Which before you judge Keith, he’s going to tell you that at least he let James take him on dates before he accepted being his boyfriend. And yes, he’s still desperately in love with Lance, but it’d definitely pass soon, since he has someone now. Someone that was not as handsome as Lance, or tall, or muscular, or funny, or smart, or kind- _Not the point, Keith._

_Stop comparing them, stop, stop, stop._

Just when he was grabbing a Haribo ‘Happy Cola’ pack (his favorite), he heard a loud laughter that Keith immediately identified that belonged to Allura. He threw the red bag in the cart and turned around to search his friend, but the view he saw made his heart drop low in his stomach and for his palms to start sweating. His breath caught up in his throat as panic erupted in his whole body.

Allura and Lance were holding hands, Allura’s other hand clutching her stomach as she was apparently having trouble breathing, from all the fun Lance probably caused. Because no matter how often Keith would tease him of not being funny, Lance was actually one of the few people who could bring him to tears from too much laughter. Speaking of Lance, he was talking through his smile as he held a ridiculously looking female bra, obviously mocking it. And okay, Keith wasn’t judging anyone, but whoever designed that was probably high on something.

The color was yellow, but not your typical happy bright yellow, it was a yellow that resembled more piss than anything else. It also had so many accessories on it. From fake jewels, to glitter, bows and a chain connecting the two cups. At the top of it there was the head of- Was that _Hello Kitty?_ _Seriously what the fuck?_

Lance slipped his hand from Allura’s and put the bra on his chest as more laughter came from Allura. Keith couldn’t hear what was Lance speaking, but judging from the white haired it was probably something hilarious. Keith brought a fist to hide his smile.

“Yo babe, what happened you kinda went quiet?”

Keith was so enchanted by the couple in front of him that he forgot that James and he were still talking to each other on the phone.

_‘Not the first time it has happened’_ Keith thought bitterly to himself.

The Korean faked a cough. “Yea sorry I just- uhh,“ It was at that moment that Lance saw him and his expression went through so many emotions and it was all so fast that Keith couldn’t read any of them. However at the end he settled for a smile and waved at Keith which he returned. Allura turned around with furrowed eyebrows, but when her eyes recognized him, her face lit up.

_‘Oh God, she’s supposed to hate me I’m literally in love with her boyfriend, what is this?’_

She eagerly took the bra from Lance’s hands and put it back where it was and took his hand instead and led Lance towards him.

Well shit.

“Uh- I just saw Allura and Lance.”

“Oh okay, say hi to them from me. Are you going to hang up?”

“They’re coming over, but if you’re willing to wait thirty minutes on the phone, knowing they both have running mouths-“

“Okay, okay! I get it! I’m waiting for you at home, alright?”

“Alright.”

“Bye, love you.”

And there it was. The ‘I love you’ that James threw around so easily and well… maybe for him it was, but for someone like Keith saying that in a two month relationship was too fast. _Way too fast._ He finally said it to Rolo three months before he found out he was cheating on him. Which hurt more than he admitted, but he got over it. And James was being so pushy about it and they already had a fight about it. They didn’t talk for two days and Keith was a bit ashamed to admit he didn’t notice it until James texted him. They didn’t mention it again, didn’t talk about it which Keith knew was kind of unhealthy since the key to a good relationship was communication, but ah well, they had an amazing sex after James apologized and Keith kind of forgot about it. He knew he was being an awful human being, going out with the brunette just because he had a great time in bed with him and a decent one outside of it. And it distracted him enough from the Allura and Lance situation. Figured out Keith would stay with him because of it. The same happened with Lance. And his relationship with the James was doomed since he accepted to go out with him. He knew they wouldn’t have a loving fulfilling relationship, Keith wasn’t dumb and his boyfriend didn’t notice much since he was too focused on his basketball a bit too much. James would soon see that Keith wasn’t that special as he first thought and will ditch him. And Keith would probably be a bit sad, but his heart wouldn’t ache like it did after he found Rolo cheated or when he broke off the arrangement between him and Lance.

“Mhm, bye babe.”

He may have said the ‘babe’ part a bit louder than he intended when Lance and Allura finally arrived at his side, but hey he was only human and Lance obviously didn’t care anymore. He turned off his phone and put it in the back pocket of his black jeans and put on a smile.

“Hey guys how’s it goi-?”

“Keith!”

The brown skinned girl hugged him around the waist and lifted him a bit. Keith wasn’t surprised by her inhuman strength anymore after four years and he knew he wasn’t exactly light, so kudos to her. He hugged her back, but when she tightened her hold and it was harder to breathe he patted her on the back and muttered ‘cant’t breathe’. She let out an ‘oops’ and put him down.

She grabbed his shoulders and jiggled him back and forth as she whined. “I missed you so much! In art class there was no one to fix my shitty drawings and you missed all of the gossip that happened! And I think Romelle is finally asking out Nyma to prom!”

Then she retreaded back at Lance’s side with a happy jump. Keith pretended that it didn’t bother him.

Despite his sour mood, Keith got excited for Romelle, she was really nervous to ask her crush out.

“No, really? Why didn’t she call me?”

“She didn’t want to bother you, because you were sick. And she wanted to surprise you!” Allura’s face went from happy to devastated as she realized what kind of information she leaked.

“Ugh I’m so stupid.” She slumped her head on Lance’s bicep and buried her face in it in fake shame. Keith tried not to feel jealous, but from experience Keith knew how comfortable Lance’s arm was. He wasn’t buff like Shiro, but he was definitely muscular, yet soft from all the creams and stuff for skin he was using. It was the perfect place for leaning on when you’re tired. Once Lance shared with him that he wanted to get a sleeve tattoo and Keith was horrified because no! That smooth brown skin covered in ink?! _Hell no_! But then the thought of Lance with tattoos got so sexy to him that he wasn’t opposed to it anymore, hell, he was even looking forward to it.

“I’m just gonna act surprised when she tells me then.” Keith shrugged with a smile.

A nice, familiar tune came from Allura’s coat and she pulled her phone out. When she saw the name of whoever was on the screen made her furrow her eyebrows. Lance looked over and then glanced questioningly at his girlfriend.

Keith was about to ask what’s wrong when Allura announced.

“It’s an unknown number.”

She hesitantly accepted the call.

“Hello? ...Yes? Oh yes yes…’ she was confused obviously, until a huge smile broke over her beautiful face, “NO WAY! OH MY GOD THANK YOU! Yes, of course!” She jumped around like a child and then did the moonwalk. “Mhm, yea sure ma’am I will, thank you so much! Goodbye!”

When she ended the call, she screamed a bit and then threw herself on Lance. Her boyfriend immediately caught her.

“Lance, Lance, I GOT INTO ALTEA! I DID IT, OH MY GOD!”

“NO WAY ARE YOU SERIOUS?!” A gorgeous smile appeared on Lance’s face and he twirled around Allura and it was such a beautiful moment for them, it looked so much like one of those cliché romantic movies he watched with Shiro and _fuck_ Keith wasn’t sure he was supposed to witness it and he felt so awkward and so not on place.

Lance put Allura on the ground and this time Keith initiated the hug. He hugged her around the waist while she threw her arms around his neck.

“Congrats ‘Lura you deserve it, I’m so happy for you.”

“Hell yeah I do and you my dear Keithelangelo are next.”

Despite the horrible nickname she’d given him, he still laughed. She winked mischievously like him wanting to get accepted into Altea was a secret only between him and her. And like always, he really, really felt bad for her. Here she was being supportive, loving and kind, yet Keith was the one who was supposed to be the supportive right now. They were friends since freshman, they had so much fun outside and in school. She was always genuinely encouraging towards him and the fact that he was over here thirsting over her boyfriend and couldn’t show her how really _happy_ he was for her achievement, made him feel even shittier. How much he wished he had Shiro’s skill of talking and masking his obvious pain and uncomfortableness.

She pulled away from their hug then got on her tippy toes to peck Lance on the cheek.

“Dear I’m going to get ice cream, because this is definitely getting celebrated! You keep Keith company! I’ll be back in a bit!”

And with that she left the boys, happiness obvious in her step.

And well okay. Now he’s alone with Lance. Great. Juuust… great.

“Hey, are you uh-… are you feeling better now?”

Classic Lance, trying to make a conversation because he didn’t want to make things awkward. Adorable. And also frustrating. Keith almost yelled ‘I LITERALLY HAD YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH!’ but hey he was raised better than this.

“Yeah. I mean… ” He looked sideways and saw a box of cookies with chocolate cream in them. Now _that_ caught his attention. “It was just a fever, nothing serious.”

“It must’ve been a virus or something. Nadia was sick the previous week too.”

At the mention of Lance’s adorable little niece he perked. He reached his hand for the box and put it in his cart. “She’s okay now, yes?”

“Yeah she is.”

A certain rainbow colored pack full of lollipops made him want to reach out and take it and _dammit_ he had a problem, but the lollipops had cherry and blueberry flavors! How can he not buy this?

“They miss you by the way.”

“Who?” He decided to play dumb.

“My family. Rachel and Luis are always complaining that they don’t have a documentary buddy, Veronica misses another person who can make fun of me, Nadia misses you and your hair and Sylvio misses your alien stories which are still absolutely ridiculous and horrifying in my opinion, Keith he’s eight!” Both let out huffs of laughter, a memory of Keith getting too much into it and the whole Ramirez family being horrified, except for Sylvio of course.

Keith’s heart ached at the mention of his neighbors. He was always close with the Ramirez’s since he, Shiro and Adam moved in from all the way from Texas. He still remembered their third day in the house. There were three weeks until Christmas and Keith was watching some Christmas movie with this new actor that was really hot. Kosmo was curled up in his lap while Shiro was “peacefully” watching some basketball match on his pad and Keith could hear the distant uplifting voice of the commentator from Shiro’s headphones. Adam was visiting his family in Mexico so it was just his cousin (more like a brother, calling Shiro his cousin never really felt quite right), Keith and his dog.

Just when the hot actor was admitting to his best friend that he was in love with his girlfriend through tears, the doorbell rang. Kosmo lifted his hand in curiosity, but didn’t bother to get up or bark. He was always a peaceful dog and with contrast with Keith’s fiery personality, they fit each other very well. The black haired peeked at his brother who either purposefully ignored the doorbell, was too caught up in the game or just assumed that Keith would get it, the fucker. Keith sighed heavily and got up while he cleaned himself from all the popcorn he consumed like a pig. He threw a quick look at himself at the mirror next to the door to see if he looked acceptable and the answer was no, but he didn’t really care much.

He really didn’t expect much when he opened the door, but he certainly was surprised to see a light browned skinned woman (that really resembled Adam’s skin too), about his height, brown-black hair that was braided and thrown over her shoulder. Her hair was also really long and it looked so healthy, and damn, Keith was really impressed and curious, because he wanted to grow out his hair long too. She wasn’t plump nor she was thin, but she managed to look athletic and full of life. She was smiling wide and was carrying a huge plate that was covered in foil carefully.

“Um… hello ma’am can I help you with something?”

Keith didn’t know what he said that made the woman in front of him smile even wider and for her really blue eyes to sparkle with such happiness, but didn’t care. She looked like that type of person who made you want to be approved of and didn’t want to disappoint ever.

“Hello, young man. Are you by any chance supposed to be Mr. Shirogane’s little brother?”

She was obviously a neighbor, though Keith didn’t know from which house. They were fairly new into the town, they haven’t even moved in fully yet, but Shiro was a social butterfly so of course there were already people who adored him from just one conversation. And bringing food apparently. If it wasn’t for he and Adam, his brother would probably live from ramen, mac and cheese and fried eggs. To this day the Korean was thankful that his brother-in-law taught him how to cook. Although not as great as him.

“Yea, I am. Do you want me to get him or-…“ He gestured awkwardly towards the house, but the woman simply waved away in dismissal, that happy smile still on her face.

“There’s no need to bother him, dear. I am Luna Carillo, nice to meet you. You must be Keith, Mr. Shirogane mentioned you a lot.”

Keith laughed a bit. “Yeah, he tends to embarrass me a lot in front of strangers.”

She reached her hand for a handshake, and Keith was quite impressed, because damn that plate looked heavy. He caught her hand that was rough, yet soft and he could feel a bit of the callоuses from all the hard work she probably did.

“Nonsense, he said only good things. You all look like a great family. My son, Leandro, is a huge fan of him and I’m really glad he has someone as amazing as your brother as an idol. And his husband Adam – also a great, outstanding man. I knew his mother in college, so he probably had an amazing childhood. And you Keith, such a handsome, polite boy you’d get quite along with mine, he’s the same age as you. Although he’s quite the loud mouth I must say.” She laughed at her own words, but a look flashed over her face and apologetic smile replaced the happy one. “Forgive me, I tend to blabber a lot. This is for you. It’s still a bit hot so be careful.”

She handed him the plate and Keith took it with a grateful smile. It smelled so _freaking good_, like Adam’s cooking and he almost groaned in pleasure.

“It’s okay Mrs. Carillo. Shiro sucks at cooking, Adam is visiting his family and is coming back in a few days, but I’ve been so caught up in all the moving that I haven’t had the time to cook. Plus I’m not really confident in my cooking skills when Adam isn’t around to correct me. And it’s refreshing to talk to someone other besides my brother and dog.”

At first Keith was kind of shocked at himself for talking and sharing so much with a stranger, but the woman was just so calming and to someone with Keith who never knew his mother, Luna Carillo was the embodiment of a sunshine put in the body of a small middle-aged woman for him. She also carried that strong and comfortable motherly aura around her. He got another happy toothy smile and a chuckle.

“It must be hard for someone as young as you to be in a new city, for sure. Just so you know, my house and its doors are always open for you and your family. And don’t hesitate to ask for help, we live in the huge blue house, you can’t miss it! Especially from all the noise that’s coming from it!”

“Thank you Ma’am, I’ll keep it in mind.”

The woman only patted him softly on the shoulder and then squeezed it. Keith was surprised of how much he didn’t mind it.

“No need to be so formal Keith, just call me Luna. Send my greetings to Mr. Shirogane and Adam! I hope we see each other soon. Happy holidays!”

“Happy Holidays to you too, Luna.”

And with a satisfied smile, she patted him on the shoulder again and went on her way. 

Since that day Keith always made sure he had time for Lance’s mother. She was easily one of the most wonderful people he’s ever met. No wonder Lance turned out to be such a beautiful inside and out man with a woman like this in his life.

“Mom asks you about a lot too. She misses you a lot. You haven’t visited since…”

Since their fight while Lance had basketball practice.

Keith couldn’t help but feel ashamed and awful whenever he thought about it. The way he behaved that day to Lance was wrong, however he didn’t regret that he called the whole thing off. He just wished he ended it in a more peaceful, nicer way. Of course, he and Lance ‘made up’, if you can call it that way. The whole conversation was awkward as heck full of _‘I’m sorry’s_ and _‘It’s okay’s_ just going back and forth between them. Two months later and they haven’t been the same, their interactions were dry, awkward and lifeless, if they were alone. Gone was their usual banter, the heartfelt teasing and the low key flirting. Keith missed it so much, he missed his best friend. He knew the ‘friends with benefits’ thing wasn’t a good idea, yet he did it anyways. Now he couldn’t be himself with one of the few people in this world who actually understood him and fully knew him. Keith hurt and probably so did Lance and the guilt was eating his heart away, but… it was better this way. Better to distance himself and fall in love with his _actual_ boyfriend, rather than still chase after his best friend who was taken by a very dear friend whom he genuinely loved too.

“Yeah…” Keith fiddled with she sleeves of his jacket nervously and looked somewhere down, away from Lance’s blue eyes that always got through to him. “I miss Luna too.”

Lance sighed sadly. “Marco also came back from Brazil and asked about you. Said he has some problem with his hover bike and hoped you’d come and check it out. He’s here ‘till Friday, you can swing by… if you don’t want to miss him.”

Keith finally dared to look up and Lance’s eyebrows were furrowed as if he was thinking about something that made him angry and sad at the same time.

“I’ll think about it. I have a lot of work to do these days, you know how it is.”

Lance’s eyes snapped to his and Keith was hit with such emotions, he had to repress the urge to wrap his arms around Lance and breathe in in his familiar scent. Plus he looked so comfy in his black hoodie with zipper, Voltron’s emblem on it and matching sweatpants. So domestic and warm.

God, he missed Lance. He missed Lance _so much_.

Lance opened his mouth, but at that moment Allura emerged with a big bucket with Oreo ice cream.

_Lance’s favorite_, Keith’s brain failed to remind him.

They probably had favorite ice cream flavors, and favorite color, and did their face masks or something. Lance and Allura were probably really happy together. They were both beautiful, were one of the smartest people in Voltron, were the captains/heads of their respectful teams and both were accepted in Altea. A match made in heaven. No wonder they liked each other, they were like those badass power couples that were in every movie and everyone liked.

Of course Lance finally realized that he could do way better than Keith. It was a matter of a time and Keith knew it, yet he hurt anyways.

But it didn’t matter anymore. Lance was happy, Keith was happy, there was no need to dwell on it.

The Cuban’s eyes lit up as he noticed what Allura was holding and he made grabby hands towards the ice cream and Allura handed it to him, but Lance only rolled his eyes fondly and reached for his girlfriend instead as he was the one to press a kiss on her cheek this time. Allura’s blush was barely visible, but definitely there. She laughed and softly punched Lance’s chest.

“You sap.”

Lance only smiled.

Keith fidgeted on his place. Stars, this was so embarrassing.

“Uh guys I’m really feeling the love, but James is waiting for me at his place. We’ll see each other on Monday, alright?”

He threw them a sheepish smile. Lance’s face was unreadable, but he saluted with two fingers and a nod while Allura simply waved at him bye.

Keith turned around his cart and wondered for a millionth time when will this torture stop.

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

The weather was really nice. It was dawn and the sky was full of vibrant and beautiful colors. A wonderful mixture of pink, orange and red and Keith’s hands itched to take a picture just so he can later paint it. Painting landscapes was always his favorite artsy activity to do, since he was a little kid in the orphanage at Korea. He can vividly remember that art time in the afternoon was the best part of the day. The place there didn’t have much. A lot of pencils with certain colors that were important were missing and the acrylic paints were on the edge of emptying and Keith was way too awkward and shy (but also known as the “kid with anger issues”) to ask about new ones back then so he was always hoping the other kids who fancied art like him to ask. So most of the time he just sucked it up and used his 10 year old muscles to squirt as much as paint as he could onto the paper. There were lots of times where he asked this super nice boy who was so big, nice and he had really cute dimples and that might’ve been Keith’s first crush since whenever he asked Keith for help about his drawings, he felt like the happiest boy alive. To this day he wondered what happened to him since Shiro took him away. He really hoped he got the same opportunity to have an amazing family and friends just like Keith had his.

It was already spring so all of the trees in the neighborhood were all either pink, white or green. The sun was casting beams of light that were getting into his eyes, but he didn’t care one bit. It was also a bit colder than usual. Little pink and white leaves were going down, because of the light wind, making it look like some fairy tale. The day was so good. When he and Kosmo went to walk in the park this morning, he met up with Michelle. She was a cute 66 year old grandma that had an absolute adorable golden retriever named Molly. Whenever Keith visited the park in a good weather, since it was a bit far away, Michelle and Molly were always there. She was a wonderful company. Kosmo and Molly knew each other and played a lot in the dog area while Keith and Michelle talked. She was sassy and stubborn and he saw a lot of himself in her. He hadn’t seen her in a while since he had lots of tests and he felt sad, because she probably waited for him. So today he headed to the Oriande Park. And the conversation he had with Michelle really sparked something in him.

_{*}_

_It was a beautiful Saturday. After a few rainy days, the sun was finally the thing that woke him up, instead the sound of the drops of water banging on his window. He squinted due to the blinding light. His dog was nowhere in sight so that probably meant he either slept on the couch or in Shiro and Adam’s bedroom. Keith checked his charging phone. He had some messages from Pidge and James and notifications for YouTube videos._

_9:12AM. Great. He could still catch Michelle at the park. The muffled sound of the TV and Adam and Shiro talking got to his ears. He slowly sat up and yawned. He cracked his back and neck and slipped from his bed. He opened the window and breathed the fresh air. It smelt of spring and the light rain from yesterday. He smiled a little to himself. Damn. He loved days where he was waking up in an actually good mood. Keith hoped no one tried to ruin it, but knowing him and the people around him, it’d be too easy. He was getting down the stairs, running his hand through his messy hair when he finally could see Shiro and Adam. And oh. _

_Oh._

_In moments like these, Keith wondered if he should move out no matter how many times his brother insisted that it was okay._

_It was just so… sad to look at them like this. Shiro was simply watching the morning news, drinking his coffee, leaned against the counter. His husband was running his fingers through his hair gently and he had this look in his eyes that screamed ‘love, love, love I’m so in love’ and no matter how many times Keith tried to repress this feeling, this desire to have the same thing, he just couldn’t. And it hurt even more, because he could imagine himself like this with only one person. And said person couldn’t be his, didn’t want him probably. Didn’t want him in the same way Keith did, at least. The perfect daydream, wasn’t it? Keith and Lance, watching the news, cooking breakfast in their kitchen and Lance would be distracted and the Korean would just stare at him lovingly and run his fingers through his soft hair and probably kiss him on the cheek. And Lance would get all blush-y and Keith would just laugh, the brunette would follow and then they’d be kissing softly but with smiles on their mouths and- _

_Okay. Time out. Daydream about your actual boyfriend, god._

_Shiro noticed him first._

_“Morning. The weather is good so I assume you are going to take Kosmo out? If you’re too tired, I can go?”_

_Adam didn’t stop his fingers from the activity of messing with Shiro’s bed head, but he met Keith’s eyes and grinned softly. He nodded his head towards a plate that was covered with another plate on top._

_“There are pancakes, although you’re probably going to eat them after Kosmo’s walk?”_

_Keith nodded and headed towards the sink to fill himself a cup of water. After drinking it, he washed it and called out for Kosmo. He put food in his bowl, whistled and waited for his dog to come. As he waited, his attention got caught up on the TV. There were shots of celebrities, dressed in fancy clothes, posing in front of the flashing cameras. However the words that were at the bottom of the screen was the thing that got his interest. In big black letters was written ‘**LEGENDARY DEFENDER – SEQUEL AFTER ITS HUGE SUCCESS IS ALMOST FINISHED.**’_

_The memory of he and Lance going to watch the movie crawled in his mind immediately. It was before the whole fiasco happened so it was just two friends going to the movies. At least from Lance’s point of view probably. They thought the movie was going to be super lame, since the plot sounded kind of cliché, but they heard only positive reviews so they went. _

_And it was absolutely mind blowing. They both loved the plot, no matter how predictable it was, the characters, the CGI – basically everything. They talked about it for days, got their friend group hooked on the movie too. The thought of a sequel made Keith excited. His favorite character was the Blue paladin, who was flirty and a dork, but at the same time his character hid so many insecurities and depth and Keith couldn’t help, but be floored. Lance claimed that the Red Paladin was cooler, which okay Keith would admit he was, but he wasn’t as cool as Blue. Red was too moody and angry for Keith’s liking. Lance’s arguments were stupid such as ‘Keith, you moron, he has dual swords and is the best hand to hand in combat! Plus he has a glowing purple knife! How fucking cool is that? What the hell does Blue have? A gun. Laaamee.’ ‘Shut the fuck up, he is the best sniper in the whole team and one of the best strategists in the whole military base. If it wasn’t for him, your precious Red would’ve gotten himself killed at least THREE times for the first thirty minutes of the movie.’ ‘Okay listen here you-‘_

_You get the point._

_“Hey weren’t you and Lance like, obsessed with this movie?” Shiro asked curiously. _

_For the millionth time he was grateful Shiro hasn’t brought up the fight he witnessed two months ago between him and Lance. But there were still moments where his brother genuinely didn’t remember or straight up forgot that he and Lance weren’t on best terms. He didn’t pry, but told him that he’d be there if Keith wanted to talk, like always. Keith still hasn’t said anything neither to Shiro, Adam or basically anyone. Which no matter how much the black haired valued his privacy, it hurt that he couldn’t let it out. He bottled all of this emotions like anger, hurt and jealousy. And did nothing with them. Art, of course, helped a lot, but sometimes he wished he could just tell Shiro and hear his comforting words and feel his supportive hugs that all promised that it was going to be okay. Or to tell Pidge. Or Romelle. He knew he couldn’t for a lot of reasons, but the main one still remained that he couldn’t out Lance’s sexuality. Lance, obviously wasn’t still comfortable so Keith wasn’t going to just tell shit, until he knew for sure that the Cuban was ready for his bisexuality to be known. Keith never felt ashamed or unsure of being gay, so he didn’t know how it felt like. He knew he liked boys since he was little and the fact that his role model, his brother was like him too made him braver and at some point he just didn’t care. He was never discriminated or made fun of. Of course, there were still people who were controversial, but they weren’t as many as back in the day. Thank God, Keith hasn’t encountered any, he’d probably punch them in the face. _

_However, every person was different. Just because Keith never struggled with this, didn’t mean that Lance would be the same way. He wasn’t sure that even if Lance comes out one day, he’d tell to someone. It was just two months after all. Not that significant, although those two months were the best and the worst of his life._

_So Keith simply murmured a silent ‘yeah’ and kneeled next to Kosmo who was eating his food. He ran his fingers through his thick and soft fur._

_“Aren’t you going to watch it then?” Shiro finished his coffee and washed his cup. He grabbed the plate and took himself a little pile of pancakes. He grabbed some jam and sat himself on the chair next to Adam who also sat down._

_Keith shrugged. “I don’t know. I’m probably gonna go with either James or Pidge.”_

_He wasn’t sure if his boyfriend even watched the movie. He didn’t know much about James whenever he thought about it, honestly. He didn’t know his favorite color, or favorite artist or movie. He knew he played basketball and that he spent too much time preparing his hair in the morning. He knew he lived with his mother since her and James’s father divorced. He just knew the main things that probably everyone already were aware of. He didn’t know the small, trivial stuff that from first sight look unimportant, yet are the best part of learning to love someone. He especially learned that from Lance._

_Pidge wasn’t as huge as fan of Voltron as Lance and Keith were, but she definitely liked the movie when the two of them gathered everyone at Keith’s house for a sleepover to watch it. Shiro fell asleep on the twentieth minute and Adam had to pat him on the thigh whenever his snoring got a little too loud._

_Shiro stopped chewing and furrowed his brows. Ah there it was. Every time (which wasn’t often) Keith mentioned his boyfriend, Shiro got this look of disapproval on his face. That annoyed Keith to no end. If his brother had something to say against his choice regarding a boyfriend, he should just say it to his face. Not to hide his opinion and throw these… ‘I’m so mad and disappointed but I ain’t gonna say shit, just because I’m afraid you’re going to throw tantrum over this.’_

_And if it wasn’t the perfect moment to finally confront the problem. _

_“Shiro if you have something to say at least say it to me. What do you have against James? I thought you liked him?”_

_Shiro simply gulped and wiped his mouth with a napkin. “I don’t why you accuse me of something, I’ve never said anything against him. I just think he’s not the right person for you.”_

_Keith got up and sat in front of his brother, Adam between them. He put his hands on the table and narrowed his eyes. “Why?”_

_Shiro looked at him. “Because I think there is someone else who appreciates you more. Griffin is a good kid, but in my opinion, he’s not the one for you.“_

_And dammit. The way Shiro was right. The way it hurt to know he was right. The way he was angry knowing his brother spoke the truth. _

_“Are you trying to play matchmaker now? Who might be able appreciate me more than my freaking boyfriend?”_

_He knew the answer._

_“Lance for an example.” Shiro calmly answered._

_Keith huffed with a mocking smile. “Oh yes. Lance. Lance Ramirez. That Lance, who may I remind you is taken, and so am I. Don’t think you get the right picture, when in fact you know nothing.”_

_His brother narrowed his eyes angrily at him. “Maybe it’s because you didn’t tell me anything and I was simply left with these assumptions-”_

_“Did it go through your head that if I had the chance or the opportunity to tell you, I would’ve?” Keith sneered. “It’s just not my secret to tell. Make as many as assumption as you want, but don’t imply I’m in love with Lance or something of the sort when I currently am in a relationship.”_

_He regretted the words as soon as they came out of his mouth. Stars, how fucking stupid was he? Shiro not once said something along the lines of him being in love with the Cuban, but _of course_ he had to go and fuck it all up. He knew his cheeks and ears have reddened judging by Shiro’s little pleased smile. Before his brother could say something, Adam apparently finally decided to intervene. He put both his palms on both of their forearms in a comforting manner. He saw how Shiro’s figure immediately relaxed under his touch as if magic flew subtly beneath his fingers and transferred onto his husband’s skin. His golden ring shone lightly under the shining morning sun and it contrasted nicely with his light brown skin._

_A picture of fingers, skin just a bit darker than Adam’s, and a beautiful ring on one specific finger flooded his mind. He immediately shooed it away from his brain._

_“You both need to calm down, si?”_

_Shiro glanced at his husband. “I’m perfectly calm,” he nodded towards Keith who was fiddling with his hands nervously, a scowl on his face, “he’s the one that isn’t.”_

_“I’m fucking calm-“_

_“Keith.” Adam warned hard, but with a soft tone yet at the same time._

_Keith simply sighed._

_His brother-in-law started trailing his palm up and down on Shiro’s skin in a comforting manner and while looking at him, it was clear he was talking to both. “Takashi you shouldn’t pry into Keith’s life and you know it. Since we’ve met him you know he likes his space and he would tell all the stuff that bother him when he’s ready. And James is a great boy just give him some time, okay?”_

_Shiro nodded. He closed his eyes and took a deep, visible breath. Then a little private smile appeared on his face and he went to kiss Adam on the cheek. Keith let himself feel smug about Shiro being scolded by his spouse and leaned his body on the chair as he crossed his arms. However, the smugness didn’t last long when Adam’s brown eyes fell on him and Keith almost shrank in his seat like he was eleven once again and both of them were scolding him about bringing a street dog. _

_“And Keith, you know we’re not mind readers.” He gave him a pointed look that said ‘that’s what happens when you don’t tell us shit’ and the black haired averted his gaze. “But you know we both want what’s best for you, especially your brother. So try to keep your pettiness and anger out of it, if you can. Understood?”_

_Keith nodded._

_Shiro got up, Keith followed and they looked at each other for a second… before they embraced. Keith melted and almost cried right there. All of these emotions he kept in himself almost exploded and his heart felt so heavy. His vision got blurred so he buried his face in Shiro’s chest. He felt Adam’s strong arms also embracing him from behind and despite all of these shitty situations and emotions, Keith happily thought that this was his family. It wasn’t big, but he knew deep down, that no matter what everything, he would be okay with people like these at his side. _

_Lance included._

_{*}_

_After his little argument with Shiro, Keith was finally at Oriande Park. Kosmo was literally trying to fly away from his leash, excited to see Molly since he associated his walks to here with the kind golden retriever._

_“Easy boy.” He chuckled as he tried to calm down his dog. The path towards was clean. There were kids with their parents and he recognized some, since a lot of their toddlers knew Kosmo and occasionally pet him. How could anyone resist his dog honestly? He found him when he was just an eleven year old kid who was new in the town. He was going home from school angry, since his rude classmate picked up on a classmate and after a lot of patience, Keith finally punched him. Angry tears were falling on his cheeks because he had to tell Shiro and Adam and they’d be so disappointed in him. Again. His school was really close to where he lived so there was no need for someone to pick him up and he remembered the road. His swollen eye itched and Keith knew from experience that if he scratched it, especially with dirty hands, it would get even worse. _

_He kicked a bottle cap on his way when all of a sudden he heard whining. Keith stopped in his tracks and looked around. For a moment he thought he was imagining it, but then he heard it again. He decided to investigate, of course, he wasn’t called a hothead for anything after all. The whining became louder with every step he took closer to the source of the sound. Keith found himself in front of a big black carton box that had space drawings on it. Keith inspected it closely and he recognized the marks since kids now were a bit obsessed with this one space robot toy with a rocket ship. Keith didn’t deny that he wanted it too, but it was too expensive so when Shiro simply asked if he wanted it for his birthday, the black haired boy only shrugged._

_Hesitantly he opened the top of the box and crystal blue eyes looked at him. The dog inside was so small, Keith immediately felt sympathetic. This dog was abandoned, just like him. They were probably scared and cold. Who could possibly throw out such a cute puppy? They were white, but had black and light brown spots as well. The puppy started wiggling its tail left and right and got up from the sitting position they were once in. _

_Was this puppy… happy to see him?_

_He slowly extended his hand and waited for the doggy to decide if Keith wanted to touch them. When the puppy licked his hand excitedly, he decided it was a sign to touch. He stroked the fur that was super soft. He knew that he shouldn’t touch stray animals since he may catch something, but right now Keith didn’t care at all. _

_“Who could possibly leave you?” Keith asked in Korean. He was getting better with English as Shiro said, but it felt good to finally talk in his mother’s tongue. “Are you alone like me? I mean, I’m not really alone right now. I’m living with my second cousin who I didn’t know existed a few months ago and his husband Adam. But this place is so new and the people are so many. I miss Seoul a bit.”_

_He stroked the dog’s fur braver this time. “I can be your family if you want, I know how sad it is when you’re all by yourself.”_

_He looked around again just to be sure no one was watching him and stretched out his hands to take the puppy outside of the box. They were a bit heavy, but somehow Keith managed. He tried to keep them in his arms, but the dog was apparently sick of close spaces so the boy left him on the ground. The puppy barked happily and immediately started chasing his tail. Keith chuckled and he finally noticed that they – were in fact a male puppy. _

_“How should I name you though?” He hummed in thought and looked around. He didn’t know what type of breed the dog was so he didn’t what name would possibly suit him. His eyes once again fell on the box that he took the puppy from it._

_“It’s like you fell from the cosmos or something like that.” Then all of a sudden an idea struck him._

_“Kosmo.” He gasped and the puppy barked once again and his tail started moving in excitement again._

_And that’s how he got his precious dog. Of course he had to be really persistent to convince Shiro and Adam to let them have Kosmo, but they eventually gave in. He later on learned from the vet that Kosmo was an Australian Shepherd. Kosmo was one of the best things that has ever happened to him._

_His dog all of a sudeen barked and Keith shook himself from the distant memory and looked forward when he saw a familiar golden retriever. Fortunately they finally entered the dog area and he unleashed his own so he can run freely. Molly sprinted towards Kosmo too and they met each other halfway, happiness obvious in their barks. Keith felt himself smile fondly, but when he averted his gaze he recognized the familiar figure sitting on one of the benches not too far away._

_“Is that Kosmo my ears hear?”_

_At the mention of his name, the dog ran at Michelle and started licking her hands that were in her lap. The old woman started stroking Kosmo and fiddled with his fluffy ears._

_“Aren’t you a good boy, huh?” He got even more excited at the familiar praise. “Where is my other boy though? Keith?”_

_Keith finally made his legs move and took her outstretched hand that was searching for him. Since she was blind, he always had to let her know it was him, not Shiro or someone else. Shiro had mentioned before that he met Michelle, but was surprised when he learned she knew Keith too._

_The Korean gently took her hand. “Hey Michelle. Long time no see.”_

_When the woman got her affirmation, he took her hand from his grasp and patted the seat next to her. Keith sat next to her and started twisting Kosmo’s leash in a circle. “That’s right young man, it felt like you were avoiding me.”_

_“I could never. There was just a lot of work it had to be done. There is also a lot of going on with my personal life and I just didn’t have the energy to come here with Kosmo, you know?” He rubbed the back of his neck in shame and he hoped Michelle caught onto his tone that he was genuinely sorry._

_She only snorted and touched his knee in a comforting manner. “I’m only kidding, I know how busy you are sweetie. And the fact that you’re working so hard for your dreams is nothing but… admirable in my eyes.”_

_There was silence before the brown skinned woman let out yet another snort and just seconds later, both of them were laughing like crazy._

_“Ugh Michelle what did I tell you about making blind jokes?” Keith managed to say between his laughs._

_“Shush now, my kids are enough, I don’t need you to lecture me.”_

_“Ah yes, how are Alicia and Thomas by the way?”_

_“Good, good. Alicia got her promotion and she and the kids will finally move closer to me. And Thomas went on a date with some lad, but I don’t know… he didn’t sound promising to me if you ask me.” She shrugged and fixed her sunglasses._

_“No one sounds promising to you ever. You’re like the most and least judgmental person I’ve ever met.”_

_Her response was a scoff. “Hell yeah, if it’s about my boy, of course imma be on sight.”_

_“Michelle-“_

_“Which brings me to you. How’s your boyfriend? And I mean the nice one I liked, not the other one who took you on a date.” Her tone was sassy and dismissive as if she knew Keith knew about who she was talking about. Michelle knew about Lance and Keith’s crush on him since that’s all he talked about whenever he met up with her. Of course she didn’t know about their time messing around, but she definitely knew Keith liked his best friend. Perhaps she was the only one who knew and the black haired wanted it to stay this way. However, he decided to ignore her implications about Lance. _

_“James is okay. Our relationship is nice, I like him.”_

_“Mmmm…”_

_“What?” Keith asked with furrowed eyebrows. Was he getting another complaint about his choice regarding a partner? Twice a day even?_

_“Nothing I just told you. I like Lance more than this James.” Distaste was caught in her voice when she mentioned James’s name._

_“Michelle, you don’t even know them.”_

_“No, I don’t. However I _do_ know how you sound whenever you talk about both of them. And let me tell you,” she patted his knee, “you sound a hell lot of different.”_

_Keith sighed._

_A comfortable silence fell on them. Sometimes they talked, sometimes they didn’t. It seemed Michelle enjoyed quite much his quiet personality. She never complained whenever he wasn’t in the mood to talk and he appreciated it a lot. Molly and Kosmo were playing with another dogs their sizes, their owners kneeling and petting them both. His dog quite liked the attention. Whenever Lance came over he’d get all pampered with sweets, lots of scratches, cuddles and praises. It always made Keith’s heart hurt in a good way. It was almost as if he was a single dad and the Cuban was the only one who made efforts to get to know him _and_ his kid. It was absurd of course and okay Keith really needed to stop watching these sappy romantic movies. He closed his eyes and let his head fall back on the bench behind him. The sun didn’t let him have his comforting blackness and he huffed annoyingly. He crossed his arms and opened his eyes again. He looked on his side and noticed that Michelle was tracing her thumb over her bracelet that looked so worn out, Keith feared it may actually fall off at any moment. It was just two cloths in two colors in a knot. Orange and yellow. The black haired always wondered about it and what was the meaning behind it. The woman beside him seemed like she took comfort in it and touched it like it was some kind of lucky charm. Or was it a nervous tick maybe? Whatever. He was a bit afraid to ask since it probably meant a lot to her if after all these years she hasn’t taken it off. Plus he simply didn’t want to overstep. He cleared his throat._

_“Yes?” Michelle perked immediately yet her tracing didn’t stop._

_He felt a confused scowl appearing on his face. “What?”_

_“You always do that fake ‘clearing my throat’ thing when you have something to say, but too afraid or too uncomfortable to ask.” She simply explained._

What the fuck?

_He gaped at her in shock for a bit. Did she really know him that well? That was so… unexpected? He never realized that after so much time spent together she’d know his habits or way of talking and even remembered when he used them despite his lack of knowledge from his side. _

_He puffed quietly. “You sound like Lance.”_

_She raised an eyebrow. “Oh so that boy is also incredibly meticulous too? He is definitely the one I’m rooting for. Team Lance WOOOOO!” She pumped her fist in the air and her ‘woo’ was so loud, people turned their heads curiously at them. Keith averted his head on the side from shame, but still giggled at Michelle’s antics._

_When she finally calmed down from her outburst, Keith decided to fuck it and finally ask the question he’s been dying to ask for a long time. “I just wanted to… to you know ask about that bracelet you’re always touching.”_

_Michelle’s only answer was to smile fondly as she probably reminisced everything about it. At first she didn’t answer right away so Keith left her to gather her thoughts or to simply let her know he wasn’t pushy about the answer. He gathered his legs and crisscrossed them on the bench. He put his elbow on his thigh supported his head on the palm of his hand as he worriedly searched for the familiar big ball of white fur. He found Kosmo and Molly laying on the ground comfortably letting the sun warm them, while a little chihuahua was barking at them. His dog remained unfazed and that’s what it made it hilarious. It kind of reminded him of the nerdy arguments Pidge and Hunk had. Whenever they disagreed about something scientific or whatever of the sort (honestly Keith always stopped listening whenever the one of them started with a ‘nah uh’ because it was always too mumbo jumbo for his brain), Pidge would never give a shit about her small size and attack Hunk with facts and arguments. And Hunk, like the steady rock he was, remained calm and peaceful as he explained his own points with a poker face. _

_He was getting kind of sleepy under the sun too when his phone in his jacket buzzed. He took it from his pocket and looked he had a message from James. He inhaled deeply. _

**james ** **🏀**

heya you want to hang out for lunch? we could go on a movie or something

_He looked at the time. 10:54AM. _

_‘But it was a Saturdayyyy?’ Keith whined internally like some kid. Boyfriends were a weekly thing. In the Saturdays he always got to chill in home, probably draw and paint. Curl up on the couch and watch something. Go with his hoverbike somewhere and be alone. No matter how many times he had tried to explain to his boyfriend he preferred to be alone on the Saturdays, he didn’t get it. Hell, even Lance and his other friends knew he usually didn’t want to be bothered unless it was something really important or it was a day where he actually wanted to go out. James jokingly insisted that Keith simply didn’t want to deal with him on the free days from school. On that Keith fake laughed, but oh boy, how true that was._

_Ugh, there was that guilt again. Griffin wasn’t a bad guy, in fact he was actually really nice despite his face that was usually a bit emotionless or stoic. Yes he was bit boring maybe, and kind of a stuck up, but it was okay. It wasn’t something he couldn’t handle. Although it was wrong of him to think of his boyfriend as a chore, rather than a person he should look up to seeing. He just couldn’t help his feelings. _

‘Would you mind if it was Lance then huh?’

_Gods, it was as if a devil was a sitting on his shoulder and never failed to remind him about his crush on Lance that would never be required._

_It was okay though. After at least a month James would finally get on that Keith wasn’t worth his time and they’d break up. He shouldn’t look up that too, should he? He wanted to punch himself so bad. What a trash he was. Liking a person who was taken and in his desires to forget said person, he starts dating another one. Basically he was leading James on. He really has to get his head out of his ass and just to call it off, huh? Maybe tomorrow? Next week? He’d have to ask Shiro when the team has a game so he wouldn’t break James’s heart right before it. Now that would be shitty. _

_The fact he’s thinking this. Just give him an award honestly._

_‘_And the winner for garbagestiest person for this year goes to Keith Kogane!’

‘Thank you, thank you. Really I wouldn’t succeed if it wasn’t for the trauma in the past and the fact I couldn’t be like the normal people and get over my unbearable crush on my best friend and decided to lead on another guy. Please applause Lance and his perfect, and beautiful, and smart, and amazing girlfriend that it is totally better than me-_“_

_His phone buzzed again._

**james ** **🏀**

Lotor is hosting a party tonight so after the movie we should go

_Was that guy on something? Party? On Saturday? Was he serious? Him? Keith? Heck he didn’t even agree to the movie date!_ _He appreciated good parties once in a while, but holy shit did James know him at all?_

‘Maybe it’s because you don’t let him to know you dumbass.’

_Okay fair, but it’s not like it is unknown to people he’s not exactly a social butterfly. Shit, even on their first date, two months ago, Keith definitely made sure to let his boyfriend know that he was an introvert and wasn’t a big fan of parties. _

nope. you know I don’t get out much on parties

_He hoped his response wasn’t too rude, but oh well. It is what it is._

_He glanced at Michelle. Her fond smile was gone, but her expression was relaxed. Maybe she was asleep?_

_“Uhh Michelle..?” He touched her carefully on the shoulder and she jumped slightly, obviously startled._

_“Ahh sorry, my boy, I got caught up in my memories a bit too much, you know how it is.”_

_He retreated his hand. He checked the message box he had with James and when he saw it wasn’t seen yet, he locked his phone. He angled his body so he could have Michelle’s full attention despite the fact she couldn’t see and know._

_“This bracelet is…” With hesitation she took it off and searched for his hand. Keith took her hand in his and she gently let go of it. It was at that moment, as the bracelet fell on his hand, Keith realized that in fact those were two cut off shoe laces that were braided. _

_Huh, so it wasn’t just some simple cloth as he first thought. _

_“This bracelet is very important to me. When I was your age, maybe a bit older, I don’t really remember anymore,” she laughed at herself, however Keith remained silent, “way back before I went blind. I was in love with this one girl from my neighborhood. Of course back then it was dangerous for people to be with people of the same sex. I was unlucky in terms of love. I always was the one who fell head over for heels for people who didn’t want me or simply were afraid to. Was it the white rich boy who moved from California, or the boy whom didn’t like girls, or the girl who kissed me and then told anyone the day after I was a ‘filthy lesbian’? It was always an end road for me. I started asking myself ‘Is it me? Is it something in me that people don’t like, am I that unattractive? Why don’t people love me?’… But you know what? I didn’t give up. No matter how failed attempts I had, not once I gave up at pursuing the people I loved.”_

_At some point Keith had gripped her hand in a comforting manner and squeezed it whenever he heard a slight crack in her voice._

_“Eventually I met this girl during the summer. I worked as a waitress in this one diner. There were these delicious lemon cakes that I adored, but were too expensive and I had to save money. She just moved into our neighborhood. Her name was Ashanti and she was the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen. At first we hated each other, but I think it was just us coping with the fact we liked each other.” She laughed. “She came almost every day and always ordered one lemon piece of cake. And she never ate it. She waited for me after work and shared it with me. Oh Keith I was in love!”_

_Michelle giggled and Keith followed right after. _

_“I was in love and she was too and for the first time I told myself ‘Shit maybe I do have a chance!?’” She sighed sadly and okay Keith didn’t like where this was going._

_“She had to move away. To New York. It hurt. It hurt so much, it felt like my heart was shredded into pieces over and over again. My chest physically hurt at the thought. I counted the days, I cried myself to sleep every night. I swore to myself I’d never find and love another.”_

_She fixed her sunglasses and Keith caught a glimpse of a tear. _

_“She left without saying anything. No goodbyes, nothing. I heard from my neighbor from four houses away that she left the night since he heard her parents’ car. When I got home I literally couldn’t stop crying. Even after I felt there were no more tears left, they kept falling again. I was so heartbroken. It hurt to breathe.”_

_“One week later, however I received a small package from New York on my door. I opened it and there were two shoe laces.” She lifted his hand to emphasize. “The one I immediately recognized since I met her when I had my shoes on with the orange laces. And she sent me hers – which were yellow since it was also my favorite color. We remembered since on our first meeting we argued and I was so angry I pointed out her shoe laces which were absolutely no way in the topic, but it made her laugh so it was worth it at the time.”_

_Keith smiled. She squeezed his hand. “I haven’t seen or heard of her since then. I don’t know what happened to her. Sometimes I wonder if she remembers me or thinks of me the way I do, but who knows. I met my Ron and we had two beautiful babies.”_

_In a kind manner she stroked his hand up and down._

_“I keep this _ _„_ _bracelet_ _“_ _ as a reminder. No matter how I tried to put myself down, this mix of two shoe laces always reminded me that there was someone who loved me truly, who remembered me. Sometimes I regret I didn’t search for her, or I get angry she left without saying goodbye.”_

_She reached out her hand closely to his face and he caught it mid-air. Michelle put her warm hand to his cheek and said in a quiet voice. “What I’m trying to say, regret is an ugly thing Keith. You’re always going to wonder what would’ve happened if you didn’t tell your Lance about true feelings.”_

_Keith felt his mouth open to protest about this statement, but she only beat him to it. “Don’t deny it, my boy. I can’t see, but I definitely am not blind. I fought, but not enough. But you’re a fighter Keith. Don’t make the same mistakes as mine, fight for the people you love.” Her voice was urgent and Keith was going to be dismissed if he said anything against her, “tell someone, no matter who that you’re in love. Shout it in your own way. Don’t bottle up such a beautiful thing as love just because you’re afraid. Get hurt, but don’t let that bring you down. You’re enough for every person who decides to know and love all of you. And is willing to fight all of your demons. It’ll pass someday. Everything goes, but for now…”_

_Michelle’s hand fell from his cheek, found and took the bracelet from his palm. And firmly, but gently put it on his own wrist. She squeezed both of his hands with hers._

_“Be a warrior Keith.”_

_._

_Two hours later his phone buzzed and he knew who it was. Keith didn’t answer._

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

The little kid toys sprawled on the yard were so familiar to him, he almost cried.

He could recognize Sylvio’s “alien” car that was only called “alien” only because he made Keith paint some stars and cosmic ships with a black marker. Nadia’s wooden sword and cape, with which she pretended to be either a villain or the superhero, depending on the game of course. There were also the swings that were Marco’s doing and the small painted blue seesaw that Lance made for the twins’ birthday three years ago. He was fifteen at that time, but was determined to make the best seesaw for his little nephew and niece. It was adorable really. And the result wasn’t the best, but the fact that scrawny-muscled Lance put so much effort into it, is what made that seesaw special.

The little tree that the Ramirez planted on ‘Green day’ last year was slowly growing. It was hilariously small if you put it next to the big walnut tree that grew at the backyard. The Ramirez weren’t poor by any means since most of the money came from Lance’s dad fortune. Lance didn’t tell him much and frankly didn’t talk about him often. But from what Keith knew the Cuban’s dad was really rich and after his mysterious death all of Mateo Ramirez’s fortune was apparently left for his family. And it was a lot. That’s why Lance’s family moved from Cuba to the States. They bought a new house since the last one was too small. And here they were.

After Keith’s fight with Lance he didn’t dare to pass through that side of the neighborhood in fears of meeting the blue eyed boy. He was a bit ashamed since that also meant the rest of the Ramirez members. Which was a bummer because Keith loved all of them and it hurt his heart not seeing them or talking to them for nearly two months.

However it was all game over today. Michelle sparked something in him and what he was doing today was dangerous, but he didn’t care. He was doing this, today and now.

He skipped the little three stairs and finally he was face to face with the painfully familiar white door. Keith closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

_You can do this._

He really hoped whoever he was looking for answered the door instead of Lance. Although he made sure not three but _four_ times that Lance was probably out with Allura or Pidge and Hunk or whoever. Which meant stalking his story on Instagram. He saw Lance was in the basketball court in the Kral Zera complex. He posted the picture ten minutes ago and from Kral Zera to here was easily half an hour with the bus. That is if Lance didn’t drive with his mom’s car. Then Keith was truly screwed. Wait, he knew the password of the garage maybe he could just check-

_No. Stop. You’re distracting yourself. Just do it._

He heard sound from the inside. Rarely the Ramirez house was quiet honestly so Keith probably had to knock a bit harder. Slowly he raised his hand and firmly knocked on the door. He didn’t wait for more than fifteen seconds (No, Keith did _not_ count, thank you) before the door opened. Confusion erupted immediately when no one appeared in his line of vision, but before he could question his sanity he looked down to find an adorable face with big blue eyes peaking up at him. Nadia.

“KEEEEEIIIIITHHH!” The little eight year old immediately latched onto him and wrapped her little hands around his torso and started jumping up and down. “KEITH I MISSED YOU SO SO SO SO SO SO MUCH, TIO LANCE SAID YOU HAVE TOO MUCH WORK AND THAT’S WHY YOU COULDN’T VISIT US, BUT THEN I SAID ‘THAT’S STUPID TIO, KEITH ALWAYS HAS TIME FOR US’ BUT THEN HE SAID THAT YOU ALSO HAVE A BOYFRIEND AND I WAS SAD ‘CUZ YOU DIDN’T TELL ME AND I MISSED DOING YOUR HAIR AND SYLVIO MISSES YOUR ALIEN STORIES AND KEITH I DID A DRAWING OF NESSIE AND BIG FOOT BECAUSE I KNOW YOU LOVE THEM AND-“

Wow the blabbering when excited or nervous really was in the genes, wasn’t it? How did she breathe? Phew. The magic of DNA.

“Woah calm down a bit princess!” He chuckled, his heart warming up already. God he missed that cute little girl. Keith reached down and gathered Nadia in his arms hoisting her up on his hip. This time she wrapped her hands around his neck so hard, he stumbled a bit. He entered, but turned around and closed the door.

He took of his shoes and finally entered the house truly and he breathed around in the familiarity of the house. The huge sofa in the middle of the living room and the big TV in front of it. The kitchen that was in one with it and the long table on which all of the ten members of the family could sit comfortably without bumping too much with each other. A luxury that wasn’t available in their old house judging by Lance’s words. The second floor that contained all of the rooms for all of them. The bathroom that was open, the sound of the TV, the smell of tea, the scent that was just… so comforting. This house was like his own. Not that he didn’t love his own home, but Keith has always wanted a big family since he was a kid and the fact that the Ramirez accepted him so easily and considered him a part of it always left him giddy and dizzy with happiness and love.

_Yeah but you haven’t acted as a part of the family lately have you?_

Keith shook himself mentally from the negative thoughts and looked around, searching for one specific person.

He looked on his right. Nadia looked peaceful and was tugging and twisting gently on his ponytail. Her chubby cheek was charmingly squished against his shoulder and _shit_ at times like this her resemblance with her father and twin brother really showed. He could even see some of Lance and Luna in her. He softly addressed the girl in his arms. “Hey 공주님 (_princess_)?”

Her eyes glanced at him and he had to restrain himself _not_ to coo at the sight. Her eyes were the exact same shade of blue Lance and Luna had. It wasn’t exactly pastel blue, it was more like sapphire, but lighter? Kind of like the sky at night after dawn. Dark blue, but not exactly. Ugh. These damn eyes. Why did their entire family have such good genes? It was frustrating. “Where’s your grandma?”

Nadia lifted her head and looked towards the kitchen. “Sylvio was playing football, but he broke something I think. It’s just me, _hermano_, _abuela _and_ bisabuela_ today. Papa and Mama go with the car to the supermarket, _Tio_ Marco go to train his muscles,” she flexed her little arm, probably copying what Marco said and did before he left and Keith chuckled, “_Tio_ Lance plays basketball and _Tias _Veronica and Rachel go to the mall for new clothes. And _bisabuela_ sleeps.” She furrowed her eyes. “I hope.”

Yes _bisabuela_ Valentina was famous for her sleeping very… _very _still everywhere, whenever she got tired. Keith honestly thought once (in the beginning of his friendship with Lance, now he was used to this) she wasn’t … alive, but Rachel assured him not looking up from her phone that this happened all the time. So yeah, _bisabuela _definitely had a reputation.

“Umm okay Nadia, but I asked where abuela was, _not_…” he sighed but with a smile, “the whole family.”

“She is probably in the backyard arguing with Sylvio or doing the garden or something.” She shrugged and struggled herself so Keith could let her down on the ground.

She ran towards the TV and he finally noticed all of the pencils, papers that were all drawn on, the toys like cars and dolls. Nadia grabbed her backpack and looked in it, obviously searching for something. She gasped in delight and pulled out a big yellow folder with flowers on it. She sat herself on the fuzzy carpet and opened it carefully. Keith crossed his arms and smiled amusedly at the little girl. While she was searching, Keith stepped around to look at the window leading towards the backyard. His heart started beating quickly when he caught a glimpse of Luna Castillo herself. Gods, he was so nervous. Maybe this was a bad idea? Yes it was a bad idea, but it was too late. He was here now and there was no turning bad now. He wasn’t a coward. He was Akira Kogane god fucking _dammit_!

He felt a tug on his jacket and he looked down to see Nadia holding something behind her back. Her expression was shy, but there was a smile showing off her missing tooth on the front. Her grip tightened as she handed him the sheet of paper.

He took it and…It was… certainly something. There were lots of trees and grass. A forest probably. The figure standing on the forest was a huge brown spot. That’s at least what Keith thought it was. It had big legs, feet and arms. It was kind of floating in the air, but there was a huge smile on its face. On the left corner, with barely recognizable letters, but still readable, was written ‘FOR KEITH” and a red heart next to it.

“The teacher said we have to draw a mythical thing and,” her grip on the end of his jacket tightened even more, “all of the other kids drew unicorns or mermaids or dragons, but I remember when you told me about Big Foot and you said how much you like him. So I drew him for you.” She pointed to his name. “Do you like it?”

Her question was hesitant as if she really thought Keith wouldn’t like something like this.

“It’s amazing,” he got down on one knee and reached his hands to squeeze her. Without thinking she hugged him back and he heard her happy laugh in his ear. “I love it Nadia.”

She pulled back afterwards and grabbed his hand, tugging him. “Keith they’re playing my favorite show, you should watch it with me! It’s about these two mermaids who come from this one alien water planet and they can shoot water out of their tales and-“

“Nadia Ramirez Álvarez! ¿Qué te dije sobre abrirle la puerta a un extraño si no hay un adulto en la casa?” (_What did I tell you about opening the door to a stranger if there isn’t an adult in the house?!_)

Nadia dropped her hand from his and winced as her grandma’s voice reached all the parts of the house and then some.

“Lo siento abuela!” Nadia yelled back. (_ Sorry grandma!_)

The window door was slammed firmly and Keith braced himself for Luna’s anger. He knew she wasn’t angry with him exactly _now_, but maybe she’d get angrier when she sees him. Lance shared almost everything with his mother, she surely would’ve picked up that their friendship was cold lately. Luna was anything, but dumb. Hell, he fucking avoided the whole family, just because he was afraid of confronting them. Only because of Lance. Well... He squared his shoulders. No more running away.

Luna strolled over yet she didn’t look up. She was taking off her gardening gloves, a hair tie caught in her mouth while her huge, long and black curly hair was falling freely on her back. Her clothes were dirty and her skin was somewhat darker than last time he saw her. Another similarity between her and Lance. During winter, their skin got a really specific shade of brown. And the moment the sun is staying longer on the sky, boom! The skin got darker and the freckles stood out even more. Well, the whole family had that kind of thing, but it was obvious as a bright day that Lance took his looks after his mother. Except for her height and hair. Everything else? Copy paste. Heck, even some freckles were on the same places. The exact same shade of blue eyes, which Veronica also got except hers were lighter. The shape of his nose and mouth. The same smile and the angry expression. It was as if Lance was the only one of her kids that looked exactly like her. Luis’s skin was the lightest from them all, Marco’s hair was definitely black like Luna’s, but everything else? Probably his dad. Rachel was Lance’s twin, but they were fraternal which meant they looked more like siblings born in separate times, rather to look identical. Rachel could pass more for Marco’s twin at that point. They had the same hair and similar facial features. Veronica was like a mix of all of them. She had blue eyes, but they weren’t the same shade. Her hair was brown, but just a tad darker than Lance’s.

So yeah, they were definitely times where Keith got himself shocked at the resemblance between Lance and his mother. The reason he was so fascinated by all of this was maybe because he didn’t know his own family to compare with. Did he have his mother’s features or he took more after his father? Or maybe he was a mix of both? Or he probably looked nothing alike with his parents and his appearance was thanks to some aunt, uncle or grandparents of his? He… he knew he’d probably never get an answer but it was fun to dream at least. His dad was only around for the first three years of his life, according to the papers he read Shiro gave him, but he barely remembered anything. Sometimes he’d have these strange dreams of strong hands holding him, silky black hair and a toothy goofy smile and he treasured them most at the morning when the memory was still fresh in his brain. His mother was never there and probably never will. Keith didn’t know if she was perhaps dead or alive and no matter how hard he tried to convince himself every time he thought about her… that he didn’t care… he couldn’t bring himself to actually admit it. Maybe that’s why he always latched to people like Shiro, Adam and Luna. That kind of people that he wished he had grew up with, had spent his childhood with.

Maybe that’s why he was so scared of the thought of Luna pushing him away. It scared him and hurt him that one day Luna might not look at him in the eyes with the unending love and kindness she wielded.

Luna headed towards the oven and turned it on. She washed her hands, dried them and started tying up her hair. It was now or never.

Keith cleared his throat. Her figure froze, but only for a second, before she grabbed a knife that was next to the sink and did a complete 180°. Keith raised his hands in surrender an apology already on his mouth.

“Sorry, sorry I’m sorry I startled you-“

“Keith! _Mijo_!” She dropped the knife in the sink and in brave fast steps, she enveloped him into a hug. It was a bit painful, since she squeezed harder than he expected. However he didn’t mind one bit as he just as quickly returned her affections. He breathed in her hair (he grew up a lot since their first meeting and she was a short woman), her scent so familiar he felt his eyes getting wet and Keith restrained himself from weeping right there.

He didn’t want to cry in front of her, but apparently his eyes didn’t give a shit. And as he was hugging this woman for the first time in a long time, Keith Kogane finally let himself cry fully.

He cried for every goddamned thing that hurt his feelings ever since he argued with Lance and even before that. He didn’t cry easily and it took a lot for him to break down like this, but oh wasn’t this a huge relief! To let it all out. All of the jealousy, the anger, the pain, the feeling of _feeling_ like a complete scum because he was a terrible boyfriend – basically everything. Shiro almost got him crying this morning, but being here in Luna’s strong, comforting arms is what it took for Keith to bare his heart. He was a quiet crier, but in this silent, soft afternoon when the only sound was coming from TV, his crying was so loud, the boy thought everyone in the neighborhood heard him. It seemed the woman in his arms didn’t care one bit as she only kept stroking his back up and down comfortingly.

He didn’t know how much time passed and frankly he didn’t care. He was in some kind of trance, but it ended the moment he felt a tiny pressure on his back. He sniffed and turned around. He looked down and chuckled wetly when he saw Nadia hugging him, an unsure and sad look on her face.

She glanced up at him and rubbed his stomach. “Please don’t be sad Keith.” She started sniffling. “Because when you’re sad and you cry, I get sad and cry too-…“ The little girl choked on the last two words and before Keith could react, she started crying too. She wept while burying her face in his back even more. He let go of Luna and twisted his body. He faintly heard the Cuban woman chuckling slightly. Keith kneeled once again and wiped away Nadia’s tears.

Snot was running down from her nose and her face was scarlet from the crying, yet she still looked like one of the most adorable sights Keith has ever seen.

“W-w-why,” she stuttered and sniffed again, “why are you sad Keith?” Her sad puppy eyes stared through him.

But before Keith could answer, Luna kneeled next to him, a pink tissue in her hand. Nadia immediately knew what she had to do and leaned towards her grandmother and blew her nose. Luna smiled softly with some tears on her cheeks as well. When her grandkid was ready, Luna was already ready with another tissue that she used to wipe her face. Nadia stayed calm through it all.

When it was all done, the woman kissed the little girl’s forehead and stood up with a soft grunt.

“Ay _querida,_ people get sad sometimes without a reason. Or because there are too much reasons. And whenever a friend gets sad, you’re just going to stay beside them and give them a shoulder to cry on, _si_?

Keith got up and he saw Nadia giving a little nod. A frown immediately appearing on her face.

“I don’t like when I’m sad.”

_Who doesn’t_, Keith thought.

“Yes, amor, but how can you feel happiness truly if you don’t feel sad from time to time? Hm?”

_That_ got Nadia thinking judging by her thoughtful scowl. At the end the eight year old simply shrugged and went back to watch her show.

Both, Keith and Luna laughed at her antics. After it died down, Keith felt sweating a bit. He was still in his jacket and the air inside was warm, but if you stayed with too much clothes, you were about to get hot no matter what.

“Keith,” Luna got his attention and he faced the woman, “what happened to you? You suddenly stopped visiting and I got _so_ worried. Lancito mentioned too much work, but,” she gave him a sad frown, “I don’t think that’s the reason, is it?”

The boy sighed and he wanted to tell her. He did. He wanted to tell her how in love he was with her son and how he fucked up and how much he wished he could rewind the time and do everything differently. He wanted to just talk with her like he always did. Keith knew this time it was different, but this desire to tell someone he was in love was finally coming on the surface. Michelle’s “_Tell someone, no matter who that you’re in love. Shout it in your own way. Don’t bottle up such a beautiful thing as love just because you’re afraid_” got him thinking so, so hard on his way back home. And he found out that he actually wanted to tell someone for the first time in years probably. Of course, it had to be the mother of said person, but Keith knew she’d never tell anything to Lance, no matter if he was her son. Plus he wanted, no, _needed_ it to be her. She knew Lance the best out of everyone. Out of Hunk, of Keith, of _anyone_.

She probably must have felt his hesitation.

“Do you want to stay a bit? I just started making tea. We can have some in the backyard, if you want?” She smiled warmly at him and how could he refuse? But-

“Uh I’d love to, but Lance-…“ Gods, this was embarrassing.

“Isn’t coming back soon. He went to play in Kral Zera. Knowing him, he’d come back when he gets hungry, which is always around seven. And now it’s…” she looked at the clock on the wall, behind Keith, “five forty. So, what do you say?”

“Okay.” He smiled in relief.

She returned his smile.

.

After that Sylvio came back in the house, all muddy and dirty from playing. And just like his twin sister, he also threw his little body onto Keith blabbering faster than lightning about everything Keith has missed in those two months. He still felt guilt panging his chest, but it was a bit bearable now he was here, fixing this mess.

Luna shooed her grandson away into the bathroom to clean up. Keith couldn’t help, but snicker at Sylvio’s adorable robe. The hood was a duckling face and it looked like a mask if you pulled it down. Nadia was still watching her show, while Keith finally took off his jacket and decided to help Luna. Like always she refused any, but he knew she appreciated it nevertheless. He took some fresh mint from her little garden at the backyard, since mint tea was her and his favorite too. Of course she didn’t grow vegetable or fruits and the place wasn’t big for it anyways. But all of the flowers and herbs she was growing was really admirable. That also meant Sylvio constantly hit some accidently when he was playing football, but he probably was being more careful. Hopefully.

Sylvio emerged from the shower, but instead of going to his room to change he went to the couch next to his sister. Now both enchanted with the show of these… alien mermaids apparently. Keith could finally smell the tea scent in the air and wow he really, really missed this. This only missed the rest of the Ramirez. More specifically – Lance, but for now Keith was glad he could talk peacefully with only his mother.

Luna turned off the oven and grabbed two mugs. She poured the tea into them. Luna’s mug was one with the Cuban flag on it while his was simply red. But he didn’t mind it since that was his favorite color. He grabbed his jacket because Luna made him do it. She took off her own coat from the hanger and they both headed towards the backyard. Before that Luna made sure the door was locked because of Sylvio and Nadia. Plus from their seats on the garden swing they had a perfect vision on their little heads and what were they doing.

They drank in peaceful and comfortable silence. Keith was grateful he took his jacket since the air was still cold, but with the hot tea in his hand it was bearable. He commented on some flowers that looked new and Luna simply told him that Mr. Patel down the street owned a flower shop and constantly gifted the family seeds.

At one point though, Keith somehow felt her curiosity and wonder of why he was here now after his short absence. Or why he didn’t want Lance to be here. He knew she was a patient woman – again, something Lance took from her – but she definitely wasn’t going to wait all afternoon for him to talk. So he simply ignored the fast beating of his heart and the sweaty palms and spoke.

“I’m in love with Lance.”

It was probably the first time he has admitted this out loud. If it was possible his heart was beating even faster and he thought he’d black out from all the panic and nervousness he was feeling, but he willed himself to calm down.

“I-…“ he cleared his throat, “I liked him even before that. In the end of sophomore, the beginning of junior year. At least from what I remember.” He gulped and his throat was already dry despite the fact that he took a sip from his tea before he proclaimed his love. “I realized I was in love with him in December. Something happened and I just figured it out by myself. I’ve been in love before with my ex-boyfriend, but even sometimes I doubt it was real, true love. It feels completely different when I compare what I felt towards Rolo with this…” he took a shuddering breath, “_love_ I’m feeling towards Lance.”

He didn’t dare to look on his left. He felt as if he glanced next to the woman beside him, he’d throw up and he _definitely_ didn’t come here to barf all of his insides.

“I wanted to tell you,” he continued while he stubbornly kept his gaze on the ground beneath him, “because someone made me realize today that time is precious and we shouldn’t cage such a beautiful feeling. And even though,” gods he would definitely puke, this was one of the scariest things he’s experienced and that was saying a _lot_ for him, “_even though _I’m heartbroken and super scared, because I know he doesn’t feel the same and I fucked up a lot of the things between us.” His shaky hand combed through his bangs and the cold air hit his bare forehead. “I’m also glad I’m in love with him. It does suck most of the time, I won’t deny, but-… but I’m happy when I remember what kind of person he is. I’m happy I’m in love with such a kind, selfless, smart, compassionate and beautiful boy and it gets better when I remind myself that.”

“I don’t know why out of everyone I decided to tell _you_ specifically, but I know in my heart that you’d never tell him. I’m sure of it. I just,” he looked at his empty mug and after a long silence he finally willed himself to look at Luna, “it felt you’re the only person who’d understand me the most right now.”

There was a little smile on her face and that calmed him down for a bit. Okay, she wasn’t mad. That was good. Maybe. However she wasn’t actually looking at him, but at her little garden. Her expression was distant, nostalgia drawn on her features. Keith didn’t dare to move, afraid of saying, _of doing _something that could be interpreted as wrong. He put his mug down on the little wooden table in front of it so he could put his freezing fingers in the pockets of his jacket. The swing they were sitting on wasn’t moving, but Keith wished for _something_. He fidgeted a bit on his seat and glanced discreetly at Lance’s room. The window was open and even from here he could see the basketball stickers that were glued on the blue wall.

Finally there was movement next to him. Luna drank from her own cup and put it on the table, next to his. She stretched and he heard some bones popping plus a satisfied sigh. She scooted closer to him and put her arm around his shoulders. Gently she willed him to put his head on her shoulder. Honestly they’ve never been that close to each other. Yes they’ve hugged but that’s about it.

This… this felt warmer, more comforting. It felt as if she was his own mother, embracing her own kid because he was hurting and her hugs would numb the pain even it wasn’t for long. Luna gently tugged off his hair-tie and let his hair fall loose. She started running her fingers through his hair and it was so nice, such a loving movement that Keith felt he could fall asleep right there. All of a sudden she started humming a melody and rocking the swing back and forth softly and slowly.

He didn’t acknowledge when he started crying. It wasn’t sobbing or weeping, more like tears that just fell without him knowing. They just… fell. He blinked rapidly to stop them and he sniffed. He nuzzled his nose into her shoulder and let out a shaky sigh.

“I don’t like feeling so sad, Luna. My heart hurts so much. I don’t like it when I’m sad.”

And frankly he didn’t even realize he said the same thing Nadia said. He probably sounded like a child, but he didn’t care right now. He didn’t care about anything. He just wanted to stay forever here in Luna’s embrace and never face anything that could hurt him again. He was tired of feeling so trapped, so depended on his emotions. He was Keith Kogane. He was the Keith who always knew what he was feeling, he knew who he was and what he wanted. He wasn’t this sad, pathetic ball of mess. He had to get himself in check soon. He couldn’t afford to lose the opportunity of not getting into Altea, just because he was in love with someone. He was so much more than that.

“I know, mijo, I know. I know it hurts so much, but sometimes all we have to do _and_ can do is keep going and hope for the best. You’re a strong boy, you’ve gone through so many stuff that crafted you into such a wonderful man that my son is honored to have as a best friend.” She kissed the top of his head softly. “You will get through this. You’ll see. After all…”

She let out a tiny, quiet laugh. “How can you feel happiness truly if you don’t feel sad from time to time?”

He immediately recognized that this is what she answered to Nadia when the little girl claimed she didn’t like feeling sad.

And Keith laughed with some tears still running down his cheeks. Luna started laughing not too soon. And with every shake of his shoulders, he felt this woman, this woman that was so full of love, kindness and empathy, squeezing him harder.

And Keith still had a lot of shit to fix. He had a boyfriend to break up with, he had to fix his friendship with Lance, talk with Shiro and finish his art pieces that laid unfinished on his desk. He had so much to do.

But right now?

Right now everything was okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im not really proud of this chapter. i wanted to pass this feeling and idk if i did it correctly. this chapter was important to Keith's character because before he was really scared of his love towards Lance, but now he's finally content with it and for sure knows that there are people who believe in him and love him. he bonded more with lance's mom which is a plus and is at least now ready to actually fix this shit between him and lance. 
> 
> i hope u liked it and be ready for the langst in the next chapter!  
see u soon, love u all!!


	3. the night we met

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “No I gave it to Keith! Mama I forgot to tell you that Keith came today! I gave the drawing to him and he said he loved it!”
> 
> Silence.
> 
> And it would’ve been comedic honestly. The way everyone stopped doing whatever they were doing at the mention of his name. Keith’s name. Keith who apparently paid them a visit. A visit he didn’t know about.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im so so incredibly sorry for the late chapter!!  
school just kicked me rlly hard in the ass and either i was too tired or not in the mood yaknow :(  
BUT this chapter is like long so i hope i made up for it!
> 
> enjoy!

_„_ _ damn, baby, I’m a train wreck too_

_I lose my mind when it comes to you_

_I take time with the ones I choose_

_and I don’t wanna smile if it ain’t from you . “_

The music in Lance’s earphones was too loud and he regretted he turned the volume up when his favorite part of the song came.

Now he tried not to wince every time a loud bass or beat tried to fuck up his ears. The bus he was in all of a sudden hit the break and Lance had to change his footing quickly and grip harder on the bus strap. A girl about his age bumped on his side, because it seemed she obviously couldn’t grab onto something successfully so Lance was quick to catch her shoulder and keep her standing. He looked up to make sure that the bus was waiting for the green light and he finally let go of the girl. He glanced at her and she said something, but because of his earphones he couldn’t hear much. He just assumed she was apologizing and thanking him so Lance simply nodded with a smile.

He pulled off his phone out of his pocket and _finally_, thank the Jesus, turned down the volume a bit. He saw some messages from Hunk, Pidge and … Allura.

_Now_. Don’t get Lance wrong.

Allura was amazing. She was beautiful, smart, brave, out spoken, caring and kind and literally everything that he found attractive in a girl. She was someone whom he liked ever since freshman year and heard from Hunk that they had a new foreign student from Britain. Lance still remembered that blissful day when Allura stepped into the classroom and sat close to him. He remembered the way she introduced herself in front of the class, a huge gorgeous smile on her face, eyes sparkling with excitement.

“_Hello, my name is Allura Altea and I come from Liverpool! I moved last month, because my dad works here. I really hope I find new friends and enjoy my stay in the States!_”

He couldn’t ignore the way his heart started beating nervously when she came back and turned to him. Her eyes were downright _magical_. She asked for his name and Lance remembered stuttering, wondering if he looked presentable and handsome for such a princess like her. Knowing however, how bad his acne was back then he doubted that. He still managed to be friends with her. They bonded over their love for sport and fashion. He flirted with her every chance he had. At first it was all fun and games until he realized that he _actually_ liked Allura. Of course a lot of people liked her too. And one of them was freaking Lotor Daibazaal.

Now they’re on good terms because they were teammates, but _oh_, how much he hated that guy for stealing Allura’s heart before him. They dated for _two freaking years_ and they were obviously happy. Allura also told him he wasn’t as bad as people pursued him to be. After they broke up, Allura was really devastated and sad, but she got through it like the badass she was.

These two years fortunately finally gave him the glow up he always wanted. He got significantly taller and all of his skin creams and masks finally paid off. His face was glowing. He tried Shiro’s diet and Keith’s gym exercises and by the time when he was sixteen his arms weren’t as lanky as before and he could see abs… _ABS_ forming. He got his first girlfriend at sixteen and that was a really important moment in his life.

Her name was Plaxum and she was a wonderful girl. At first it seemed that she didn’t like him as much as he liked her, but later on he found that she had some problems with expressing her emotions. They worked through it and he was proud to admit that with his help she overcame all of this. She was his first kiss, first prom date. He lost his virginity to her. She was his first love, his first _serious_ love and he was really thankful that he got to know her. They still greeted each other and talked when they went out with mutual friends. They didn’t end with a fight because nothing bad happened for them to have a fight for. They just simply recognized they weren’t in love anymore and decided to break up, instead of staying in a relationship they didn’t want to be in.

His second girlfriend however…

Well for the matter, Nyma appeared in a really shitty moment of his life. It was as if the second he turned seventeen a switch turned on and everything went to shit.

August started with a visit from some lawyer, claiming all of the money left from his father weren’t supposed to be given to them, _his fucking family_, but to some stuck up bitch his father had an affair with years ago. For two whole months, his mother was a mess and Lance felt so useless and helpless. They had to search their house for the will they received on that day, weeks after Mateo Ramirez’s death was announced. Lance still remembers the way his mother paled from seeing so many zeroes on the paper. It was all bullshit, they had to hire a lawyer and go to the court and face that stupid, pathetic excuse of a woman. They won of course, but the mess was done and the family kept arguing so much that Lance always found the dumbest excuses to get out of his house.

Which led to properly meeting Nyma from his school. Since he broke up with Plaxum and after a lot of great performances on the basketball court afterwards, it seemed that all of the girls (_and guys_ Lance smugly thought) latched onto him like flies on honey.

Back then he was also desperate for a distraction, because of Keith and his new boyfriend Rolo. Since the beginning Lance knew Rolo was a scumbag and he had tried to subtly warn his best friend, but was he blind because of this crush he seemed to grow for that asshole with his stupid skateboard. The way Keith’s cheeks seemed to flush whenever someone from their group made suggestive and teasing comments always made his stomach twirl in an unpleasant way. Keith always tried to low-key gaze at him and his bleached hair. Sometimes he’d even sigh a bit. How bad Lance wanted to punch walls whenever that happened. And of course, the fucker swept Keith from his feet and kept him for himself.

Back then Lance tried to find excuses such as ‘I’m just worried for him’ or ‘I get a bad vibes from him that’s all’ and say them out loud to Hunk who looked even more unconvinced with every word that spilled from his mouth.

Man, was he stupid _and_ bisexual as fuck. So much denial and for what? He didn’t even get to have Keith at the end despite having him closer than ever. The black haired slipped through his fingers so quickly like the sand he used to grab and hold back on Varadero.

So yeah. He definitely needed a distraction back then.

Аnd Nyma had been the perfect one.

{*}

_The booming music really didn’t help his fucking headache, Lance thought as he sat on the couch and kept drinking from his beer that tasted more like piss than actual beer. And no, don’t ask him how he knows. _

_He knew he could just go out if the music was bothering him so much, but he willed himself to keep his ass glued to his seat, still staring at Keith who was sitting on the kitchen counter, Rolo between his legs and Keith’s fingers slowly running through that bleached and dry hair. _

_The skater said something in Keith’s ear that had Keith giggling cutely in his fist. Rolo let out a laugh too and Lance couldn’t help but think__.__ If he was (_hypothetically of course_) Keith’s boyfriend, how he’d remove that hand and let him know that his smile was beautiful and that everyone needed to see it. Because Keith didn’t smile often, but at the rare times when he did it was like some warmth exploded in Lance’s stomach and his fingers itched. To hold Keith’s face or punch himself, he hadn’t figured that out yet. In that moment Rolo leaned forward, Keith catching on quickly removed his hand from his mouth and before Lance could bask in Keith’s raw beauty, they were kissing._

_The brunette immediately snapped his head away and flushed. In anger probably. He told himself he’d keep an eye on Keith by accepting his invitation of coming to this party, but it was as if both knew it was just a bunch of bullshit. Keith probably thought Lance would flirt with the first pretty girl he saw. Which he’d typically do, but lately he wasn’t in the mood for that. Or for anything if Lance had to be completely honest. It was a struggle to wake up in the mornings some days and he kept wondering if something was downright serious if even basketball couldn’t fix this. He placed his plastic cup on the glass table in front of him. The movement, lazy and slow, which was a shame because he was an athlete for _god’s sake_. He shouldn’t be so sloppy on just two cups of cheap beer._

_He forced himself to lean on the couch fully. He tipped his head back and rubbed his eyes in a tiring motion. He sighed. Maybe he should go to home? Nope. Veronica might still be yelling at Rachel for something stupid. Hunk? Did he have a date with Shay maybe? Pidge? An option if she was still awake. Romelle was with her brother and their uncle on a vacation in France. Allura and Keith were not an option either. _

_Great. He could just lay here and sleep. Maybe people would think he’s drunk and throw up if someone wakes him up. Actually wait that doesn’t sound bad-_

_A really loud wolf whistle was heard from his right and interrupted his line of thought. “Well well well, my eyes must be deceiving me ‘cuz that for sure isn’t Lance Ramirez on my couch!”_

_Slowly, curiously he lifted his hands and looked. And wow._

_This was Nyma Michaels from his PE class. She was really good at volleyball from what he remembered. Her pipe attacks were cool and fast as fuck. Lance may have drooled over her once or twice, but hey who wouldn’t! She was tall, with light blue eyes, her blonde hair usually worn in dutch braids or pigtails, which unlike Romelle’s, hers were higher. She had a killer body, but Lance didn’t know much about her other than the fact that she was pretty and hot. _

_Nyma was just… there in his brain. In the ‘faces I recognize, but I haven’t talked to’ section. _

_And then he gets it. Oh _does_ he get it. _

_He outshines Daibazaal for the third time this month and all of a sudden everyone likes him and wants to talk to him. Not that he complains, but it still sucks that some people took interest in him, only because he made more scores than Mr. Perfect Lotoreal. _

_“’Sup Nyma.” He rose an eyebrow. “Can I help you with something?”_

_She smirked and made her way towards him. She propped herself on the back of the couch, her thigh close to his face. His eyes followed the movement and he now just noticed she was wearing a yellow crop top and ripped, short jeans that looked really good on her. Her eyes and the mischief in them was visible even more than ever. Her hair was done in a high ponytail and even though she was sweaty from either the dancing or the summer heat – she still looked really pretty._

_“Why, yes you can Ramirez,” she then pulled out what it seemed to look like a black marker out of her back pocket and held it in front of him._

_He furrowed his eyebrows and wondered why the hell she would wander on a party with a fucking marker in her back pocket. Girls were really complicated sometimes. He glanced at her, an obvious question and confusion probably written on his face. Her smirk was gone, replaced with a serious look and woah. Did this girl change her mood like she changes clothes or something?_

_She wiggled the marker and brought her mouth close to his ear so he could her whispering, “That’s for you so you can sign my boobs obviously.”_

_Lance immediately felt like it was way too hot, even than before. He wanted to wave his hand in front of his face. What the hell? Did she actually flirt with him? What the fuck? Nobody has flirted with him in what it felt so long. Was she fucking with him? Was this a prank? It was definitely a prank. Of course, he couldn’t let her know how affected he was after such a stupid flirty comment. So he simply rolled his eyes and pushed her away._

_“Very funny Nyma. So fucking hilarious.”_

_And when he brought his eyes up, expecting a joking grin, he saw an angry and disappointed Nyma. “I uh- … what?” Lance barely heard her over the music that seemed to get louder with every second passing._

_He sighed. He mustered his most serious expression and looked straight into her big, round sky like blue eyes._

_“Look, if this is some prank or whatever, I’m not in the mood for it okay? We’ve never even spoken to each other and now all of a sudden you want me to sign your-…” he gestured with one hand at her bust, “… your boobs or whatever. Please.” He scoffed mockingly and looked away from her._

_The flush on his cheeks from her previous suggestive comment still hadn’t died out and the brunette was really infuriated with how off his game he was. He was supposed to come here, have a good time or even make out with a girl as pretty as Nyma. And now there she was, a girl that he has noticed before, thought she was hot and he was fucking blushing, ashamed of saying the word ‘boobs’ like a ten year old! How lamer could he actually get?!_

_He crossed his arms in front of his chest and he wished he could get away from here. The embarrassment was freaking unbearable. She’d probably tell all of her friends what a mess he was and no one except his friends would pay attention to him and he’d never have another girlfriend. Everyone would learn that all of the flirting and arrogance was just a mask, because he felt like an useless piece of shit most of the time. And he didn’t know how to cope with it. _

_The song changed and Lance recognized it, however he was hundred percent sure now that someone definitely increased the volume._

_He rubbed his temple with his thumb and the rest of his fingers, looked in front of him and muttered angrily at no one and nothing in particular, “Okay whoever turned up the volume is really asking for a punch in the face right now.”_

_There was a low hum on his side. He didn’t have the time to be surprised at how he managed to hear it when all of a sudden a cold hand removed his hand from his face. He followed his tugged hand and he was genuinely surprised to see it was Nyma’s doing. Lance was so sure she left after his comment, but he was wrong. Dead wrong. _

_There was this look in her eyes. _

_Something hot swimming in her gaze._

_Something like desire._

_It was at that moment he felt like someone poured hot lava inside his stomach. His fingers twitched to _do_ something, to feel, to _touch_. _

_Nyma led his hand towards her stomach and his fingers finally brushed the smooth, pale, but hard from volleyball practices, skin. She still didn’t let go of his hand as she made his hand travel up and up and up. Up until he reached her bra. Lance missed and wished for that awful beer, because goddamn was his throat dry. He tried to swallow, but it felt like someone had put a barrier in the back of his throat and he couldn’t breathe. Nyma palmed her hand over his own as he… _they_ reached to the final destination apparently. Which was her breast._

_Lance tried not to moan or do something embarrassing that would push her away._

_However when it felt like she passed the reins to him, Lance did the first logical thing that came to his mind – and that was to squeeze. _

_He didn’t have time to panic, because right after Nyma let out a quiet, breathy moan of her own. _

_And Lance couldn’t even pretend that he wasn’t hard anymore. _

_It kind of spiraled from there. In seconds she gently, but demandingly, pushed his hand away. She didn’t let go, but tugged him away from his seat on the couch. He quickly glanced at where Keith and Rolo were supposed to be, but he didn’t see them._

_Worry settled in his chest as he couldn’t find his best friend right away. But… but Keith was a grown up boy and he could handle himself just fine, Lance was sure of that. He didn’t need a babysitter, he needed a companion to this party, because he felt nervous going alone. And Lance couldn’t say no, because Lance was a dumbass. _

_(A dumbass with a crush, but he didn’t know that yet.)_

_He couldn’t, _he shouldn’t_ feel guilty, if he was leaving Keith in the hands of someone as dubious as Rolo. But Keith was the one who left him alone first so he can be with his… boyfriend or whatever they were. He shouldn’t, but he was Lance and he was always going to worry no matter what._

_He scanned the room one more time as Nyma was still tugging him away from the crowd and yet he still couldn’t identify the familiar mop of shiny, silky black hair._

‘C’mon Keith where are you?’

_He almost tripped and fell on his face when he felt the stairs, but he managed not to look like an idiot in front of a cool girl like Nyma fucking Michaels. But when he looked up, he saw her only giggling into her hand. He smiled and winked at her in response._

_They reached her room and he was immediately pressed against the door and kissed hungrily. If it wasn’t for the street lamp outside that was letting in some lightness inside, he would’ve definitely hit her somehow when he tried to undress her. _

_He heard the faint music downstairs, the familiar beginning of Arctic Monkeys’s ‘Do I Wanna Know?’ hearable from here. This song was really old, but also famous and he remembered it was one of his favorites from his mother’s playlist from music of her time._

_They kept kissing, panting and whining. She ran her hands, feeling up his biceps. He latched his mouth on her neck. His heart was beating so fast he thought he’d have a heart attack if they were keeping that pace up. But it seemed that Nyma wasn’t slowing it down soon. _

_And Lance loved it. _

_He finally felt something other than misery, sadness and feeling like a failure. He felt wanted, he felt desired. He felt like he could fly and run and jump and do something reckless. He felt high despite him never taking a drug in his life._

_And as he pushed her body onto her own bed, and pressed his lips on hers, Lance didn’t know why he didn’t have the urge to remove her hand so he could see her smile as he did with Keith._

_._

_._

_._

_._

_On the morning when he woke up naked with Nyma asleep in his arms and millions of missed calls and messages, Lance still didn’t know._

{*}

Dating Nyma was a … well, saying it was a bad idea would be the understatement of the year. At first they were only hooking up. The sex had been awesome and no matter what he said, he had learned a lot of stuff about himself during that time. It was a matter of time before he caught feelings for her. He confessed after they had sex in her car, which wasn’t as comfortable as he thought it would be, and her only response was a kiss on the cheek. They didn’t talk or text for three days until she showed up at his door and confessed her own feelings for him as well.

He knew something was wrong that day. The way she said the ‘I love you’ just wasn’t as genuine as he thought it would be. And as ignorant it sounded, it didn’t sound as genuine as his own. However the Lance back then who was head over heels over her didn’t care one bit and accepted her proclaims with open arms and open heart.

Needless to say it was downhill from there. They were constantly fighting. Either she was too jealous and possessive, or he was too arrogant and loud – there was always something _wrong_. It seemed there was no saving from the hole they buried themselves in. And in the calm moments when they weren’t fighting it just didn’t feel _right_. Every conversation, every minute and second, everything felt so forced. They didn’t last long, barely four months. Their personalities were just too different and clashed like two ice blocks. Neither of them had fire to melt them away. Lance realized this far too late. Too late on the day when they met up for the last time, fought like usual and finally broke up.

They didn’t take their differences and made the best out of them, out of each other. They didn’t up lift one another, they used their flaws to attack each other. They weren’t like he and Keith.

Not to mention that Nyma too was also in a shitty place when they started dating. Her parents were going through a divorce and just like Lance, she was looking for a distraction to make her forget about everything. They were toxic, unhealthy. In the moment they started dating it seemed like every good moment they had before was just an illusion or a nice dream. They were a mess and not in the beautiful type of way.

Thankfully he and Nyma made up at the beginning of senior year. They didn’t exactly started being close again, but at least it seemed they stopped ignoring each other and pretended that their relationship didn’t happen.

And if you ask Lance?

He liked it like this much better, especially considering that Romelle liked Nyma and vice versa. And he wanted to be happy for her. He thought about warning Rom, but from distance Lance could tell that his ex-girlfriend was definitely in a better place. And he hoped she was. Romelle was an amazing person and she deserved someone as amazing as her. And indeed Nyma was a wonderful girl, she just wasn’t the right one for Lance. Just like he wasn’t for her.

Lance was snapped from his thoughts from the notification sound from his phone zinging loudly in his ears. He unlocked his phone and he saw he received a message from his mom.

**mama ** **♡**

Mijo can you pick up some eggs from the store on the way back home? And are you still training?

He looked around for an empty seat so he can reply to his mother (plus his legs were killing him) and he was surprised to see that almost the whole bus was emptied out. _Huh_. Maybe he was thinking deeper than he thought. He sat on one seat next to window and put his backpack between his legs in case someone wanted to sit next to him. He unlocked his phone once again and answered.

yea of course and no i’m not. i’m in the bus so i’m gonna be home in like 20 mins or so

**mama ** **♡**

Okay amor

He looked to see what Hunk and Pidge texted him and Lance was not surprised that both of them had sent him memes. He fondly laughed under his nose when he watched the video Pidge sent him. Hunk simply sent him a selfie of him and Shay in front of a person dressed as a shark, crown on their head while holding a sign with ‘I WANT ATTENTION’ written on it. His best friend had written ‘you tbh’ and Lance played offended, but they both knew it was true.

The only message that wasn’t answered was Allura’s and Lance really wanted to lock his phone and listen to his music. But it wasn’t that simple and maybe it was important so he had to, no matter if he desired or not.

As he went back from Hunk’s message box his eyes immediately wandered, searching. Yes he knew he didn’t have any messages from Keith, but he still hoped he didn’t see some and hadn’t answered. But nope. Next to Keith’s nickname (which was **artsy mullet**) was the date of the last time they messaged each other, which was literally one month ago and it was about some homework or notes. It was pathetic and Lance hated how his heart still silently yearned for Keith even when he finally got the girl of his dreams. But after finally knowing how Keith tastes, how soft his lips are and how his hair feels when you run your hands through it, Lance wasn’t the same. Keith was the forbidden fruit he sworn to himself not to taste, but did anyways.

Did he need Allura the same way he needed Keith?

He was facing the consequences of his actions such as asking Allura out and not telling Keith how he feels. He actually didn’t even expect Allura to _agree_! Hell he actually asked her out jokingly, because everyone knew about her ‘no dating right now’ policy but when she said yes and gazed up at him with her sparkling eyes Lance simply panicked and mumbled a response about some movie on Thursday night. And then they kept going out on dates and the brunette was reminded why exactly he had a crush on the girl. And yes his heart might have started beating fast when they kissed and he blushed when Allura complimented him, but… it didn’t feel right. Still doesn’t.

His brain was always wandering in the wrong directions. Thoughts like ‘_I wish Keith watched this with me_’, ‘_Keith would’ve loved this_’, ‘_Man, Keith was probably going to laugh at this if he saw it_’ flood like a tidal wave in his mind and he didn’t have a dam to stop them.

And he hated it. He hated that his thoughts didn’t slow down, Lance hated he couldn’t stop thinking of Keith even when he had Allura’s hand in his.

And on the contrary he should _stop_. Because Keith had a boyfriend and it was fucking James who never seemed to stop bragging about Keith on practices. It drove Lance nuts and made him want to punch his teammate in the face. But that wouldn’t be approved of Shiro and they weren’t living in the middle ages so Lance tried to behave at most times. And the boy hated how he learned stuff about Keith, things he did from _James_. Because they were Lance and Keith. Keith and Lance. Lance was… is Keith’s best friend. They were best friends and they knew what was going on in each other’s lives and helped each other. Lance hated how he learned about Keith’s day or Keith’s opinion on some movie from no other, but his pompous boyfriend. _Lance_ was supposed to know this.

‘_It’s that or you’re either too jealous that someone has his full attention other than you._’

Lance scratched his forehead and finally dared to see Allura’s texts.

**princess ** **✨**

4:43PM

Today I was wondering if we should watch that scary ghost movie you kept talking about

It sounds fun !!

5:22PM

Ik you’re training but look at this cat that kept following me and dad on the way back home, LANCE LOOK HOW ADORABLE SHE IS

[_image sent_]

6:10PM

Btw I bought this new mask I mentioned you needed for that pimple that grew on your cheek last week. Smells like puke, but I figured you wouldn’t care

The pimple was really gross, it felt like it was staring right into my soul lmao

6:44PM

I assume you’re done with training?

And of course now he felt like the worst boyfriend possible and an asshole. He had such an amazing, caring girlfriend that was funny and had the same interests as him, but he was too much of an idiot to even look her in the eyes and tell her the truth. The truth that he wasn’t in love with her. The truth that he was in love with Keith. He groaned silently. After he collected himself mentally he started answering.

okay first of all hell yes we def watch that shit, I told u its cool ;))

second that cat is absolutely mcfreaking cute and I know damn well if alfor wasn’t allergic u would’ve adopted all the street cats in the neighborhood

and third that’s so cute thanks bby :*

(p.s. don’t talk ab my pimples like that they can hear u L)

and yep, omw to home

He didn’t wait long for her response.

**princess ** **✨**

To this day I wonder why I was cursed with a father who’s allergic to cats

Babe with the way that pimple was so big, she can definitely hear me lol

me and my pimple are offended

also how tf u’d know it’s a she

are u misgendering

**princess ** **✨**

I know damn well it’s a she since she’s a drama queen

Just like her owner

They grow so fast :’)

allura don’t u dare

**princess ** **✨**

LITERALLY LMAOOOOO

I’m blocking you

**princess ** **✨**

Ok

He tried not to laugh out loud and that was definitely difficult than he thought at first. The bus stopped and Lance smiling, looked calmly on his right.

That’s when he noticed that this was his stop. His eyes almost fell out of their place. He was faster than a lightning at grabbing his backpack and almost tripping himself on the way out, but not before he yelled out a quick thank you to Johnny, the driver.

“You got it Lance! Next time don’t let your head wander too high!”

And before Lance could respond, the doors closed and the bus went on its way. Lance laughed to himself. If it wasn’t for Johnny he didn’t know how many times he would’ve missed his stops.

His phone ringed again and Lance looked at the screen lightning up from another message sent by Allura.

**princess ** **✨**

Jk I love you. Text me when you’re home <3

{*}

The perks of being so charming, extroverted, handsome and other great positive traits Lance had that he couldn’t remember at the moment – were a lot. He got a lot of free food from other neighbors, presents on his birthday and Christmas and before, when he was still single, lots of settings up. He had hooked up once with this girl Tina that was the granddaughter of Mrs. Carter that lived at the end of the neighborhood. Mrs. Carter set them up on a date at some coffee shop and they had a great time. On the second date they went bowling, but when Tina had driven them home and proposed to make out until her grandma comes home – it kind of escalated from there. He thought she was sweet and amazing, but she wasn’t exactly his type. They didn’t hook up again, but it seemed it didn’t bother either of them since they stayed friends and still greeted each other.

So yeah. As Lance said – lots of perks.

However as the seventh person that stopped him to talk, Lance was sure he was going to lose his fucking mind. It was literally a ten minute walk from his bus stop to the supermarket to home altogether. TEN. Yet, it looked like Lance wasn’t coming home to his family with the goddamn eggs soon. Just when he thought he was finally from Anya and her very… _very_ energetic kids, Mr. Tom Collins who looked roughly seventy, stopped him and slapped his cheeks in a greeting. Lance hoped Tom was going to leave it at that and go on his way, but the man was extremely eager to tell him about the latest rugby game. Lance didn’t even _watch_ rugby! Didn’t the whole neighborhood know already that he was playing _basketball_?!

However, as polite as ever and just how his mother taught him, Lance kept nodding and smiling at Tom’s expressiveness. The man was adorable and nice, really, but Lance wanted to go home. Marco was back home after so long and he’d be going away next week and every second he was wasting away could’ve been spent with his brother. And the Ramirez household was always the brightest and warmest when all of the members were in it.

“-and then me and Katy saw Keith with his doggy heading to Oriande Park and he seemed so in thought you’d think that scowl was there between his eyebrows in the womb.” He laughed loud at his own joke, voice all scratchy and hoarse from all the cigarettes Lance saw him consuming.

“Oh you’ve seen Keith?” He immediately joined in the conversation when he had heard Keith’s name. So what? He couldn’t help it.

And if it looked suspicious, Tom didn’t comment or in it. Or maybe he didn’t notice anything at all.

“Yeah! It was early, but I was not surprised. This young man is always rising with the sun. I’ve seen him jogging around sometimes in the summer. I still wonder why he doesn’t pursue a sport career he has that face and body of an athlete.”

_Oh he certainly has the body of an athlete._

Keith was just like that. He was perfect at everything he decided to do and was worth his time. Once he put his mind into it – nothing and no one could make him give up. Lance was sure if the Korean wanted to pursue a career in the sport he’d definitely make it far. And there’d also be a benefit in his popularity since he was already related to one of the greatest athletes in history. Lance had no doubt in his mind that Keith could be a singer, dancer, doctor or whatever the fuck he wanted. Keith could probably be like Barbie and work every possible job ever and the brunette wouldn’t be surprised at all.

However, Lance knew that Keith absolutely adored art. His eyes sparkled and his whole face changed when he always told Lance what new techniques he learned in Coran’s classes or while watching YouTube videos. Ever since Lance met Keith art had already found a safe place in the core of his heart a long time ago. At first Lance hated him, because he was prepared to be the most famous attraction in his first year like every freshman there was. Of course now he knew no one gave fuck, but back then it had been his dream and desirable illusion. When none of it came true he was extremely disappointed and cursed all the teenage high school movies he watched with Rachel. On top of that Keith, the new shiny pretty boy in his neighborhood who by the way was _Takashi Shirogane’s cousin_, made a cameo and he seemed to be more popular than Lance. Which was ridiculous, because he didn’t see Keith talking to anyone. Always alone, earphones plugged in and eyes glued to the phone screen. Sometimes you’d see him drawing in his sketchbook with his back on the wall so no one could see what he was creating with his pencil.

Lance created a rivalry with him that didn’t seem to be reciprocated, because after they became friends Keith told him he didn’t notice him much. Which hurt Lance’s ego, but not that much.

The thing that made them become friends was that Lance had some troubles at drawing a fucking flower. He had the opportunity to sit not to just someone, but Keith Artsy Mulletman. He seemed to be in another world, barely glancing at the vase full of flowers that Mr. Coran had put on his desk.

_Show off._

The only motions he did was to either erase something or simply keep drawing. The only noise he was making was his calm and quiet breathing. Which was in full contrast with Lance’s constant puffs of anger, whining and muttering angrily under his noise. Not to mention that Keith’s drawing was turning out to be some masterpiece while Lance’s one was just… no comment.

At the end the Cuban huffed and crossed his arms while staring intensely at his piece of paper. It’s not like he’s aiming for art anyways! He’s going to become a basketball star and be famous and have all the ladies swooning over him. The cool guys would become his friends and invite him to parties. So yeah not being able to draw wasn’t a big deal as long as he still knew how to play with a ball. He unconsciously glanced at the black haired on his left just to see him inspecting Lance’s pathetic excuse of naturmort. Shame took over him quickly and he felt his cheeks and ears reddening. All he wanted was to grab his leaf paper and hide it from Keith’s possibly judgemental gaze.

“We all can’t be perfect like yours truly if that’s what you’re wondering,” he couldn’t stop his mouth from opening before he spilled all the words he has always wanted to say to Keith. It seemed his filter wasn’t working today.

A scowl appeared on Keith’s face that ruined his calm demeanor from just seconds ago. Which was a bit of a shame since he was really beautiful and that furrow between his eyebrows didn’t suit him as much as Lance thought at first. Keith snapped his eyes to his own and maybe for the first time since the beginning of the year they finally and truly saw each other. The sun was giving the Korean a bit of a glow making his eyes look kind of violet under its light. It made Lance wonder if that were their true color, since purple eyes didn’t exist…

_Right?_

Keith stared at him for some seconds and no matter how much Lance longed for his attention, he didn’t feel comfortable with these sharp eyes staring right into him. He looked away, returning to his own painting. After that the brunette assumed he wouldn’t say anything and just keep on working. But if there’s something you needed to learn about Keith Kogane was that he always was going to surprise you. No matter what.

Lance learned this on that day.

“I was simply gonna say that it seemed you wanted it to be too perfect. A copy paste. Which doesn’t have to be case here. No one is pointing a gun at your head, threatening you that it should be exactly as it is. Let your mind wander and draw something you’re familiar with. Be creative, you know?”

Lance gaped at the boy next to him, shocked at how much he talked like Coran… or his mother honestly. The black haired did not once raise his head again, did not meet his eyes and Lance wasn’t sure if he was grateful or not. With hesitance Lance took the pen once again and this time they both worked in silence.

After that class Lance realized he’s been too much of an asshole and judged the new boy too quickly. At which he was ashamed to admit because his mama didn’t raise him like that way. It started with quiet ‘hi – hello’ ’s, greeting each other with a wave and a smile if they caught each other in public. Then they started talking more between classes and went to home together. The decision to befriend Keith is still one of the best Lance has ever made. And right now, when he was eighteen, a grown up and a new found bisexual, Lance realized that he literally projected his insecurities onto Keith. And of course, his unrealized attraction. How could he forget about that, of course.

Lance was snapped from his thoughts when Tom patted him hardly on his shoulder.

“Well Lance I’m gonna have to go sadly! My daughter is visiting me and she’d get pissed if I come home too late! Greetings to Luna!”

Before Lance could send his own greetings to Maya, his daughter, Tom went on his way down the street. And frankly Lance would usually yell after his neighbor to send his hugs to Maya, but right now he didn’t have the energy nor the desire. He just wanted to come home for fucks sake. He wanted to hug and kiss his mom on the cheek, be crushed from Marco’s strong hug and play with Nadia and Sylvio. He wanted a rest from all of the physical and mental work that both, his body and mind, were doing today.

He rearranged his backpack and continued, _finally dare he say_, on his way to home.

When this time there was no one to distract him, he arrived quickly to the familiar blue painted house. At quiet moments like these where he could only hear the wind, he let himself be a bit nostalgic. It would come a day when all of this would become his ‘_mom’s house_’. There’d come a day when he will have his own house and own family. And no matter how excited he was for his future as a student in Altea and a basketball player, Lance would also dread the day he leaves his room and family to pursue his dream.

He pulled out his keys from his jacket pocket and while he fumbled to take the right one, his eyes wandered to his right where Shiro and Adam’s house was in. Keith’s house. He stared and stared and stared and with each second passing his heart was squeezing itself harder. He even had the urge to touch his chest and make sure there wasn’t actually any physical pain. Keith’s room was lit up and Lance wondered what he was doing. Was he drawing? Painting? Listening to music? Watching TV? Playing with Kosmo? Or was he talking to James maybe? Like he did at the supermarket? Picking out sweets and snacks for their movie night? Once again jealousy took over him, but Lance quickly shooed it away with a shook of his head.

It wasn’t his business and he didn’t have the right to be jealous and petty over Keith having a boyfriend. Plus he had Allura now. He was happy. He was.

He finally opened the door with his key and fingerprint that the computer had saved for all the family members. At first Lance was against that, claiming to his mom that someone could cut his finger and use it to steal, but back then his mother patted him on the head and muttered a ‘_Miras demasiadas películas, cariño’ (You watch too many movies, sweetie). _But with time he was grateful that his mother had bought it, because it saved his ass from the freezing cold or summer heat whenever he forgot his keys inside the fucking house like the idiot he was.

He finally entered and Lance’s knees almost buckled in relief. Home sweet home.

The smell of his mom’s cooking and whoever was helping her was absolutely murderous. But in a good way. He was so fucking hungry and his stomach rumbled in agreement. He took off his shoes and jacket.

And call Lance crazy, but while he was putting his jacket on the hanger he felt something. Or rather someone. There was this familiar smell and ghost of another presence, but Lance couldn’t pit-point exactly what… _who_ it was. He tried to think and remember and just when he thought he had it, it slipped away from his brain. At the end Lance just gave up and blamed it on the light headache he had. That was probably messing with his mind.

Just when he stepped in he was attacked with two childlike voices screaming his name and there they were. Sylvio and Nadia latched onto him like leeches, but Lance honestly didn’t care. He loved these two to pieces and no matter how pranks he’d endured and whining and tears – they were always going to be Lance’s little babies.

He picked Sylvio up and kissed him loudly on the cheek. He did the same with Nadia and laughed at their ew’s and ‘Tio whyyyy’. They were growing up so fast, however that thought wouldn’t stop Lance or the rest of the family kissing them and gushing over how adorable they were.

He noticed Rachel and Luis watching something on TV that he couldn’t see yet. Lisa’s head was in Luis’s lap reading a magazine. He looked on his left and saw his mother and Marco putting on the table and talking. Marco was apparently speaking about something serious since he used a lot of hands motions after placing plates down on the table, his face missing his usual smile. His mom was listening carefully, a slight frown on her face. Meanwhile Veronica was at the oven cutting tomatoes while swaying her hips left and right and bobbing her head probably listening to music.

No one, except for the twins, noticed his arrival. Or maybe they heard but decided to ignore him. Both of which were unacceptable. So like a good boy that loved attention Lance put two fingers in his mouth and whistled loudly.

The reactions were immediate. All heads snapped to him, except for Veronica that definitely didn’t hear shit. His mom’s face broke in a smile and so did Marco’s. His older brother wiped his hands on the apron that was tied on his waist, his legs already carrying him in Lance’s direction. Lance also went to him and they both met in a crushing hug. They patted each other on the back and Marco kissed both his cheeks. The embrace didn’t last for long, but Lance didn’t pay it mind since Marco was here for the rest of the week and that was so much time they could spend together. At first when Marco left for his college in Brazil year ago (he was twenty now), studying medicine, Lance hadn’t really felt his absence much. They talked a lot on the phone, texted and face timed whenever they needed to rant about something that bothered them.

Now don’t get Lance wrong, he adored all of his siblings. Rachel was his twin and they’d shared so many things through they childhood. Even now they shared certain clothes or beauty products. They had a special bond, they understood each other in a different way than the others. A certain look or a sound, and they both knew what were they thinking or trying to say. It caused a lot of whining and demanding for them to ‘_stop doing that_’, but they couldn’t. It was simply freaky biology or that kind of crap. Once Rachel broke her hand while she was playing with some friends of hers and Lance, playing basketball with Marco, could feel his hand tingling all day. So yeah. Even though she and Veronica were annoying as shit sometimes and complete assholes, Lance still couldn’t ask for a better twin.

Speaking of Veronica. She was the youngest of them all. Meaning she wasn’t that young actually, literally just two years younger than Lance and Rachel, but the baby nevertheless. However as the baby, ironically she was the most responsible of them all. Even Luis, who was twenty eight, married and with two kids, couldn’t get at Veronica’s level. She was a perfectionist about everything – from her school projects to how she was rearranging her room once in every two months. She was on time every time wherever she went, always had to win every game and be the best at everything. But the good thing was that she wasn’t a neat freak to the point where it was super annoying. Most of the time it was actually endearing and useful since she knew where everything was. She reminded Lance of Keith sometimes since he also had the same ‘_everything have to be on its place_’ quirk.

Luis was… well Luis was definitely something. Luis was the oldest, the firstborn and the one who watched and helped all of them grow up. He remembered the most their dad’s presence _and_ absence. He’s seen his mom crumbled and helped her the most to stay on her feet when life was cruel to her. Sometimes, when Lance started thinking too much, he’d try to imagine his mom. His mom all alone, with a father that had just died and a mother who was grieving in pain and silence. His mom, left alone to take care of her only kid with not enough money in her pocket. Which was a shame since apparently her husband was rich enough to afford a whole island. Luis hadn’t grown up in luxury like they did in those last couple of years. No, Luis had seen everything. He’d seen the way Mateo Ramirez crawled back into their life and once again stole Luna Carillo’s heart. Luis had seen the way their father stayed long enough for he and his mother to have another four kids. (Three since they probably didn’t expect twins.) Luis was the only one who remembered his father the most vividly and clearest. And remembered when he left again, but this time he wouldn’t come back ever.

Lance didn’t remember much his father and frankly didn’t want to, because of all the pain and troubles he’d caused to his mother and brother. The pain and troubles he caused even after his death. He’d sometimes get a déjà vu or remember something that he associated with his father. He knew that their dad wasn’t actually the worst man alive. No matter how hateful words had slipped from their mouths in all these years, _hell_ even bisabuela Valentina once woke up and cursed his existence in Spanish, his mother kept assuring them that their father wasn’t a bad person. But Lance and the rest of his siblings latched onto the word ‘person’ since that didn’t mean he wasn’t a shitty husband and a father. On that his mom didn’t have any comments except for a neutral face, lips pressed in a thin line.

While Lance was glad he almost didn’t have memories of his dad – the same couldn’t be said for Luis. When they were growing up it seemed like Luis had taken the role of another parent and took care of every single one of them. Lance was absolutely sure that his mother had been grateful for that to this day. Luis had been the other shoulder they have all cried on. He had been the steady rock, the other pair strong arms and soft whisperings when some of them had a nightmare.

Lance distantly remembered when Luis, while holding Lisa’s hand, announced during dinner that his girlfriend was pregnant. Luis was twenty, still in college, while Lance was ten and he didn’t get why his expression was so sad. His mother didn’t look happy either and Lance wanted to know why! Babies were cute and he’d show off in his school about how much of a cool uncle he’d be. Naïve and innocent Lance didn’t understand that Luis was quite young eight years ago. He didn’t understand that his mom barely could keep up feeding so many throats – let alone a new one.

Luckily that happened at the same year his father had perished.

Okay.

That didn’t sound good at all.

What Lance meant to say is that it was at the same year all of those money went to his family. It seemed like some Christmas miracle or a God’s blessing. Lisa was already in her sixth month and often she let Lance and the rest touch her belly and feel the _babies _kicking. Oh yeah did Lance forget to mention Lisa would have twins? Just like him and Rachel? Awesome! On that blissful summer day when his mama opened the door to the knocking and revealed a woman in a fancy suit, smiling widely claiming they were rich from that day on.

They decided to let Lisa give birth in Cuba and then for them to move in the United States. And that’s what happened. Luis cried a lot when Sylvio and Nadia came to this world and little Lance was excited to also hold his nephew and niece. He had to fight a lot for dominance over holding the twins with Marco, Rachel and Veronica, but his mother assured them they’d have enough time. After that when it was finally safe for the babies, family Ramirez packed up everything and strolled towards a better life and future.

And here they were. Eight years later, living happily without any complaints. They could all afford going to the universities they wanted to study in. It was also a bonus that they all had scholarships. It wasn’t much money, but it was still something.

And yeah. Luis had grown up a lot, his light hair reaching his shoulders and he definitely knew Lisa liked when he put it in a bun. He was a great father, an amazing brother, son, friend and Lance was really proud of the man he’d become. It was just the fact that sometimes he’d be too tired to talk or play with Lance like they used to when they first came here. He missed him a bit despite that they lived in the same house, but he knew how tiring his daily life was. So Lance was happy that his oldest brother got to chill with his sister and wife next to him, watching TV.

That left Marco. Marco and him had been the closest boys in years and related to each other a lot. They used to watch Shiro’s matches as kids and yell loudly at the screen. He’d shared everything with him that he was too shy to reveal to any other person, even his mom. If Veronica reminded him of Keith – then Marco was the Hunk in this family. They even had the same big figure and warm embrace, full of strong muscular arms. Hunk was nicer, but Marco was really, really close to his level. And Lance was only saying that, because he hasn’t yet met a person nicer than his bro Hunk.

So when at first Lance didn’t notice his absence much at the beginning, he definitely felt it when Marco didn’t come home for Christmas last year. Lance was devastated when he had heard that his only ally against the Asshole Sisters aka Veronica and Rachel, wasn’t coming back. After that it felt like the Marco shaped part of his heart was growing faster. He missed him so much and his warm presence and jokes so that’s why he was so happy that he was here after what it felt for like longer than one year.

“Ay Lancito you came so late, me and mama started getting worried!” Marco threw a hand over his shoulders and squeezed him.

“Yeah sorry, but your brother is really famous among this neighborhood. I was stopped at like hundred people till I got here.”

Lance leaned down for his mother that came to kiss him on the cheek. Her hands smelled of soap and were still wet and cold, but Lance didn’t care.

“Marco’s just joking you’re coming just on time,” she didn’t let go of his cheeks immediately and let herself touch him for longer than he was used to. Not that he minded it Lance just got confused. He looked down and saw a smile on her face, but her eyes were giving away some nostalgia and sadness. Lance caught her hand mid motion and squeezed lovingly.

That didn’t seem to stop her, in fact it even encouraged her to lean up, softly kiss his forehead and whisper a ‘Te quiero’ just for his ears. But before Lance could ask what was wrong, she carefully took the eggs from his hand, stepped away and headed to the table while yelling ‘Dinner is ready in ten minutes!’.

Lance was in a desperate need for a shower and he had told that to Marco who wrinkled his nose and agreed. Which earned him a jab in the ribs that caused a mini fight between them. It was fun and Marco had him in a strong headlock, ruffling his hair until his mom yelled for them to stop. Lance huffed and punched roughly his shoulder before he headed to his room. He passed the couch, but only Lisa greeted him with a quiet ‘Hi’ and a smile. He returned it, but was disappointed that after his loud arrival, Luis and Rachel still refused to acknowledge his existence. So his simple solution was to slap Rachel behind the head and tug Luis’s lock of hair. Rachel let out a loud, dare he say dramatic ‘OW’, since he didn’t hit her that hard. Luis discreetly gave him a middle finger, careful for Sylvio and Nadia.

Lance looked at what they were watching and was not surprised to see a black and white documentary, subtitles on and a deep male voice talking about aliens. They were both obsessed with shit like that and when he remembered that this is also one of Keith’s favorite activities, his heart seemed to hurt again. On nights like these Keith’s absence hit harder and seemed more obvious. The black haired loved to come here and watch these type of conspiracy documentaries with his siblings. Sylvio and Nadia simply adored him and so did the rest of his family. None of them missed him like Lance did, but they for sure knew they weren’t on speaking terms. He’d gotten curious questions about it and Rachel and Veronica definitely cornered him somehow in school. But it seemed whatever the Korean had told them did the job since they didn’t peek their noses in the matter again.

Lance climbed up the stairs and went straight to his room which was at the end of the hallway. He shared a bathroom with Rachel, but thankfully not a room. The bathroom just connected the spaces. He didn’t mind it since as Lance already said – they used the same cosmetic products.

The brunette skillfully stripped and put all of his sweaty clothes in the basket for dirty clothing. He grabbed a new towel and his phone. He almost forgot about his Bluetooth speaker, but thankfully he saw it before it was too late. Not a good shower if there’s no good music right?

He didn’t stay long under the spraying water since he was really hungry, but the warmth was comforting in a way so Lance let himself just stay there and … think maybe. About Keith specifically. Not that it was surprising since Keith was always somehow there in the back of his mind. Always waiting like it was a stop and the black haired had to get on the ‘Lance’s thoughts’ train as soon as possible.

Should Lance reach out? He was tired of them not talking like before. He knew that after that “smooches with benefits” shit they had, stuff would be a bit different but it was getting ridiculous. If he’d known such thing would ruin his precious friendship with Keith – Lance would never in a million years do it again. No matter how much he liked kissing and doing other things with him that he promised not to think about now that he had a girlfriend.

Girlfriend. Allura was really his girlfriend. The most amazing and desired girl at his school ditched her ‘no dating’ rule for him. For Lance Ramirez. She blushed at his compliments and kissed him softly. She smelled like flowers and her hands were soft, always smelling of vanilla because of the cream she was using. Lance thumped his head against the cold, grey tiles and scoffed. What a joke.

What a fucking joke…

.

“-but then Layla said that I couldn’t piggyback Sam so I grabbed him and piggybacked him for one minute! And I know it wasn’t cheating, ‘cuz Sylvio counted it and he was there to see!”

Dinner with his family was always a unique experience. Sylvio and Nadia were always eager to tell some new story about games or a movie they watched. Which most of the time they did while yelling and chewing food. And no matter how many times Lisa had scolded them to not talk with open mouths, the little ones waited for their mother to be distracted and continued with the enthusiasm and the spitting.

Usually Lance would too tell them not to talk if they still had food in their mouths, but the brunette was busy having food in his own mouth to say something. He barely had any breakfast since he overslept a little for his date with Allura. It wasn’t exactly a date since they’ve been going together to the local coffee shop for years now. Ever since they became friends in freshman year, most of his Saturdays started with a coffee and a walk with Allura. Now they were dating so maybe everything they did counted as a date? Or not? He had to ask her.

“Mijo careful, you’ll choke with all that food you’re chugging down your throat.” He looked up to his left and saw his mother giving him a look of disapproval.

Lance gulped down and took a sip of his water so he could answer his mother understandably.

“Sorry mom I just couldn’t eat much today and I’ve been starving for the past seven hours.” He came back to his pasta, but now he tried to eat slower and more carefully. And from experience Lance knew he’d get a stomachache if he ate too fast.

On his right Marco said, “I don’t get how you look more muscular since the last time I’ve seen you if you apparently don’t eat enough.”

But before Lance could respond to his brother, across them Rachel laughed loudly.

“Lance has been training like a crazy every day and sometimes he forgets to eat in the mornings. And then when he does he eats portions for three grown adults. Taco Thursdays are absolutely disgusting. I literally have nightmares about Lance eating me like some bad monster.” She started making gagging noises which received lots of laughs as a responds including Lance.

What he could say? He loved Taco Thursdays and no one could ever make them as good as his mama. Hunk and Julio from the Mexican restaurant in the center of the city made them absolutely tasty too, but there was never something as good as Luna Castillo’s tacos. And that was just a known fact.

“Amor, speaking of monsters how did the drawing of Big Foot go?” Lisa handed her daughter the ketchup Nadia was trying to reach. A scowl appeared on her face. “It was Big Foot right?”

“Yes mama,” his niece squirted a big amount of ketchup on her spaghetti, hyper concentration on her face which made Luis and Marco snicker, “the teacher said mine was uhh original or something.”

“That means it’s different from the rest, sweetie. Did you give it to the teacher?”

This question seemed to have awoken Nadia since her face suddenly brightened, her toothy smile on view. Two weeks ago she was crying her heart out because her front tooth fell while she ate an apple. Now she seemed happy that it fell out, pointing out to every person who was willing to listen. She was especially happier when she found five dollars under her pillow. It was kind of hard to convince Sylvio to _not_ bang his teeth somewhere so he can receive money from the Tooth Fairy too, but they managed.

“No I gave it to Keith! Mama I forgot to tell you that Keith came today! I gave the drawing to him and he said he loved it!”

Silence.

And it would’ve been comedic honestly.

The way everyone stopped doing whatever they were doing at the mention of his name. Keith’s name. Keith who apparently paid them a visit. A visit he didn’t know about. Everyone snapped their heads towards Nadia. Lance felt that he had tomato sauce on his chin, but didn’t bother to do anything just so he can hear what his niece would say. As Lance said – it would’ve been comedic, like a scene from some movie – but at that moment, the last thing Lance wanted to do was to fucking laugh.

“_Querida_ now it’s not the time-…“ he heard his mom murmuring a warning and red flags and lights appeared in Lance’s brain. Why would she warn Nadia about it? Why did Keith come and for what?

Thankfully (or maybe not) Nadia ignored her grandma and continued spilling the beans to the rest of the family. She turned to Lisa on her right and patted her on the shoulder gently.

“Mama he seemed really sad and he cried. Keith cried! Him and _abuela_ hugged and cried and it was really sad. Let’s help Keith mama he knows we love him right? He can come and live here!”

Lisa combed her thin hands through her daughter’s hair, her eyes searching for the ones that would help her the most in this situation. Those were of course his mother’s eyes. She quietly nodded at daughter-in-law in assurance that she’d handle this.

“Nadia,” his niece turned her head towards her grandmother and whatever she saw made her scowl sadly and bring her head down in shame, “this was very personal and you weren’t supposed to tell everyone without Keith’s permission. Next time be more careful when you’re about to open your mouth, okay?”

Lance could see Nadia’s sad expression and he felt a pang in his chest, feeling sympathetic for the little girl. And surprisingly Lance felt anger towards his mother, which was rare since she was a really patient and quiet person. He loved and admired her very much, but he couldn’t help but feel betrayed that Keith… _Keith _the boy’s he’s probably still in love with came here after almost avoiding each other for what it felt too long. Of course, it was stupid to think like this. His mother didn’t even know he liked boys how could she possibly know that he didn’t like, but loved Keith?! It was absurd, but a part of him still wanted to bang his hands on the table and demand to know why after two months of almost nothing, he comes here and has a heartfelt talk with his _mother_. Mother! And they were supposed to be the best friends.

He didn’t bang his hands on the table, but instead Lance grabbed a napkin to wipe the sauce on his chin. Not before muttering angrily under his nose.

“Figured he’d go MIA for two months and then come here, but to talk with my mom instead of me, his best friend, _of course_-“

“Lance.”

“What?!” He had snapped at his mother, but she didn’t even move nor reacted in any way at his outburst.

“You don’t know what this is about so keep your mouth shut-“

“MAYBE IT’S BECAUSE THAT IDIOT STILL GHOSTS ME AND I DON’T KNOW WHAT’S HAPPENING IN HIS LIFE!” He quickly got on his feet, hands formed in fists and eyes glaring right at his mom’s ones. The eyes that were the same exact color as his stared back at him and he saw how the calmness and patience was slowly cracking up, leaving door for the anger to leek like a waterfall. More words and the dam would break. He didn’t want to fight with his mom, but enough was enough.

“Lance sit down.”

“No.”

“Leandro Ramirez Carillo, don’t make me angry when I don’t want to be. Sit. Down.” Her voice was slowly raising and he could see that the rest of his family finally taking actions since no one here wanted to see the head of the house truly angry. Luis laid his hand over his mom’s one that was holding a napkin too tightly to the point her knuckles had turn white. Marco gently enveloped a big hand around his forearm and tugged him down.

“_Hermano, siéntate por favor._” (Brother, sit down please.)

Lance’s response was to only yank his hand away. He pushed his chair away and excused himself while he made his way to the exit of the house.

“_¡¿A dónde crees que vas?!_” (Where do you think you’re going?!) His mom’s voice finally reached a point where she yelled and she didn’t give a single fuck about who listened. The Spanish even made her sound angrier than she probably was.

They started talking in English more since Sylvio and Nadia haven’t lived in Cuba, and that was the language they were a bit more familiar with. The rest of the family still talked in Spanish so the twins can still learn their mother’s tongue and be connected with their roots. They encouraged them to speak even if it wasn’t grammatically correct. Sometimes they themselves spoke it and the rest of the family just rolled with it.

“_Voy a visitar a Keith. Parece que tengo que hacer el primer paso para arreglar este desastre entre nosotros._” (I'm going to visit Keith. It seems that I have to take the first step to fix this disaster between us.)

Angrily Lance grabbed his jacket of the hanger and put on his sneakers.

He made sure he didn’t bang the door on his way out, but he didn’t care as he got out in the chilly night. Lance breathed heavily and he was happy to see that his breath wasn’t visible. Jeez he was happy spring had come, he disliked winter so much. He was a kid born during the summer and in a country where even the winter felt like summer. Figures he wouldn’t like the cold much. And no matter how much Lance loved the rain these days were a nightmare, because it seemed it didn’t stop pouring.

Before he made his way towards Keith’s house, he sat down on the last stair and put his head in both of his hands. What a mess. A mess he’d clean soon, but still. He dragged his long fingers across his face and groaned. The air was a bit refreshing so Lance breathed in and out and gathered his thoughts. He had a fight with his mom, which actually wasn’t really a big deal. Lance knew they’d make up quickly and leave that stupid argument in the past.

No, the fact that he fought with his mother over Keith is the thing that made this shit a big deal. Keith who came here and cried. Cried! And no, Keith wasn’t some cold hearted emotionless monster. If he was Lance wouldn’t have fallen in love with him. In fact, Keith was the opposite. He loved so passionately, his emotions were so strong and it filled him from head to toe. So Keith bottled up everything and put on the neutral face so no one could see what was actually going on in his heart. But Lance was one of the few people that not only caught a glimpse, but truly have seen his heart. He was one of the few to learn that Keith was such an empathetic person. There was no doubt in his mind that Keith didn’t love him anymore, but his actions just weren’t matching up anymore. That maybe hurt Lance the most.

His jacket was forgotten next to him, but Lance wasn’t cold. Either he was still too heated up from all the feelings he went through or the weather was just nice.

He looked towards and he was hit with the memory of his first kiss with Keith. The night that changed everything. He so wish he could rewind the time to this exact moment and never ask Keith again. No matter how much Lance treasured that memory, the thump in his chest, the goosebumps and all the tingling he felt when he pressed his lips to Keith’s, he’d still change it. After all what’s the point if he loses one of the most important people in his life afterwards?

Tears suddenly blinded his vision. God why couldn’t he just tell Allura and Keith how he truly felt? Why couldn’t he tell his family, his mother that he was bisexual? Why was he such a coward? It’s not like anyone would care, why he himself did so much? Why he couldn’t be comfortable in his sexuality like Keith, like Romelle… like Allura?

_What was wrong with him?_

He exhaled a shaky breath. Lance blinked fast and warm tears fell down his cheeks. He didn’t wipe them away and he didn’t care. There was no one else to see him breaking down like this. It was only between him and the moon that was softly shining through. He fiddled with his hands and played with the bracelets Nadia and Sylvio gifted him last year on his birthday. They were so worn out, but he hasn’t taken them off since then. Like weird lucky charms. Lance sighed. And of course, just as he made up his mind that he should head back inside, a loud bark cut through the silence like a knife.

A very familiar bark. Bark that belonged to a dog whose owner also owned his heart. And put it on a leash so it couldn’t escape ever again. Dramatic, but that’s how Lance felt how it was. No matter how hard he willed himself to move on and forget – Keith was still everywhere, in every person, whenever he looked.

Slowly Lance lifted his head towards his right, from where the sound came from.

And there he was. The best boy in the universe.

And Keith of course.

Kosmo was barking happily at the sight of him and Lance felt a soft smile taking over his features. He had missed that dog so much. He caught him from time to time whenever Shiro or Adam took him out, but never Keith. He never caught Kosmo when he was Keith.

Man, he hated how the black haired was so good at the whole avoidance thing.

“Kosmo be quiet boy what is-“ Keith dragged his eyes away from his phone screen and looked at his dog. He followed at the direction where he was barking and when his eyes saw Lance he shut his mouth. Opened it and a quiet, cute ‘oh’ followed.

Keith slowly took his headphones.

“Hey Lance.”

He stopped the music that Lance barely heard anyways and walked towards him carefully. His footsteps were light and calm and he got reminded of all the times Keith used to sneak up on him and scare the shit out of him. The memories left a bitter taste in Lance’s mouth, but he managed to nod his head in a greeting. Keith let out Kosmo of his leash and the dog ran to him in seconds, licking his face enthusiastically and happily. He was heavy and all of the weight he possessed was pressing him in to fall on his back, but that was _not_ happening when Lance took a shower an hour ago.

“Ey boy! How is it huh? How’s my good boy?” He ruffled the thick hair on his neck. “Did you miss me Kosmo? I bet you did! I missed you so much!”

Kosmo’s tail wiggled so fast so Lance hugged him and then squeezed him. His fur so soft and … smell? Yeah okay Lance was going insane, but his scent was so comforting and all he wanted to do right now was to never let Kosmo go. Snuggle with him on the front porch and be no one for a second.

“He missed you too.” Keith spoke and when Lance lifted his head he was met with the sight of the black haired smiling softly at his pet. Lance stared and realized why he’s so in love with this boy and why the hardest thing that he had come across – was to try getting over him. Keith was the Pied Piper leading Lance, enticing him with his beauty to follow him and lure him in to drown in the river.

He must have felt him staring, because Keith’s eyes gazed at him and he was so beautiful and … _soft_ under the moonlight that Lance itched to take him into his arms and just hold him close to his heart. He hadn’t touched Keith in so long, hasn’t had a real proper conversation with him and that tore him apart.

Keith hesitantly stepped forward and lowered his head. He furrowed his eyebrows and tilted his eyes on the side like some kind of puppy. It was really getting harder for Lance _not_ to hug him.

“Have you been crying?” He didn’t understand why Keith was whispering, but Lance didn’t mind, because for the first time in so long Keith was here and he was ready to talk. He was ready to listen to Lance, to be like they were before.

_However-_

“It’s none of your business. I was just going to get back.”

His tone was dismissive and Lance knew how unreasonable he was being, but hey he was allowed to be angry and hurt after Keith put him through this… this _Keithsolation_. He wasn’t ready to give up everything like that without them talking about it. He wanted to see Keith trying, he was tired of all this ridiculous awkwardness that lingered between them. Somehow though right now it felt like everything was normal again. They were Keith and Lance, not afraid of being vulnerable in front of each other, because they both knew they wouldn’t judge. They were best friends who loved each other and weren’t afraid to show it.

_God how much did I miss him._

Keith sighed while he closed his eyes. Alas Lance couldn’t gaze at them anymore, but he was kind of grateful since those eyes always managed to get him week in the knees. Lance looked down at Kosmo who was now resting his head on Lance’s thigh, his crystal blue eyes looking at him. Lance started massaging his neck and Kosmo let out a satisfied huff. Lance suddenly felt movement and panicked when he saw Keith who stood upright in front of him.

For a split second Lance thought that Keith would leave him _again, _but this time he wouldn’t come back. He panicked that this was it. No more Keith and Lance. No more going to the movies, eating junk food knowing they shouldn’t, no more competitions and smirks and playful grins, no more heartfelt talks in the middle of the night and day and no more laughter ‘till they had tears in their eyes, their cheeks flushed, hands pressing to their stomachs. Lance panicked so much he almost let out a ‘_no don’t go please come back_’. But surprisingly (or not) Keith slowly but with visible determination grabbed Lance’s jacket from his right sat next to him.

The brunette tried not to show how affected he was by this. The smell of Keith’s perfume (Keith hated how most colognes smelled) quickly passed through his nose and the familiarity of it almost made Lance cry again. It didn’t smell like flowers or sweets, but of clean? Lance couldn’t exactly describe it, but it smelled like babies did or when your laundry is freshly cleaned. It smelled … nice. Really nice.

Lance almost leaned into him instinctively, but he stopped himself before he regretted something. Before they both did.

Keith put Lance’s jacket onto his lap and started fiddling with the white hood. Messing with his hands was a nervous habit of his ever since he became friends with him. His bangs were covering most of his face, but Lance saw that his expression was sad. Lance’s hand itched to take his hand and hold it. From experience he knew that Keith’s hand was actually soft. He had some scars and callouses, but it was very soft nevertheless. It was probably from these dumb fingerless gloves he was using. Ironically they actually helped him in a bit in the cosmetic area. God knows how many times Lance had tried to recommend him better shampoos or creams, but no.

Stubborn idiot.

They stayed silent. It wasn’t uncomfortable, but they both knew there was a lot to talk about. They both knew that right now there was a big gap between them and none had tried to get on the other side. In fears of falling down in the darkness or maybe they needed to be away from each other in these two months of ghosting and ignoring. In Lance’s opinion they should’ve talked earlier, but it seemed that Keith was the one who made the first dig. He was the one who needed distance and Lance wanted to know _why_.

In a comforting rhythm Lance kept stroking Kosmo, when the wind blew all of a sudden. The breeze wasn’t particularly cold, but Lance still shivered a bit, goosebumps raising on his skin. Keith moved next to him and Lance turned around just in time to catch the black haired boy turning around. His hair was being blown from the wind and the bright stars reflected so beautifully in his eyes, that Lance had to remind himself that this wasn’t some dream or an alternative universe where they were together, but in fact a reality.

Keith twisted his body and with genuine care he put Lance’s jacket on his shoulders. But not before he also put the hood on over his head. His pale hand brushed some of the hair from his forehead. The touch almost melted Lance into a puddle. It was ridiculous how so little amount of time of not touching his best friend – made a feathery pressure feel so intense and overwhelming.

Keith’s hand lingered a bit, but at the end he dropped it away from Lance’s face.

“Look Lance,” Keith sighed as he wiped his hands over his sweatpants slowly up and down, “I was actually planning to talk with you tomorrow. To talk about this… _thing_ between us and today I finally felt ready to you know, build up the courage to do it?”

“Did my mom help a lot?” Once again his voice was cold and distant, despite that he didn’t want it to be. He was curious for what they’ve spoken about, maybe even dying to know what was the thing that had Keith crying in his mother’s arms. It was obviously about him, but what exactly?

Keith huffed. “Come on, don’t be like that.”

He sounded defeated, but Lance managed to hear some annoyance.

“Like what?”

“Pretending to be mad when in fact I know you’re going to stay here all night if it means us making up about this shit between us.”

Bullseye and Lance wasn’t even surprised. Keith knew him so well it was scary sometimes. And it’s not that he didn’t have other people like his family or Hunk and Pidge that knew him too, but sometimes it felt that Keith was different.

His heart kept beating faster and faster, to he even felt his heartbeat in his ears. He feared that Keith could hear it from being so close to him, in this quiet, lifeless and beautiful night. He managed to open his mouth and talk though.

“You’re so full of shit Keith,” he laughed under his nose but he knew that the boy beside him caught on that nothing was funny to him right now, “first you got mad for me _not_ getting mad that you ended our… _arrangement_, then you basically ignore me for two months?! I had to learn that you and Griffin were dating from some group that were gossiping in the hallway? Do you want to know how much that fucking sucked?!”

Lance knew that raising his voice would get them nowhere, but it actually felt good to let it out. And in front of the person who caused all of that pain.

“Lance-“

But Lance didn’t let him continue and let the words keep pouring out of his mouth, “Then all of a sudden, _after you’ve also ignored my family_, you come back and talk with my mother behind my back as if I’m the plague and you’re afraid to catch something?!”

At this point Lance was yelling, breath ragged, angry fire licking his whole body quickly.

“And _now_ you want to talk? After I’ve made so many attempts to go back to way things were?” He was pretty sure that Keith would explode any moment. It was building up and Lance knew it.

“No, no once again I have to wait for King Kogane to make up his goddamned mind and then forgive him like some-“

_Like some fucking lovesick puppy_, Lance almost spat, but managed to stop himself before it hit too close to the heart.

“-like some dumbass.”

He was looking at Keith the whole time and what was surprising was that nothing about his posture changed. No hands formed in fists, no fastened breathing, no red cheeks or intense dark gray eyes. Nothing. He just took everything that Lance threw at him, quietly with these pale fingers still fiddling with each other. Fingers that have ran through his skin so many times. His black hair was still covering his face, but this time he couldn’t see his actual expression.

Lance almost grabbed him and shook him. What the hell was this? What happened to fiery Keith, the Keith who would’ve started insulting back the moment Lance ended his talking.

“What now? Are you not gonna talk? You said you wanted to, right? _Then do it_.”

Oh how Lance knew that he was behaving like a major asshole right now. However after so much time of patience it was a matter of time before he’d run out of it.

His speech was met with silence. Pissed off, Lance muttered a silent ‘sorry Kosmo’ to the dog between his legs and got up. He fit his hands in its sleeves, but didn’t zip the jacket. Instead he put his mildly cold hands in the pockets, grabbing one of the coins he felt inside for grounding. Because he knew if nothing grounded him right now he’d say shit that later Lance would regret. Maybe even worse – admit he is in love with Keith.

“Guess you have nothing to say, huh?” Although his tone was bitter, the disappointment was still evident and he was sure Keith had heard it. So was that it? Was this going to be the end for them? After years of building their friendship brick by brick while Keith took the bricks of his own wall so Lance could see everything, they’d go on their own ways just because of miscommunication? Lance almost laughed.

_What a joke_, he thought again.

Just when he turned around, Keith managed to grab a hold on Lance’s ankle.

“Lance no, don’t go, please.”

The Cuban boy glanced down and his gaze met Keith’s pleading eyes. Pleading, but there was an obvious determination in them too. Lance gulped and shook his leg so Keith could get the hint and let go. But as Lance have said it before, Keith Kogane was always going to manage to surprise you no matter how many times you think you know everything.

And just as Lance was standing, he suddenly found himself on his knees. Keith had pressed a spot or did some of his tricks that he learned and used it to his advantage. The fall was barely painful, he’d been through way _way_ worse. He let out an ‘ow’ though, but then scowled when he realized that Keith still hasn’t let go of him.

“Keith-“

“I’m sorry! I just panicked, because you said it as if you don’t want to be friends anymore and I’m-… I’m not going to let one of the most important people in my life walk away before I have the opportunity to explain myself for everything I did.”

And no matter how angry Lance was, ironically fiery Keith was the one who always poured water over him, calmed him with his cold, but comforting touch. He felt his face losing the scowl and hesitantly looked over his shoulder just to see Keith already looking right at him.

“Let me go.”

“Lance please-“

“Let me go, because we’re going on a walk. You’re gonna leave Kosmo home and then you and me will chat. And this time you’re telling me everything.”

Lance was surprised to see panic appearing on Keith’s face, but that didn’t stop the Korean from nodding his head in agreement. It wasn’t often to see Keith so willing and desperate for anything so Lance couldn’t help but feel satisfied. So he smirked.

“Good. See you in ten.”

.

The sound of their steps was so loud in contrast with the silence of the neighborhood as if zombie apocalypse would erupt any moment. Which was a bit fucked up thing to think about or maybe it was that horror movie he’d watched with Rachel and Luis last week.

Lance would usually settle to fill in the silence with whistling, humming or just some kind of useless blabbering, but it was obvious that he was not in the mood for it right now. Keith seemed to have trouble finding the words judging by the frown that was sporting his face. Keith has always be the one to gather his thoughts slower as Lance knew that talking about his feelings wasn’t his strongest suit. Three minutes had barely passed, but they still haven’t said a word. It was mainly Keith’s fault of course, but it wasn’t as if Lance was keen on speaking up either.

Keith must have finally toughened up since he sighed loudly and his steps faltered a bit. Lance looked behind him and the sight of Keith looking so sad and small (which was hard to achieve since Lance wasn’t _that_ tall compared to him) caught him off guard.

Yes, Lance might have been mad, but he didn’t want Keith looking so… hollow and empty of the fire that always burned within him. They’ve had fights before, serious and dumb ones, but this one felt so completely unfamiliar. Maybe that’s what scared Keith off.

“Lance I know you’re angry. Trust me I know how much of an asshole I’ve been,” his legs scrapped the ground under him and he softly kicked a tiny stone, “just- there was this thing that scared me off and I needed some distance from everyone. And from you too.”

Not once his gaze left Lance. Lance turned around completely, his body betraying him when he almost stepped forward so he can show Keith he’d be ready with a hug.

_No hugs_, he reminds himself, _not before we clear everything between us_.

“But you didn’t need distance from James?” Lance grumbled, fist tightening harder in his pockets.

His stomach irked at the thought of Griffin calming Keith, wiping his tears away and kissing him whenever Keith felt sad. It was supposed to be _him_, _Lance_, not that dumbass that barely knew him and probably dated him just so he could show off Keith. As if he was some prize to be won at the amusement park or a shiny new toy. Keith deserved so much more. Keith deserved a boy who’d be ready to give him the world, love him and cherish him because the black haired was such an extraordinary person that was worth every glare and scowl.

“Yeah about that… I think James really isn’t doing it for me.” Keith said, grimace on his pretty face.

Lance tried to hide his surprise (_and happiness_) as he raised an eyebrow in question. Keith huffed, but the corners of his mouth tilted up in a smile that Lance barely saw. He regretted not seeing it and just then Lance realized how much he’s actually missed Keith’s true, toothy smile and real laughter.

“He really isn’t a bad guy, Lance. You of all should know that. You’re teammates for God’s sake!” Keith tilted his head up and Lance saw the roll of his eyes. It seemed that Keith was firmly going back to his teasing-self. Giddily Lance could see that fire returning.

Keith just needed a spark.

“I mean,” Lance took his hands off his pockets and crossed them in front of his chest, “he’s an asshole most of the time. A bit bossy, which is a waste of time since he knows I’m the captain.”

This time Lance is the one rolling his eyes as memories of James ranting to him about something that once again that doesn’t make sense. This guy thinks he’s the shit and his opinion is the most valuable one on the team. When the reality (not that Lance wants to be rude) is that Kinkade and Lotor are simply better players than him. He’s heard from some juniors that James had spoken behind his back, that Shiro made a mistake with changing the leader of the team – aka from Lotor to Lance. At first Lance was pissed off, but Hunk’s words ‘_You’re still the better player and the leader so his whining is just like an annoying fly to you. You’ve worked so hard for this Lance and you deserve it. Griffin is just being a moron about it_’ and afterwards James’s intimidating act wasn’t so frightening to him anymore.

“I admit that he’s a bit controlling sometimes,” Keith brought up a fist to fake cough, but he was absolutely smirking, “aaaand kind of arrogant-“

“Kind of? Keith, this guy acts like he’s some gift sent by the Gods! And I know that’s rich coming from me, but damn at least I can back up my claims with facts.” At this Lance gestured to his face with a grin.

“You literally both have the same huge ego. He just doesn’t openly talk about it.” At this Keith also mirrored Lance’s stance with crossed arms and a raised eyebrow.

Butterfly erupt in Lance’s abdomen. This is them. This is Keith and Lance. The teasing, the bickering that’s also filled with tender looks and fond rolls of eyes. Challenging and calling each other out, not afraid of hurting one another because they have figured their lanes a long time ago. It’s almost as if Lance can pretend everything is the same as before. Before Allura, before Griffin, hell – even before they started kissing.

“Oh my, mullet,” Lance whistles loudly and Keith quickly looked to the houses on his right to see if someone would wake up and complain about the noise, “don’t even get me started on how boring he is. For what do you guys even talk about? Basketball? You both having horrible, outdated hairstyles?”

“Shut up,” Keith gave a glare, but Lance could see that there was no anger, “we usually don’t talk much anyways.”

Confusion hit Lance and he knew that it was visible, however it didn’t last long when Lance finally caught on the meaning behind those words. Or what Keith implied with them. Lance mentally thanked the darkness since this way Keith couldn’t really see the flush on his cheeks. The taller boy gulped slowly and tried to shoo the image of Keith, naked Keith, laying beneath him, moaning, writhing on a bed while whispering Lance’s name in pleasure.

It was worse when Lance knew exactly how those noises sounded in his ear.

“Anyways,” Keith unconsciously spared him from having a problem down there, “I’m not here to talk about James with you.”

Keith stepped hesitantly forward, testing the waters to see if Lance would step back or tell him to stop. When Lance didn’t do anything Keith walked towards Lance in braver, bolder steps. Keith halted right in front of him, the distance between them already a history.

Carefully Keith extended his hands and grabbed only one of his own. Keith naturally ran warm so the relief for his cold hand was pleasurable in all type of ways. A big factor might also have been the fact that this was Keith’s hand cradling his, but Lance decided not to dwell too much.  
  


“Lance, I want to apologize for me being a dumbass. We promised that this kissing arrangement wouldn’t get in the way of our friendship and I’m sorry that I made you think that such a trivial thing could actually ruin it.” Keith squeezed his hand and Lance resisted the urge to bring these pale, smooth fingers to his lips and kiss every knuckle. He’s done it before, but-

He was still with Allura and Lance wasn’t doing shit until he breaks up with her at least. Allura was such an amazing girl and she didn’t need an idiot in her life who was in love with someone else. Poor Allura, why was Lance such a fucking flirt? And why the heck, after so long, Allura finally thought that it wouldn’t be a waste of time to go on a date with Loverboy Lancito? It was still weird to him and he hasn’t dared to ask.

“I-I’m sorry for earlier too. I was angry and hurt and betrayed, it seemed that we weren’t going to talk ever again. Which if you haven’t guessed – would suck so, so much.” He sighed heavily in defeat, but he sent Keith a tiny smile. “Obviously you don’t have to tell me shit if you don’t want to. I’ll be here when _or_ if you’re ready,” Lance squeezed Keith’s hands before he let them go so he could wrap his long arms around Keith.

Keith was at the perfect height for Lance to give him a forehead kiss, but he held himself back. Instead he buried his nose into the silky black hair and breathed in. Lance closed his eyes and murmured, “I just missed my best friend so much.”

He was sure Keith heard him. Immediately strong arms enveloped Lance’s waist. It even felt as if Keith was nuzzling in his collarbone, smelling him too, but the brunette wasn’t sure.

“Nothing in this world, except for you, could stop me from being your best friend, Lance.”

This time the Cuban boy was sure Keith pressed his nose into his neck and Lance shivered. And this time it wasn’t from the cold.

“And I missed you too, jackass.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I LOVE THEM SM WHEW MY BOIS:(((
> 
> i still think the 1st chap is my best one, but this one wasnt so bad either! also lance's character is so hard to write for me which is weird cuz he's rlly relatable and in all voltron i connected w him the most but o well ...
> 
> thank u for reading, i hope u enjoyed it and expect a chapter soon! love u all <333


	4. blinded by the thought of us

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance’s breaths are coming out short. James leans in and his smile is wicked.
> 
> “I’ve noticed how you look at Keith.” He leans back. “And at first I thought to myself ‘Maybe I’m just imagining it’, but despite what you think I’m not actually that stupid-”
> 
> “Could’ve fooled me.”
> 
> “-I know you like him.” James interrupts him. “It’s so obvious and it makes me sick that you’re dating Allura at the same time. You like best of both worlds, huh Ramirez? Who would’ve thought?”
> 
> Lance’s vision fills with red.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEY LOBELIES!!
> 
> i'm sorry for being a lil bit late, but this chapter is 20k words which is the longest chapter so far in this fic. i'm not going to be surprised at all if the last chapter is like 4646466487 words long or something like that. THEY GET LONGER EVERY TIME I POST PHEW,,  
A brief description of violence and blood, but i've kept it as PG as i could. But i thought i'd still warn
> 
> I want to write a few words before u start this chapter. i'm not even sure if someone will read this, but i just want to say that we find ourselves in times where it's scary to go outside and i completely understand the frustration of some people, but we're supposed to be united (metaphorically ofc pls stay home) in this pandemic time. I wish u all to be healthy and get out of this undamaged! wash ur hands, wear masks when you go outside and stay home. this will be over soon, i hope.
> 
> i love u all  
Enjoy the new chapter! <3333

_“ i wanna kiss you, don’t wanna miss you_

_but I can’t be with you ‘cause I’ve got issues_

_yeah, on the surface, seem like it’s easy_

_careful with words, but it’s still hard to read me . “_

1 week later

You see, despite what people think, Keith rarely gets actually angry.

Ever since Shiro took custody of him he has managed to control his anger much better than he used to. Sure, he’s short tempered and often you can get on his nerves, but a Keith who’s actually raging to the point where he’d actually punch someone in the face? Now _that_ was rare these days.

And it seems like the whole fucking school will witness his destroying anger if James Griffin didn’t stop following him like some idiot around the school for a millionth time for the past last week. Keith unnecessarily bangs his locker too hard and loud so the asshole could see that he’s getting close to getting murdered, but by the way his ex-boyfriend approaches, it looks like he doesn’t get any hint.

“C’mon Keith will you stop acting ridiculous and just listen to me!”

Keith hunches his backpack and takes out his phone from the back pocket of his jeans, hoping that if he acts as if James is invisible he’d fuck off. He checks the time and he almost sighs in relief when he sees it’s lunch break. Keith is one hundred percent sure that at least one person from his friend group will convince him of doing something _not_ stupid to Griffin. Or maybe they will all join him. He’ll happily admit that the latter would satisfy him more though.

He heads towards the cafeteria in quick steps, head tilted straight ahead, internally praying to some greater power above him to spare him from this annoyance that is James Anthony Griffin. Shit, if he knew how obnoxious he’d be as an ex (_keep in mind he was too even as a boyfriend sometimes_) Keith would have never accepted the proposition for a date from him.

“Keith slow the fuck down-“

He passes between these two guys swiftly, hoping he loses the asshole in the crowd. At this point Keith would rather meet up with _Rolo_ than keep on enduring this whining. Alas, it seems like the ‘_I want to break up_’ and a ten minute speech of how he’s not happy in a relationship with him didn’t do the trick for the brunette. Keith broke up with him the day after he made up with Lance. They met up in some park (not Oriande of course, because hell if Keith would associate that beautiful place with that dickward) and Keith explained everything to him, yet it seemed nothing got through that brain of his. If he even has one.

Keith pushes the doors and looks behind him subtly. Thankfully there’s no sight of that pathetic idiot so he enters the cafeteria and he holds the door for some boy and girl behind him. They hit him with grateful smiles and he returns one with a nod. Keith immediately notices James trying to take advantage of him finally standing on one place. He starts jogging towards him, angry expression on his flushed face. He doesn’t get the chance however, since Keith lets go of the door before he can get it, and watches in satisfaction as it hits him square in the face before he can react. Keith lets out a tiny laugh in his fist. For an athlete James was actually a bit of a klutz.

For a moment he regrets not being able to see if James has a bump on his forehead or something, but he’d rather eat with his friends and not think about that dumbass so Keith simply heads to the familiar red table. He sees that Hunk, Matt and Lance are already there and his heart flutters in his chest at the sight of the Cuban boy. Ever since they made up week ago they went to acting the same as before and Keith couldn’t be happier. Lance is still dating Allura and it hurts like a bitch honestly, but it’s at least bearable. Also the fact that he broke up with James played a big factor in his good mood honestly. A mood said ex was ruining with this constant following around thing he is doing right now.

He announces his arrival with dropping his backpack on the chair next to Lance who gets startled at the movement. Matt and Hunk snap their heads at him and yell his name at the same time, friendly smiles on their faces.

“Fucking _fuck_, mullet will you ever stop scaring the shit out of me, Jesus…”

“Lance you kiss Allura with that mouth,” Matt gasps in shock from his place next to Hunk who snickers as he continues writing something in his notebook.

“Yeah well,” Lance lifts an accusing finger at Matt’s direction, “at least I kiss her! Unlike you who got rejected back in freshman year when you asked her out! Don’t think I forgot!” Lance splutters.

Matt puts a hand on his chest in offense and narrows his eyes at his teammate.

“Not fair! I had a nerd haircut back then! ” Matt yells and Keith rolls his eyes at their antics. Lance and the older Holt were so alike in humor and personality you’d think they’re some kind of lost twins. Both were goofballs with sense of humor, both with love for basketball. Of course, at the same time they were so different, but still… No wonder he also had a crush on Matt back in freshman year. Apparently he has a type, Keith guesses.

Once again a proof that James wasn’t the guy for him. He was nothing like Lance or Matt, hell maybe even Rolo.

“I found the haircut charming,” Keith hides yet another smile in his fist.

Both of them whip their heads towards him so fast, for a moment Keith worries their necks would’ve snapped and kill themselves. Hunk is the only one who slowly lifts his head, a huge smile on his brown face.

“_Nooo_,” Hunk says as he starts laughing.

“Yoooo, Keith, my man, my dude – don’t tell me you had a crush on Matthew Mathematics Holt back in eighth grade when he looked like some extra from Bing Bang Theory.” Lance looks so personally distraught by this and Keith wonders why the fuck would this bother him so much since it happened ages ago.

So Keith shrugs in response and begins explaining himself, “He was cute and funny. And he also let me play on his Playstation and use his Netflix account to watch alien conspiracy documentaries. Fourteen year old Keith considered this marriage proposal honestly.”

Lance’s expression was thoughtful, but there was a small smile dancing across his lips. Matt bangs his hand on the table, his face red from too much laughter.

“Keeeeith, why didn’t you ever say anything?”

“It barely lasted anyways. Plus you asked me to wingman for you in physics when this exchange girl from Korea came. You told me to tell her she has _nice hair_,” Keith scoffs in mockery as he recalls the memory of telling the girl in Korean that Matt tries to hit on her. Her face was priceless when she noticed who Matt actually was.

“Huge turn off, Matthew.” Keith shakes his head, but he was still smiling into his hand.

Matt and Hunk laugh once again, when all of a sudden a light brown hand grabs his wrist and tugs it away from his face. Keith follows his hand and locks eyes with Lance with a raised eyebrow in question. The brunette simply shakes his head and lets go of him. Keith tries to not mourn the loss.

At times like these, honest to God, Keith misses where he could’ve touched, smiled and talked to Lance however he liked not afraid to be flirty or to tease him. Now he had to be careful with the urges he received since Lance was taken. He is no man-stealer when he knew the pain of how it feels to be cheated on. Although he doubts that even if Lance and Allura break up, the Cuban would want something other than friendship from him again. Before he asks Lance what is up, a familiar sassy voice yells out ‘_‘Sup losers! And Hunk!_’ behind them.

Keith doesn’t turn around, because he knows Pidge will eventually sit next to him, but he still brings a fist behind him so the junior can bump it. He feels her tiny hand colliding with his and he finds himself grinning.

As he predicted, Pidge brings her black backpack on the table and sits on the chair next to Keith. She is dressed in an oversized dark green hoodie and black jeans, her hair messy although there is a cute robot-shaped-like hairpin keeping some of her light brown hair from falling on her face. She tips her head back and rubs her eyes under her huge round glasses.

Keith supports his right hand on his own chair and the left one on the one Lance is sitting on. (Keith doesn’t notice how Lance unwittingly leans in.)

“’Till how late did you stay up this time, huh?” Keith asks.

Pidge groans, leans forward and brings her backpack closer so she can lay on it like a pillow. She closes her eyes, but decides to answer.

“Wasn’t my fault. I had to stay up untill one am to finish my bio project and _then,_” she stops mid-way to let out a loud yawn, “I had to be up to buy tickets for this one concert me and Romelle are going to. Bet she’ll also be tired as fuck too.”

Hunk lets out a loud ‘hmm’ as he highlights something in his workbook, “Blade of Marmora?” he asks curiously.

Pidge lifts a thumb up.

“Haven’t listened to their new album yet.” Lance adds thoughtfully and crosses his hands over his chest. Keith tries not to stare at how the muscles flex. God, Lance is getting more and more ripped with every day and Keith is helpless at how attractive this is to him. Allura is so damn lucky.

_And so was I before I went and ruined it._

“You should! It’s so good holy shit, Lance there’s that song where-“ Pidge all of a sudden looks more awake than ever now that she has the full opportunity to rant about her favorite band. Frankly Keith would listen to her too (he likes Marmora), but he’s too hungry right now to function so he taps Lance’s on the shoulder and gestures towards the food. Distractingly he looks at Keith with the corner of his eyes and nods, too enchanted with whatever Pidge is telling him. Keith’s heart warms at how Lance is so … perfect. He listens to you even if you talk gibberish, he’d talk with you even if it’s not something interesting. He’s such an amazing friend and honestly it’s a shame not everyone tells him that fact every day.

Keith makes his way on to the where the food is. He looks around and decides what’d he get from all the stuff that are on today’s menu. He waits with his tray on the line, chocolate milk, a croissant with butter, an apple and a pizza piece for Pidge since he knows she would’ve asked for one after he comes back. He doesn’t want to bother at this point so he buys it in advance. And if she’s not hungry Hunk or Matt usually take it. Maybe even Lance if he hadn’t had breakfast in the morning. There are just two more people in front of him when the song on the speakers ends and the intro of the familiar ‘_Say Say Say_’ by Paul McCartney and Michael Jackson begins. This song is so damn old, but he’s not surprised at all if this is probably Coran’s doing. Weekly, all of the teachers make a playlist with songs to sound in the school for the whole day. From all the art classes Keith knew Coran was a huge 80s fan. He often plays his favorite ones during class claiming that they’d calm them down. Keith always finds himself loving almost all of them.

_‘Say, say, say what you want_

_But don't play games with my affection_

_Take, take, take what you need_

_But don't leave me with no direction’_

He starts tapping his foot on the ground in sync with the beat, singing silently under his nose. The lyrics spills out of his mouth easily and confidently almost like Keith was the one who wrote it himself.

When the girl in front of him leaves and it’s Keith’s turn to pay, he leaves the tray so the Lunch Lady, Mary, can calculate the bill. They exchange greetings and the black haired pulls out the ten bucks he knew he kept in his front pocket when he left the house this morning. He puts the money on the counter and he grabs the tray with one hand until Mary gives him the exchange. He takes the coins and the five dollar bill with a thank you and tucks them, this time, in the back pocket of his jeans.

_“What can I do, girl, to get through to you?_

_Cause I love you, baby_

_Standing here, baptized in all my tears_

_Baby through the years, you know I'm crying_

_Oo oo oo oo oo”_

He turns around and heads towards his table, Romelle already there with the hood of her pink hoodie thrown over head, sunglasses on while scowling. She is murmuring something to Pidge, but Keith barely hears her over all the understandable chatter that’s happening around him. Keith finally makes it to his final destination with quick steps. He puts the yellow tray on the table and brings the pizza in front of Pidge. Her face perks up in happy surprise and she hugs his arm in gratefulness.

“Akira Kogane you’re an angel sent by the Gods above ugh,” Pidge waits no more and she grabs the piece and starts devouring it as if she hasn’t eaten in a week. It’s absolutely disgusting the way she eats it so quickly and unclean, but despite it Keith fondly ruffles her hair. And just when he’s about to sit down and enjoy his own food – he’s disturbed when a strong arm, skin tone just like his grabs his forearm and prevents him from doing it so. And before he turns around (because _oh we will_) he knows exactly who that is.

Maybe a door in the face wasn’t enough.

“Keith-“ James starts but Keith cuts him off from saying something other than his name.

“Listen, you dipshit, you either drop my hand in less than three seconds or you’ll leave this cafeteria with a broken nose.” He hisses, turns on his left and finally comes in face to face with his ex. He’s satisfied when he sees a huge red circle on his forehead that even his brown bang can’t even hide, but he doesn’t let it show.

Keith hasn’t glared like that in so long and it must still do the trick, since Griffin immediately frees his grip. The music is still going on, but it feels like everyone has stopped speaking. A quick scan behind James and around him proves that this is exactly what’s happening. _Stars_, this school is so peaceful that even when the smallest drama happens everyone all of a sudden is invested in the lives of said people who are caught up in the shit. And currently? Keith is the lead role. And he. Does. Not. Like. It.

James tries to step (_if it’s even possible_) closer to him and Keith firmly pushes him back to prevent him from doing it so. The push isn’t that strong, but strong enough to signalize that this means ‘_Back off_.’ Ryan Kinkade all of a sudden emerges and puts a big, muscled hand on his friend’s shoulder.

“James everyone is watching. You don’t wanna get in trouble right now, c’mon,” he tries to pull James away from Keith’s personal space, but the brunette doesn’t budge and in fact shrugs his hand away from his friend angrily.

Griffin’s eyes narrow. “I’ve been trying to speak with you for a whole week and you’re acting like some stubborn donkey!”

“What part of ‘_I want to break up_’ you didn’t fucking understand?!” Keith growls and despite that he doesn’t want to, he steps closer to his ex-boyfriend.

Anger licks his whole body and he clenches his hands. He and James were the same height so Keith could perfectly look him in the eyes and show his rage through his own glare intimidatingly. That familiar fire within him wakes and travels through every part of his body waiting to be released. All these eyes on him are making him nervous especially for a person like him who doesn’t like being in the spotlight. James was smart for choosing this place to throw his macho tantrum, knowing perfectly that Keith would be at disadvantage. But hell, if he is going to back down from this asshole.

“And what part of ‘_I want to talk with you_’ you didn’t fucking understand either?!”

“Did it go through you thick skull that I don’t want to talk with you?

James’s brown eyes give away his annoyance and Keith finds inside himself some sick satisfaction that he’s hurting him. He used to find his eyes pretty. They weren’t as breathtaking as Lance’s but they sure have their charm. Now all Keith wants to see is these eyes going away from his line of vision. He hears chairs scraping the floor and some students muttering, but the black haired doesn’t dare to move away from this position. He’s proving to everyone here that if you mess with him – you’re going to face the consequences. Keith is not backing down from this.

A small hand touches his back and he knows that Pidge is on his left without even looking. He hasn’t looked her in the face, but he knows she’s furious like him, if not even more. Pidge jokes and makes fun of you, but if someone else dares to do something to you she’s always the one who steps up immediately. She’s protective and calculating and maybe that’s why when they met they clicked faster than anyone they’ve both met before. They saw a lot of themselves in each other.

“Piss off, Griffin.” She sneers and Keith almost smiles in pride at how Kinkade behind James throws his hands in surrender. It’s hilarious how a person so small could make a guy like Ryan, whose muscles and height can rival Shiro’s, quiver in fear.

James’s eyes dart away from his and they settle on Pidge. A mocking grin appears on his face and Keith thinks ‘_oh no_’. He apparently failed to mention to him that Pidge is… well _Pidge_.

“And what are you going to do, huh? Break my kneecaps?” He rolls his eyes and a few students go ‘oooohh’ which Keith doesn’t get since what height has to do with it? And James acts as if breaking a kneecap wouldn’t hurt. What a fucking idiot, he’s almost ashamed that he dated him.

However, with a quick glance down on his left, Keith sees that Pidge stays unbothered, maybe even calm.

“That,” she shrugs and makes a long pause, “or…”

In a swift, practiced motion she pulls out her phone from her back pocket and unlocks it. She types some number, her thumb hovering over the green button for ‘call’. He furrows his eyebrows in confusion, not catching where Pidge is getting at, but a glance at James and his ashen, scared face tells him that this is something good.

“I can call your mommy,” Keith sucks in a breath and so does everyone else, “you know, _the Mayor_…”

_Shit,_ Keith almost forgot that James’s mother, Amelia Andrews, is the freaking Mayor of the city. Keith has seen her when he was coming over at their house. She is a bit stoic and intimidating, but from the talks he’s had with her she turned out to be actually a sweet and kind woman. He saw some of her in James, but Keith thinks he’s inherited most of the bad traits from his father who is some sort of high paid, famous lawyer.

“You know Griffin,” Pidge tilts her head on one side and for the first time Keith sees James speechless, “last week you followed Keith everywhere and didn’t leave him alone even when he told you ‘no’ and kept ignoring you. It’s Monday, the new week starts and it seems you’re still doing it.”

An evil smirk appears on her face and she wiggles her phone at him. Keith is so glad that he’s not James right now, holy shit.

“I think that this can count as harassment, don’t you think?”

“_You little-_“ He tries coming at her, but Keith is quick and pushes him away.

“You certainly don’t want harassment _and_ physical assault in your criminal record, don’t you think?” Her tone is sweet, teasing and in full contradiction with the one she used at first. “Especially when you’re the only one on your team who hasn’t been accepted into Altea, hm?”

At that almost the whole cafeteria ‘ooh’s’ at this and Keith finally allows his mouth to stretch in a grin. That’s a sore spot for every person who wants to get in that university, sorer for Griffin who is the only one left out in the whole basketball team. Keith remembers James mentioning that his grades in some important subjects lack high level and now he gets why he didn’t go to the previous acceptance exam. His ex simply knew that with grades like that he wouldn’t get accepted anyways. Pidge was right, like always, a criminal record wouldn’t do him good _at all_.

He watches James’s body shaking in rage, fists clenching and unclenching. He locks eyes with Keith one last time, huffs and turns around. He bumps his shoulder into Kinkade’s as he tries to make his way towards the exit, moving through all the students that gathered to watch the drama.

Keith shamelessly high fives Pidge.

Someone wolf whistles behind them and they both turn around to watch Romelle, Hunk and Matt clapping. Keith smiles, but when he looks at Lance who still has his hands crossed, eyebrows furrowed, his smile dies. When James first started bothering him the previous week he complained about it to Lance who proposed to report him to the principal. Of course Keith refused since the black haired didn’t think it would get _this_ bad. He assumed that Griffin would let it go soon, but obviously this wasn’t the case and Keith’s patience and tolerance were running out.

“And this ladies and gentlemen is Katie fucking Holt!” Romelle claps loudly once again.

Pidge bows in mockery. “Thank you, thank you… I want to thank my mom, my dad and my dog BaeBae because without him I wouldn’t be here.”

They all laugh (excluding Lance who was now toying with his phone) and Keith finally sits on his chair between Lance and Pidge. The blonde girl immediately starts interrogating Pidge along with Hunk who are curious about how Pidge knows the personal phone number of the mayor.

Meanwhile before Keith heads to eat his food (after he sanitizes his hands, because that speech Shiro always gives when he reminisces about a pandemic when he was ten still haunts Keith) he turns on his left and lands a cold palm on Lance’s warm skin.

“You okay?” Which okay, this is a bit of a stupid question, because Lance doesn’t look okay. However Keith knows that if Lance wants to, he’ll be honest with him about his feelings over this. Keith knows how angry he’d be if some ex of Lance treated him like James just did minutes ago.

Lance huffs and drops his phone on the table and leans back to stare at the ceiling. The device lights up and Keith shamelessly looks at and the sight of what’s on the screen makes his stomach churl unpleasantly.

**princess ** **✨**

Okay what time?

Keith wonders about what they’re talking about exactly.

_It’s probably a date_, he bitterly thinks.

Keith actually isn’t a jealous person, in fact he thinks he’s never felt this ugly emotion before with anyone besides Lance. With Rolo he felt more hurt than jealous since the guy he cheated on him with was beyond attractive and at that, Keith’s self-esteem dropped lower than the ground. With Matt he knew even back then that there was no chance to be in a relationship with him since he knew that Matt was as straight as a ruler. With James he wasn’t jealous since there was no one in James’s life that made him question his loyalty. Many people in the school only find him attractive but shy away from his personality. So in those two months of relationship that mostly consisted of sex and barely going on dates – Keith had absolutely nothing to be jealous of.

Lance though. Lance was a different story. Since the beginning of their friendship whenever the brunette had his attention romantically on someone new every week, Keith is sure his face turned green like in the animations. It was Plaxum in freshman, then Allura, then Nyma, then some hook ups with pretty girls who _weren’t him_ and now-… Now Keith knew he had a bit of a chance, but unfortunately he was once again against Allura. Who can even compare with _Allura_?! No one that’s who and certainly not _Keith_.

People were right, jealousy is an ugly thing.

When Lance doesn’t answer and Keith’s tummy growls in protest at not being fed, he gives Lance’s thigh a comforting pat and turns towards his croissant. Which is now a bit colder than he would like to. Great.

“Stupid Griffin,” he mumbles angrily and takes a bite.

It seems that he was heard since Pidge next to him hums in approval.

“Stupid indeed. I can’t believe that chicken shit keeps following you like some stray cat that you pet once. And the only difference is that the stray cats are adorable.”

Her nose wrinkles in disgust and Matt laughs in front of her.

Keith gulps his bite and wipes his mouth, “Listen I didn’t think that it’d get this bad. I’m honestly surprised Shiro doesn’t know.”

He rolls his eyes at the mention of his brother. Keith didn’t exactly tell him that his ex-boyfriend has been annoying him for the past days. First, because Shiro would flip his shit and be overdramatic about it, and second, it was because that this was his own personal problem. He wasn’t always going to get the support of his guardian and for the first ten years of his life when he’d been alone he managed to fight his battles just fine.

“Oh he will now,” Romelle chimes in, looking more alive, “I doubt people will stop talking about this soon.”

“Nooo,” Keith groans in annoyance and Pidge pets his head in sympathy. They both hate being in the center of attention and be talked about. It’s not that Keith or she were anti-social, but it was more that they liked their privacy much more and they preferred sharing it only with their closest people. Not with the whole fucking school.

He takes another sad bite and opens his chocolate milk so he can drink away the dryness.

“Ugh gross,” Hunk says and Keith lifts his head. Then he laughs when he sees at where he’s gazing, “Keith, buddy how can you eat those? They’re so dry and tasteless – a literal culinary disaster.” He shudders dramatically and Matt next to him snorts.

“Hunk dude, everything to you is a culinary disaster.”

“That’s not true,” Pidge adds, whilst there’s pizza in her mouth, “Hunk loves the raspberry cake Shay makes.”

Hunk nods enthusiastically, but before he can respond, Romelle laughs.

“Pretty sure Hunk loves everything that Shay does,” The blonde haired wiggles her eyebrows and the whole table erupts in laughter when Hunk starts stuttering.

Keith finishes his croissant and grabs the apple he also bought, but he only fiddles with it because he’s too lazy to get up and go and clean it. He throws another glance at Lance and he’s surprised to see the Cuban with closed eyes, probably in a light slumber. He feels himself smiling and he suppresses the urge to lean towards Lance and kiss his cheek. Or maybe run his fingers through that soft hair. Keith sighs quietly, dreamily and daydreams of times where he’d be able to do that. In another universe perhaps. Maybe he was unlucky in this one.

All of a sudden the bell rings and Keith giggles when Lance startles and sits up upright. It doesn’t go unnoticed since all of his friends start laughing. The brunette throws all of them a dirty look.

“Very funny.”

Hunk lets out even a louder, booming laugh and Lance looks at him in betrayal.

“_Et tu, Brute_?”

Keith laughs quietly at the dramatics and stands up to take his backpack. Hunk and he have English together so he patiently waits for his friend to gather his stuff that are cluttered on the table. Meanwhile Lance rises from his seat and grabs his phone from the table. He looks at the screen and Keith only assumes he read Allura’s response from earlier. He sighs heavily and his face has a grimace as if he ate something bitter and sour.

“Is everything okay?” Keith hears himself ask.

Lance glances away from his phone and looks at Keith. At first he doesn’t answer, just stares at him like he’s something important and doesn’t want to miss any expression. The black haired feels his cheeks reddening under Lance’s intense gaze and he wants to look away, but he wills himself to keep looking at Lance. At the end the Cuban only sighs again and nods in answer. Keith sees through the lie, but it seems Lance won’t tell him anything if he presses more. So he keeps his mouth shut and puts his hands in his red hoodie.

He glances up and sees that just on time Hunk grabs his backpack, catches Keith’s eyes and nods at the doors with a smile. He heads towards the exit, expecting Keith to follow. However, before Keith does he puts a hand on Lance’s shoulder, because he can’t help himself. Keith gives him a private, sincere smile just for him. A smile that he hopes means ‘_I’m here for you if you want to talk_’ for Lance to understand. Without missing a second, Lance returns the smile.

Keith’s heart bursts itself and that breaks the illusion of when Keith thought this morning he’s finally getting over Lance Ramirez.

_No_, he thinks, _I’m never getting over that boy_.

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ .:*・°☆.。.:*

“Okay team, so all we gotta do for the game after two weeks is keep up the good shape and we may be on the finals in May!” Shiro announces with a big smile on his face as he waves the tablet that has the court on its display.

Lance, next to him nods in understanding at whatever his coach says and scans all of his teammates and the players-to-be. There’s his team – Lotor, Ryan, Matt and of course James Griffin whose face looks even more bitter than usual. Lance doubts Shiro doesn’t already know about what happened on lunch and he marvels at how patient and professional Shiro is. The Cuban is barely holding himself back to not punch that bastard in the face. Images of hours ago appear in his mind and he brings his hands behind his back.

There are the rest of the players who are either reserves or boys and girls whom Shiro and Mrs. Luxia still think need a lot of work to be ready to play in a real basketball team. The official girls team consists of Nadia Rizavi, Zethrid Bryant, Ina Leifsdottir, Luca Moore _(Lance only remembers her surname since she and Romelle dated)_ and Merla Diaz. From all of them, Lance is only familiar with Nadia. They’ve been buddies since freshman when they both came earlier for the first basketball practice. They have a similar sense of humor and they’re both captains so his conversations with her always are relatable and full of memes.

He knows Zethird and her girlfriend Ezor too, but he’s never talked with them much. He’s hung out with them once or twice when he dated Nyma since Ezor is from the volleyball team. They’re cool and funny, but Lance thinks he and they aren’t meant to be the greatest friends.

About Ina, Luca and Merla he barely knows shit. Ina is emotionless half of the time which is a bit scary for him – a person who feels like he’s on coffee or energy drinks most of the time. Luca he’s met, but he prefers not to talk with since she broke Romelle’s heart. It’s cool though since it’s clear she doesn’t want to talk with him either. Merla, he only assumes, is an amusing girl. She’s a sophomore, but from all he’s heard when they have mixed practices is that she curses like a sailor. It’s especially funnier when all of her swears and rants are in Spanish and he manages to understand everything perfectly. Lance doesn’t know how many times he has laughed as he is about to make a shot or pass when he hears Merla yelling ‘PUTA MADRE’ and fails. She has laughed at his curses too and they always nod at each other in recognition. He’s seen the pin with the colors of the Mexican flag on her backpack so he’s always thought she’s from there without ever talking to her.

“Psst,” Nadia next to him punches him on the bicep and he flinches.

“What?” He turns to look her in the face and he finds her grinning. She looks so weird (not in a bad way of course) without the oval glasses that are smaller, but a bit samiliar with Pidge’s ones which always catches him off guard.

“Oh you know what Loverboy,” she purrs at him and brings her clasped hands under her chin, mocking the nickname he chose for himself years ago. He rolls his eyes with a huff and tugs the straight lock of hair she always lets out of her headband. She spends too much time with Veronica honestly.

She doesn’t react to the tugging, but puffs in annoyance at his antics.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Oh you know exactly what I’m talking ‘bout…” She whispers at him, putting a hand-barrier so she can whisper discreetly when Shiro throws her a stink eye for talking too loud.

When Lance only responds with a raised eyebrow, the excited spark in her eyes is replaced with irritation and a really quiet groan. Lance really has no idea what’s going on. He gets even more confused, when Nadia puts her forearm on his shoulder, leans on him and drags a left hand over her face as if Lance killed her will to live with one sentence.

“You know, I was with Allura when she received that text hours ago,” she wiggles her eyebrows suggestively, “what does ‘_meet me after practice, it’s important_’ mean, huh? Are you planning a date or something mm?”

At first Lance is still a bit confused, but when he gets what is Rizavi implying he wishes he didn’t text Allura. What Nadia thinks, is that Lance has planned something romantic and mind-blowing.

Nadia is wrong, because Lance actually plans to break up with his girlfriend today.

He’s thought about it for days, weeks even if he’s honest. How he was going to do it, where, what is he going to say and his reasons for it. Because it hurts to know that in his girlfriend’s eyes he’s extremely happy with her. Allura probably thinks that them together is a dream come true. And honestly the Lance from years ago would be on the top of the world, planning dates, singing seranades, maybe even deciding what the theme colors for their wedding are going to be.

He now cringes at the thought of it. Not because of how romantic and cheesy it sounds – but more at how Allura is nowhere in his brain when he thinks about those stuff. Only one person exist in these plans and that’s the beautiful boy with the mullet.

His heart squeezes itself, because Allura is probably excited for whatever she thinks Lance is going to do, when in reality he’ll break her heart. He has the sudden urge to curl himself in a ball on the floor and cry his heart out. God, why was he so horrible? Why he couldn’t be happy with Allura? He’s wanted her for so long and now when he finally has her next to him – his heart makes a full 180 and decides it wants someone else?

(_But deep down Lance knows his heart has always desired for the boy with a scowl on his face, beautiful eyes and a difficult personality._)

Nadia must sense something is wrong since her bold stance softens and she taps her fingers on her shoulder.

“Hey, are you okay?”

He hears the concern in his voice, but he doesn’t get to reply, because Shiro clasps his hands together and yells, “Okay that’s it now let’s get to work!”

Lance is incredibly thankful for the save, but he throws an apologetic look to Nadia who only sighs and pats his shoulder and jogs over to the girls. The touch reminds him of when earlier Keith did the same and Lance got too enchanted with the sight of him, smiling soft, his eyes sparkling with something he can’t name.

“Lance?”

The Cuban looks over and sees Shiro, a tiny understanding smile on his lips who nods over. Lance follows and sees the boys giving him ‘are you coming or not’ faces. The brunette shakes his head and makes his way to his team. He’s been distracted all day and he’s distracted now on basketball practice which is unacceptable. How is he supposed to be a professional player if he lets his mind wander too much?

They start with a proper warming up, Shiro blasting his favorite songs from his tablet. Some he knows, some he doesn’t. Thankfully he doesn’t play ballads as he first used to do (which was a nightmare since how is Lance supposed to do his rhythmic jumps to My Heart Will Go On?!). James and this one boy are lacking off at some exercises, but Lance keeps his tongue behind his teeth since he doesn’t want a fight. Especially when he promised himself that there’d be no distractions. No matter how strongly Lance dislikes that asshole right now, he’s not going to let the pettiness win over. As long as they’re both on the court they’re a team and he’s the captain. What if in the future he gets placed in a team and he doesn’t like one of his teammates? Of course his life would be more enjoyable and easier if this doesn’t happen, but life is life and nothing would be handed over to him on a plate – especially after high school. He has to learn how to suck it up so it can be useful in the future.

The music stops and he hears some girls and boys whining over the song not being finished.

“Uhh girls it appears Coach Luxia has an emergency problem so it’s going to be me against all of you I guess,” he looks up from his device and frowns apologetically at the girls, “I’m sorry.”

With no surprise to Lance, none of the girls look even slightly disappointed or bothered. And no, it’s not only because Shiro looks like the Adonis himself. A lot of new students who come are still amazed at the fact that _the_ Takashi Shirogane is a teacher in this school, just like fourteen year old Lance was awestruck of such a basketball legend being his freaking neighbor. Who wouldn’t want advices and tips from such a living legend?

Another glorious and famous player like Kolivan Galra is a coach too, but in the professional league. Keith had told him that he with Shiro and Adam had visited the man so many times that he considers him an uncle at that point. Lance is still jealous over that. Keith once proposed to introduce them, but Lance refused, wanting their first meeting to go with Lance already a pro, playing for preferably the White Lions, complimenting his skills. Or criticize them. Lance doesn’t care, if he’s being honest – he’d let that man to even step on him.

“Do you all want to play together or separately? The court is big enough for both options so whatever y’all want.” He shrugs.

_Y’all_. Lance snorts. Why is it so funny to him when Keith or Shiro flip these Texan slangs? Not that only Texas uses ‘yall’ but it’s the state where most of them say it anyways.

“I honestly don’t care – I’m down with both, although I think it’ll be more beneficial if we play together. Both teams can learn something new from each other since we almost always play separately anyways.” Lance says as a captain and looks at the boys who all nod in agreement.

Shiro bobs his head and oblivious Lance doesn’t see the pride in his dark gray eyes. He then looks at Rizavi for her opinion. She only turns around and all of the girls mutter ‘Sure’, ‘Whatever’ or ‘No problem’.

They start with basic passing and dribbles. Some offense-defense exercises and shooting. They mix their teams and make new ones. The first mini game is Lance’s team that contains Zethrid, Kinkade, Florona and Elijah who are both sophomores. They’re against Rizavi’s team which is made up of Lotor, Matt, Alina (the reserve for the girl’s team) and Maria (a freshman girl) who is so short, small, but fit in the arms and the legs. And if there’s anything Lance has learned from his friendship with Pidge – is to never, ever underestimate small people. Judging by the way Matt high fives her – he knows better too.

They start the game and if Lance is being deadly serious – he hasn’t had so much fun during a basketball practice in so long that he often forgets that this is supposed to be serious. Not to say he doesn’t love basketball anymore, but from all the seriousness and the pressure, you can kind of forget why you started loving it in the first place.

He and Rizavi fist bump in the beginning, but that’s the only act of friendship. The rest of the game is war. They’re doing dirty tricks to each other, flip each other off, curse and punch playfully. Even Lotor, ever the serious, is visibly having fun and that is saying a lot. Shiro yells ‘_Language!_’ a bit too much in Lance’s opinion since he has heard the way he swears at the TV when the Lions have a game.

Like in the official school team, Lance once again plays as a shooting guard. Kinkade also has not changed his position which is a center. Lance placed Zethrid as a power forward, Florona is point guard since she’s the shortest of them all and finally Elijah who’s playing as a small forward. Lance has seen the way that boy plays and he for sure has talent. All in all Lance is super satisfied with the positions and is sure they’ll win.

Matt rivals him in the shooting guard position, but they both know Lance is a better shooter than him. And the older Holt is the point guard in their team so this is a bit of a disadvantage for him. Lotor and Ryan as centers in their teams laugh a lot. And if Lance is honest it’s really strange to see the most serious players in his team giggle like hyenas at everything.

At the end Lance’s team is the one that wins, but they almost lost due to too much fooling around. Not that Lance minds – his mood has uplifted so much and all thoughts about Keith, Allura and his bisexuality are out of the window. It’s just him and basketball and he can’t say he’s not happy about it. They high five and congratulate each other. Shiro praises them and the rest who haven’t played are already making new two teams.

“That was simply an incredible game,” Lotor takes a bottle of water, sits on the bench as he dries his face with his black towel, “we should play together more often.”

“Yeah,” Zethrid agrees with a huge grin, “can’t say I minded playing with you boys too.”

“I wonder how they’re going to rearrange the new teams,” Matt says from the ground, limbs sprawled around looking like a sea star. Rizavi, Elijah and Alina next to him, all sitting with crossed legs, nod. Maria and Florona are on the bench, leaning on each other and are still panting – too tired to even say something. Lance chuckles at the sight since he is reminded of himself. He used to be way worse, not used to the intense way Shiro made them practice. The Cuban crosses his arms and cracks his neck left and right. Ryan emerges next to him and silently hands him Lance’s water bottle. He’s such a sweet guy, always helping his teammates, kind and supportive. Sometimes when Lance starts doubting his captain position he wonders why Shiro didn’t make Kinkade the leader. This guy is literally a quieter Hunk and an outstanding player. He really hopes they’re teammates again in Altea. After Matt, he gets along the most with Ryan, but that’s a bit far stretched since everyone likes him and is really hard not to anyways.

“Thanks man,” Lance says and takes his blue bottle, that’s filled with cold water. He takes a sip and moans in pleasure. That’s what heaven feels like, Lance just knows it. He fills his hand with some and wets his face and hair.

Ryan sighs, but it doesn’t sound like a normal sigh. It was more of a sigh you slip out when something is bothering you, don’t ask - Lance is an expert on sighs. Nevertheless, there’s no need for Lance to ask what’s wrong since the guy himself speaks.

“I’m worried about James.”

‘_Too bad ‘cause I’m not_’ Lance almost says, but holds himself on time. He doesn’t say it more out of respect for Ryan than anything. After all, he’s friends with the guy and even tried to reason with him earlier when he almost jumped on Keith. They’ve been buddies for as long as Lance remembers his time in this school.

When Lance doesn’t anything, he continues with a firm voice, but with concern evident on his handsome face.

“He’s not himself lately. Angrier. He snaps at me, Nadia and Ina and we’re all afraid he’s going to do something stupid. I think he’s just heartbroken over Kogane which is understandable, but his coping mechanisms are just terrible – he even started smoking again, not to mention his mother hates it…” He starts rubbing his temple as if he had this conversation millions of times.

“I don’t understand,” Lance answers hesitantly, “what do I have to do with this exactly?”

“I don’t know. Honestly I thought that as Keith’s friend you might knock some sense into him.”

His olive green eyes are pleading him to take a consideration and Lance’s shoulder drop off some tension. He doesn’t understand why James would listen to him of all people, but if Kinkade thinks that he might – then perhaps it’s worth a try? And it’s a bit far stretched to say he hates Griffin. Yes, he tolerated him for the sake of his place on the team, and he learned to accept him the way he was for Keith and his happiness. He started disliking him again when he continued ignoring Keith’s requests to leave him alone. Couldn’t that guy take a hint?!

And of course, just when he is about to agree with talking with James, yelling is heard from the distance. All of them snap their heads from where the source is and Lance is surprised to Julien O’Connor _(the junior who flirted with Keith months ago)_ with crossed arms frowning at James whose bicep is being held back by Ina that has a slight scowl on her freckled, usually emotionless face. Lance doesn’t have time to dwell on this before he and Ryan run over to see what’s happening. From the corner of his eye he sees Shiro quickly approaching and unconsciously calms down. If Shiro is here then everything will be okay.

They arrive just when Julien yells, “-huh? Are you going to punch me? Bet you want to since your hands are obviously itching to do it? Were you going to punch Keith too? Dick.” He snarls.

Lance agrees with everything the younger boy said, but watching James crumble a bit under the heaviness of Julien’s words, even _he_ feels a little bad for him. But he quickly recovers and hisses at the blonde haired.

“Mind your business O’Connor, unless you want me to wipe the ground with your face-“ Ina struggles to hold him, but before Griffin breaks from her grip Kinkade grabs his other hand. At the same time Lance positions himself in front of Julien and puts a hand on his chest in case he tries something stupid. Thankfully Shiro joins.

“What is going on in here? Julien? James? What’s the meaning of this?” He looks between them, worry but there is a slight anger visible on his face. Whether at the fact that they were making a scene in the middle of a practice or because he knew James bothered Keith, Lance isn’t really sure.

“Ask that abusive piece of sh-“

“_Julien_.” Lance warns and is surprised to see the junior’s eyes widening. He quickly shuts up. While it’s true that Lance is the captain of his team he never thought that his teammates respected him enough to obey him. They listen to him, but Julien looks almost ashamed that Lance had to intervene. It leaves him giddy to know that the boys are respectful and actually like him. The thing that made him stop Julien was honestly the fact he called James ‘abusive’. James might be a piece of shit and a lot of things, but he was _not_ abusive. Lance wasn’t going to stand speechless when the younger boy throws such heavy words as if they have no weight. 

“What is going on here? I’m not going to ask again.” Shiro warns and Lance feels shiver running down his spine. Shiro is so scary when he’s mad and the Cuban is glad that he is not included in that petty argument Griffin and O’Connor are having.

The following silence could’ve been funny if it wasn’t for Shiro’s burning glare. It feels as if whoever speaks will be made of a pancake on the floor no matter that everyone knows how much of a good person Shiro is. Lance is determined to speak up, but James beats him to it.

“Apologies, coach. It seems like O’Connor has some problem with me.” He says gravely and Shiro follows at where he’s glaring. He raises a simple eyebrow at said boy in question. He then sends Lance a quick quizzical glance, but the blue eyed simply looks away.

“Yes I have.” The boy is quick to answer. “I don’t want to play with assholes who harass other people. Is that so bad?” Julien’s tone is bitter. He speaks as if he knows the whole situation and plays it as a judge. And in people’s eyes he might look honorable, but Lance knows it’s just a bunch of bullshit. He knows that the junior only says it not because of the reasons he stated, but more because he thinks he can act as some knight defending Keith’s honor.

“Harass??” Shiro’s puzzled at the accusation. And at this moment Lance gets it – Shiro simply doesn’t have a clue about what happened on lunch. He doesn’t know if this is worse or better, but looking at James’s shocked and angry face he assumes Griffin is _not_ happy with where things are going.

He can basically see the gears in Shiro’s head turning. His face escalates from confusion to realization in just matter of seconds.

Lance thinks that Shiro is going to flip, yell, kick James out or be sent to the principal. Maybe even worse – be suspended. He can’t even imagine to be suspended at this time of the year, especially with the way James still has trouble with getting accepted into Altea.

Lance is wrong.

Shiro only closes his eyes, inhales and exhales. He scratches the scar on his nose and Lance has noticed he does this when he’s under stress, kind of like a nervous tick. Equals with Keith’s fiddling hands and Lance’s rambling. Everyone has them. At the end he opens his eyes and points with the fingers of the prosthetic arm towards them both.

“I don’t want any fights in here or anywhere. You are _not_ in middle school anymore. _Control_. _Your_. _Anger_.” He pit points at each word with a stern voice and Lance feels how Julien relaxes under his hand. He lets go of him, turns back and offers him a little supportive smile. The junior answers with a grin that looks more like a grimace and Lance almost winces in sympathy. Maybe he judged the boy pretty quickly? He notes to himself to talk with him after this practice.

Lance hears Shiro walking away and to this day Lance will wonder what would’ve Shiro done if he heard what James Griffin said afterwards.

“Maybe if he controlled his little cousin with anger issues this wouldn’t have happened.”

Lance freezes. He sees all of the boys and girls leaving. Ina and Ryan let go of James and pat him comfortingly. When Ryan sees that Lance is still not going away – he must assume that Lance will talk with his pathetic excuse of a friend. He nods at Lance with a grateful smile and turns around Ina so they can leave them in piece.

Lance for a moment feels bad, because what’s going to happen next… Ryan wasn’t going to fancy it.

“Are you here to give me a pep talk, oh great captain?” James even has the nerve to ask with that asshol-ish tone of his. The bossy one like Lance is some annoying gum stuck on his foot.

_There is Mommy’s rich boy._

“I see how it is,” Lance exclaims through gritted teeth, “the coach leaves and you think you can shit talk about Keith behind his back.” He comes closer to Griffin and is glad that he’s taller than him. His height isn’t usually something he brags about, but if a clown like James gets intimidated by it – he’s going to use it. “You’ve always been all talk, Griffin. Act like you’re tough shit and then shrink behind Kinkade when it gets heated.”

“Says _you_. The guy who Shiro pitied after seeing your puppy eyes for a whole season and made you a captain.” James sneers. “We both know your leadership is non-existent. You think you’ve improved, but you’re still the same idiot who thinks he can play from years ago.”

Griffin is the one who steps closer this time and grins. “We all know if it wasn’t for Daddy dying you’d never come here, isn’t that right?”

Lance’s nostrils flare and he almost raises to the bait. He’s not sure from where he even knows about his father, but he’s not a dumbass. James is trying to get him to hurt him, so Lance can be the one throwing punches – because then James would be the victim. As ridiculous as it sounds.

“You know bat shit about me or my family.”

James shrugs. That smirk doesn’t fall from his face. “You wanna know what I know though?”

Lance’s breaths are coming out short. James leans in and his smile is wicked.

“I’ve noticed how you look at Keith.” He leans back. “And at first I thought to myself ‘_Maybe I’m just imagining it_’, but despite what you think I’m not actually that stupid-”

“Could’ve fooled me.”

“-I know you like him.” James interrupts him. “It’s so obvious and it makes me _sick_ that you’re dating Allura at the same time. You like best of both worlds, huh Ramirez? Who would’ve thought?”

Lance’s vision fills with red.

This lunch he felt that icy anger. The colder one, the one that almost looks as if he’s calm, but it feels like he’ll freeze someone to death if he touches. The cold shoulder. The anger that slowly and slowly creeps through your whole body until you’re left with an icy heart and icy fingers.

What Lance feels now is the complete opposite. It feels like a volcano erupts in his whole self. His mouth is dry and he feels he’ll start shaking any moment. Unlike the ice, the fire is quick and it leaves no questions for the aggression that comes with it. _He itches. He itches_, his fist keeps clenching and unclenching. It feels as if he doesn’t smash Griffin’s face soon the scratch won’t go away. He doesn’t get it. What James said wasn’t even the worst thing somebody has thrown at him. Yet he can’t help, but want to grab that bang and throw that asshole away and never see him again on the face of Earth.

His heart starts pumping faster and faster. Lance feels like he’ll suffocate. The huge court all of a sudden feels too small for his body. He keeps itching and he wills himself to break away from looking at James’s face. Instead he glares at the bench and catches Lotor still speaking with Zethrid.

Lance doesn’t know how, but Griffin is now awfully close to his ear. Lance’s nails dig into his skin and it hurts, but the pain grounds him even if it’s not much. Keeps his head clearer.

“Bet you want to moan Keith’s name while you’re fucking Altea.”

At this point the rest of what happened wasn’t even Lance anymore. He wasn’t on himself when he finally swung and his fist collides with James’s smirking face. He doesn’t hear a crack and he hopes he didn’t break that motherfucker’s nose. In the midst of all the chaos and rage, even Lance knows how bad would that be for him. James falls on the floor with a grunt and Lance is sickly satisfied with the blood that comes with it. He goes in again and straddles his stomach, but when he tries to land the next punch James surprisingly catches his hand and gives a punch of his own on his left. Lance’s entire side throbs and inertia makes him fall on the right, on his back. Where he hits his head on the floor hard. Very hard. Griffin is fast, Lance will give him that, since he is the one who tries to straddle him now. Lance is quick to kick him in the thigh and the other topples next to him.

However, before Lance can continue a big brown hand enters his vision and pushes Lance away before he can hop on beating James’s ass. He growls in annoyance, but metal is the one thing that stops him now. Shiro pushes him on his back.

“Lance, stop it. C’mon deep breaths, calm down…”

Lance tries to, but his heart is still beating too fast and adrenaline is still making him jumpy and a bit scared.

“C’mon Lance in for four seconds, hold for seven and then exhale for eight. I know you can do it…” Shiro’s voice is comforting and it helps him. He tries to do what Shiro told him to do and at first it’s sloppy and definitely not in the time Shiro said to do it, but he manages to finally drop the tension and plop on the ground. “Just like that,” he encourages.

Eventually everything catches onto him.

First he hears the voices. Everyone is talking over each other and it makes his head spin. He lets out pained whine and tries to press his hand over his throbbing head. The pain on his left side is a bit unbearable at the moment, but he knows that it’s probably not that bad. He’s one hundred percent sure he caused James more damage. He shakily puts his fingers under his nostrils and exhales in relief when he doesn’t feel blood. He’s definitely going to sport a black eye for the next week or two.

He decides to open his eyes. Which is a mistake, since the light from the sun causes his head to spin even more. His vision in the left eye is blurred which causes a mid-panic washing over him.

“No close your eyes, you probably have a mild concussion,” Shiro forces his eyes to close with the prosthetic arm which is heavenly cold against the heat on his face.

The rest is a blur. He hears someone saying ‘nurse’ and ‘principal’, but Lance can’t grab onto anything else. It’s hard since there are now more voices than Shiro’s and they’re all so fast that he can’t catch up even if he tries.

But at the end he just lets the soothing blackness take him in its embrace.

{ * }

Surprisingly – the quietness is what wakes Lance up.

By now he is used to be awoken to to different sounds. Arguing, the little childish screams, his mom’s yelling or the TV being too loud are always the sounds that greet him in the morning or when he takes a nap. For once to wake up to a peaceful environment is weird, but Lance can’t decide if it’s a good or bad weird.

He opens his eyes, fluttering his lashes, and a pastel yellow roof greets him. He slowly turns his head to take in his surroundings. Lance sees a white closet, with a small screen and electronic buttons next to it. Password for whatever it’s inside. He sees the small sink next to it and it’s not until he smells the alcohol he realizes that this is the nurse’s office. The window is open and fresh air fills in, blowing the curtain into the room. He hears the birds chirping outside and the afternoon sun causes a beautiful glow inside the room. He lets himself rest a little bit more, mentally preparing himself for when the nurse or someone else comes in.

With everything catching onto him he wishes he didn’t wake up for another ten years. Memories flash in front of his eyes and he can’t believe he let the anger take the best of him like that. Lance has never ever in his life punched someone. He’s gotten into fights with his siblings that sometimes got too far, but this is just unacceptable. He hit a teammate in the face to the point where he started _bleeding_! What would his mother think? Lance is never like this. He is never this belligerent against anyone. He dislikes some people and he certainly never thought about beating them up or something of the sort. Would his friends be disappointed in him? Would they demand know what James said to get him this aggressive? What if he already said to someone? Might as well buy a ticket to some country at the end of the world and live there, because the shame, guilt and embarrassment would crush him.

With a careful motion he sits up, hand immediately reaching to the side of his head that is painfully throbbing. He looks around the room again. There’s the desk and all the medical posters with the human’s anatomy on them. Posters with how to properly wash your hands, how to treat a broken limb and how to perform CPR. Next to the door there is a bowl full of condoms and next to it – various pads packages in all colors. Everything about this room is familiar to him, he’s an athlete after all. Of course, his injuries are never this extreme. A sprained ankle, wrist or a stomachache is nothing compared to the pain of after being punched.

His inner monologue is interrupted when the door is softly being opened.

The nurse – Selena Grace enters and Lance is infinitely relieved that she’s alone. Lance knows that he’d have to face Shiro and the principal – Mrs. Ryner after this, because there’s _no_ way he’s getting out of this situation without any consequences. However, with this headache of his, and not to mention that the corner of his left eye is still blurry, he doesn’t exactly desire to have a conversation with these people right now. Or people in general except for nurse Grace. She is fairly young, perhaps thirty or so and the youth is still visible in the way she smiles and talks. She is always so calm, accepting and like her surname – graceful. Once when Lance asked how is she able to walk so upright, steps light and feathery, she had told him she used to do ballet for many years – before she quit since she wanted to study medicine more. She has this huge curly, blonde hair with the front strands always pinned on the back with a sparkling hairpin.

Her green eyes immediately notice him and she smiles, eyes crinkling at the corners. Goddamn, it’s admirable how this woman is so happy all the time.

“Lance, I see you’re awake!” She closes the door behind her and puts the papers she’s holding on her desk. “How are you feeling?”

She immediately heads to the white closet and types the code so quick, Lance isn’t even able to remember the first number even if he wanted to. She picks two bottles of something, a plastic cup and bandages.

“I’ve been better.” He sighs.

Her response is only a quiet hum as she closes the closet and puts all of the items on the cupboard next to him. She only takes the cup to fill it with water from the sink. She silently hands it to him. He takes it and drinks. That cold water really does wonders and he chugs in matter of seconds. After he empties it, Lance sets it on the cupboard.

“Turn around so I can treat that hand of yours,” she mutters and a quick glance at his hand leaves him surprised at his knuckles which are bloodied. It doesn’t hurt much, but when he puts pressure on it to turn his lower half on the left, Lance immediately hisses in pain. He goes in to touch it when nurse Grace stops him.

“Upupup don’t you dare touch that with a dirty hand,” she starts cleaning her hands with soap and throws him a warning look, “just give me a second.”

Feet now dangling he watches how after she’s finished drying her hands, she gets a new pair of rubber gloves and puts them on.

“C’mon,” she urges him to give his right hand and he complies.

Her touch is incredibly light and Lance is grateful for it, because damn if it doesn’t hurt with addition of the headache that still reminds him of the pain he is now.

The woman inspects his knuckles and tsks disapprovingly under her nose. “My, my you really did some damage on that boy and on yourself too.”

He grimaces. She reaches for the cupboard and opens the first drawer. Pulls out a package of cotton, takes a big hunk of it and then puts it back on its place.

Just when she opens the bottle with peroxide (now that Lance is able to read what’s written) and irrigates the small chug she took from the cotton, Lance dares to ask her the question.

“Is…” he gasps quietly because of the sting, but quickly gathers himself, “Is he okay?”

She falters for just a split second, which would be unnoticeable for some people, but these things never run past Lance. He’s an observer and loves inspecting the people around him which usually helps him a lot. Because of these little signs people give away when they act or talk he’s able to read the person in front of him easily and decide what to do in a certain situation. Keith has told him that this is one of his best qualities, but Lance doesn’t think it’s much of a skill. Not to mention that anyone with social skills more than his will be impressive to the black haired boy.

She spreads the peroxide widely, determination to do her job perfectly.

“He had a bloody nose when I visited him, a mild concussion,” she lifts the ball of cotton away from the injury, “he sprained his wrist a little and he’ll be blue for a week,” satisfied with the result, she throws the dirty cotton in the trash.

“But he’ll live.” She sighs with a smile and he returns it with a nod.

She puts her hands on her hips and raises an eyebrow in question, “Can you get up and wash your hands?”

“_Pssh_ Nurse Grace, do you remember that you’re talking to-“ Cockiness is familiar on his tongue, but his body seems to betray him since the moment he stands up too fast the whole room spins. And if it’s not for nurse Grace grabbing him he definitely would’ve fell on the ground like a sack of potatoes, embarrassing himself.

“_Woaaah_ okay I think you might have to help me.”

“I figured.” She laughs quietly and pats his chest.

She leads him towards the sink and sets the water to be cold. The nurse gently grabs both of his hands and lets the water wash them. It doesn’t sting as much as when she put peroxide on them, but it was more than bearable now. He waits for her to decide when to stop the water and the longer he waits – the throbbing in his hand, as if magically, washes away. And _just_ when he gets comfortable, nurse Grace stops the flooding.

She helps him sit on the bed again, but this time she takes a towel from the second drawer so she can dry his hands.

“I’m going to put some antiseptic cream on them so they don’t get infected and then bandage your hand. On the morning tell your mother to change it again,” she grabs the said item from the cupboard and opens it so she can squirt some on her hand. She starts spreading it profusely over his knuckles and the cold soothing feeling makes him sigh happily and he tips his head back in pleasure. Not to mention that the massage she gives is so nice and Lance quickly relaxes under her rhythmic movements.

Sadly it doesn’t last for long and for a negative time his hand is already wrapped safely and nicely, years of bandaging people visible in her work.

“Now,” she says and throws her gloves in the trash, “let’s look at that head of yours.”

She takes a hold of his chin and inspects, a grim look on her face.

“You have a bruise at the corner of your left eye that will be there for a week, two at most but I doubt it’ll stay for long. He didn’t hit you as hard as you did.” She reaches a hand into the pocket of her apron and pulls out a penlight. She lights it up right at his left eye and he feels his head starting to hurt even more. He immediately closes his eyes on reflex to stop the pain that the brightness caused him.

“Hmm just as I suspected,” she muses, “you might have a mild concussion too. Do you have any complaints?”

“Yeah, my head hurts a lot,” she nods, “and my vision is a bit blurred in the left eye.”

She hums and turns his head from left to right up and down, probably checking for more damage, but at the end she only pulls away with a satisfied sigh.

“If those are your only complaints – then it’s nothing that can’t be fixed. Just apply some cream on that eye of yours, take some painkillers when you get a headache,” she pats his cheek fondly and walks towards her desk, “and you’ll be good as new.”

She sits on the chair and with a handprint she opens the hologram screen. He can’t see what she’s doing, only sees the blue back of the hologram and the way her fingers slide, tap and then write down on the keyboard.

“Mr, Shirogane has contacted your mother so lay down and rest until she arrives.”

He nods and does what he’s said. He places his right forearm over his closed eyes and breathes. Gods above, his mother would be either super pissed or super worried. Or both. Horrific outcomes for his well-being, but Lance couldn’t say he’d blame her. He wonders if James’s mother is also being called here. She’s the mayor so she must have to sacrifice some important business to visit her son at school who got into a fight.

A fight _he_ started. Lance Ramirez. He suppresses a wince. The thought of him being suspended scares the absolute shit out of him. If Mrs. Ryner suspends him he might lose his scholarship in Altea, maybe even worse, they could kick him out without Lance not even starting his freshman year there. Frustration at himself started building up inside of him. _Goddamit_ why did he act so impulsively and punched that stuck up douchebag in the face?! That’s exactly what he wanted and Lance basically handed his future on a silver plate. He was stupid for letting James get under his skin like that.

_“Bet you want to moan Keith’s name while you’re fucking Altea.”_

His brain provided him with the memory of James saying this and Lance tried not to grit his teeth since he knew it’d hurt like a bitch. He and Allura haven’t even had sex – _and even if they did_ – it was none of his business. His heart started trashing around when he reminisced that James also knew about him being in love with Keith. Or at least his crush on him.

What if James sang all this on Keith? On _Allura_? This is not the way Lance wanted Keith to figure out he is in love with him. And this is definitely _not_ the way his girlfriend would want to get the news of him not actually liking her more than platonically this whole time. They both deserved a real, actual explanation of his feelings, not some idiot who deserved his punch in the face, hurting them on purpose just so he can get it back at Lance.

But what if James didn’t say anything and Lance had to explain everything to whoever asked? And he knows he eventually has to if he wants to keep his place on Altea and the trust his friends have in him. But what’d he tell them? For starters, it was incredibly offensive to Allura and Keith and the Cuban boy wasn’t sure if they’d feel better if he told them the actual reason he tried to beat up Griffin. Not to mention that he has to face Shiro and his dad-like disappointment which was utterly a horrible experience he’d never wish even on his worst nemesis.

What would even Lance say? What would be his defense against James’s possible insults and demands for justice?

_‘Yeah well I uh got pissed because this chicken shit here disrespected both, my best friend and girlfriend. Oh yeah also I’m actually in love with said best friend rather than the actual girlfriend. Please don’t suspend me or make Altea cancel my scholarship I’m good I promise!!!”_

Yes, because that would totally work.

Somehow with all these thoughts running through his head, it’s not shocking that Lance can’t catch up to them anymore and slowly drifts away. He’s not actually sleeping and Lance finds himself in that phase when you can still hear everything and be aware of what’s happening around you, but it still feels as if he turned the volume down by a lot. Gravity pulls him down and his limbs fully relax. Is it thanks to the soft music that nurse Grace is playing and is humming to, or the fact that he’s too tired, that soothes him more Lance doesn’t know. Nor he cares since that headache feels lighter than before and he is taking advantage of that to nap until his mom comes.

He doesn’t wait for long, since there’s a soft knock to the door.

“It’s open,” nurse Grace calls out and he hears the quiet wooshing noise of the door being opened and someone entering.

“Good afternoon ma’am,” the nurse greets and Lance finally takes his hand away so he can properly open his eyes, “I assume you’re Lance’s mother? Jesus, why did I even ask? You look so much alike it’s unreal!”

He hears the awe in the nurse’s voice and grins a little. He opens his eyes (which takes him painfully too much will) and looks at his mother. She’s wearing her peach pink coat, her hair in a curly ponytail that falls gracefully on her back with a few strands that have escaped are framing her face. (That are, Lance is certain, not on purpose since his mother despises when her hair gets messy.)

“I’ve heard that before,” his mother smiles charmingly and makes a few tiny steps forward so she can exchange hands with the nurse, “I’m Luna Carillo.”

“Selena Grace. A pleasure to meet you ma’am.”

They handshake and Lance calls out from his bed. “Miss Grace they once mistook my mother for my sister can you believe it?”

The younger woman’s response is a laugh and a “I definitely can.”

However it seems like his mother isn’t the mood for jokes since she crosses the room to get next to Lance’s bed. She strokes his hair and the motherly touch on his forehead melts Lance into a puddle.

“Shi- _I mean_\- Mr. Shirogane called and said you got into a fight which we are definitely talking about at home,” her face wrinkles in worry. Lance feels horrible for causing this negativism to his mom. “But for now – are you okay, _amor_?”

But before he can answer, nurse Grace simply explains everything she’s said to Lance before that and Lance is glad she took the reins of the conversation. He isn’t so keen on talking much right now. The whole time she talks, the older woman looks even more worried with each passing sentence. Lance didn’t even think it was possible, but there she was – his mother radiating so much worry that he was sure that the birds outside have felt it. He catches his mom’s hand into his own and holds it against his forehead. She barely spares him a glance, but Lance catches the tiny smile she delivers him. Her full attention is back on the nurse so Lance comfortingly squeezes the smaller hand.

“-basically that’s all the info.” At last the nurse finishes and puts both her hands in the pockets of her white apron. “Miss Carillo you just have to sign this paper that you’ve been informed about your son’s condition and what to do and then you’re both free to go.” She smiles sweetly at them.

“Yes, of course…” She gives a quick kiss to his bandaged knuckles and lets go of him so she can draw the signature on the tablet nurse Grace is outstretching at her.

With great difficulty Lance gets up, but this time manages to stand on his feet without someone else steadying him.

“Thank you so much for taking care of my son, Miss Grace.” His mother says and hands the device back to its owner.

Nurse Grace nods her head in acknowledgment. “It’s what I do for a living.” Then she shrugs with a sweet smile. “But you’re welcome.”

“Yes, thank you so much for patching me up and not letting me fall on my ass earlier.”

“I must say it was most certainly a difficult task, but I’m glad I managed.” Her voice is serious, but both Lance and his mother can clearly see the mirth in her green eyes.

They say their goodbyes and Lance silently follows his mother in the hallway. It’s past school time and the fluorescent lights hurt his eyes a bit so he keeps his head down. His mother says nothing when they get out and in contrast with the mostly empty parking lot – their dark blue Honda is sticking out like a black mark on a white sheet. They get into the car wordlessly and Lance silently gazes to the left to see his mother putting on the seatbelt and starting the car. She doesn’t look mad, but he still feels as if there’s something he’s not seeing. Missing a piece of the puzzle. The car comes to life and the tune of a song from the radio reaches his ear. The song is unfamiliar, but Lance doesn’t bother to listen to the lyrics.

Unwillingly he goes back to his talk with James before he punched him.

_“You like best of both worlds, huh Ramirez? Who would’ve thought?”_

He thinks of Keith, who doesn’t know the actual truth. He thinks of Allura that doesn’t either, but thinks she does. He thinks of his friends, of Shiro, of his mother who don’t know the truth about him. And they never will, if he doesn’t tell them. That part of him that he’s hid for so long is already taking too much space inside his body, itching to get out.

He presses the button to roll the window down a bit, his heated up face welcoming the chill of the air outside. He looks at his mother again. She looks relaxed, but Lance also notices she holds the wheel too tight. Would it be worth it at the end? Lying to his mother? The person that makes Lance want to be the best son, brother, man he aspires to be.

Lance sighs and looks at the window. Thumps his head on the glass.

They stop on a red light and the Cuban boy finally masters the courage to speak.

“Mom, I get it if you’re mad, but the silent treatment sucks.”

He still doesn’t dare to look at her, but he starts feeling her eyes falling on him. He fidgets on his seat.

“I’m…” she sighs, “I’m not mad Lance.”

“You’re not?” Confusion takes over and he turns on his left, gaping at his mom. His mother rarely gets angry even when lately Lance has been pissing her off more than usual. He expected yelling, angry and disappointed words, groundings, but now looking at her he can’t trace any of these negative emotions on her face.

“Leandro, amor, you’re my _child_ – I know _you_. You’re not hot headed or violent, quite the opposite actually. You’re peaceful and patient and very… _very_ rarely someone can actually get you really angry.”

The light turns green and the car starts moving again. What his mother said is accurate, _obviously_ and Lance feels his heart growing if possible even fonder for the woman next to him.

“I’ve never received a call about you getting into a fight before. Luis tended to be a bit of a troublemaker when he was young, Marco bit a kid in kindergarten – same for Veronica and Rachel, but never you, Lance.” Her window also gets down and his mother leans her elbow on the handle, only one strong hand on the steering wheel. “You can imagine how surprised I was when I picked up the phone and Shiro told me you’ve gotten into a _fight_.”

There is a tiny silent pause and Lance holds his breath.

“My mind just can’t get wrapped on what would actually make you so mad you’d go for a punch,” she pauses again, sighs tiredly and asks that question Lance has been afraid to answer ever since he woke up in the nurse’s office, “_what happened_, Lance?”

They stop in front of their house and the engine is still purring, but Lance feels like throwing up. He has an answer, he just doesn’t want to give it. He massages his forehead and grimaces. He really should take painkillers and go take a nap. He feels like complete and utter shit. He wants to tell his mom, but the words don’t come out.

“Mom I’m-… I’m sorry.” He doesn’t give any other explanation and exits the car. He’s not a complete brute and goes to the garage so his mother can get in, but after he types the password he doesn’t miss any seconds and immediately goes into his house. He takes off his shoes and hangs his jacket. Lance hears the sound of the TV and when he looks towards the couch he locks eyes with Rachel who looks so comfortable in an oversized hoodie, sweatpants and fuzzy socks. Her curly hair is in a bun and Lance tries to resist to go there, bury himself in her arms and cry.

Her eyes inspect the shape his face is in and his bandaged arm and she quickly gets off her position. Worry takes over her features while she marches towards him. He meets her mid-way as her hands carefully touch his face.

“_Oh hermano, que te paso?”_(Oh brother, what happened?) She takes his arm in her hands and brings it in front of her gaze. Her coffee-like eyes roam to everywhere else clearly looking for more injuries and when she doesn’t find any, she looks at him again. She nods her head at the counter. “_Hunk vino hace una hora y dejó tus cosas. Le pregunté por qué, pero él tampoco lo sabía._” (Hunk came an hour ago and left your things. I asked him why, but he didn't know either.)

“_Estoy bien. Me acabo de pelear con Griffin._” (I’m okay. I just got into a fight with Griffin.)

He takes her hand that’s on his cheekbone and kisses it lightly. He makes a move to get out of her hold, but she doesn’t let him.

“_¿Por qué?_” (Why?) Her gaze hardens and she probably thinks Lance was the victim. Would she accept that her twin was the one who couldn’t control his nerves and punched Griffin first? It was stupid to think that, she’s his family after all, but some part of Lance still expected anger from what he’s done. Was he satisfied that he punched him? He was. But he wasn’t happy he didn’t act like the bigger person in the situation. He wouldn’t be surprised if some classmates refused talking with him after that fiasco.

The door opened and since Lance knew it was his mom he didn’t bother to turn around, except for Rachel who raised on her tippy toes (ha, shorty) to see who entered.

Her grip on his body falters and Lance takes the opportunity to break away. He heads towards the counter so he can open his black backpack. He takes his phone from his secret inside pocket. There aren’t many notifications which means no one has received the news yet. At least he hopes. He shoots Allura a text to meet him at the park in Oriande. He doesn’t wait for her reply, because he already heads towards his room to change. He hears Rachel calling his name out, but he doesn’t pay her any attention.

Maybe it was time for Lance Ramirez to stop lying to the people he loves.

{ * }

Lance knows that it’s not okay to sit on the bench like that right now, with his ass perched on the backseat, but it’s hard to actually care at the moment so he just lets it to be. It’s not like there are many people outside right now anyway. A glance at the phone he’s holding in his hand tells him that it’s 5:43PM which means the sun is going down soon.

From this position, however, Lance sees almost everything. There are two kids on the swings, their happy chattering and challenges reminding him of his siblings. Two boys and three girls playing with dolls, buckets and shovels in the sand. A lot of parents watch the dogs in the dog area playing, the kids cheering whenever a dog does something slightly impressive or adorable. Two women are laughing with a little boy and the bubbles he’s blowing through a plastic circle. One of them is running away playfully as if she’s actually afraid. It causes the boy to giggle and walk clumsily towards her when she dramatically falls on the blanket they’ve spread. The other woman grabs the boy and kisses his cheek and then falls next to her wife (or girlfriend). They lean for a kiss and Lance looks away. It’s too intimate and pure. He wonders if he’ll get to experience this one day. The mere joy of having a kid and playing with them and the love of his life next to him.

A vision of Keith appears in his mind and for the first time in so long Lance lets himself daydream a little bit further. Would Keith have a longer hair in ten or fifteen years? He’s mentioned he wants to grow it out, but opinions change through time. Although if Lance has to be honest – Keith with a long braid is definitely a sight he wants to witness in the future. Would Lance be one of the best players in the league? Would someone special other than Keith appear in his life?

_Unlikely_, he scoffs at himself mentally.

He thought Plaxum was the one, he thought Allura was going to be the special girl in his life and yet imagining his best friend with a kid, _their kid_, is the only acceptable option in his brain. Lance always thinks and thinks, he runs circles around himself and the end he gets to nowhere. He plops his head into his hands, but after he presses into his swollen eye he immediately backtracks away as he hisses in pain. Instead he rests his forearms on his spread knees and looks on his left.

A brown skinned woman with sunglasses is walking, a golden retriever happily leading her. He can’t help, but silently coo at the sight of the dog. It’s almost as if… _she_ is smiling and oh well Lance is a dog person so he can’t help himself in general when he sees a cute dog. He doesn’t dare to go ahead and pet it, because after a quick observation the woman she’s leading may be blind. One summer he worked as a cashier in a souvenir shop and he’s had his fair share of blind or deaf people. There’s just a specific thing that gives it away. Not that he’s probably right in this case. He’s still not petting that adorable creature, no matter how tempting it is because it’s rude to pet people’s animals without their permission anyways.

For a split second the dog stops right in front of the bench Lance is sitting on and sniffs the air. The woman stops right after her dog does.

“Molly? Is everything alright, girl?”

Her voice is soothing and it strangely reminds him of his mother. She looks old judging by the gray fade he notices in the roots, yet not that old at the same time. She is dressed in dark blue jeans and a black knee-length coat. Her hair is beautifully done – cornbraids in a neat bun. He’s seen Allura with million different hairstyles like this one and he even picked some skills on how to do some himself. He treasures his memories he had with Allura when they were just friends more than he does when they’re actually dating. It bothers him that it doesn’t bother him as stupid as it sounds.

He’s cut off from his memories when suddenly the dog – _Molly_ barks and wiggles her tail.

“What is it?” The woman softly demands, but Molly doesn’t listen and turns hear head towards him. She barks again and before the woman asks again, Molly goes to his bench and puts her front paws on the seat. He smiles at the amusing sight and chuckles under hear his breath. He reaches out a hand, but before he can touch he clears his throat.

“Uhh ma’am she kind of stays here… Can I pet her?” He tries to sound polite enough so she can understand there isn’t anything dangerous happening around her. The woman inclines her head and it’s as if her huge sunglasses look through his soul. A big smile spreads on her face. The tension he didn’t notice was feeling slips away with the relaxation of his shoulders.

“Of course, of course she doesn’t usually stops like that so it caught me off guard.” She laughs quietly.

He scratches the dog behind her ears and tickles under her chin just like Kosmo likes it. He’s not sure if Molly would like the same places, but judging by her exciting tail Lance is definitely doing something right.

“I had my suspicions – she looks like a guide dog.” He says hesitantly, but there’s still a smile on his face.

“Then I certainly _don’t see_ a point in telling you I’m blind.”

A snort escapes his mouth before he can stop it. He look with brief panic at the woman, but when he sees her smiling – he can’t help, but laugh loud.

“Was… was _that_ a blind pun ma’am? Because if it was, you might just be my favorite person from now on.” He hopes he doesn’t come off as some kind of creep. However this woman seems dope as hell and Lance doubts she’ll be put off by something by a comment like this.

“Then I guess you have to join the club, sweetie.” She wiggles her eyebrows playfully and Lance bursts in laughter once again. If he’s not like this when he gets old then he’ll be really disappointed.

She gestures towards the bench with a finger and asks him if it’s okay to sit down, Lance immediately makes space for her while he replies with a ‘sure!’. Molly climbs between them and Lance keeps stroking her. Kosmo is still his best boy, but Molly can be his best girl. Though he doubts he’ll see the dog and her owner soon after that. Oriande Park is not that far away from where lives, however the Kral Zera has more sport courts and Lance prefers it only for that. Oriande is peaceful and perfect for dates or relaxing walks. It’s definitely more beautiful than Kral Zera and has more entertainments such as summer films, occasional exhibitions, restaurants and other stuff like that. He knows Keith adores this place and Lance would be lying if he didn’t imagine taking him out on a date here. Maybe on July the 6th when it’s the World Firefly Day and it’s celebrated every year in this park. He’s been going on it every year ever since he came to the States and it’s extremely romantic. Imagining Keith cuddled to his side as they watch all the bugs lighting around them is a blissful fantasy he’s never letting go.

“I’m Michelle.” She extends a hand and Lance clasps it from above. Her grip is strong, but Lance notices how soft her hand is. He’s about to ask her what hand cream she’s using when her name suddenly reminds him of something. He breaks into a grin.

“_Michelle, ma belle, these are words that go together~_” He starts singing the intro of the song ‘Michelle’ by The Beatles. His mom really loved listening to lots of artists before even her own mother was born when they were living Cuba and Lance always saved the songs that made an impression on him. He hasn’t listened that song in so long, but he bets all of his savings under his bed that he reminisced the lyrics correctly.

He watches as Michelle’s mouth drops in an offended ‘o’. “Oh don’t you dare! You don’t know the amount of times I’ve had people singing this to me whenever I introduce myself,” she groans loudly, but Lance can see clear as a day that this is all an act.

“But that song’s a classic!” Lance defends while playing along with her.

“That song is older than your grandmother and great grandmother combined,” she deadpans and Lance huffs a laugh once again and shakes his head at her exaggerating, though he’s not in a place to judge considering how dramatic his ass is.

“I’m Lance.” He lets out after and he sees how eyebrows go up in surprise. Is she not believing people are named like that anymore? Names are getting weirder with every decade. Just look at Lotor. Or Acxa, or Zethird. Some parents were definitely on crack when they were choosing a name. Lance was certainly not the weirdest shit she’s heard c’mon…

“Do you by any chance know someone know named Keith?” She asks, her voice careful and hesitant as if it’s a little kid testing the waters on the beach.

“Yeah one of my best friends is named like that…” he shares his own fair share of carefulness, “_do you_?”

“I do,” she replies, “are we talking about the same Keith? Keith and Kosmo?”

“That’s him!” He exclaims with a snap of his fingers. “Small world, isn’t it?”

“Oh for sure. He comes by often and we talk a lot. Kosmo and Molly certainly like each other.” She chuckles and puts a hand on her dog. Lance glances down and notices a wedding ring on her finger. It’s silver and there is a tiny black crystal sparkling nicely. It may actually not be a wedding ring at all, but so far all of his assumptions about Michelle were right. There is a place on her wrist where the skin is not as dark as the rest and Lance can barely see the borders of something she’s worn before.

“I’m not surprised. Keith absolutely loves it here.” His voice is disgustingly fond and quiet, and the Cuban boy hopes Michelle doesn’t notice the soft tone.

The woman doesn’t answer, but hums in affirmation that she’s heard what he said. They sit like that for maybe minutes or so and everything is so peaceful that Lance fears that he’ll actually fall asleep. A quick check at the time – 5:56 – and he’s not so calm anymore. He told Allura to meet him at six and the time is creeping way too quick for his likeness. Lance’s heart starts slowly increasing its beating and it rushes to his ears and cheeks. He feels like everything is too itchy, his body is too small for this park or too big for this tiny bench. His palms starts sweating so he rubs them on his jeans and he looks around, searching for a similar silver hair. Is he even able to do it? To break Allura’s heart? To watch her eyes fill with tears and her face to crumble in misery and heartbreak? He’s sure about not wanting to stay in that relationship, but he’s not sure about hurting one of his greatest friends? Were they going to stay friends after this? Was he going to ruin the dynamic of their group by doing this? What if she never looked at him again with that wicked look and excited gleam, passionate about gymnastics, dancing and fashion? Were they going to gossip and go to the coffee every Saturday like they always did? Was he making a huge mistake? His eyes go unfocused or blur with tears (Lance can’t tell) when all of a sudden a warm hand settles on calf.

“My, my you’re shaking the whole bench with that jittering you’re doing.” Michelle pulls him out of the brief panic he’s having for a while. Lance furrows his eyebrows and looks at his leg in confusion when he realizes he’s been bouncing his legs.

“Jeez I’m _so_, _so_ sorry.” He apologizes and feels like a complete asshole for annoying that woman who probably wanted to have a refreshing spring walk in the park, sat next to a teenage boy she thought was polite enough because they have a mutual friend and what she gets? A teenage boy that’s a ball full of anxiety, because he’s not strong enough to break up with his girlfriend. He almost wishes Griffin was here so he could punch Lance again.

“Oh boy, Keith sure was right about you being an overthinking person. It’s okay, sweetheart, we don’t judge in here.” She pats him on the calf and pulls away. “If you want, you can talk about it.”

Lance is baffled over how she’s ready to listen to his pangs and maybe offer an advice. She literally met him minutes ago and already offers a crying shoulder? Great, even a woman who can’t see can sense how much of a pathetic idiot Lance is. However what gets out of his mouth is not ‘_Oh thanks, but I don’t want to annoy you with my angsty problems_’ but rather a,

“Keith has talked to you about me?”

The Cuban boy almost slaps his forehead in despair. He literally can’t sound any better than a desperate boy who gets excited like some puppy over the fact that his crush has talked about him with someone. Which is… exactly what Lance is. Huh.

Michelle grins and Lance doesn’t like it.

“Oh _he does_ – he talks about all of his friends and family. But mainly about you or his brother. Or school.” She makes a pause and smirks as if she’s about to say something very dangerous. “He mentioned that James boy, his boyfriend, a couple of times too now when I think about it…”

Lance grumbles angrily under his nose at the mention of that asshole’s name. “He isn’t his boyfriend anymore. They broke up.”

Michelle must hear the immediate change in his voice and immediately addresses it.

“You don’t really sound like you like him much,” she deadpans, “but to be fair I didn’t like him either.” She shrugs at the end.

“Have you met him?” Lance can’t help, but feel pissed if Keith brought that son of a bitch to meet this cool woman. Why not _him_? They’ve been friends for what, four years and Keith never bothered to mention he occasionally met up with a woman with an adorable dog whom makes blind puns? Was Keith serious?

“Nah I haven’t, but he should be thankful about it. I would’ve definitely said something that Keith wasn’t going to like.”

They laugh together and Lance feels like he’s finally found the perfect person he can shit talk about James to without being judged. He threw some comments before regarding him, but that was before he found out how much of an asshole he actually is.

“But just to stay between us”, she continues, mischief in her voice and Lance leans just a bit towards her as if she’s going to share some dirty secret, “I’m happy Keith is rid of this boy. He sounded like a major shitass.”

“Oh please, Michelle my belle,” Lance wheezes, “major? This city can barely fit how much of an arrogance this guy composes! He’s like a pompous peacock.”

He shakes his head in amusement. Man, it feels good to talk dirty about him. Rarely he talks such things about people he knows, but he punched him today. He basically broadcasted about how much he dislikes that dumbass with that fight he caused. Cat is out of the bag anyways. No trying to hide it anymore. Shiro will try to convince him to handle his presence for the sake of the team, like he used to, and Lance knows he’ll bend. But there are three months until they graduate so it’s not going to be for long. Lance just hopes they don’t kick him out or for Altea to cancel him.

He’s about to spit more jokes regarding James when a familiar voice yells his name from his right.

“Lonce!” He turns towards his girlfriend and puts a smile on his face, though it probably must look like a grimace.

“Who’s that?” Michelle asks curiously, but Lance keeps his eyes trained on Allura. She’s in her favorite grey thighs, a pastel pink crop top that shows off her abs and the small jewelry she pierced on her navel two years ago when she was sixteen. She has put an oversized hoodie that’s not zipped and her hair is in a fluffy ponytail, bouncing with every step she takes. The fact that his heart doesn’t speed up as it used to when Allura looked like his perfect daydream of a sporty girlfriend makes him even surer that what Lance is doing is right. He doesn’t love her anymore. Hell Lance is even not sure if he ever truly romantically _loved_ her or his crush has always been his fantasies and expectations projecting onto her, making her look like the unreachable girl that he was never going to have, because he wasn’t good enough. The princess that was kicking asses that everyone was fawning over, because what was there not to like?

“That’s Allura,” he finally tells Michelle, “she’s my… she’s my girlfriend.”

“Ah…” Lance doesn’t catch the tiny disappointment in her voice.

“Well then I’m going – I don’t want to be annoying the two young birds in love.”

Lance’s face falls into sad grimace now and he almost winces at the implication that he, that _they_ are in love. Michelle gets up from the bench. Molly whines, but follows right after Lance ruffles the short, thin hairs on her neck. Lance is about to say goodbye, when Allura finally arrives at his side and kisses his cheek sweetly. It’s on his right so she doesn’t see the black eye and Lance isn’t keen to explain the whole situation if Allura doesn’t know about it.

“Hey.”

“Hi. I’ve missed you all day and I barely saw you after PE.” She nuzzles in his neck and lays her head on his shoulder. Her fluffy curly hair presses into his nose and the smell of her coconut shampoo is familiar.

The sound of Molly’s bell makes him look at Michelle who is cleaning the backside of her coat.

“Ah yes. Allura this is Michelle. Michelle – Allura.”

“Good evening ma’am.” Allura greets happily.

“Wow I haven’t heard a british accent in so long, where are you from?”

Allura laughs and Lance hopes she’s not annoyed or something. When Allura came to their school she was mocked by some kids about her accent. Lance, and the majority of the students, frankly thought this was the stupidest thing ever since there are a lot of students who come from all kind of countries and continents. At least 70% of the students had a barely visible accent. It was normal and no one cared. Allura, however, quickly got put off by these comments and tried to fix it, but with the support of their friend gang she realized that it was all bullshit. Lance had the amazing opportunity to watch Allura turning from a bit of a shy, but enthusiastic girl to a confident woman, assure of her abilities from the front row. He was certainly proud of how far she’s come.

“I was born in Liverpool, but moved here with my father when I was fourteen.”

“I have visited London, but not Liverpool. It was beautiful and a shame I can’t see it anymore.” She vaguely gestures to her eyes.

“I wouldn’t let my hopes down, ma’am. Technologies are getting advanced with every passing day and I’m sure you can see once again.”

Michelle puts a hand on her chest and a soft smile appears on her face. “I was going to congratulate you on the choice of a boyfriend, but it seems I gotta do this to Lance.”

Lance has the feeling she winks and he smiles silently when Michelle and Allura burst out in laughter.

“I must go now, it was great meeting you Lance and Allura.”

“You too miss Michelle!” Allura says and they both watch as the woman waves at them and continues on her way with Molly, the dawning sun enveloping her in an orange glow that makes look majestic.

“Sooo…” Lance glances her and sees a wicked, playful smile directed him, “what did you wanna talk about exactly?”

_‘Are you planning a date or something mm?’_ Rizavi’s words from today’s practice hit him in the face and Lance bitterly remembers that Allura probably expects a date or a surprise. Stars above, this is getting harder with every passing second.

Her hands that somehow managed to wing around his neck stroke him comfortingly, but it only Lance makes more nervous. He has to do break it down gently for her. He knows Allura is a tough girl, but what kind of friend is he actually if he can make this less painful?

He sighs and takes Allura’s embrace off him and gets up from the now uncomfortable position on the bench. He has the urge to stretch and crack some bones, but it’s really not the time right now. He crosses his arms and once again Lance’s gaze falls again on the two women with the little boy, now asleep between them. They talk and he can feel their love even from here with the way they look at each other, the way they talk – heads bent towards each other as if whatever they’re speaking will be too loud.

“Allura,” he inhales and exhales mentally preparing the little speech he’s been memorizing for days now, “I know after this you’ll get a lot of shit you’d want to say. And I get it – I do. And I know it’s too much asking from the guy who never shuts up, but can I be the only talking for a little? I promise that I’ll try answering every question you have afterwards. But for now I just talk and you listen, okay?”

He turns around and the confusion on her face is slowly killing him. After the mild confusion a worried expression appears and she must see the bruise on his eye now. However she gets over it, nods and makes a motion with her hand to go on.

“This is… really hard for me, just so you know.” He starts scratching his biceps with his index finger and bites his lip.

“So for the past year I had to deal with some questions about myself. To be honest I’m still struggling with it, but it’s definitely easier these past weeks. I-uh… only one person knows, but I still haven’t said it explicitly anyways so I don’t think it counts.” He uncrosses his arms and starts rubbing the back of his neck, trying to look at anything else besides Allura. “The months before we started dating I had a sudden realization about something else. I’d rather not say it, because privacy, but I don’t think it helped me with said problem I mentioned.” He gulps and continues.

“In fact it made it worse,” he winces, “I tried to-… I tried to act like everything was okay and one of the familiar things that has been a bit permanent in my life was me flirting with you. So I sucked it up and kept going with my life. I flirted with you after in so long and all of a sudden you agreed to some date I jokingly proposed?” He laughs hollowly, but Lance knows nor he or she sense any humor in it.

“It was crazy, because for years you’ve been this distant star that I knew I will never reach and I accepted it. I simply accepted that I was never going to be enough for you. So when you accepted the ‘date’ it was…” all of a sudden tears blur his vision so Lance blinks them away quickly. They fall warm on his cheeks, but Lance restrains to touch his face and wipe them away.

“It was too late, ‘Lura. I was already in love with someone else.”

The silence after this is crushing and defeating. He’s jittery all over and anxiety is buzzing through every inch of his skin. He dares to look at Allura and what he sees is what he expected, which doesn’t calm him down at all. Her eyes are filled with unshed tears and she’s holding her fisted sweater paws to her chin as if she’s praying whatever Lance is saying isn’t true. He wishes he could walk forward and hug her, comfort her but he knows it’ll do more damage than good. So he keeps his hands to himself and fiddles with the bandage on his hand.

After for what it feels like hours, he hears a sniffle and the knot in his stomach tightens. He’s hurting one of his best friends. It’s his fault and he can’t do anything about it.

“So,” she sniffs again, this time quieter, “you’re breaking up with me, huh?”

Allura wipes the small amount of liquid on her cheeks with her hoodie and looks expectantly at him.

“I guess I am. I should be apologizing about for these two months, but I have the feeling you’re not going to appreciate it.”

“You definitely shouldn’t.” Strangely she chuckles wetly. “I can’t lie and say I haven’t wished for this to last longer though.”

This time Lance is the confused one and he tilts his head on one side as if Allura’s a painting he’s not understanding and he needs to look at every angle. She simply sits on the bench and pats the seat next to her. She must feel his hesitance, because she scoffs.

“Lance it’s… fine. Trust me if I was angry you would’ve been sent to Jupiter first class already. I deserve my answers, don’t I?”

Lance huffs and takes the seat on her right, which gives her the perfect access to look at his bruised eye and the small bandage on his cheek. She stares at it, inspecting it while Lance simply watches the sunset. Surprisingly the silence is not uncomfortable, but there is definitely the elephant that hasn’t been addressed.

“Do I wanna know?” She asks and Lance only shrugs in response.

“It’s not like you’re not going to understand what happened anyways. I bet it’ll be the main topic at school tomorrow.”

“What happened then?”

She doesn’t touch him and Lance is not sure if he’s grateful or no. It’s a fact he’s a touchy person and thrives on physical contact, but it’d be selfish to want Allura’s after his mother’s and sister’s gave him loving affections when they found the damage on his face. He’s grateful though, because it means that they’re going to be distant for a while and it’s good to do it from early on to avoid messier situations.

“I punched Griffin during basket practice today.” Lance mutters and looks at Allura who’s still inspecting his injury.

Confound finds a place on her beautiful features and her eyes widen. “You got into a fight with the mayor’s son? Lance have you lost your mind?! Mrs. Ryner can suspend you or even worse – Altea can kick you out!”

She’s panicking and Lance, maybe for a moment, hopes he thought wrong about how he wouldn’t stay friends with Allura. What were four years of friendship compared to two months of dating?

_Two months almost ruined your relationship with Keith_, his mind doesn’t fail in reminding him. And it’s true. A lot can happen in two months, but Lance can still hang on the vine of hope unless Allura decides to cut it off.

“I know, I know trust me it’s been on my mind ever since I woke up in the nurse’s office.”

A moment passes and all of a sudden Lance hears a snort next to him. Astonished, the Cuban boy looks at Allura and finds her smiling in her fist. If Lance could communicate with pictures he’d write a big – no _huge_ – question mark on top of his head. Allura only shakes her head after she meets his eyes.

“I can’t believe you got into a fight with Mr. _Sad Bang_, oh my goddess-“

She starts full on laughing and honestly? It’s kind of creeping him out. Lance expected anger, sadness, tears, yelling, maybe a jab in the ribs. Lance surely didn’t expect an Allura with her head thrown back on the edge of hysteria, face red because of how hilariously she probably imagines a fight between he and James. Just when she calms down she starts laughing even harder than before. At this point he just lets her to let it all out and stares at the sun that’s already starting to hide.

Allura sighs deeply. He mimics her, but they still keep silent. The chattering of the people and the sound of the birds around them is comforting and it’s actually not that bad as Lance expected it to be. It hurts, but it feels like the press against his chest and back are slowly going away – leaving space for the calmness. He feels strangely calm next to the girl that was supposed to represent everything he ever wanted, the happy ending for the knight who was always trying to catch the attention of the princess. He closes his eyes and tips his head back on the backseat and lets the last rays of sun for the day caress his skin. It’s warm. And it gets warmer when a head falls on his left shoulder. The small breeze ruffles his hair and he hasn’t been in peace in a long time. His body relaxes and Lance just … lets it be.

He hears his friend breathing just as relaxed as him, but he still suppresses the urge to throw a hand over her shoulders. _It’s hard_, he thinks, to suddenly stop being familiar with someone who are used to being affectionate with.

“Is it bad of me to say I expected this?” Allura’s voice makes him open his eyes, but they stay glued to the sky above him. “From the moment we started dating I knew you didn’t have your whole heart in it, but I just thought you were nervous.” She shrugs sadly.

“I mean…” he begins, “I still had a small crush on you. But instead of my feelings growing with every kiss and hug – they got even less to the point I didn’t feel anything towards you. Romantically. You’re still one of my closest friends and I love you-”

Allura shifts next to him and from the corner of his eye he sees her drawing her knees onto her chest.

“But I’ll understand if you won’t want to speak with me again.”

She immediately scoffs. “Lance, I’d rather eat my own arm.”

That pulls an unexpected laugh out of Lance and he feels bad for bothering Allura with the shake of his shoulders, but he hears her laughing too so maybe she doesn’t really mind.

“Of course I’d need some distance and time for me to cry it all out and get over it, but as you said, you’re still one of my closest friends too, Lance. I’m not letting you go so easily, just because a relationship between us didn’t work.”

“You-… you aren’t mad?” He looks down at her, bewilderment in his voice.

Her forehead wrinkles. “I’m more disturbed that you didn’t tell me. Maybe if you told me at the beginning you were already in love with someone we could’ve avoided this mess,” regret quickly replaces everything, “_not_ that I didn’t absolutely adore my time with you. You’re one of the best partners I’ve had. But I can’t help, but think it would’ve been easier for you.”

“‘Lura,” he huffs and rolls his eyes, “I literally broke up with you and you feel bad for _me_? What is wrong with you?”

“What’s wrong with me is that I want you to be happy,” with her right hand she grabs his chin so he can look her directly in the eyes, “even if it’s not with me.”

She lets him go and looks away, but Lance doesn’t.

“I don’t deserve you,” he mutters.

“You gotta stop with that toxic mindset, Lance,” she sounds kind of angry now – oh no, “we’re people, not some kind of presents. We’re both amazing, wonderful people and we both deserve love and appreciation. It’s not about deserving, it’s about loving each other and accepting that it’s not always going to be pretty as long as you’re willing to fight for the relationship. So stop with that ‘_I don’t deserve you_’ bullshit it’s really unhealthy.”

Lance is not even surprised anymore whenever she spits wisdom like she’s solving math questions for first graders.

“You sound like my mom,” Lance says at the end and smiles at the memory of her.

“I hope I do, she’s a remarkable woman. You _do_ know how lucky you are that you have such a mother, right?”

At times like these Lance thinks of how Keith and Allura are two parts of the same coin. Both are fierce, stubborn, protective, kind and beautiful inside out and wow Lance really has a type huh? They have their major differences too, but one thing is that both know what it feels like to grow up without a parent. Or in Keith’s case – without parents through all of his childhood. They know the pain so it’s not surprise to the Cuban boy that they both fully adore Luna Carillo and never fail to mention how much they both find her extraordinary. Not that Lance disagrees, it’s just something he noticed and it’s frankly adorable.

So at the end Lance only replies with, “I know.”

Allura eyes him and Lance almost shrinks under her gaze.

“You’re not gonna tell me that person you’re in love with, am I right?” Her gaze is “judgemental”, but Lance sees through the masked curiosity well and he can’t help but grin.

“You’re absolutely right.”

“Oh c’mon don’t I deserve to know?”

“I’m not saying shit.”

“You are the biggest-”

“That’s what she said.”

“…”

“…”

“I hate you.”

“You’re smiling.”

“I’m not-“

“You are!”

“Oh shut up.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAnd that's a wrap!
> 
> lmao, i'm pretty proud of this chap actually and i hope u guys loved as much as i did while writing it. a few words before u hit that exit button :
> 
> \- the fight between lance and james was extremly hard to write and idk why lmao. to the people who study medicine or work in that area - apologies if something was incorrect!
> 
> \- unpopular opinion or idk i just wanna say it because it's been on my mind ever since i started watching voltron and joined the fandom - i sometimes dislike the way some authors make allura this unreachable person that can't connect with the paladins. some make her look above lance which hurts me deeply, because they're both beautiful and complex characters and i hate when ppl disregard lance in fics just because she's supposed to be the "princess" and cant return his feelings only because lance is "just a boy from cuba". allura isnt so shallow pls!! irl yall know they would've tottaly dated, but (imo tho because klance r soulmates) broke up because they'd know they're better as friends. 
> 
> \- And FINALLY im sorry i'm not even sure if people will answer, but i'm already thinking of ideas for a new fic since this one is on its end and i wanna share what i have in mind! if you want to see one of them happening just comment the number it would be really appreciated !
> 
> 1\. A canon divergence fic (multi chapter) where it's forbidden for paladins to fall in love due to "space madness". Whoever has read the shadowhunter books just imagine it as a parabatai bond. You fall in love - you slowly lose ur sanity. Ofc main couple is Keith and Lance and i should probably mention that this is the fic that has been the most planned so far in terms of headcanons and stuff like that. 
> 
> 2\. A Celebrity AU (which will be one shot) that takes inspiration from bruno mars's music video for 'versace on the floor'. keith (as zendaya) is a male model and lance (bruno) wants him for his sexy music video, but knows it's impossible. they've met before on parties and lance has definitely fancied him. so what will happen when Pidge (his manager) tells him he has a surprise for him? ;)))
> 
> 3\. The Last of Us AU (multi chapter). Idk how many of you know about the video game. If there are any PS4 owners and you havent played this masterpiece - dO IT. u wont regret it. for the people that dont know - this is going to be at apocalyptic world where the world is infected (how ironic) because of a fungus that attacks the brain. Keith is a smuggler and has a mission from Nyma, the queen of the Fireflies, to smuggle illegaly something out of the city. Or rather someone. Lance who by the way is immune. Keith as Joel and Lance as Ellie. Ofc i'd change the major things such as the age and gender (obviously lmao) and it's going to be romantic ofc. I'll still add my own headcanons and ideas so i only take inspiration from the infected, the Firefly group and the backstory of Keith's character. 
> 
> 4\. A Fantasy/Supernatural AU (multi chapter) with Keith as a vampire and Lance as a werewolf. i have ideas, but this is the least planned fic from all of these, but if it's the most wanted i will start it right away :D
> 
> THATS it basically. Tell me what u think (or not heeee) and i'll take any ideas or proposes. im an open minded girlie ;))  
and once again, wash ur hands
> 
> I LOVE U AND THANK U FOR OVER 1000 HITS I APPRECIATE EVERY SINGLE ONE OF U <3333


	5. 'cuz you carried me with you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I’m in love and it’s not with her. I told her so and yeah… It feels wrong to want someone else while you’re in a relationship, you know? Actually, I don’t know if you get me, but-“
> 
> “I do.”
> 
> A pause.
> 
> “I do,” he repeats, “more than you know.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MY BEAUTIFUL LOBELIES HELLOOO!!
> 
> i am so sorry with the late chapter AND for the fact that this is not the final, because my plan was for this to be the final of this story, however when i finished i realized how important as a whole these moments are so it feels more right for this to be a single chapter. this is pretty self-indulgent ngl, but i still hope u love it as much as i did writing it!
> 
> ENJOY! <3

8 years ago – October 2047

_“You did what?!”_

_Keith immediately winces under Shiro’s hard grey gaze and tries not to drop the box that Kosmo is in, although judging by how weak his arms are he has to let it down soon. He looks down at his feet and call him crazy, but it’s still surprising to see that he has clean shoes that are not third hand ruffled by all the kids before him. It’s hard – getting used to not having much while sharing most of it with all the other orphaned kids – to suddenly having his own room, new clothes, a roof above his head, a meal every day and two people that actually might care about him. _

_Keith has been living in Arus in the state Texas for six months now and this is his third fight ever since he started school. He didn’t expect fourth grade to be that hard, especially when he’s still grasping on the language and not to mention his birthday is after two weeks. Which means that he’ll probably spend it with Shiro and Adam, because he hasn’t bothered to talk with any of his classmates. Not because he doesn’t want to per se, Keith just feels like he doesn’t have to have any friends. He’s completely content with the life he’s living right now which is more than enough than he has ever hoped to have. Shiro is nice, Adam too and he’ll possibly have _ _а _ _dog soon added into this little family that somehow wants him. Inviting another person into his life is a no no._

_“I brought a dog.” He repeats and he dares to look at his cousin under his bangs that were actually trimmed one week ago. Sadly, his eyes are visible to the entire world._

_Shiro sighs and scratches the scar on his nose that Keith is still afraid to ask about how he got. He briefly wonders if it’s from the same catastrophe in which Shiro had to have his right arm amputated. He knows that his second cousin is a famous athlete judging by all the medals, prizes and the framed basketball jerseys. Not to mention that when they go outside there are _at least_ five people who will stop and ask for an autograph or a picture. He’s had some classmates asking if it’s cool living with _The_ Takashi Shirogane, the Champion or whatever nickname Shiro has gained by the years. Keith’s only answer is either a shrug or a one word answer. _

_And then he’s wondering why no one bothers to speak with him._

_Keith patiently waits on the entrance, but when Kosmo barks and wiggles in the same box he found him – the black haired boy lets himself to finally put it on the ground. His arms are sore and they hurt, but it’s worth it if Shiro and Adam get to see what an adorable puppy Keith will have. And he will have that puppy. He’s _not_ abandoning that poor animal on the streets._

_At the end Shiro only looks at Keith then down at the box in which Kosmo has already managed to open, his fluffy little head now visible. Shiro’s eyes soften and Keith follows to see that Kosmo has let out his tongue and is cutely panting, head inclined on the side. How can anyone resist this face?_

_“ADAM!” All of a sudden Shiro yells out behind him. Keith hears a faint ‘what’ coming out from the inside and he braces himself for Adam’s anger. While the both of them are one of the calmest people he’s met, Keith still doesn’t like them mad. It makes him feel guilty, that perhaps they’ll see how he is not worth the trouble and will book him a plane back to Seoul._

_He hears soft steps approaching and Adam must come, but Keith can’t see anything since Shiro’s huge figure takes up all the space. Then a hand pulls his cousin’s shoulder away and there he is. Adam is still in his military uniform – he is in the Air Force, a fighter pilot. He has a black shirt on, but he’s still in the dark camouflage green pants. Keith hasn’t told anyone, but being a fighter pilot looks way cooler than being a famous basketball player._

_“What is it- oh no Keith, did you get into a fight again?” Keith is surprised to see actual worry, instead of anger. They both have scolded him over the past three fights he’s had and Keith _knows _it’s bad, he knows, yet there are still kids that will get on his nerves and will test his temper. Something that happened today, but he’s not regretting that punch – Jayden is a jerk and he deserved it for bothering him and his classmate. Before Keith can respond, Shiro beats him to it._

_“We’ll talk about that in minutes, but first look at this.” And he points at the black carton box. Adam furrows his eyebrows and looks at where his husband is pointing at. At the sight of Kosmo, the man coos and crouches down._

_“What a cute puppy,” his hand emerges and immediately starts petting the little animal. Kosmo barks happily and obviously basks under all the attention. “Did you find…” a quick glance, “…him?”_

_Keith feels a smile spreading over his face and he nods enthusiastically. “I heard noises and went to see. I found him in this box and decided to take him with me here. Can we please keep Kosmo?”_

_“Great, he’s already named him,” Shiro throws his hands in exasperation, “he’s attached now no turning back.”_

_Adam keeps baby talking Kosmo, calling him good boy and scratching him behind the ears, ignoring the whining of his husband. _That’s good_, Keith thinks. If he has Adam on his side Shiro will definitely give in. He tries not to jump in joy at the possibility of keeping Kosmo with him. He knows that pets need a lot of care and love, but Keith thinks if the puppy already likes him then Kosmo won’t have a problem about the affection. Looking at Adam – the doggie would be even spoiled with that much love._

_“What’s the problem if we keep him, Kashi?” Adam looks up from Kosmo even though his hand doesn’t leave the puppy’s head. Just now Keith notices he doesn’t have his glasses now and Keith always gets weirded out how different he looks without them. He looks younger somehow. The tiny glasses kind of make him seem more serious than he actually is._

_His cousin rolls his eyes and leans on the door frame while he crosses his muscular arms. “I don’t have a problem with keeping him. It’ll just seem like a reward when he actually did something bad today.” He gestures with his prosthetic arm towards Keith’s swollen eye. _

_Keith looks down at Kosmo in shame, but his gaze happens to fall on Adam instead. The man is frowning while looking at his injury and Keith has the urge to look away, but he stands his ground and lets Adam examine him. At Shiro’s words however his face changes._

_“Did you read that bullsh- nonsense in that stupid book?” He deadpans and gets up from his crouched position. Shiro’s mouth opens in offense._

_“It’s not stupid!” He defends. “It’s written by one of the best child psychologists out there, you’re just salty that you didn’t think of reading it before me.”_

_Adam huffs in fake annoyance, but still leans to kiss his husband on the cheek. Shiro quickly turns so his lips fall on Shiro’s rather on the place Adam wanted. Keith glances away at tender moments like these. The both men have found a path into his heart slowly with the time he’s been here, but it still feels wrong to witness their love up close and personal. When he hears the distant smack that means that they’ve stopped (_gross_) he still doesn’t dare to look up. Instead he kneels and pats Kosmo once again with a grin. The small puppy tries to lick his face, but the black haired boy manages to dodge. Not that he minds – it’s just that he’s still a stray animal. The teacher at his school always says how important vaccinations are to both, humans and animals. _

_“C’mon Keith get in and wash your hands.” Shiro urges all of a sudden._

_“B-but Kosmo-“ he starts protesting, but before he can finish a heavy hand settles on his head and ruffles his hair._

_“-is going to the vet.” Adam interrupts. “We have to check if he has a microchip which I doubt he does. Then he has to stay in a shelter for a little bit so we can adopt him legally.”_

_Keith doesn’t know what a microchip is, but it sounds like something important and serious so he nods in understanding. And he can wait if it means he’ll have Kosmo with him. He takes off his shoes and hurries inside the house faster than a lightning. He thoroughly washes his hands since he touched Kosmo a lot. He leaves his backpack on the couch instead in his room, which drives Shiro nuts, but right now Keith could care less. He gets just a bit distracted of his favorite show on the TV, but when Adam calls out his name he turns it off and puts on his shoes. He gets in the big black car and immediately buckles up before Adam tells him to. From the window he sees Shiro locking the door of the house. He skips all the tiny stairs altogether and jogs over. He gets into the driver’s seat and Adam must’ve started the car before him so Shiro only has to put on the belt and drive. _

_Keith’s seat is behind Adam’s so he can’t look at Kosmo and that saddens him. He wishes he could lean forward and grab the puppy in his own arms. The radio is playing some happy to go music and Keith dangles his feet in the rhythm of the beat. They stop at a red light and he leans on his right so he can count the seconds. He doesn’t know why he loves doing that, but ever since he’s been living here it became a habit for him. When it reaches fifty seconds however, Shiro calls from the front seat as he lowers down the volume of the radio. _

_“Now, tell us what happened today. Miss Mukerji called me and told me that some girl came up to her and told her there was a fight in the bathrooms. Care to explain?”_

_Keith brings his eyes upward and catches Shiro looking at him through the rearview mirror. His tone is not really judgmental or angry, but he’s definitely not satisfied. Keith understands him. Keith doesn’t know how would he live if he found out there was some distant cousin of his in another country. And that said cousin whom gets into fights more than he attempts to befriend his classmates. Keith clutches the belt in front of his chest and frowns when he remembers what happened. He doesn’t answer for a while and stares outside. But after some minutes he opens his mouth. _

_“Jayden was teasing this one boy that’s actually nice, Shiro. He always does that. So this time I just punched him.” _

_He nods to himself a little. He’s at least ninety nine percent sure he said that sentence right. Keith often gets annoyed when he doesn’t remember some english words or when he says something wrong and Shiro or Adam have to correct him. Not that he minds – he’s learning every day and gets better at this while he tries not to forget the Korean. Shiro bought five Korean channels so he can watch them from time to time. He was happy when he found out that most of them were kid ones that he used to watch back in the orphanage. One was a musical one and Keith wouldn’t admit it to anyone, but he knows some k-pop songs and listens to them when he happens to be alone. Both, Shiro and Adam, weren’t born here so it feels nice to have them understand his struggle about the language and the new environment._

_“Keith, we’ve talked about this buddy,” Shiro sighs, “you can’t just punch people when you don’t like them.”_

_“But he was being a… a” Keith scowls when he can’t remember the word and restrains not to hit Adam’s seat in anger. What was that stupid word?_

_“A what?” Adam calls out, his tone curious._

_“You know, when someone is rude and you call them like that. Shiro uses it all the time when he watches basketball,” Keith explains and wracks his brain, trying to remember. He rubs a small hand on his forehead as if that will help him faster. _

_“Uhhh idiot?” Shiro tries to help while the car starts moving again and Keith regrets not counting the seconds on the traffic light. _

_“No, that’s when someone is being stupid,” Adam says._

_“Then I don’t know,” Shiro shrugs, “the point is that even when someone is rude there are other ways to bring justice other than violence. This is already your fourth fight ever since you started school back in May. Fourth, Keith…”_

_Shame quickly overtakes him and he shrinks in his seat, still clenching onto the belt even tighter than before. He feels angry tears gathering in his eyes, but he refuses to cry in the car with his guardian and his husband present. Crying is reserved for only late at night when he’s alone in his bed. He’s not crying here, just because Shiro scolds him for doing something that’s actually bad. So he simply sniffles super quietly and hopes no one heard him. _

_“Look Keith,” judging by how Shiro softens his voice, sympathy hearable maybe that sniffle wasn’t as quiet as he thought, “what I’m trying to say is… I know it’s hard to keep your mouth shut when bad things happen. But punching is not going to make it better and I know you know that. You’re smarter than that. Me and Adam have talked about it with you, the teacher has talked about it with you… I just-“_

_Suddenly Shiro sounds upset and choked up, and there’s a split moment when Keith almost unbuckles his belt and goes to him to… what? Comfort him? Hug him? Tell him that he’s sorry about being so stupid and awful, that Shiro deserves a better cousin that makes him smile instead of giving him headaches? Before he can do that however, Adam puts his hand on Shiro’s shoulder and squeezes._

_The car stops and in a daze Keith looks to his right to see that they’ve arrived to the destination. The engine is still purring softly, when Keith does what he thought about and frees himself. The beeping sound alarming that someone is not safe starts and while that annoys him to no end – he has other priorities now. He wobbles with his feet and puts his own hand next to Adam’s in what he hopes is comfort for the other man. He looks over to Kosmo who’s asleep, curled into a tiny ball in the carton box. _

_“What Shiro is trying to say is that if you keep up with this,” Adam begins and Keith slowly looks at him, expecting an angry Adam for upsetting his husband but instead the black haired boy is surprised by the sadness written his face, “the social workers might think we’re not taking good care of you and they’ll take you away from us if that happens.”_

_Fear grabs his heart in a hold and it’s like an invisible hand chokes him around the throat not letting him breathe. Panic begins to travel through his whole body and it prickles like tiny needles. There’s no way they can take him away right? Shiro is his only left relative as far as he knows, they _can’t_ possibly put him in the foster care again?! His heartbeat increases and his vision goes blurry and those must be the tears he was holding in from earlier._ _He doesn’t realize that he’s been holding Shiro way too tight to the point of where his nails dig painfully through the soft material of his shirt._

_“Hey, hey, hey Keith it’s okay buddy let go,” his cousin’s voice pulls him out of the hole he was falling through and a big pale hand falls on top of his. Keith shakes himself and as fast as a lightning he emerges away, but the older man refuses to let go._

_“Oh, I’m so sorry Shiro-“_

_“It’s okay. Listen Akira,” the use of his real name surprises Keith and he finally looks at Shiro who has turned his face towards him. It’s not that Keith doesn’t like his birth name, in fact he thinks it’s cooler than Keith. But when he arrived in this country it felt like he needed a new name, or at least a nickname, in honor of new beginnings. Aki or Kira weren’t his taste, but later on he had heard the name ‘Keith’ here and there, he decided he liked it. Ever since then, everyone who knows him (which isn’t much – only Shiro, Adam and Miss Mukerji) call him Keith. Of course, some of his classmates had picked up on that he responded only to Keith on purpose, so when they needed to ask something they turned to him with said chosen name. For Shiro to use Akira meant that either he’s mad or trying to sound serious and succeeding. Maybe now it is a mix of both._

_“I will never give up on you, do you hear me? I won’t let them take you away nor will Adam. We’re your family and I know you still don’t believe us – but we love you, okay? And we want you here. I know it’s hard and I know your first eleven years in your life weren’t kind to you, but you’re here with us now and that is the most important part. You’re not going back to Seoul or getting in the foster system again. You have my word.”_

_His cousin’s gaze is nothing but truthful and heartfelt, and Keith is still wondering how he got so lucky once again. He still doesn’t let himself cry, but nevertheless slips his small hands around Shiro’s neck as much as the backseat allows him to do so. The smell of his cologne is familiar and the boy buries his nose in the collar of his shirt. He feels a small touch on his head and that must be Adam providing with his own affection._

_“Thank you, Takashi.” Keith returns the gesture with using Shiro’s full name and don’t ask, but he just knows that there’s a huge smile on the man’s face right now._

_“Of course, kiddo. Now let’s start the process of welcoming Kosmo in our family.”_

_._

_Forty minutes later is when Keith, full of freshly bathed and vaccinated Kosmo, on their way to the shelter remembers the word._

_“Asshole!”_

_“WHAT?!” Shiro and Adam exclaim at the same time and Keith is surprised how the car doesn’t sway into the wrong direction._

_“The word I couldn’t remember. Asshole! Jayden is an asshole!” Keith smiles big and proud of himself for getting it right._

_“Keith, that’s a bad word and you shouldn’t use it in school,” Shiro accuses and he uses that serious tone of his, but somehow it doesn’t actually do anything to Keith’s pride. _

_“But you use it all the time, Shiro.” Keith tilts his head on the side, confused._

_“Well, let’s just say Takashi uses words that he shouldn’t most of the time. And you, Keith,” Adam turns around, while his hand is holding Shiro’s backrest and he points at the boy with the other, “aren’t using them until you become older. And even then, you still need to be cautious about what you say around us.”_

_Kosmo barks at that and wiggles his tail at Adam._

_“Kosmo said he doesn’t support that,” Keith announces and pats the puppy on his head gently._

_“Dogs can’t talk,” Shiro buts in._

_“They can,” Keith fires back, “maybe he’ll decide he doesn’t like his name and wants to call him differently? Maybe the gonervent-“_

_“Government,” Adam corrects him._

_“-hides it from us. I once read in the orphanage that they do that a lot. Aliens, dogs talking, even America stepping on the moon! Also did you guys know that there’s this lake monster in Scotland-“_

_And while Keith blabbers, Shiro and Adam link hands and grin softly at each other._

_That boy is definitely worth it._

{ * }

Present Time – April 2055

“He did WHAT?!”

Shiro moves the fingers that have found place on his face and departs them just a bit so he can glare at Keith. Not that Keith blames him though. Because even after the third time his brother has repeated the same statement, his brain still can’t process what he’s heard. Lance in a fight? Lance in a fight. It’s more likely for Hunk to break up with Shay than this! Or- or for Pidge to stop liking ‘Blade of Marmora’! Which, okay, it sounds extreme but Lance? Lance Ramirez? _His_ Lance? In a fight? What kind of cosmic joke is this?

“I think what Takashi said is that Lance got into a fight today,” Adam exclaims from his place on the couch where he’s loudly chewing popcorn and watching some action movie. Keith restrains to not make a face at the noises he’s making. Dammit does he hate people eating loudly, it’s absolutely disgusting.

Shiro makes a wild, pointing gesturing at his husband, “Thank you!”

“I’m sorry I’m just… shocked,” Keith sighs and bends down to pick up the fallen pencil that he dropped after Shiro told him the “news”, “Are we talking about the same Lance?”

“I can certainly remember taking Lance Ramirez to the nurse, Keith.” Shiro deadpans and _wait a fucking minute- nurse_?!

“The NURSE?”

“Can you stop doing that oh my GOD,” Shiro groans. His brother seems too fed up with his bullshit and gets up from his seat on the chair to head towards the fridge. He grabs a bottle of wine and opens one of the cupboards to get himself a glass. Keith can’t really blame him for his choice for a drink even when it’s still 7pm, because the life of a teacher was certainly stressful, especially if today was a catastrophe as Keith thinks.

“What now, can’t I be worried for my best friend?” Keith’s forehead wrinkles and there’s no denying about how slightly pissed off he sounds now.

“Of course you can and I would’ve explained what happened if it wasn’t for you interrupting me when I first told you,” Shiro opens the cap of the bottle and sips himself not too much, but not too little amount of alcohol. The sound of shooting and explosions coming from the TV are not too loud and if Keith ignores it he can even pretend it’s a peaceful spring afternoon where finally the sun doesn’t set too early and he’s just drawing calmly in the presence of his loved ones. The whole kitchen is painted in a soft orange glow, because of the rays the fancy curtains let through and the open window that not only lets the sunset’s shine, but also fresh air. Keith breathes in slowly and tips his head back. His feet are propped on the table which would most of the time earn himself a slap to get them off, but it seems like this is at the bottom of Shiro’s list of worries right now.

Ever since he came back he looked on the edge, with furrowed eyebrows and mouth in a tight line, but Keith didn’t ask. Shiro doesn’t share his problems easily even with his closest friends, but Keith’s heart has always warmed when he and Adam were always the exception. Of course, some things were only left to Adam, but that never bothered Keith. After all, he was his husband that was with him through so many years and troubles and Keith was just… the second cousin that suddenly needed saving. Shiro didn’t have parents either anymore, but he grew up with them in Japan ‘till he was a teenager. After their death in a plane crash, he was left with his grandmother to take care of him. Eventually when he received attention from Altea while he was playing for this one Japanese team, he moved with his grandma here in the States.

_“A shame,”_ Shiro used to say, _“grandma Hanako could’ve told you something about your family, but she died before we found you.”_

The only thing that he is at least 90% sure is that his father was Japanese, since Shiro provided him with his own family tree, but only because Keith was curious. It seemed like Keith’s japanese origins _not_ surprisingly were from his father’s side. Hanako’s sister (Shiro’s grandma) – Natsumi Shirogane – married Masahiko Kogane who were supposedly his grandparents. They probably went to live in South Korea and eventually had his father there. After that, there was no information about who was the descendant of Natsumi and Masahiko. Keith knew if he actually made an effort to dig in to find more about his parents he would eventually one hundred percent find a lead.

However it felt to him that there was no point anymore. His father was dead, according to Shiro who read his file, and there wasn’t any information about his mother except for her name on his birth certificate and that she was Korean. Keith still doesn’t want to mend anything that’s already useless or painful to him. Maybe one day he could go back to Seoul and search. But not now. Especially not now.

So even when he was that second cousin that appeared in Shiro’s life all of a sudden, love was swimming through his whole body when he first realized Shiro was more than just a distant relative – but a _brother_.

“I’m sorry,” he sighs, “I’m just… wow… why didn’t he call me or something?”

He frowns when he remembers about his phone which is actually upstairs, left in his room. So even if Lance called he didn’t know about it. _Shit what if-_

“Hunk took his stuff from the changing room and dropped them off at his house. And he was kind of out of it for a while so even if he wanted he couldn’t have possibly called you.” Shiro explains before his thoughts take a wild turn and mesh his brain into guilt tripping him for not being a good friend once again.

His brother puts the wine bottle back in the fridge and sits again in front of him, but not before he takes a huge gulp from his cup. He plants the glass on the table and Shiro’s prosthetic shows off his statistics and the condition of it. There’s a soft pastel blue light pulsing slowly on the polished metal, while another one travels up and down all the way from his bicep to his wrist mesmerizingly. Keith doesn’t know if Shiro finds his hand beautiful, because he certainly does. While it is linked to a tragedy and pain, Keith wasn’t going to lie and say that he didn’t sketch it from time to time. The design is simply perfect and he’s appreciating the hard work and detail all the student engineers from Altea have put into making it.

“Who did even punch him?” The black haired boy asks out loud.

Who would fight Lance? He’s one of the sweetest, coolest and most amazing guys in the school. Not that Keith would ever tell him that, but he can’t think of anyone who is on his actual bad side. There are of course, some people who probably don’t like him, but physical fighting is an extreme. Which is a bit hypocritical coming from Keith, but he hasn’t been in a fight in over an year and he’s proud of it. But what he meant to say is that fighting is extreme for _Lance_. Though he’d admit that he is really scary (_and sexy_ Keith reminds himself bitterly) when he is mad for real. His jaw clenches and he fists his hands which makes his biceps stand out even better. And his eyes turn from a welcoming blue to an ocean in a storm that could pull and drown you in matter of seconds.

“No, no the question should be… Who did _Lance_ punch?” Shiro says tightly and takes another gulp of wine.

His brain freezes and his mouth opens in surprise. He must look ridiculous, like a fish searching for water, but it feels like all of a sudden his brain is just static. Please hold on. Still Loading. Keith.exe has stopped working.

_What?_

“What??” And that definitely doesn’t come from him. He doesn’t even bother to turn around and look at Adam, he’s still too busy staring at Shiro in what? Confusion? Shock? _Amazement? _“What do you mean? Lance is such a good boy why would he throw punches like Mister Hot Temper right here?”

Keith doesn’t even have it in him to protest. He doesn’t make any noises yet and he’s sure he even forgot how to. What the fuck happened?

“I don’t know!” He’s not sure if he said that part out loud or if he answers Adam, but Shiro groans and starts massaging his forehead roughly. “There was some troubles with O’Connor and Griffin. I talked with them about it and that was it. Then I left for like… two minutes and all of a sudden James is on the ground with a bloodied nose and Lance going at him again, basically fuming with rage! It happened so fast! And then, on our way running midway James punches _him_ and me and Kinkade are on the verge of a panic attack!”

Shiro scratches his scar and leans on his chair to look up at the ceiling. “It was out of nowhere!”

He spreads his arms widely and then he lets them hang loosely as he keeps staring upwards.

“He punched _James_? Is he fucking _crazy_?!” Keith finally finds the words in him to speak up and they aren’t very nice. He bangs his sketchbook on the table angrily while his nostrils flare. Lance worked so hard for this shit and he’d let an idiot like James to ruin everything?! “Ryner can suspend him and Altea might cancel him for it!”

“That’s what I’m worried about the most, to be honest. He’s one of the most promising boys I’ve ever trained in my life and for it to waste away only because the anger got the best of him. What a mess…”

Keith is on the edge of his seat, maybe to go at James’s and beat his ass, because if Lance will punch someone then that’d only happen if he’s strongly provoked. And no one does it any better than James Griffin. Trust him, Keith has met with that shit eating smirk and infuriating bossy tone up close and personal. However, before he can flee, Shiro’s tone all of a sudden hardens and he leans up to rest his forearms on the table.

“Which leads me to one of the things I wanted to talk about. Why didn’t you tell me James was bothering you?”

_Ah_ he gets it. The overbearing brother act – one of the reasons he decided not to tell Shiro and like most of the time Keith is right about it.

“It wasn’t that bad only until today, Shiro,” he huffs, “he followed me here and there the previous week and didn’t leave me alone, but it could’ve been way worse. Today he just got too confronting about it.”

He crosses his arms and copies his brother’s posture as he too leans forward. As if he challenges Shiro on a staring match.

“What did he do?” He demands to know and leaves no room for avoiding the question. Not that Keith would try. If he already knows there’s no point in beating around the bush.

“We were having lunch in the cafeteria and he made a scene in front of everyone. Pidge threatened him and all that and he stormed away with his tail between his legs.” He shrugs.

“Akira,” _uh oh_, “if he didn’t leave you alone after you’ve told him repeatedly times ‘_no_’ is some serious business.”

“See, that’s why I didn’t tell you!” Keith yells and waves a hand at Shiro’s face. “You were probably gonna talk with Ryner and that’d make an even bigger scene! Not to mention that I’m eighteen already, on my way to nineteen, and you’re not always going to protect me like I’m the little kid from the orphanage years ago! I need to,” he huffs loudly, licks his lips while he uncrosses his arms so he can weave them through his hair, “I need to learn how to be depended on myself again, because if I don’t get accepted into Altea I’ll be forced to move out of the city because Naxzela is the only other university I like and so I just…”

He slows his breathing a bit and whispers mentally to himself ‘_Patience yields focus. Patience yields focus. Patience yields focus.’_ The mantra calls him down by a little. He’s not mad at Shiro for caring about him, he just wanted to deal that on his own without feeling like a burden again. Because despite the fact that he knows he has family and friends now, the thought that he’d be alone and abandoned once again scares him even more than before. More than ever, now that he actually has something to lose.

“I just wanted to sort it by myself. If I can’t deal with one stupid ex then why the hell am I considering Altea? This is a big deal for me, you know that,” he says that part so quietly that he’s not even sure Shiro has heard him. He doesn’t even realize Adam has stopped the TV and great, now he feels awful for ruining the… atmosphere or whatever. It just can’t be a day if he doesn’t fuck up something. There’s a pregnant pause and he’s too afraid to look Shiro in the eyes. To see his caring, kind and loving gaze even when he doesn’t deserve it.

Shiro could’ve refused taking custody of him. He could’ve contacted and said ‘_No, I don’t want to take care of a relative I didn’t even know existed_’ or ‘_I’m not ready to take care of a kid yet_’. Shiro could’ve left him at Korea, not even bothering to see him and Keith wouldn’t have ever known, because he knows if he stayed there he wouldn’t even want to know gram about his blood family. He’d be too petty and angry with the world to even _think_ about it.

But because Shiro is Shiro and Adam is Adam, they decided to take him into their home, into their lives. They made him birthday parties, allowed him to have a dog, helped him with his homework, took him out on vacations and paid for his hover-bike. Things that he secretly dreamed about as he shared a bed with another kid at the orphanage.

A family. People that would love him and he’d love them back. Or at least only a mom. Or a dad. Little Keith didn’t care – he just wanted to belong somewhere.

And when that dream came true and he got what he wanted… he suddenly wants to get rid of it? Gods, Keith is really turning into a mess.

“Oh _Keith_…” he still doesn’t dare to look up and _oh so stubbornly_ keeps his gaze on the unfinished sketch he started drawing two days ago. 

What would he do without Lance? Without Hunk and Pidge, and Allura, and Romelle, and Matt? Without Shiro and Adam always ready to listen and give love whenever he doubted it or needed it desperately? Or without the Ramirez family – always the light, comforting presence in the back of his mind, the house radiating warmth and adoration that he so easily could reach for? Would he be even _Keith_ anymore without those people? Was he capable of cutting ties with them, just so he can protect his heart that already has cut and shared itself into the hands of those he loves?

He buries his head in his hands and inhales deeply. He hasn’t talked about these stuff with Shiro and it feels so weird _not_ to. Although if he’s honest he may have realized his crush on Lance a long time ago. Keith wouldn’t be surprised if even the whole fucking city knows except for Lance himself. But about him going to Naxzela which is in Alaska and so… so far away he hasn’t said it to anyone.

He can’t decide if he hasn’t, because he thinks he’ll actually get into Altea and some part of him hopes that he wouldn’t have to search for places in Alaska. But with all the months melting away so fast and creeping closer and closer – he even started checking out the campus and the apartments around the area. He’s submitted three pieces (_they have to submit five in total_) for now and they have an acceptance exam every month and Keith decided to take his in May, but the majority of his fellow art classmates did it in March and April already. In all twenty seniors only four have been accepted and he is so, _so_ scared he’ll fail that sometimes it feels like he can’t _breathe_. If he’s not fit for Altea then what’s the point?

Strong arms take his wrists in a grip and pull them away. He still doesn’t look at Shiro who he hasn’t heard him coming to his side. He still doesn’t even when he lovingly pulls his bangs up so he can plant a small kiss on his forehead. He lets his black bangs fall again, but his hand doesn’t leave his head and instead weaves slowly through his hair. He doesn’t look at his brother, but he sure as hell melts under his touch.

“I didn’t really mean it like that.”

Keith doesn’t answer.

“I mean… I would’ve done all these things and I get what you’re trying to say. I do, trust me. I have some experience on the whole ‘_I have to be depended again’ _part_._”

Keith doesn’t need any specification that he’s talking about his hand and the time after the catastrophe with Adam. It must’ve been hell. To wake up without an arm and your husband-to-be, the only alive person who is capable of giving you the love and affection you need most at that time, in a coma. Shiro probably felt so lonely and hopeless. Keith surely would’ve gone insane, not to mention the part that afterwards he couldn’t play basketball again. Another proof of how his brother is the strongest person he’s knows. Keith can’t imagine not doing one of the few things that make him truly happy.

“But you’re _not_ alone Keith. I know even after eight years you’d still have doubts and insecurities, but I am here. Still not giving up on you just like Adam hasn’t broken his promise either. And I’m sure that none of your friends would abandon you either. Because you’re Keith and _we love you_. I know you want to get into Altea, but your worth isn’t measured by you getting into that university. You’re so much more than that.”

Keith feels his eyes stinging and he doesn’t want to cry, he’s been doing that too much lately, but it seems like he can’t stop the two tears fall hot on his cheeks. He’s not sobbing or weeping hysterically – this is more of a quiet crying. He’s quick to wipe them off, while Shiro still caresses his head.

And he needed to hear that. He hasn’t realized how much actually he needed his ears to hear that. Ever since he decided to follow in Shiro’s footsteps and his dream as a professional artist, people have been telling him that he’ll get in, he’s talented, there’s no way he wouldn’t because he’s _Keith_ whatever that meant. He’s good at that, Altea would be idiots if they don’t accept him.

_“Dude you too?!” Lance surprisingly exclaims when Keith tells him his decision about Altea while they’re at the beach with their friends the summer before that. “That’s amazing, we’ll both still be together, because you’re definitely automatically accepted when they see just one drawing, I’m telling you, man-“_

No one, except for Shiro, told him that… it’s okay to not get in. It’s okay if he doesn’t study there. It’s okay – because there are other unis and at the end of the day Keith just wants to learn and improve.

Could it be that because everyone got in or wanted to get accepted was blinding his logical view on the things? The only exception in their group were Hunk and Romelle, but it didn’t count because the Balmera Uni was in the same city as Altea and Romelle was already accepted into an university in London.

So Keith nods and accepts gratefully the hug Shiro gives him. He rests his head on his brother’s muscular chest, his heart beating steadily and strongly next to his ear. Keith twists himself a bit so he can return the hug and circles his hands around Shiro’s waist.

“Woop wait are we having a family hug? Not fair, wait for me,” Adam whines and Keith lets out a tired laugh against Shiro who also gives a chuckle of his own. He hears Adam jogging and since Shiro is on his right, Adam settles on his left. He doesn’t bother to look at him, but is curios of how Adam would join in. He looks discreetly over his shoulder and laughs out loud this time when he squats and puts his head on Keith’s back and squeezes his torso.

“Aww Keith I love you so much, my talented baby who’s good at drawing and punching people,” Adam coos dramatically and honestly, Keith hasn’t stopped laughing.

“You sound like a soccer mom,” Shiro snorts.

“If God has decided that my fate would be the one of a soccer mom then so be it.”

They laugh, the three of them, together and this is all Keith has ever wanted. Every fight in school and in the orphanage, every tear, every time he’s packed his things deciding that he’s leaving forever, every breakdown – all of it was worth and he’d go through it again if it means that he’ll get this at the end.

He feels Shiro and Adam linking hands behind him. He smiles and wonders if they think the same.

**…**

It’s pretty late when Keith emerges from the bathroom after a long and hot shower, wet hair heavy on his face and a warm robe around his body, when the phone on his bed lights up with a notification that someone has texted him. Kosmo doesn’t seem bothered by the sudden noise, but opens his eyes and his tail starts wiggling. The black haired smiles and sits with his legs crossed on his bed and starts petting his dog while he grabs his phone.

His heart skips a sudden beat and it doesn’t stop when it realizes that it’s a text from Lance.

There’s only a ‘?’ written under Lance’s nickname which is ‘the most handsome amazing boiii’. No, Keith wasn’t the one who put it. When they finally became friends in freshman year Lance insisted they exchange numbers in case he wanted them to hang out. Keith did the mere mistake to give his phone to Lance and the consequences were obvious. Not that Keith doesn’t agree with the fact that Lance is the most handsome, amazing, coolest, selfless, funny guy, but it’d be embarrassing if Lance knew he did. Keith didn’t bother to change the name and here they are.

He unlocks his phone and a few messages greet him.

**the most handsome amazing boiii**

hey mullet

i was wonderin

if we could talk on the phone

?

Keith bites his lip and fumbles with his thumbs. Was Lance planning on telling him about the fight with Griffin? Was he going to be mad at him about dating James? Lance wasn’t that kind of person, but it seems like Lance is full of surprises when he decides to open the box that’s full of them. He sends a short ‘sure’ and breathes in.

Tries to calm his heart.

He briefly wonders for how long things have been like that. His palms sweaty, the flush on his cheeks, the warmness in his stomach whenever Lance showed even the bare minimum of affection towards him. The fastened heartbeat and the weakness in his limbs that always were on the verge of collapsing when the brunette hugged him. It got worse when they started messing around, because it seemed that with every second Keith was revealing too much of his cards on the table.

He was always scared that every time they kissed Lance would just figure it out, because of the way his hands skimmed over Lance’s body and tugged on his hair. Because the touches weren’t only lust – they were love, and respect, and desperation too. Poor Lance didn’t get anything and Keith doesn’t know if he’s thankful for that or angry, because some part of him just wanted this love out. He wanted everybody know sometimes, that he was in love, that he’d do anything for the boy with the hypnotizing blue eyes. To grab Lance by the shoulders and shake what he felt towards him into him.

His phone starts ringing and Lance’s picture of him asleep on the couch with Pidge drawing a dick on his forehead pops up. Keith breathes in two times before he finally presses on the green button to accept the call.

_“Hey mullet.”_

Keith melts over the fondness in his voice and presses his lips so he doesn’t smile like an idiot. Even when it’s 11 AM and no one is around.

“Hi yourself. What’s up?”

_“Except for the sky?” _

He literally can _see_ the smirk that’s on Lance’s face after that terrible outdated joke.

“What are you, a dad? Shiro is the one allowed to tell these.”

_“I have one younger sister, one nephew, one niece and three younger cousins. I think I’m pretty ready to be a dad, Keith.” _

“Are you telling me Allura is pregnant?” He teases and laughs a bit, but the words coming out have bitter taste afterwards. There’s no way Allura is pregnant – both, Lance and Allura, are too responsible for that. Especially when Lance has seen with his own eyes the struggles of having kids at an early age from Luis.

However an answer doesn’t come as fast as Keith as expected. There’s nothing on the other end, he doesn’t even hear Lance’s breathing. It’s like the line suddenly went dead. The black haired even checks to see if they’re still on the phone and when it confirms that indeed they’re still on the line his eyebrows furrow.

“Lance?” He calls out hesitantly and there’s finally sound. He hears some ruffling and heavy breaths and just when he’s about to ask what’s going on Lance answers.

_“We… uh… I mean, I broke up with her today. So yeah, there’s no…” _a sigh,_ “no babies for sure. We didn’t even do it so… no worries.”_

He sighs again and wow this days is full of shock and surprises, huh? _Lance_? Breaking up with _Allura_? The girl of his dreams? The same girl who he has chased for four years and finally started dating her? He broke up with _her_? _And_ punched his teammate in the same day? What is going on with Lance? Should he be worried?

“Oh… are you okay?” And Keith really wants to punch himself. What kind of stupid ass question is that? He groans silently and slaps one of his pillows repeatedly. WHY IS HE SO AWKWARD?

Surprisingly Lance huffs a tiny laugh. _“Yeah, actually. I mean, I’ve been planning to do it in a long time and I guess I finally got my shit together to do it.”_

_Planning in a long time? _Keith mouths to himself and looks helplessly at Kosmo as if his dogs holds all the answers in the universe.

“Can I ask why? It’s okay if you don’t wanna tell me.” He’s fast to backtrack in case Lance gets defensive and hangs up. No matter how sad the topic it is, it feels nice to talk before they both go to sleep as it used to be.

_“I’m just,”_ And there’s a heavy pause.

As if Lance needs more time to formulate the words he wants to say, to let them out in the best way possible. It’s a thing Lance does occasionally and it’s super endearing. Keith almost wants to be there to see the soft wrinkle between his eyebrows and the way his lips twitch from left to right. To let his finger caress the skin there and lean for a kiss-

Keith feels that his cheeks are burning and puts a hand over the left one in shame. Gods, he can’t even talk to Lance anymore without wanting to kiss the life out of him. No matter if said person wasn’t physically with him.

_“I’m in love and it’s not with her. I told her so and yeah… It feels wrong to want someone else while you’re in a relationship, you know? Actually I don’t know if you get me, but-“_

“I do.”

A pause.

“I do,” he repeats, “more than you know.”

Keith doesn’t find it in himself to be upset anymore. Lance is in love and he’s sure it’s not with him. Why would he anyways? It’s not like just because they made out from time to time and gave each other pleasure made Lance in love with him. And after all, as bad as it sounds, Keith was the guinea pig in all of this. Lance just wanted to feel how it is with a guy. And he got it. Keith was just stupid enough not to stop it that night before it got too messy and ugly.

Lance doesn’t ask after his answer, but the same can’t be said about him.

“Is it a boy? Or a girl?” He asks softly, careful where he steps and what buttons he presses. And tries to convince himself that the answer won’t matter, because it’ll hurt anyways.

A long pause once again.

And then, just as softly as Keith asked, Lance answers, _“Sometimes I forget you know about that.”_

“It’s not like I can exactly forget, Lance.”

The words get out of him too fast before he can stop them and he grimaces in distaste. He bites his knuckles as if some other bullshit will be spat out of him and patiently waits for Lance’s response.

At the end the Cuban boy only laughs emptily and mutters a quiet ‘yeah’.

The silence that follows isn’t awkward, but there’s a weird … thing lingering there. Like they’re both on the verge of saying something, but that could be his imagination. Or the ‘_I love you_’ Keith wants to say on his part. He’s not sure.

Keith falls back on his bed with the phone still clutched in his hand. The gentle sound with the warm air the air conditioner is letting out is really lulling and it has been a looong day and he’s tired, okay? Not to mention the lights above his bed are nicely shining next to his LD poster and yeah sleep sounds really good right now. The morning would be a disaster, because his wet hair hasn’t been brushed and it’ll be a bitch to untangle it from all the knots, but dammit he doesn’t think he can get up even if he tries.

“Why did you fight Griffin?” He asks and he shuts his eyes.

_“Shiro told you, huh?”_

“Of course he did.”

_“Well, he said some stuff about me. How I’m a shitty captain and that I can’t play. He even knew about my father, can you believe it?”_

Keith opens his eyes slowly and looks up at his white ceiling. He hasn’t mentioned to James about any of Lance’s family members so he’s not sure how his ex managed to get that information.

“You know it’s not me, right?”

_“Of course, I know,”_ Lance scoffs and Keith’s heart gets on fire because of the reminder of the amount of trust Lance has in him. Not that he’s surprised, but it’s good to know that even after that ghosting and ignoring they’re still best friends. Still Lance and Keith who trust and love each other no matter what.

_“And then,”_ he continues, _“he said something regarding you and Allura and I just… lost it.”_

Before Keith can even think how Allura was even brought into their topic of conversation, Lance cuts him off.

_“Please don’t ask me to tell you what it was. I don’t wanna lie. Especially to you.”_

Especially to you.

Keith’s whole body tingles with soft sparks and his gut explodes in butterflies at this. Maybe tonight he can pretend he’s special to Lance in the romantic way. Even if it’s not for much.

“Okay.”

_“Um, yeah so the reason I called you.”_ It seems like Lance is fumbling himself over his word and Keith can imagine the blush on his cheeks that always gets over to his ears. He closes his eyes and imagines the warm light brown, smooth skin beneath his pale fingers. The freckles plastered over them and his nose. The shape of his mouth and his jaw. He can paint a whole painting over his face, make a constellation with all the moles and freckles. He can let his fingers go up, and up all the way to his ears to his hair. The hair that is falls on his forehead and is so beautifully curvy that is a shame that Lance strengthens it most of the time. Then he’ll look into those beautiful eyes of his, the dark blue that so strongly resembles the Blue Hour that occurs after the sun sets. How badly he wants to draw those eyes. To kiss his expressive eyebrows and count his eyelashes that are not as long as his, but are thick and rest wonderfully on his cheeks.

He gets too far and he doesn’t realize he’s done it.

_“Keith! Are you sleeping?”_ He jumps a little and sits up, dazed and amazed at himself of how easily he backtracked into the heart warming fantasy that Lance is.

“Yes! I mean _no_! I’m just tired and closed my eyes for a second, sorry.” He clears his throat and rubs his left eye, reminding himself to stay wake up so he can hear what Lance wanted to call.

_“Oh, it’s alright. I just asked if you can pick me up for school tomorrow?”_

Oh… _that’s it?_

“Uh yeah sure, no problem.”

_“Yeah?”_

“Mhm,” he sleepily mumbles.

_“I’ll leave you to sleep now, then.”_

“Okay,” Keith says through an yawn.

_“Sweet dreams,”_ a sigh, _“I love you.”_

_Huh? _Keith perks up at that. Not that Lance hasn’t told him that he loves him before, but the tone-… Maybe he’s too sleep deprived, because that didn’t sound as platonic as it usually is. Or maybe it’s too late and Keith really needs sleep if he hears such things.

However, before he can even muster to finally return a response, the line goes dead.

“I love you too,” Keith mutters and doesn’t let go of his phone as he says those three empty words to the air in front of him.

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ .:*・°☆.。.:*

“God, why am I so stupid,” Lance mumbles and throws the phone on the bed next to him. He’s leaning on the wall, long legs outstretched in front of him, dangling. He looks at his windows where the big familiar walnut greets him back and sighs miserably for what it feels like a millionth time today. He thumps his head back, hitting the painted dark blue wall. It’s late and Lance should go to sleep, in fact he’s in his pajamas for two hours now ever since he finished dinner with his family. It was awkward, especially when Sylvio and Nadia kept asking him about his bruise and his sour mood. His mother was silent and so was Rachel and he assumed she’d told her what happened. Luis hovered for twenty minutes at most when he came back from the park and asked him million questions about the situation. Lisa kept it low-key, but he felt her worried glance every time while he was eating.

It sounds bad, but Lance is glad Marco isn’t here. Not that he doesn’t miss him, but it means that at least one family member isn’t losing his shit over his black eye and bandaged knuckles. Abuela Valentina like always, was too lost in her world to know what was going on. There were moments when he remembered her as the energetic, cocky woman he grew up with for the first thirteen years of his life and his heart bled that he might not talk to her again as he used to. Now she just forgets their names at times, sleeps all day and in general just … exists. It’s like her soul has already left her body and dark questions such as _“Would it be better if she just died so her suffering can end?”_ flooded his mind from time to time.

The night is dark with the shiny stars that blink back at him and he briefly wonders if Keith is also looking at them right now. But probably not, considering how sleepy and adorable he sounded on the phone.

For a moment he surprises himself when he thinks about it, but then he remembers. He’s _allowed_ to think like that now. He’s no longer bound to Allura and he won’t have to feel the invisible guilt choking him around the throat, now when this is finally over. The memory of her tear stained face hits him painfully again, but he’s happy she’s not leaving his life. He’s going to wait for as long as she wants, but Lance selfishly hopes Allura comes back around soon.

Lance suddenly feels too caged up and gets up so he can open the window. Cold air blows at his warm face and goosebumps rise on his skin, but he doesn’t care. He leans his forearms on the railing and ravishes in the freshness of the spring night. There is a slight breeze and it smells so much like the sea that he’s sure he can taste the salt on his tongue. He’s still thankful that his mother chose a city next to the beach. Nothing, of course, can’t compare to the turquoise waters, the white sand and the palm trees of Cuba, but it’s something. He’s even made a mission to himself to go on a summer vacation with all of his friends when they’re older. It’s a small, side dream of his, besides his main one – him becoming a professional basketball player. To share a piece of his childhood, a part of himself with his friends sounds like a nirvana.

He can even imagine it, as if it’s happening right in front of him.

Hunk would be fascinated with the native food and the surf and Pidge would complain about the sun and how she sunburns so easily while she’s under the umbrella. She’d grumble behind another book, but Lance knows she’ll love any minute of it. Allura would too try surfing and swim like she’s been swimming in the Cuban water all her life. She and Romelle would play volleyball and encourage each other about approaching other attractive people they see, drink cocktails and sun bathe.

Shiro and Adam would be too busy acting all lovey-dovey like the disgusting married couple they are. He and Adam would probably joke around and translate wrong just for the funs of it. He can already _hear_ Shiro’s mind plotting how to get it back with his too hot metal arm. Once Adam told him that Shiro “accidentally” slapped him on the back which led to him having a red handprint for three days. Which is bullshit since according to Keith, Shiro definitely has a cooling off mode.

And thinking of Keith, Lance is sure he’d be a mix of all of them. He’d surf and swim, play volleyball because he’s perfect at everything and the brunette hates him and loves him for it. He’d drink cocktails with alcohol in them just to spite Shiro, but also whine about his skin just like Pidge. Instead of a book, Lance knows that he’d just start drawing whatever he likes and comes to his mind. And since they’re _Keith and Lance_ they would fight in the water, place bets and bicker like some first graders. Lance wonders if Keith would ask him to put sunscreen on his back, like he did last year and the Cuban boy had to get his gay shit together in the span of five seconds just to simply _answer_.

Lance can already feel the sourness in his mouth at the thought of how so many people would check oblivious Keith out and he’d be too useless to do anything about, because he’s a _fucking coward_. He’s accepted he was bisexual even before he confirmed it with Keith’s kiss, but he hasn’t been in terms that he’s catastrophically in love with Keith and it’s a feeling he hasn’t experienced before. Sure, he’s young and has plenty of time to search for other people. But the thing is, _Lance simply doesn’t want to_.

Keith with his ridiculous, luscious mullet, long dark lashes, full lips, high cheekbones and… damn _those eyes_. Those bewitching eyes of his – the door to his soul and entire being. Lance’s heart just _bursts_ when he goes as such as _thinking _about them. And if you ask about their color, Lance has long gave up on figuring out what exact color are they. He remembers when freshman Lance asked Keith about them and the idiot simply shrugged and said, _“grey.”_

But no. They’re not just _grey_. They’re some kind of dark gray that goes to black, that sometimes travels to inky blue and when the sunlight hits just _right_, some witchcraft gets involved because they turn _purple_. Who the fuck has such eyes except for Allura? Lance sometimes wishes he could see how Keith’s parents looked like, just so he can witness the devastating beauty they both apparently owned.

And maybe talk to them and thank them for not using a condom.

Before he can dive deeper into thoughts about Keith and his eyes, someone behind him opens the door and he startles.

“Leandro, que haces? Hace frío como el hielo aquí,” his mother scowls at him and thrusts her head angrily, “cerrar la ventana.” (Leandro, what are you doing? It’s cold as ice here. Close the window.)

Lance notices the two mugs she’s holding and the steam coming up from them. She is also in her pajamas which is a big black shirt and old red sweatpants, her hair up in a neat bun. Without meaning to his eyes lower and the gold wedding ring shines under the lightning of his room. Lance has never dared to ask why she didn’t get rid of it when they learned Mateo died, mostly because he lies himself that he doesn’t want to know. His father is still enveloped in a mysterious smoke and so is the relationship he and his mother had. When he was twelve he wanted to know more about it, curious why the topic of him was so taboo, but Luis stopped him just in time and shook his head almost in a _“You’re too young to understand”_ manner. He still doesn’t know what it truly meant.

“Lo haré, no te preocupes.” He turns around towards the open air again and mutters, “solo déjame respirar un poco.” (I’ll do it, don’t worry. Just let me breathe for a little.)

He hears his mother closing the door and soon she’s standing on his right side and the same eyes as his are also surveying the night in front of them.

She wordlessly passes him his own mug that’s orange with Shiro’s jersey number that’s 16, **SHIROGANE** written on top of it . He still gets kind of shy when he remembers what a pathetic fanboy he used to be for him back then. He’s not sure from where that basketball mania started from, but Shiro for sure had a finger in his dream to become a player. At first it was only a pastime, playing with the other kids in school or with his friends on the weekends. Most preferred football, which he also likes, but _oh_ basketball riled him up in a way football never did.

Luis used to take him, Marco and Rachel late at night on the playground. His mother was always worried sick, but if she let them she must have had a huge trust in his oldest brother. When Luis started dating Lisa, Lance missed the nights dearly, especially after she got pregnant.

He and Marco, however, couldn’t let go of the basketball so easily. Lance quickly started watching matches with Marco and Rachel, but soon it was only him. He used to be _obsessed_. Lance quickly became a fan of the White lions and till this day he curses he wasn’t born earlier to actually witness the legend Shiro was. Sadly, Shiro had to retire long before Lance was born, but that didn’t stop him from finding old matches on his mother’s laptop and watching them every day, until there weren’t left anymore for him to see.

Watching Shiro play was… mesmerizing. _Hypnotizing_. He couldn’t take his eyes off him, his smiles whenever he scored, his frowns when he didn’t. But even if the Lions lost he was still shining with that kind, handsome smile of his. However, six years after that catastrophe, it seemed no one has forgotten him. He was still mentioned on every match, there were articles and updates on his life, pictures and interviews. One time, he was invited on a game as a guest and he screamed so loud his mother had burst into the living room, broom in her hand ready to beat up someone.

He’ll also never forget, when he watched on the sport news, the pretty Cuban woman saying in Spanish, “Four years ago, on this day, the wedding that got the whole world hooked and excited happened! Takashi Shirogane and Adam Williams shared some bonus pictures from their most important day! Take a look!”

The shock that overtook him, the _surprise_ at the fact that Takashi was married and he didn’t _know_. He even felt a bit disappointed and now Lance understands it might have been the childish want in him to marry his celebrity crush. Which that’s what it was. _A crush_. He should’ve realized he was bisexual a long time ago. It would’ve saved him from a lot of headaches.

“Where’s your head, Leandro?” His mother softly asks and reaches up to caress him on the cheek with her knuckles. Lance melts under her warm, motherly touch and tries to compose himself, no matter how much he wants to crumble himself into her arms and cry for eternity.

“I’m having flashbacks from when I used to cry over Shiro,” he laughs quietly, careful not to break the pretty bubble that has enveloped them. He takes a sip from his tea, that’s now in the perfect temperature for drinking. It’s hot, but not unbearable and its warmth calms him down to an extent. His shoulders drop and it seems he hasn’t realized how uptight he has been the whole time.

“Ah, yes. I still remember how sad you were after you found out Shiro was married,” she chuckles, her eyes not leaving his face, “you moped around for days.”

She slowly runs his fingers through his hair, while Lance tenses. His heart increases its beat, panic surging through him. He still doesn’t get why he can’t just tell her. His mother is one of the best people ever and she raised him to not judge anyone. She obviously doesn’t have any problems with Shiro and Adam, Keith and Allura so why can’t he do it? What is he so afraid of? How many times he was on the verge of just telling her, when it all became too much for him to handle? Why is this a part of himself that he’s so stubborn on not sharing?

“I-I mean,” he stutters, shakily, “I was just surprised that’s all. I claimed myself to be his biggest fan and yet…”

His mother only hums, but it doesn’t sound content. It sounds suspicious, like she’s not believing. That makes him turn his head to look at her. There’s a tiny smile on her lips and her eyes are twinkling with mischief. As if she knows something he doesn’t.

“What?” Lance asks and narrows his eyes at her slightly.

She pats him on the cheek twice and lets go so she can hold her mug.

“Nothing, mijo,” she says after she stops drinking from her own tea, “I’m just wondering when you’ll stop lying to yourself.”

Her eyes go from mischief to sadness, but even then doesn’t stop smiling. Lance’s heart hasn’t stopped beating fast, but now it’s like it’s gonna burst out of his body. His tongue is heavy in his mouth and when his cup starts slipping, because of his sweaty palms he starts considering throwing himself from the window. He tries to sound neutral when he answers.

“There is nothing to lie about. I’m literally the most assured person.”

The lie leaves a sour taste the moment it comes out and he once again turns to gaze at the tree in their backyard. He’s had some plans on building a wooden house for Sylvio and Nadia, but every time he remembers that he _can’t_. He’s going away after the summer. To pursue his dream, to become something he’s longed for so long to the point there’s nothing else he wants to do in his life. The basketball is his passion, the something in his life that he’s the best at, the thing that makes him happy and hopeful just by thinking about it. It had its hard moments, times where he cried, thinking he’s not good enough and he’ll never be. Moments where he couldn’t bare the stress, with all the exams and the expectations that come after he’s decided to be a professional.

It was especially hard after him discovering he’s not actually straight was added into the pile. His whole life he knew what he wanted and no matter how hard it was he fought teeth and nail to get it. To suddenly be hit with the fact that there are still some pieces and parts that he himself doesn’t know about was scary. Not to mention that the fact he is madly in love with Keith and felt such feelings about him that he’s never felt before which was not scary. It was terrifying.

Would he leave his mother without telling her?

The silence stretches out, but not for long.

“That’s true,” his mom answers, “but it’s not at the same time.”

“What does that even mean, mom?” He scoffs tiredly. He drinks more tea and after he’s finished he puts the mug on the desk that’s next to his window. The sound is strangely loud in the silent room, with the only exception that is the wind still blowing through.

“How is Allura?” Instead of giving an answer his mother brings his girlfriend- _ex girlfriend_ into the topic all of a sudden and her question is nothing, but curious. When Lance started dating her and brought Allura into his home, his mother was enthusiastic, joking around, but behind that mask Lance could see through. There was a hint of worry, of sadness behind that curtain, but Lance never asked about it. Maybe he was too busy pretending he still liked Allura and wasn’t hopelessly in love with Keith to bother himself. Or maybe she was worried that Allura would be the one breaking his heart. How the tables have turned.

“She’s not going to be okay for a while I think, but she’ll pull through.”

He wills himself to keep looking outside, but when he side-eyes his mother he sees her eyebrows furrow.

“What?” She looks at him, her body turning around to fully face him. Lance sighs and turns to her too, leaning his forearm on the railing. “What do you mean?”

Her eyes are hurt, empathy basically written on her face. His mother always felt the other’s pain, always reaching out a helping hand not caring if she’d receive something back, always giving her whole heart to those whom she loves. At some dark point he used to think that this was foolish, but just now he realizes how much of that has passed onto him.

“I broke up with her, mom. Today. When I was at Oriande.”

In contradiction of his nervousness with telling that to Keith to how calm he sounds now, Lance doesn’t know why it’s easier to reveal that in front of his mother. (Or maybe he does, but there’s no harm in lying to himself a little bit more, right?) Her eyes remain transfixed on him, but he sees some wonder cracking through. Her fingers fiddle with the rim of the now empty mug and her ring shines once again, the pastel blue diamond in the middle of it shining back at him.

“What happened? Mijo, I thought you were happy with her? Did she do something to upset you? Or did _you_?” He can see the way that she doesn’t want to believe that he did something morally wrong. Something that she raised him _not_ to do and he hopes that what he tells her next will calm her down. Lance can’t even swallow the thought that his mother might be disappointed or miserable because of him or his actions.

“Mom is it,” he looks down to his hands that are slightly shaking and he grabs them both. He wants to rub his right palm with the thumb of his left hand, but the bandage that nurse Grace so carefully put stops him. Instead he starts fiddling with the end of it that’s near his wrist. He swallows, dry and hard, an invisible thing stopping him from breathing in properly. Who knows, it may be his heart that’s in his throat.

“Mom is it wrong to love someone else while you’re in a relationship with a different person?” He finally finishes his question. He can’t even bare to look at his mother, afraid of what he might find on her face that’s so similar to his. Has she ever felt something like that? The conflicting in her heart and the strings pulling it in every direction as she tries to decide what’s the best decision, the best outcome for her?

“Because,” he doesn’t let her say anything, “I was already, _I still am_, in love with said person, but I thought I would get over it.”

He lets go of his hands and cards them through his locks. He does it angrily and it hurts, so different from when his mom was touching him full of love and affection moments ago. “I’ve liked Allura for basically my whole high school life and all of a sudden I realize she’s not actually what I _want_? I mean what kind of bullshit is that? And the worst part is that everyone is hurting! I hurt myself, I already hurt Allura and who knows – I may be unconsciously hurting the person I’m in love with! Because I’m a dumbass and I can’t decide what I want! And- and-“ he stumbles over his words, “I even felt _relieved_ when I did it, because I’m an awful person! Like ‘_Oh yeah I broke up with the most amazing girl, now I’m allowed to actually think about that person_’ without feeling like a complete trash! Don’t even get me started on the fact that I can’t even tell my own _fucking_ mother that I’m a goddamn _bisexual_-“

He stops himself just in time, mouth closing up faster than the lightning. Panic surges through his veins and he is quick to cover his eyes with the help of his long fingers that Keith has mocked fondly millions of times. _Freakishly long limbs_, he’d mutter under his nose. He stops himself from bashing his head in the wall next to the window, because even at such times his brain can’t seem to stop thinking about _Keith_. He feels frustrated tears rushing out of his eyes, but Lance doesn’t care enough to stop them. He crumbles down on the ground and he presses his knees into his chest, palms digging into his forehead, afraid of touching his black eye. He lets the sob leave his body like it’s some bad energy flooding away; as if the black magic casted upon him is washing away. He knows it must be an ugly view for his mother, but he still doesn’t stop crying.

Lance soon registers a cool hand settling around his shoulders. There’s his mother’s palm on his forehead, pushing the chestnut locks away from his face as her other hand takes his own arms away from his eyes and cleans the tears carefully and tenderly. He leans towards her, his face finding a place on her neck and she lets him cry. _And oh boy_, does he cry. The walls are closing up around him leaving him breathless. It wrecks his whole body, his heart bleeding, cracking as it leaves all of its pieces on the ground around them.

But strange as it is, with his mother here, supporting, still loving unconditionally like she did a few seconds and years ago from the moment he was born, it’s like she picks up all of the broken parts and puts them together easily like it’s a puzzle she has done a thousand times. He briefly wonders what his father would have thought of him. Would he be proud of the person he has become? Would he be proud of his wife and his other children? If he was alive, didn’t ruin a big proportion of their lives and stayed with them like was supposed to, would he be standing here on his other side hugging him tightly like his mother is doing right now? Was his mom going to be happier with her husband on her side? He’ll forever wonder though, because his father is six feet under and Lance didn’t even get the chance to know him for who he is.

He continues to cry and it hurts. It hurts like there someone is cutting into his chest, carving out his heart so it can be taken out and stomped on over and over again. His mother keeps holding him in her short, but steady strong arms under his window as she witnesses her son breaking down in the night where no one can see him, but her.

But it ends.

Soon there are no tears left to cry or maybe he’s tired of them. His head aches a bit, but it’s not so bad. His eyes are definitely red, with some snot running down from his nose and yet that doesn’t stop his mother from kissing his forehead and the crown of his head. She hugs him around the neck fully with both of her arms. She starts humming some old Spanish lullaby she used to sing to him and Rachel before going to bed. Lance thumps his head softly next to hers, still not opening his eyes. After a while she breaks the silence.

“Go to bed and wait for me, okay? I’m gonna bring you some water.”

Déjà vu makes his heard spin and when he feels her getting up, obviously not waiting for him to answer. He remembers that those are close-but-not-really words she used to tell him when he was a kid sick, throwing up like there’s no tomorrow or when he had a bad nightmare. The past years he doesn’t crawl up into her bedroom anymore when he has one since he’s old enough to deal with them on his own, but he can still think that nothing can’t compare to his mother’s embrace.

With great effort he opens his eyes, but winces when the lamp on the ceiling painfully makes his head throb more. He remembers that he even got punched today so that’s also saying something. What a rollercoaster of a day, huh? It’s not like so much shit happens in the span of twenty four hours to him all the time. He gets up groggily and closes the window, since now the room is ice cold and it feels as if the polar bears live here. He grabs one of his hoodies that are thrown over the handback of his chair in front of his desk and puts it on. It’s not exactly warm, but it’s better than him being in just a shirt. He heads towards the bathroom he shares with Rachel and washes his face as thoroughly as he can with just one hand since he tries not to wet his bandages. He brushes his teeth and considers doing his skin care routine which without it he’ll probably look the embodiment of nightmare tomorrow, but he doesn’t care and he’s way too damn tired. So Lance simply dries himself in the blue towel that’s next to Rachel’s green one.

When he exits, his mother is already back in his room. She’s holding a cup of water, blister pack and a small thing in her other hand. She catches his gaze, smiles and motions at his bed with what he assumes means ‘sit’. He obeys her unsaid order and reaches a hand towards the cup of water. She sits next to him, on his right and hands the blister pack first. She gives him a pointed look, when he makes a face, but pops one into his hand anyways knowing damn well that this is a battle he’s not winning not now, nor ever. It’s an aspirin judging by its shape and awful taste, but Lance swallows it with the cold water’s help like the big man he is. She takes the cup and the pills and puts them on his desk while Lance gets under the covers, settling comfortably in his bed. Whatever his mother throws at him now he’ll be able to handle if he’s in his own bed.

Surprisingly (_or maybe not_), she makes a motion with her hand, willing him to move further to the wall so he has to make space for his mother. She lays down next to him, but not exactly, because she leans to supports her head with her hand, elbow propped, gazing down at him. He doesn’t know, but he escapes her eyes and intensely gives his whole attention to a dirty stain on the wall that he hasn’t noticed before. She clears her throat pointedly and he knows she smiles smugly when he lets out a heavy sigh in defeat.

“By how unsurprised you are, I assume you knew,” he mutters dryly and tiredly exhales.

His mother huffs a tiny laugh, obviously humored by his sarcastic tone. He dares to look at her and she looks amused, her eyes glinting. “Of course I did, amor. You’re my baby. I’ve had you and Rachel in my stomach for nine months, raised you, fed you and cleaned you and you think I wouldn’t notice my son liking boys?”

She rolls his eyes and jabs him playfully in the ribs. Lance squirms under her, feeling a smile stretching on his lips as he feels once again as a kid, uncaring and free with no particular problems other than him missing a Lions match.

“When you say it like that, it sounds so simple, but… I guess I was just-“

He doesn’t get to finish before she cuts in. “Scared?”

Lance nods in affirmation and he inspects how her face suddenly goes from lighthearted only to be replaced with a sad one as if she reminisces about something distant. She starts scratching the area around her wedding ring with her thumb and Lance speculates to himself if she thinks about him. If she gets nostalgic from time to time, if she also thinks like him of what could’ve been different if the circumstances weren’t the same. Or maybe she’s never stopped. Maybe Mateo Ramirez was her Keith. That one person you’re not getting over, no matter what.

She shakes her head and a short lock of her hair falls on her face. He used to be so jealous of her hair when he was starting high school. She let him braid it often when he asked, but it was particularly hard when it was so long, curly and huge. She cut down a lot when they first arrived into the States, but now its length reaches her waist just as it did from their times in Cuba. The only ones who resemble the nice thickness are Rachel and Marco. Lance has the suspicion that he, Luis and Veronica are brunettes thanks to their father. The thing is – he hasn’t seen a picture of him in so long so if he’s honest to himself he barely remembers any features.

“It’s okay to be scared. This is something personal and it’s your only right to decide if you’re gonna show it to the world or not,” she says and smiles down at him.

The silence settles between them again, but now instead of tense or heartbreaking, it’s comfortable and warm. Lance feels so content with her presence here, her unconditional love that he feels is radiating in waves attacking him or it’s a wave crashing over his whole body. He’s so grateful she is there with him, helping him up when he needs a hand to get up. Yes, he has amazing, wonderful friends that with no doubt would support him and love him still, but it’s so different when you know that the most constant person in your life doesn’t care and is still is there.

He feels his eyelashes fluttering and falling closed. He finds himself closing his eyes, exhaustion making him feel heavier and heavier with every take of breath. He listens with one ear the way his breathing syncs perfectly his mother’s and that lulls him so nicely that he’s sure within two minutes he’ll be asleep like the dead. His fingers unconsciously flex against the hold he has on the blanket and he feels so calm, so so calm …

“It’s Keith, isn’t it?” His mother whispers the question, but it’s not hesitant, nor curious. She knows the answer to this question, knows that whatever Lance says it’s not going to matter, because she knows the truth.

Lance’s first instinct is to lie, to deny. To stand up and stumble over his words, his flushed face giving him away, but still trying to push this accusation into another direction on a safe distance away from him. To politely kick his mom out and when she gets out for him to try to calm his heart. Keyword – _try_. Because he knows that when he tries nothing gets to nowhere and his thoughts will always lead to Keith. His smile, his eyes, his scowl, his confused expression and the fondness when he talks about the things he loves, the way he cares so deeply about those close to him and will never let them go and the way he so fiercely protects his heart from all the bad in the world, because behind all the bravery and standoffish façade, a boy who’s scared of being left alone still stays there.

But… the questions is, what’s the point? Why does he run so much from these feelings? Why is he so insisting on stomping on them and putting them at arm length? Is it so bad to just … let it be?

So even though his heart is thrashing inside so fast and heavy inside his chest like a sledgehammer – Lance _nods_.

Because yes, _it’s Keith_. It’s always gonna be.

His mom’s reaction isn’t late in any way and Lance carefully opens his eyes to see.

And he’s a bit shocked by what he sees. She’s smiling wide with her teeth visible, worry lines on the edge of her eyes that are filled with mirth, love and… _excitement_? Lance is confused on why that’s her reaction, but doesn’t question it nor tries to understand what it means. He lets it go and smiles back at her hesitantly. She visibly swallows.

“Keith is a wonderful boy, mi amor, I hope everything turns out alright for you both at the end,” she says and her minty breath hits his face along with her hand that grazes his cheek again. Before he can muster out an answer, out of nowhere she reaches down to her sweatpants and pulls out something from her pocket. It’s apparently too small since she’s fisted her hand around it and Lance sees nothing.

He doesn’t wait too long to see it, but his mom definitely takes her time to open her hand and show it to him. She scratches her forehead, looks up to the ceiling as if she’s reminding herself something important, but long at last gazes down at Lance and grins softly. She loosens her fist and brings her palm up and there in her small hand lies a tiny blue flash drive. It sparkles a bit under the room light and on it there’s a small paper that has been stuck on it with transparent tape. On it there are the numbers ‘070926’ written and a tiny heart is drawn next to them. It’s perhaps a date, a password or some sort of code, but for the love of it Lance doesn’t have any idea what this is as he sees this for the first time in his life.

He sends his mother a quizzical look and she huffs a laugh. “This is… there something that I’ve never let any of you watch. But I feel like it’s time for you to do it and I think it’s going to answer a lot of questions you’ve never gotten the answer to.”

He nods a bit distracted and takes the tiny subject from her hands. He’s no stranger to mystery objects in his family – once he and Marco dropped a box full of his abuela’s stuff from her past that she forbid anyone to touch and they broke her precious Backstreet Boys CD. Lance feared for his life back then and maybe the literal Hell was friendlier than the glare and the angry Spanish rant she unleashed upon him and his older brother. Nevertheless he bought a new one for her birthday with Luis’s help (and money) and he and Marco learned ‘I want it that way’ so they can serenade it to her. To this day she used to claim it was her favorite birthday.

But this? Some flash drive that holds a video or pictures that somehow his mother decided it shouldn’t be shown to the world? Now that seemed so much important and valuable than a Backstreet Boys album. He inspects it a little from side to side, but other than the numbers there’s nothing else on it. Lance hums and feels a tinge of excitement. It feels like his mother is passing down some family relic or a secret that only he and she would know about. It makes him feel special and his heart bursts with love when he looks at her and feels the bond between them strengthening even more than before.

“Thanks, mom,” he gulps and once again nervously glances at his hands fiddling with the flash drive.

“You’re welcome, amor. However you should go to sleep. It’s getting pretty late and we’re meeting with the principle tomorrow – we definitely need energy for that.”

She kisses his forehead tenderly and takes the flash drive from his hands so she can put it on his desk. His mom grunts as she gets up from his bed and Lance rolls down, marveling at how much warmth she left behind her.

“We’re not watching it together?” Lance asks curiously and watches how she yawns tiredly, but laughs midway when she hears his question.

“Hmm,” she throws him a sly glance and tilts her head on the side while walking backwards towards his door, “try watching it with Keith, I have the feeling you’ll both like it. And get a WLT Keith is gonna need it!”

WLT – short for World Languages Translator. It’s a device that you can use as an earpiece when you go to a different country where they don’t speak your language so you can communicate better. Most international hotels and tourist guides have them and in some countries it’s even mandatory. It’s also a device that you can plug in into any TV or console and when it does a check on all the files, shows or movies it automatically makes subtitles so you can watch anything if it’s not in a language you don’t know or understand. It takes around twenty minutes to load, but it’s so comfortable and almost everyone has one of these bad boys now. WLT was created non surprisingly by Altea senior students in partnership with students from Balmera and other universities around the globe that also specify in technologies. His mom has told him that at first those were super expensive and not everyone could’ve afforded them, but with time when it was finally patented everyone got one.

They have one too, but they haven’t used it in so long so it’s gonna be a bitch to find it. Lance hopes Keith has one at his home otherwise they’d have to buy a new one. For a second Lance panics if it’s a romantic movie or something of the sort and this is a way for his mother to set him up with his crush, but then he remembers the numbers on it and how his mother said no one has ever seen whatever it’s in inside so it must not be what Lance think it is. But if Keith is going to be the only one who needs it then Lance is sure the thing they’re going to watch is surely going to be in Spanish. Which wakes another million questions inside his head, but he’s so tired and exhausted after this day that he feels it all going away when his mother turns off the lights.

“Night mom,” he mumbles sleepily and watches with blearily eyes the way she smiles in the dark.

“Dulces sueños, mi amor,” she whispers loud enough for him to hear and kindly closes the door. (Sweet dreams, my love.)

And maybe after this day, full of so many emotions, rollercoaster loaded with so much heartbreak, love, anger, pain and tears Lance thought he would’ve stayed awake for another one or two hours, maybe even the whole night, mind still working, gears still turning not leaving him in peace and quiet.

But strangely, soon after Lance closes his eyes, behind his lids he does not see darkness, but the light of the summer sun, air smelling of salt and the sound of waves crashing and the feeling of sand beneath his feet. He sees Keith there, laughing beautifully with all his might, black hair blown away by the breeze and outstretched hand inviting him into the blue water.

Lance smiles in his sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i feel like i should be really guilty for the way i'm making this such a slow burn and i really hope the final meets ur expectations, becuse if not i'll legit throw myself off a cliff. ANYWAYS a few notes, before u go read something else: 
> 
> \- idk why i suddenly invested myself into lance's family and esp his mom, but ah i just like the way i wrote her character yk and the mystery about his dad. some authors kinda make her this nameless food making cute mother, which most of the time i dont mind rlly, but before i started this fic i knew lance's mom was gonna be a huge figure in his development. so i really hope u enjoy her the way i created her!
> 
> \- 2nd, i once again say sorry for stretching this out, but my goal is that when i post my final to also post the 1st chapter of my new fic and that will definitely take so much time of my part so a part of me decided it's right to feed u my sweet kids with something before i leave u hungry for god knows how long...
> 
> \- 3rd I AM SO CURIOUS about what do you all think Luna gave to Lance (what it's in the flash drive) so dont be shy and if u want to hit me w some sweet theories !! everything is appreciated here which leads to me thanking u all for all the hits, kudos and comments it all means so much to me <333
> 
> \- and 4th i am again making a "poll" about what my next fic is going to be. so here are the the most wanted ones from the last time and vote in the comments about which one ur all more interested at : 
> 
> *1. A Canon Divergence fic where it's forbidden for paladins to fall in love due to space maddness. Keith has just found he's Galra and on top of that he might have a little crush on a certain Blue Paladin. Which turns out to be forbidden and it has the power to drive him insane. But that's okay, as long as Lance doesn't love him back then everything should be okay according to Allura. But it gets harder and harder each passing day when instead of pettiness and anger he starts finding trust and respect in blue eyes. Will Keith and Lance keep unscathed after all this or will their love destroy them literally?
> 
> *2. A Fantasy/Modern AU with Keith as a vampire and Lance as a werewolf. 
> 
> Keith is from one of the high class clans in the city of Altea where all mythical creatures live in peace away from the human eyes. However, lately when strange murders start happeing and all leads to the Galra clan, despite Keith's family warning him not to intervene Keith feels obligated to save the reputation of all the good vampires and make everyone believe that not every vampire is bad as everyone has started to believe. While also trying to find out who exactly is responsible for the killings and what's their motive, in the midst of all the chaos Keith stumbles across Team Voltron and a certain werewolf has made it his personal mission to annoy him. 
> 
> Oh yeah... did Keith mention they're partners?


	6. my wildflower

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “A tragedy, but I still think you’ll bring some boys to the yard with these,” Lance claims and grins at the way Keith snorts cutely against his fist. 
> 
> That’s such a bad habit in Lance’s opinion. Keith always hides the beautiful gems called smiles behind a hand whenever he can and the small dimple on his cheek, preventing Lance from witnessing the lovely way his face changes when a true, genuine bright look blooms on his face like the first snowdrop, announcing the spring after a long winter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you all : *booing and throwing trash at me bc im trash for not posting the final chapter like i promised to*
> 
> me : IM SORRY I JUST WANNA BE A GOOD AUTHOR
> 
> no but fr, i am so so sorry for fooling u all bbies again. i know i said i'll post the finale along with the new chapter of my fic but man, i just feel so guilty for not posting for a whole month and when i have this 22k monster in my arms - i JUST HAD TO , OKAY? i promise absolutely 100% that im posting everything the next time, trust me on that for the last time. 
> 
> for now, have this chapter that was full with all of my fav scenes to write and please dont be angry!! i love u all!

Present Time – April 2055

“Unacceptable! _Absolutely_ unacceptable!”

Lance exhales heavily through his nose and leans his elbow on his chair, taking all the anger the principal – Mrs. Ryner – is currently throwing at him and James Griffin.

He regrets not taking a cup of a coffee before they went on their way to here. His mother insisted he’ll need it, if he doesn’t want to fall asleep during the meeting with Ryner, but he was busy trying _not_ to be late for when Keith stopped in front of their house with his hover-bike. His mom insisted on driving them both, but Lance saw through all the bullshit and the way she hid her sly grin behind her mug. Maybe telling her he’s bisexual _and _that he’s in love with Keith wasn’t such a great idea.

“Were you two out of your mind?! You’re both honorable students and the pride of the school! And now you’re here embarrassing yourselves, because you acted so childishly!” Ryner crosses her arms and arches a brow at them, frustrated eyes jumping left to right; from him to James.

She’s dressed in a white shirt, tucked in black trousers and her heels make an annoying sound on the wooden floor, every time she walks around in her cabinet. Her hair is in a neat bun and there’s a badge with her name, hanging around her neck, swinging whenever she makes sudden, drastic moves, which Lance isn’t going to lie, make him flinch every time.

His mother next to him is the perfect example of a student who shouldn’t be slumping in his chair, half asleep while the most important authority in the school gives him a run for his money. She looks fresh as a cucumber and Lance wonders how she manages to do it every morning. She’s in white jeans, navy blue shirt with its sleeves rolled up to her elbows and her favorite black coat lies in her lap with her hands holding it there too. Her back is strengthened, legs crossed at the ankles, in full contradiction with her son, who feels like he’ll die any minute.

“I deeply apologize for my son’s behavior Mrs. Ryner, I assure you that he’s already experiencing the consequences of his actions. But the heavier detention, in my opinion, should fall on the other boy since _he_ was the one who attacked my son _first_,” James’s mother, which by the way is the _fucking mayor_ Amelia Andrews, calls out and Lance kind of forgot she’s there.

She’s been silent ever since she arrived with her son by her side, radiating so much confidence and self-assurance as if she was born with it and ready to be in a high position all her life. She’s a good mayor, doing a lot of projects and improvements to this city and Lance gets why people vote for her. Her comment doesn’t bother him since all she said was true, although she one hundred percent doesn’t know the full story and the reason he attacked. Lance can’t really blame her for defending her kid, after all, he’d do the same. He doesn’t get how such an asshole has her DNA though.

“My son is going through some… _personal_ issues regarding his love life and that has affected him too much, I must admit.”

James goes rigid next to her, but keeps glaring at his shoes, brooding just like Keith used to do a lot two years ago and Lance almost laughs at the picture, the irony of it. He can’t help but think Amelia said something too embarrassing to share in front of so many people and judging by the way Shiro’s eyebrows go up unimpressed, he must be thinking the same right now.

Ryner nods, but Lance already saw the confusion and how her eyes skimmed over to Shiro, who is still as a Queen’s Guard and does not respond to her, which Lance knows, is his own sort of rebellion against James and quiet protectiveness of Keith. Usually Shiro would be neutral and see both sides of the situation before giving an opinion, but it’s more than obvious that James and Amelia are alone in this battle.

“Well,” Ryner’s brown hard gaze falls on him and his mother, “what do you have in defense, young man?”

Lance furrows his brows and makes a move to stand up in his chair so he can give an answer, but his mother gets ahead of him.

“With all due respect ma’am, I know my son and in all the eighteen years of his life he has not _once_ attacked physically another person. I’m led to believe he was strongly provoked by James. By no other means I am excusing his behavior, but perhaps the detention you’re talking about should be equal.”

Not once she stutters, flinches or messes up and Lance feels pride spreading through all of him. She’s straight forward, blunt and is here not to take any shits even from the mayor. _Hell yeah_, this is his mother Luna Carillo and she’s not here to stand your bullshit.

Lance represses the urge to grin at James’s sulking face and stick out his tongue just like the little kids he’s always looking after. Shiro coughs into his fist, but not before Lance catches a tiny smile. All of a sudden Lance is one hundred percent awake, ready to watch all of this drama unfold, even when this is super important business where his actual future might be decided here. His right leg starts twitching so Lance put his ankle it on his left knee, trying to look casual and free spirited.

“Miss…?”

“Carillo.”

“Yes, Miss Carillo, I am not making any assumptions about your son’s character, but the facts are here and your son threw the first punch. Perhaps you can teach him violence is not the answer, especially to verbal attacks as such as you’re accusing my son of making without any proof,” Amelia says and Lance can feel the satisfaction of how she worded everything. Someone once had told him James’s father was a lawyer, living in another city making money of really serious and important cases. Maybe his divorced wife had picked up something from him.

His mother doesn’t miss a beat.

“And _perhaps_ you should teach your son how to take ‘no’ for an answer, instead of bothering said person who causes those “issues regarding his love life”.”

Lance almost yells as if this is a rap battle and his mom just dropped the sickest bar he’s ever heard in his life. He’s brought some insight on the situation to his mom in the morning so she can decide if the punch was reasonable and while she didn’t say anything to Lance, her actions now speak louder than the silence. Luna Carillo is here to defend her son, Keith and isn’t backing down unless justice is served.

James slumps, if it’s possible, in his chair even more than before, his mouth in a tight line and Lance feels like if he could, he’d bail his ass out of here any minute. Amelia narrows her eyes at his mom, whom doesn’t even spare her a glance, and that looks so much alike James’s expression that Lance gets a whiplash of how much they actually look alike. Their hair is the same color, although hers is definitely styled better than the idiotic (at least in Lance’s opinion) bang James has. Her eyes are hazel, however, so maybe the brown eyes are the dad contribution.

But the expressions, the mimics, the way she acts so bossy and dismissive is the exact same behavior James also owns. She shuffles a bit in her seat and her manicured fingers start tapping on the screen of her phone. Maybe she’s deciding if it’s worth it going in a battle against his mother, a woman who clearly isn’t backing down any time soon.

Ryner must feel the tension, since she goes at the window to open it and the fresh, cold morning air fills the room. The sun is shining through, lightning up the whole cabinet, which is actually nicely painted and decorated. There are birds chirping softly which is mixed with coach Luxia’s yelling at her students to run faster. The sounds of multiple feet scraping the cemented ground is a bit comforting at this point, so Lance crosses his arms and leans lazily backwards, happy and content that at least he’s not having his first class.

“Kennedy, don’t talk while you’re running you’re gonna tire out even more!” Coach Luxia claps her hands as she demands. “And Michaels – don’t you even dare slow down, you can do it C’MON! Kogane, I know damn well you can run fast, but don’t go lazing around with Holt! Both of you I want tempo, _tempo_!”

The reaction to Keith’s surname is immediate and Lance would’ve laughed at how ridiculous they all looked, if it wasn’t for him perking up like a puppy too. Shiro discreetly leans towards the window to maybe see said “lazing”, Amelia tilts her head on the side, while James’s head snaps up, but then falls down just as quickly. His mom snorts quietly on his right and he turns on his side only to meet a teasing grin. Lance goes hot all over, embarrassment showing up on his face along with the redness to his ears.

The principal is the only one not affected by Keith’s surname being yelled and she comes back from her place from next to the window, sitting down on her big leather chair behind her desk. She leans her elbows on it and clasps her hands together, curling her fingers as if she’ll start praying to any deity to come and save her from this shit. Lance doesn’t think he can resent her.

“Mr. Shirogane, did you witness any comments made by Mr. Griffin towards Mr. Ramirez when this occurred?”

_Ah shit_, Lance thinks.

Shiro for sure didn’t see nor heard any of the comments and the insults they threw at each other yesterday. He knew James is the cause of all of their troubles right now and Lance knows Shiro would want Ryner to punish Griffin more for bothering Keith, but the truth is that Shiro wasn’t there and whatever his opinion or thoughts are, they won’t have any weight on the truth, that is that they were alone and everything they’ve said is only between Lance and James. It’s up to them if they’ll tell the truth or not.

“I wasn’t.”

Shiro doesn’t show any particular emotion, but the tightness in his voice speaks to Lance more than ever.

_My hands are tied._

“Mhm, and was there any tension between them before the fight?”

Shiro shifts on his feet and then leans on the wall next to the window. Lance still doesn’t see anything than a complete neutral face, but then something on his expression changes as if he starts remembering something. His eyebrows draw closer to each other and he doesn’t move, even when his white bang lightly falls on his eyes. He starts tapping his fingers against his prosthetic and nods to himself, apparently confirming something to himself.

“Actually, there wasn’t any tension between them at first, but James for sure was having some trouble with one of the boys from my team,” Shiro provides with a steady voice and looks towards Ryner who rises her brows in curiosity. The principal turns to James.

“Is that correct, Mr. Griffin?”

James’s mother sends him a quizzical glance and Lance feels his mouth curling in satisfaction. For a hot minute he forgot that O’Connor and Griffin almost jumped on each other like angry animals. His own mother shifts next to him and her perfume hits his right side gently as she waves a hand through her hair that has been let down. Rachel braided the front part of it so it doesn’t get in her face, but Lance felt like his mother looked the most beautiful when she didn’t even try. After all, he had to get his drop dead gorgeous face from somewhere, right? (_Not that he felt particularly drop dead gorgeous right now with his black eye and skin that was fine, but still felt dirty to him, because he didn’t get to do his skin routine before he went to sleep and this morning._)

James sighs and nods, his eyes shifting all over the room, looking everywhere except for Ryner and Amelia. Lance hears coach Luxia blowing her whistle and the sound pierces the silence in the room.

“What’s his name?” Ryner asks and unlocks her holographic screen in front of her. She starts scrolling through something that must be a list of names of all the students in the school. Only Shiro can see since he’s next to her, but his eyes are glued to the window watching whatever it’s outside which Lance assumes is Keith.

“Julien O’Connor, ma’am,” James mumbles.

Ryner nods and squints her eyes when she types his name. “He is having chemistry currently. He’ll be saved I guess.”

Everyone huffs a little bit, Ryner for the first time even looks amused, but that quickly changes. She taps on a button next to her keyboard that glows red and she leans forward it.

“Ryner speaking. Julien O’Connor is expected into the principle office right now, no questions asked. Thank you.”

She backs away from the button and closes the holoscreen. Her earrings with forest green gems inside them dangle next to her face, which is not exactly cold, but it’s not approachable either.

Lance actually likes Mrs. Ryner, she’s a very chill principle and steps up when it’s necessary. This does not happen often, which in Lance’s opinion speaks for itself as her work as a leader of the Voltron High School. Lance isn’t angry with her, obviously, he punched a fellow teammate, classmate and is getting rightly punished. It sucks that everyone might not know the actual reason about why Lance exploded like a time bomb, judging by how unwilling he and James are to talk about yesterday. Lance knows he’s embarrassed, he _feels_ it. If James wasn’t, he wasn’t going to escape his eyes whenever they accidently met. He still can’t decide if he feels good with the fact that James feels shitty or not.

On one hand, he feels he shouldn’t care about how James feels, because all the bullshit he said to Lance was awfully insulting and rude and he deserves what he’ll get in the near future. But on the other, like Kinkade and Amelia said, he may have actually took the break up between he and Keith harder than everyone thought. Which isn’t an excuse for being a major asshole, but his empathetic side gets it. He understands. He knows the feeling, the spiral you get yourself into when all you can think about is just one person and nothing else matters until they look at you in the same way you look at them.

He wishes he hadn’t.

“Mr. Ramirez, you’ve been awfully quiet this whole time,” all of a sudden he’s brought back into the real world when Ryner addresses him, “don’t you have anything to say in your defense? Were you provoked as your mother suggests?”

Lance looks at her and his heart jumps, because of all the attention that is suddenly focused on him. He can sense Amelia’s narrow gaze piercing his neck. Unconsciously he glances at Shiro, who hasn’t managed to change his face at all, but Lance swears he can see encouragement in those usually warm grey eyes that have gone cold for now. His mother puts her hand on his shoulder and the simple touch helps him even more to gather his shit together and say something that will make sense.

“Well, in my opinion, I was definitely provoked. As my family and friends know, I’m not a violent person at all and while it’s true that there weren’t any witnesses I can assure you, that if you ask everyone around they will all tell you I wouldn’t punch unless…” he flexes his fingers and scratches his chin in a nervous tick, “unless someone I love is mentioned.”

All the people in the office still at his confession. James freezes and Lance knows he’s probably panicking if he’ll spit out more, but deep down they both know that it’d mean Lance risks to out himself. Not only the fucking mayor and the principal would know about him being bisexual and his crush on Keith, but also Shiro who is literally the cliché macho muscular brother that would make bread out of his bones if something happens to his little cousin. Just because his mother knows and he’s planning to tell everyone before graduation, doesn’t mean he wants to do it _now_.

Ryner pursues her lips and tilts her head. “Are you implying Mr. Griffin made inappropriate comments about someone close to you that made you act like a middle schooler?”

Her tone is as bitter as a lemon and Lance grimaces slightly at it. “You could say that, yes.”

“And you both refuse to talk about it because…?” Ryner urges and Lance wants the earth to open so it can swallow him, because this is not only awkward and embarrassing, but weird as hell too. They’re low key, without knowing, discussing their love lives, which is just an experience Lance never wanted to have nor have thought would happen to him.

When they both don’t answer, Ryner heavily breathes through her nose and exhales like this is taking too much of her precious energy. Lance has the feeling she’d rather be in boring teacher meetings than doing this.

“Mr. Griffin, do you at least confirm you’ve provoked Mr. Ramirez in any way?”

Amelia looks skeptical that her son might’ve done something as stupid as this, but when James says yes, she closes her eyes and leans back in her chair. He hears some mumbling between them and Lance is going to be honest – he totally wants to know what they’re speaking to each other. He hears faint words such as ‘_stupid_’ and ‘_didn’t mean to_’, but their mumbling now which is getting louder and more aggressive gets cut off when someone lands a sudden knock on the door.

_Julien_.

“Come in,” Ryner yells out loud enough and the door swishes to open itself.

Julien O’Connor enters the room and Lance almost laughs at his ashen face and his green eyes that meet everyone’s gazes in the room. He’s in a black t-shirt with a sheep on it that dabs and its wool is rainbow colored, instead of white. His jeans are ripped and his hands are behind his back. Lance notices him sending a nicely hidden panicked look at Shiro who in turn only nods reassuringly.

“Mr. O’Connor – good morning. I’m sorry for interrupting your class,” says Ryner politely and points towards the chair that is between Lance and James, that originally was meant for Shiro. Julien steps in and hesitantly takes a seat while funnily his blonde curls jump with him. There’s a fair scar on his forehead that’s at the beginning of his hairline, Lance assumes, since it’s hidden by his hair. Julien notices his staring and side-eyes him for a quick second, before he turns his full attention onto the principal.

“Uh, good morning to you too ma’am. Can’t say I’m regretting that you called me in the middle of chemistry though,” an awkward laugh follows which is met with heavy silence.

“Right,” blunt as ever Ryner continues, “you’re here to confirm and explain some information regarding your teammates Mr. Ramirez and Mr. Griffin.”

She takes off the tiny reading glasses that rest on her slightly crooked noise and looks pointedly at the junior whose hands are fiddling nervously in his lap. Lance notices some dried, smeared paint on the back of his hand, and that his nails are painted in an amateurish technique in pastel pink and blue. _It must be his little sister_, Lance thinks, since he’s mentioned her a lot when they talk. Kind of brings him back, memories of Veronica, Nadia and Sylvio letting them do whatever to his hair and skin just to get a smile and pleased giggling.

“Ohhh,” all of a sudden he lights up like a Christmas tree, “is this because Lance punched James yesterday?”

Lance groans silently and puts his head in his hand that is propped on the armrest. “Julien…” he sighs out.

“What?” His tone is defensive, “It’s what happened, don’t blame me you went all murder-y on him, man,” he whispers the last part to Lance conspiratorially. Before Lance can defend himself that he didn’t go ‘murder-y’ on James, Ryner butts in.

“Mr. O’Connor, did you witness perhaps any comments made by Mr. Griffin that might have led to Mr. Ramirez’s aggression?” She starts cleaning her glasses with a fancy napkin that has the Voltron initials embroidered on it and raises a brow at him. Julien squirms in his chair, easy and free-willed attitude melting away under her laser gaze.

“Umm, actually no,” he averts his eyes, “but the team has lots of versions of what might have caused it,” and he offers a cautious smile.

“Of course they have,” Shiro mutters and rolls his eyes along with Lance who also smiles a bit at the thought of the boys discussing and scheming over what could’ve possibly made Lance so angry that he’d punch his own teammate.

He hopes they’re not afraid of him or some stupid shit like that. Lance certainly didn’t have the demeanor of a tough, frightening guy and would have trouble keeping it up anyways. Unlike Keith for an example.

“The reason I called you in here, Mr. O’Connor, is that according to Mr. Shirogane you were having some issues with Mr. Griffin yourself before the fight occurred. Care to enlighten us?”

Julien sits up straighter than before and combs a hair through his curls. Which confirms to Lance that the scar starts from his hairline. He briefly wonders how he got it.

“Well uh I-,” all of a sudden Lance notices the way his cheeks have darkened and it’s awfully visible, because of his fair skin. He’s confused on why that must be his reaction when his mind flashes back to the scene of when he and Kinkade ran up to see why Julien was so infuriated with James.

_“Are you going to punch me? Bet you want to since your hands are obviously itching to do it? Were you going to punch Keith too? Dick.”_

_“Ask that abusive piece of sh-“_

_“I don’t want to play with assholes who harass other people. Is that so bad?”_

And he immediately gets it. Oh god, this is also cute, but funny at the same. Julien was called in here, because he defended his crush-but-not-really in front of his ex-boyfriend. This is so golden and Lance almost coos at the sight of Julien being too embarrassed to admit the truth.

“I mean uh-,” he stutters over himself and Lance hides a snicker in his palm. He knows he’s being a bit of an asshole, but he’s just amazed at himself for being jealous over the junior that shamelessly flirted with Keith months ago – who now is blushing over the mere thought of him. He really can’t blame him (_that would’ve been extremely hypocritical_), but still. Lance almost wishes to grab his cheeks and meddle with them like a grandma.

“Spit it out Mr. O’Connor,” Ryner says tiredly.

“There was this… uh _thing_ that happened during lunch…”

_Uh oh. _

For the first time he’s been here, Lance feels almost afraid for James. Julien is on the verge of exposing him for that scene he caused in front of everyone in the cafeteria and how Pidge managed to blackmail him with his mother’s number. A quick glance at James and his suspicions are confirmed – Griffin looks positively terrified at whatever is going to come out of O’Connor’s mouth next.

“_Thing_?” Ryner potently asks which makes even Lance’s insides freeze and he’s not even the one guilty.

“Yes ma’am,” Julien gulps, “James kind of cornered his ex in front of everyone and I might’ve overreacted a bit during practice.”

Well at least he admits it. Lance is still perplexed over the fact he used the word ‘_abusive_’ for Griffin, when he didn’t have any idea about their relationship.

“Define ‘overreacted’?” The principal urges and Julien grimaces, still refusing to look at her.

“I kind of called him… abusive,” he finally says and the reaction in the room is instant. Ryner furrows his eyebrows, James lets out a sound between grumble and a groan, Amelia gasps out loud, while his mother next to him says ‘oh my’. Of course, Lance and Shiro already knew this, but it doesn’t stop Shiro from throwing stealthily a _look_ at both, James and Julien.

“This is simply ridiculous!” Amelia proclaims and stands up from her seat. “I’ve been a clear witness of said relationship and I think I’m one… no, _two_ hundred percent sure my son is _not_ abusive!”

Her eyes are wild, skipping from one person to another while they mostly stay at Julien. The younger boy is deflating with every word. Lance feels bad for him for being at the end of such wrath, but it’s true. The word is exaggerating the situation way too much.

“Mrs. Andrews calm down please, the boy already confirmed it was overreacting,” Ryner slides into the conversation and she also gets up. She puts on her glasses and Lance wonders if she thinks she looks more peremptory with them or not. For him, she looks almighty either way.

Amelia throws another dirty look at Julien, but complies and sits down with an angry huff. James next to her has changed positions and is now leaning his elbows onto his knees, head hanging low like he’s ashamed.

With a nod to herself, Ryner turns to Julien and her gaze is hard. “I hope you know the huge amount of weight this word has, Mr. O’Connor. I certainly wish you fix your vocabulary next time you want to do a good thing.”

Julien nods up and down so slowly and Lance is amazed how from a blush-y mess he quickly turned into a petrified statue.

“Let me guess then,” Ryner stomps from behind of her desk so she can stand fully in front of them and she leans back, while crossing her arms. Okay, back again to being demanding for answers. “Mr. Griffin’s ex is the reason you tried to fight with him.”

It doesn’t even sound like a question, but more like a statement. Lance feels a bit afraid, heart thumping loudly in his chest, terrified at the possibility of Ryner who might sniff correctly on Keith being the reason he punched James too.

They both nod, but Julien kind of grimaces, probably regretting for trying to act like some prince on a white horse.

“What’s their name? This fight, I guess, had a prequel that apparently needs another provider for information. I’m not trusting any of you for now.”

_Oh fuck_. Now they’re fucked. This is going to be _so_ embarrassing. _So awkward._ There are literally three boys liking the same person in this room. If Keith comes, it’ll just be a blushing disaster for all of them. Though, Keith would probably be a standoff, crossed arms and a frown on his handsome face answering without stumbling over himself. “_It always must be done_” is definitely a Keith motto, if he even bothered to have one of course.

Before they can answer, Shiro grumbles out, “No need to call him from the computer, he’s down there slacking off during the volleyball game.”

Shiro is doing shit job at hiding the amusement in his tone and eyes and Lance gets reminded for a thousandth time during his friendship with both cousins, how much they love each other. How soft they are when either of them is mentioned, even when they don’t wanna admit it sometimes for the sake of their sibling dynamic.

Ryder is mid-way to pressing the red button, but stops at Shiro’s words. She waves a hand at the man and says, “Very well then. Call him here.”

_Big_ mistake. A faint smirk appears on Shiro and yes, that guy is surely a six year old hidden in the body of a middle aged, married guy who is also one of the most famous athletes in his decade. He twists his torso towards the big window, puts two fingers in his mouth and _whistles_. Loud. Lance and his mother laugh, along with Ryner who tries to hide it with a cough. Julien and James are pale like ghosts. Amelia looks, dare Lance say, _excited_? What?! Did she and Keith even interact at all?

That’d be so weird – Lance thinks – Keith being all buddy-buddy with the mayor.

“KEITH KOGANE IS DEMANDED INTO THE PRINCIPLE’S OFFICE NOW!”

The screaming and the chattering absurdly stops and it gets dead silent.

But then…

“WHAT?”

And that is undoubtedly Keith’s voice. And despite seeing him less than an hour ago, the reaction is still the same if he sees him even after two years later. His heart flutters in his chest like hummingbird’s wings and it feels like someone spills something molten in his belly. He hopes his cheeks aren’t as red and hot as he feels them, but the teasing giggle on his right coming from his mother means that his hopes are in vain.

“NOW KEITH!”

“BUT WHY?”

“AKIRA KOGANE, DO NOT MAKE ME-“

“I’M COMING, I’M COMING!”

Then the yelling resumes just as fast as it stopped and Shiro turns back to them with a grin. Usually, Lance thinks, this might be taken by some people as unprofessionalism, but judging by the way Ryner smiles sneakily under her nose, she for sure isn’t “some people”.

“Until Mr. Kogane arrives, I’ll have to ask both of you,” and she points at James and _Julien_, _the irony_, “to behave. Whatever love triangle you’ve been messed in isn’t a matter for here.”

Lance holds in himself a howl over how inaccurate this shit is. Ryner should’ve pointed at _him_, but hey – he’s not complaining at all if that means the secret that he’s in love with his best friend stays hidden for more time. Preferably until he dies.

It all goes to shit, when James fucking snorts and mutters, “It’s not Julien you should be pointing at.”

It’s not loud at all, in fact it’s pure accident that Lance even heard him, but the increase of his heartbeat skyrockets at this comment and it’s a pure miracle how Lance didn’t get up to blacken his other eye. Goddamn, it’s like he’s a decent guy one second and then a complete douche the next one. At times Lance is even surprised how he managed to sweep Keith off his feet. They had some similarities, sure, but Lance thought that after Rolo Keith would’ve gone for boys more like… him. Which sounds so stupid, but it somehow makes sense for him since he’s always wanted to be enough for Keith – either a best friend or a boyfriend, it didn’t matter. 

Before something else happens, like Lance doing or saying something completely stupid, he is saved by the soft swishing of the door behind him.

Or maybe _not_ saved at all with the way all the blood rushes ten times faster to his cheeks at the Keith that meets him.

He tries so hard to turn away or to give his friend an encouraging smile after he looks at the confusion on his sweaty face.

He’s in a black tank top, visibly wet from all the sweat, hoodie tied around his slim waist that Lance has touched before. He’s in goddamn skin tight _leggings_ that end in the middle of his calves that show off his amazing legs so nicely, Lance feels like he’ll choke on his droll soon. His hair is in a ponytail, bangs and strands that have escaped are sticking on his forehead and cheeks. Lance knows that it’s gross, but can’t help it. He goes back into times where it was normal for him to reach out to touch. To squeeze, to hold – _to bite_. His eyes track the sweat on his delicate collarbones and he thinks _‘I’ve kissed him there.’_ His hands have travelled on places only few have dared to go to.

Now, it’s like a blissful dream he’s had, to reminisce the times where Keith has thrived and came alive under his fingertips. His moans and whispers are still sealed in his brain, the way his body has shook with pleasure and Keith’s demands for more, the lust in those eyes, those pink lips kissing and tugging his ear, these hands of an artist tugging on his hair, tracing, holding. It’s like he can still hear everything, next to him.

_‘P-Please Lance, oh god, oh god, oh god, just like that, keep going – don’t stop. Fuck, you’re so good Lance, _so good_, please let me-‘_

A discreet pinch on his right arm jerks him away from whatever arousing thoughts and memories he was starting to receive from his brain.

“Ouch,” he whispers and glares at his mother, who gives him a pointed look. Everything is too hot all of a sudden and Lance will start praying to any God that there is, that he doesn’t pop a boner just because of Keith’s presence in the room.

“Mr. Kogane so nice of you to join us,” Ryner happily declares, claps her hands and Lance sees she’s genuinely smiling at Keith and _how the fuck is everyone in this school in love with him_? Not that he’s about to lie himself and wonder why, since it’s obvious that when you catch the faintest glimpse into his personality you immediately fall for him like you’re a newborn baby deer on ice. Lance has experienced that first hand.

This time, when Lance looks back at the black haired, he wills himself to keep these _exciting _images away from his head. Keith looks at him quickly and raises a sharp eyebrow as if asking ‘why the fuck am I here?’, but instantly returns Mrs. Ryner’s smile. And it’s a sincere one, which surprises the hell out of Lance. That means that the principal and he have definitely had other interactions other than in here, in her cabinet. He’ll ask him later for sure.

“Morning, ma’am,” he greets the principal and then turns towards Shiro as he puts a smile that is now _way too sugary_ and sweet for it to be a true Keith smile, “coach Shirogane. Nice yelling from the window.”

“I figured you’d appreciate it,” he fires back just as sappy.

“So,” Ryner cuts in, “I’m apologizing for the interruption, but you’re here to put some insight on a certain situation that occurred yesterday. Unfortunately, we can’t do it without you because _someone_ here,” a look at Julien, “might not be accurate.”

“Sure,” Keith says shrugging as he crosses his muscular arms, that flex so beautifully that it’s physically painful for Lance he can’t reach and feel them up. He distinctively notices some kind of colorful bracelet on his right wrist and is curious from where he got it. Keith is literally the definition of indifference as he steps in closer, his front awfully close to the back of Julien’s chair who is sporting such a red face, it’s like he’s feverish and in an urgent need for a cold cloth for his “high temperature”.

Keith is clearly refusing to look at James, though he cutely waves at Amelia that she politely returns with a small smile of her own. As Ryner tells Shiro to close the window, Keith leans into Lance’s space and for a fleeting second, with a wildly beating heart, he thinks he’s going to have his cheek kissed as ridiculous as that sounds, but instead…

“Hi Luna.”

Lance’s mother positively beams at the boy next to him. “Hi mijo, I hope you’re alright after yesterday,” she says gently.

“I literally got punched,” Lance interferes and points frantically at his eye with his bandaged hand.

“Yes, after _you_ started it. Just because I’m defending you, doesn’t mean I’m still not disappointed in your actions,” his mother hisses and levels him a fiery scowl that is a strange imitation of Keith’s usual expression.

“As I was saying,” Ryner suddenly chimes in again, “Mr. Kogane you’ll only be needed for a few questions – that’s it.”

Keith leans away from Lance’s face and the brunette grieves at the fact his warmth and the nice smell of his perfume flee away with him, but he manages to concentrate on the conversation and what will bring on the table for all of them, especially Lance who has the most to lose, since he’s already accepted into Altea and with a scholarship. If Ryner reports that, they will either cancel it, which doesn’t sound so bad (it’s not like they still struggle with the money as before) or kick him out. If Lance gets kicked out of Altea it’s going to be a _disaster_. This is not an alternative variant he thought about.

Keith nods, but then looks down and points at Julien. “What is he doing here?”

“The same reason you’re here, I suppose,” Ryner waves him away, “Mr. Kogane what happened yesterday during lunch? And before you think of lying, I can easily go through the camera footage, which I prefer not to so please, be honest with us all. Not that I can’t ask the other gentlemen here, of course, but it seems like you’re the turning point of it all.”

The black haired crosses his arms once again and his face hardens in a way that means he’s ready to do whatever it’s right regardless of the consequences. Damn, how much Lance loves him.

“James and I dated for two months and then we broke up. He started following me the next week afterwards, but I thought, if I ignore him he’ll go away which obviously didn’t happen,” Keith still refuses to look at Griffin, but the same can’t be said for him. The brunette has slipped a secret gaze up at his ex and is staring at him like he’s seeing him for the first time which is just ridiculous in Lance’s opinion.

Ryner tilts her head on the side, “According to Mr. O’Connor he “cornered” you in front of everyone. Is that true?”

Keith huffs a bit humorlessly and Lance notices his arms tightening.

“He did.”

He obviously isn’t going into the details and Lance doesn’t understand _why_. Is it because of a way to say ‘_truce_’ to his ex and make it obvious that it’s time to let go? Or maybe this is Keith’s weird behavior where he doesn’t want to be seen as “weak”? Because without asking, the Cuban boy knows Keith feels like he could’ve prevented the whole thing if he could. Which is absurd in Lance’s eyes, since James is at fault for not leaving him alone, when it was obvious his company wasn’t wanted nor needed.

Ryner squints her eyes at Keith and then they shift at James. For a quick moment Lance thinks she’ll demand why Griffin did that, but alas she keeps her mouth shut and only nods at Keith. “Would you say Mr. Griffin is abusive, Mr. Kogane? And I trust you to know the true meaning of that word.”

This time she doesn’t throw a meaningful glare at Julien, but it’s a clear intention she’s still admonishing the younger boy.

Keith lifts a surprised brow, though somehow, stays still apathetic. “_Abusive_? That’s simply laughable. Trust me ma’am, if for any second I suspected my boyfriend is being abusive to me, I would have left the relationship immediately.”

Any tension in Amelia’s shoulders leaves like someone lifted a bang full of brick off her shoulders, while James mockingly scoffs at her. Shiro is still acting like a statue next to the window, while Ryner lifts her hands to massage her temples in what seems like it’s clear annoyance.

“Mr. O’Connor – you’re dismissed,” she says without looking and Julien doesn’t waste any second bolting up from his seat. He clears his throat awkwardly, but before he heads for the door, with visible discomfort looks down at James.

“Umm, I-I’m sorry for calling you abusive dude, it wasn’t cool of me honestly and uhh-,” he combs his hand through his hair nervously and then he looks at Keith who’s watching with confusion what’s unravelling in front of him, “I’m sorry to you too.”

Keith’s forehead wrinkles, but when he opens his mouth to answer Julien yells a mildly loud “Okay, bye!” and his sneakers make a noisy squeaky sound when he runs at the exit like a scaredy-cat.

The white door opens automatically with a swoosh and after some quiet seconds, after he’s made sure Julien won’t hear, Lance allows himself a quiet cackle. All eyes turn to him, but instead of wavering Lance starts laughing even louder. His mother whacks him lightly on the shoulder, but when he turns it’s bright as a day she’s trying hard to hide a smile.

“Oh, c’moooon,” Lance defends himself whiningly, “it was honestly so amusing to watch this. He’s a good kid, a bit confused, but his crush on Keith is one of the best things I’ve ever witnessed. And he doesn’t even hide it.”

Unexpectedly it’s Shiro who backs him up with a snort, “It’s definitely an experience.”

Ryner follows with a chuckle and a shake of her head.

“Young love is something else,” she clears her throat and turns at Keith who is looking down at his feet, inspecting his shoes like he’s not hearing anything, “Mr. Kogane did you know about the fight yesterday?”

Keith hums, “I had a,” and he gives a sneaky smile, “reliable source.”

“I told him,” Shiro deadpans.

Lance is suddenly once again brought back into the past and puffs his cheeks in annoyance. His ass is honestly starting to hurt from sitting on this uncomfortable chair and tries to sit more properly, because he can sense this conversation is ending soon.

“Mr. Kogane, Mr. Ramirez says he was provoked and that’s why he decided to solve the problem by punching his own teammate in the face. Would you trust that that claim?” Ryner asks and begins toying with her badge.

“I don’t trust said claim,” Keith scoffs and before Lance can let out an offended ‘hey’, the boy continues, “_I believe it._”

And for the first time ever since Keith has stepped in he looks down at James and starts speaking directly at him. “Because let’s be honest, your temper is just as bad as mine sometimes and you cover it up with your attitude of an asshole – don’t even try to deny it,” he sneers.

He turns to Ryner, “So yes, Lance may be a lot of things, I’ve known him for four years after all, but he never had a desire to fight _anyone_. He’s one of the kindest people I know, so in my humble opinion, don’t expect any other fights unless it’s about his _family_. That’s all I have to say.”

Keith meets Ryner’s eyes with pure determination and Lance only from his stance and voice can perceive the main message. Keith is not backing down.

The Cuban boy suddenly gets filled with so many intense emotions that he’s not sure how they haven’t escaped out of him yet. His heartbeat increases as he gazes at the pure protectiveness Keith radiates. Lance almost gives into the desire to just get up and kiss that beautiful, fiery, selfless, kind, temperamental, quick witted and sarcastic boy on that pretty mouth of his until they can barely breathe. A desire he has given into before and wouldn’t mind if it happens again. And again. _And again._

The silence that follows is uncomfortably long and Lance feels the nervousness creeping closer until it’s deeply settled into his gut. His mother next to him sighs quietly, but Lance can’t differ if it’s a relieved one or a sigh that means she’s preparing for the worst. He doesn’t dare to turn at James or Amelia due to the second hand embarrassment, but he catches Shiro smiling at his brother in what Lance can only call pride.

“Very well then,” Ryner lets out and her tone is the definition of nonchalance, “thanks for the insight, Mr. Kogane, you’re free to go back in class.”

Lance glances up at Keith shyly and catches him nodding at their principle just in time. He then manages to look down with those gorgeous eyes at Lance and give him a lopsided smile. Lance’s stomach twists.

“Have a nice day, Mrs. Ryner. Luna, Mrs. Andrews you too,” he waves at them all and Lance watches them both smiling like he’s the best thing that ever grazed the earth, “coach Shirogane.”

He grins like a little shit, but before Shiro can say something back, Keith is out of the room.

He can hear his footsteps fading away with every second and this is _it._

Ryner will give her punishment. His whole destiny is in her hands and Lance has faith in her she won’t drop it down and stomp on it in front of his eyes.

“I must admit, I changed my opinion on a lot of things in the span of twenty minutes,” she initiates and her tone is intrigued, like she has more questions than answers at the end, “but this is my decision and you will accept it. No objections.”

She peers at them judgmentally under her tiny glasses and just like at the beginning she circles around her desk and sits down on her leather chair. Opens her holoscreen and Lance feels like he has a ball in his throat. The anticipation is physically painful and he weaves a hand through his hair, bracing for the storm that is about to wreck him and his mother.

Ryner’s quiet tapping on her keyboard is the only sound in the room, but Lance can also hear his own shortened breathing. They stay like that for one minute, but for what it feels like to Lance is an hour, and the principal finally closes everything and looks right at Lance and James, calculating smart eyes jumping from the one to the other.

She sighs.

“Both of you will have equal punishments. You both will do community service work for the whole month, when May starts. That includes – helping the sanitors on the Mondays, Tuesdays and Fridays after your classes end and on the Wednesdays and Thursdays you work in the library, helping out,” she grabs her work tablet and taps some things on it. “I also would like one session with the school’s psychologist, whenever you decide. That’s it.”

She gets up from her seat and grabs a tablet pen from her bag as she starts heading towards James’s mother. “If you two try to hurt each other one more time don’t think I won’t suspend or expel you.”

Amelia takes the offered pen from Ryner’s outstretched hand and side eyes her son for a moment, before she writes her signature on the screen. Ryner thanks her and then comes towards Lance and his mother whom doesn’t waste a second and quickly scribbles off her own, next to Amelia’s.

“Very well,” Ryner takes the tablet from his mother’s arms and puts it back on her desk, carefully.

“I hope you two gentlemen learned your lesson and next time you’ll think before you act or say something stupid that would affect not only you, but the people around you,” she says placidly and as if it has been trained, the bell rings just on time.

A song Lance doesn’t recognize starts sounding softly through the speakers, but his mother must know it since she starts humming immediately in tune with the rhythm.

“Uhh – before you dismiss us ma’am,” James calls out, “what kind of sanitor work?”

Lance looks at Ryner, expecting a long list with detailed descriptions on what they’re supposed to. But Ryner only smirks, in what Lance can only call – a pure villainous way and tilts her head on one side.

“Oh you _definitely_ won’t be disappointed, Mr. Griffin.”

{ * }

3 weeks later – May 2055

“Are you sure? Like _actually_ sure? Because I’ve asked like, literally everyone, but you’re the only one in the goddamn family besides mama and Veronica who have a stable fashion sense!”

“Rachel, I _clearly_ can’t help you properly for choosing a prom dress right now!”

“It’s only for one minute, seriously! I only picked around fifteen dresses so-“

“_Fifteen_?! Are you insane?! If we’re choosing a dress for the prom we’re _not_ doing it in the fucking library-“

“But-“

“SHHH!”

Lance almost drops all the books he’s collected from the student tables as he startles from the sudden noise on his right. Ina Leifsdottir glares at them in her own passive indifferent way that only she can pull off, her crystal blue eyes narrowing at the Ramirez siblings in annoyance for them speaking too loud next to her.

Lance quickly takes action and bumps Rachel’s shoulder with his own, so they can move away and not disturb Mrs. My Soul Is Dead. He mumbles an apologetic sorry and wills his sister to the direction towards the Kid’s books shelves where from his three week experience in helping here, knows no one will be there. He looks around one more time in case someone is too close for their loud voices and when he makes sure they’re alone, Lance turns around to glare at her.

Her dark brown eyes widen, but then she scowls when she sees he’s not exactly welcoming. “Oh c’mon, not my fault something crawled up her ass!”

“Rachel!” Lance exclaims as whispery as he can, because if they both started talking like they usually do, the librarian would kick them both out and Lance _certainly_ doesn’t want another visit to the principle.

His sister huffs and rolls her eyes.

“Okay, okay I’ll be nice,” she mumbles, but suspiciously her face lightens up immediately as she whips out her phone from her back pocket and unlocks it, “now will you help me with the dresses, pleeease?”

She looks up at him with her puppy eyes (that she learned from _him_ by the way) and tilts her head as if that will convince him to put an end to his work just like that, when she knows that he only has one week left until it’s over.

She has clearly prepared herself for a shopping spree with friends since her appearance is fancier than what she usually puts on during the school hours. She’s in a black crop top with long sleeves that reaches just a little above her belly button with ‘LA ROSALIA’ in big white fancy letters written on it. Lance assumes that this probably belonged to their mother, since Rachel mainly only listens to rock and indie. That – and his mother was a huge Rosalía fan, when she was younger. She has blue ripped mom jeans on that reach her calves and white sneakers that Lance specifically remembers she bought last week, because Lance himself and Pidge were with her.

She has left her hair in the way it usually is – a long, black curly beautiful mess. Lance had always envied her for taking after their mother’s hair, but when he saw their struggles with it behind the scenes, he quickly changed his mind. His hair is actually naturally curly, but it always gets in the way whenever he’s training so most of the time he just straightens it. It’s useless sometimes, when he’s sweating too much and it goes back to normal and multiple people have told him he looks better with his curly hair, but Lance feels more confident like that so he doesn’t particularly care.

“Rach, you know I want to, but I really can’t at the moment,” he emphasizes his point when he pointedly looks down at the pile of books he’s holding in his arms, “why can’t we do it after I’m finished?”

Rachel’s only response is a disappointed sigh and her nose scrunches in a typical Luis fashion.

“I’m meeting up with some classmates in like ten minutes or so, and I just want to have a general idea on what I specifically am looking for, because final exams are starting soon and then I won’t have time at all, because my entering exam is in one week and I am so stressed out about everything and if at the end I have a terrible dress that’d be a total disaster-“

“Woah, woah, woah, hold your horses sis,” Lance quickly drops the books he’s trying to hold at this point on a nearby table and the sound of the collision is so loud that Lance winces along with it.

However, he quickly recovers so he can grasp on his sister’s biceps as if to stop her from hyperventilating. Her eyes are skipping on every possible place she can see, anxiety slipping out of her like water that doesn’t have any space left and is finally pouring out. He knew Rachel was having trouble with choosing her degree and university in general. She finally decided to study fashion and modelling in New York. It isn’t something she has been absolutely passionate about like Lance was with basketball, Keith with art or Veronica with law, but his family was nevertheless proud and happy for her. She is young and has the opportunities to make mistakes and try different things. She could be anything and Lance wouldn’t love her less.

“Calm down, Rach just breathe,” he says soothingly and runs his hands up and down in a calming manner.

She nods lightly at his words and closes her eyes tightly, trying to match with her brother’s in and out takes of oxygen. A minute passes or so, when she finally groans quietly and buries her head in his chest. Her huge hair tickles his chin and he puts his cheek on it, enveloping her in his arms, hugging her tightly and protectively. They may be twins, but he came out first even if it was only ten minutes prior, so he is technically still the bigger brother.

“Ugh, I’m so sorry. I know you have work, but,” she mutters and looks up at him, sadness dancing in her gaze, “we just rarely see each other these days and I _know_ we have the whole summer together before you go all the way to California and I go to study in New York… I just… want to spend all the time I can with you.”

“Oh, _hermana_…” Lance mumbles and squishes her face against his chest once again, while this time he strokes her hair carefully as he kisses the top of it gently and lovingly.

And it hurts.

As much as a family man that he claims he is, he has been spending less time with his siblings and Nadia and Sylvio lately. It was only not too long ago, when he talked to his mother and came out to her, that he again truly had a heart-to-heart with one of the members of his family. He loves all of them with all of his heart and he’d do anything for them, but with all the Allura and Keith drama that he has caught himself into like a fly in a spider web – it felt like he couldn’t even _open_ his mouth to admit that he’s been having problems.

“Listen, why don’t you cancel your meeting with your friends if you want - so we can go together, yes? I have,” he glances quickly at the clock that he luckily can see due to his height, “around thirty minutes before I’m done.”

He shakes her shoulders jokingly and is pleased when he hears her giggling. “What do you think?”

Rachel breaks away from his embrace and punches him teasingly on the stomach. He punches her back in the shoulder.

“I’d love to, but I can’t,” she says and continues to jab him and starts imitating a boxer hitting him whenever her hands manage to find an open space as Lance tries to defend himself.

“Uh why?” He asks and raises an eyebrow. She laughs instead of answering him and changes her tactic of paining him. He manages to catch one of her fingers in his own and twists it in a way he knows is painful, because she and Veronica have done the same to him millions of times just as he has done to them. Rachel doubles down and groans in pain, but quickly succeeds on stomping on his foot in revenge, growling as doing it so. Lance ouches loud enough and twists his sister’s finger even more, because just as much she’s a little shit so is he.

“_Ow ow ow ow_ Leandro, you’re gonna break my fucking finger, you bastard,” she starts whining and this time kicks him hard in the shin.

He lets go off her finger on instinct to hold his leg, that throbs after the pain she’s caused to it.

He knows, they _both_ know, that they’re acting like kids, but this is an usual occurrence that happens in their own house. Most of the time it’s either playful fighting, because they’re bored, but sometimes it’s more serious (_and by serious, Lance means life and death situations_) like who is the remote’s owner at that time or who gets to eat the leftovers from their mom’s cooking from the night before. Their mother has long gave up on splitting them up when they’re fighting and for the past ten years she just watches them burn as they hit each other like some stupid preschoolers. Lance still has a mark from Rachel’s teeth on his forearm from when they were ten and he hit her with the basketball and bloodied her nose.

Scary day in his young years.

“Ugh, asshole, I bet my leg is gonna have a bruise now,” Lance grumbles, but she knows that he doesn’t really care. Most of the time he bruises himself when he practices or simply when he stupidly bumps into some shit much more than Rachel or Veronica do it to him.

“Are you kidding me?! I can’t feel the blood going to my forefinger,” his sister says and Lance is forced to look at said finger, mainly because she shoves it in his face annoyingly. He slaps it away just to spite her and gets up from his crouched position. He wonders for a second if they’ve been too loud, but no one has complained yet, so either no one heard anything or no one cared as much as Ina. Most students who come here use headphones anyways.

“The blood ain’t going to your brain either I guess,” he replies with a smirk and snickers with satisfaction when she hits him again on the shoulder, however with a grin instead of a scowl.

“Ass,” she snorts, but gets cut off when her phone suddenly rings. It’s probably on silent mode, Lance assumes, since Rachel is the only one who can feel the vibrations of it. Since she pulled it out earlier, the phone is already in her hand and she looks down with her brows slightly furrowed. Lance can’t catch the name on the screen, before she _too quickly_ accomplishes to answer the call.

“Hi Will,” she says and Lance thinks to himself _not_ to act suspicious so he can eavesdrop properly like the good brother he is. He goes to the table he dropped the books on and gathers them all in one pile again, while moving slightly to the left.

“Yes yes, I’m sorry – I had to talk with my brother for a bit… Mhm sure sure… do you want something else?”

After a quick pause all of a sudden she _giggles_ and Lance dares to look behind him to see what’s happening, curiosity wining over him.

And _woah_.  
Okay.  
Time out.  
  
His sister is shyly biting her lip, cheeks a little bit flushed (which is kind of hard to see, because of her brown skin, but it’s _there_), her left hand fiddling with her sleeve that she has made a paw of, as she goes back and forth on her tip toes and back.

This is an obvious sign that his twin sister has a crush for the boy she’s currently talking to and for the sake of it Lance tries to wrack his brain over remembering who the hell is _Will_. Rachel has only had one serious boyfriend through her high school time and Lance has suspicions she had a bit of a friends with benefits situation with this one boy from Lance’s Spanish class, but that’s about Rachel’s love conquests.

He thinks anyways. It’s not like he was constantly stalking his sister.

She and he are similar in a lot of ways, but one of the things that sets them apart is definitely the fact that Lance is the romantic. Not to say she isn’t, but ever since Lance has had his first crush – the possibility of sharing his life with someone he adores has been a fascinating concept to him. Rachel has shared her fantasies of her dream boyfriend to him, but Lance could see that this was never her main priority nor something she desired to have with her whole soul, unlike Lance whose heart has been given to so many people, that sadly only some treated it the way he wanted; the way he deserved.

Even her previous boyfriend didn’t get her blushing this much and acting like a school girl… which she actually still is… _But not the point!_ Now he’s intrigued on who achieved to get Rachel acting like she wouldn’t usually do around someone she potentially likes.

Lance starts going through the list of all the boys named Will, that he could possibly know. It’s a pretty common name after all and he’s a social butterfly, so there must be a boy that caught Rachel’s attention that Lance may know too.

There’s the William that was Lance’s buddy in philosophy classes back when he was a sophomore, who moved out the next year one due to his mother’s job in Canada. There is also Will Lance-doesn’t-remember-his-surname, the boy who is somewhat a friend of Pidge so technically he hasn’t met him personally and he doubts Rachel has too. Left out of options (and out of boys named Will he’s supposed to know) Lance averts his eyes away from his sister, who obviously wants some privacy, as she has her own back turned on him in a distance where he can’t hear shit anymore.

Lance shakes his head and smiles down at the books he was supposed to put back in their places ten minutes.

Out of nowhere an arms falls on his shoulder.

“Hi Lance.”

Lance yelps, heart going up in his throat, but then he ridiculously feels as if it goes up just so it can fall down in his stomach. He whirls around, ready to curse at whoever dared to touch him and scare him like this, but stops in a record time when a familiar smirking face greets him back.

_Keith. It’s just Keith_, his brain reminds him, but then panic latches back on like leech.  
_Oh, God it’s Keith._

It is, once again, beyond Lance’s range of thought of how can someone be so bewitching and captivating the way Keith is.

His black hair is in a tiny bun at the top of his head and the Cuban boy is realizing again how much potential his mullet has. His bangs are still out, but there are still some long strands that frame his sides, but in a way that they don’t hide his black studs, that he’s decided to put on for the day. He’s in his typical trademark skinny jeans that are way too _tight _(and dark blue, damn Keith is experimenting) – and nope Lance isn’t complaining _at all_. And despite the fact that outside is hot as hell and Lance can’t breathe, he still has the stupid black leather jacket on that just makes him look cooler instead of stupid.

Keith snaps his fingers in front of his face and Lance goes back into reality.

“Did you get lost Loverboy?” He laughs and his mouth stretches in a beautiful way that Lance can’t help, but lean in a bit, itching to get closer to the one he wants so badly to gather him in his arms and kiss breathlessly against the book shelf.

_In your eyes_, Lance thinks, but on outside he rolls his eyes, like it’ll stop the wild gallop in his chest.

“I was just thinking if you’re a clone, because there’s no way the real Keith would choose another color besides black for his jeans,” Lance says and makes his point by looking at Keith’s legs up and down, giving the black haired and himself an excuse to check his best friend out.

Keith huffs and kicks his shoe playfully with his foot, “Adam bought them last week for Shiro from this one site, but they got the size wrong so I was doomed to bring some color into my wardrobe.”

“A tragedy, but I still think you’ll bring some boys to the yard with these,” Lance claims and grins at the way Keith snorts cutely against his fist.

That’s such a bad habit in Lance’s opinion. Keith always hides the beautiful gems called smiles behind a hand whenever he can and the small dimple on his cheek, preventing Lance from witnessing the lovely way his face changes when a true, genuine bright look blooms on his face like the first snowdrop, announcing the spring after a long winter.

“What are you doing here though? Don’t you have kickboxing training today?” He throws another look at Rachel who is still talking to the boy on the phone and leaves her alone as he makes a motion with his head for Keith to follow him.

“Emma cancelled, her son is down with something,” Keith says behind him, “I decided to look through some animal references in some child and bio books for my final project in Coran’s class. And if you want to, we can hang out for some coffee after you end here.”

Lance heads towards the Math section, since the first three books are some workbooks for freshmen. Surprisingly, the work in the library is actually super chill and Lance whole heartedly prefers it over cleaning the dirty toilets and taking off dry old gums from places where he didn’t even know before it was possible to put. Plus the librarian, Mr. Marchesi is a super nice guy that sometimes lets him leave earlier if there isn’t too much work to do. Lance doesn’t do it often unless he has a basket training he doesn’t want to miss, but most of the time Mr. Marchesi has interesting stories and book recommendations that always match Lance’s taste so the Cuban boy doesn’t really mind.

“Sure, I finish in thirty or so,” he quickly puts the workbooks in their places and looks down to surprisingly find a National Geographic magazine. He offers it to Keith who tilts his head as he takes it. He flips through some of the pages quickly and stops on one that has orange and brown colors. Keith hums.

“This might work, there are some sick pictures of lions,” he mumbles for Lance’s ears, but all of a sudden a big smile stretches over his face when he skims through another page, “oh my god, Lance look!”

He turns the magazine at Lance’s face and he’s confused for just a second before he notices the picture of a lake and two hippos with a small one next to them drinking from the water. He glances at Keith’s eyes who glisten with pure excitement and love towards his favorite animal. When he found out about this simple fact about his best friend he gushed over how adorable it is, but when Keith played him a documentary of them he instantly changed his mind that hippos are only just fat, big, cute creatures. 

“They look so cute!” Keith brings back the magazine back to look at the picture and his smile softens in time with Lance’s heart that fills with so much happiness and love at the sight of his best friend smiling at just some pictures of his favorite animal. Keith always managed to appreciate the little things in his life no matter how significant they are.

His fingers itch with temptation to reach out and touch his hair. To hold his face and kiss his smile and feel it against his lips.

“Lance!” Rachel calls out and Lance immediately turns to shush at her to be quiet. _Goddamn why are they so loud?!_

Keith who had his nose buried in the magazine snaps his head towards Rachel and grins at the sight of his twin who in return smiles like she’s a kid visiting Disneyland for the first time. She skips over and embraces Keith around his waist who hugs her back just as tight.

“Hey handsome, how’ve you been?” Rachel asks and steps back, her phone clutched in her hand and Lance sees her screen wallpaper which is a polaroid picture of Rachel and Lance on their eighteenth birthday last year, surrounded by their family where they celebrated at a local restaurant. There’s Sylvio perched on Rachel’s shoulders and Nadia in Lance’s lap who has cake cream on his nose from when his niece decided it’d be a great idea, because : “_good photo, tio c’mon_”. Lance has a copy of said picture in his wallet and millions of others like these on his corkboard that’s stuck on the wall next to his bed.

Keith ducks his head at the compliment, but bumps his fist against hers in a greeting only they do, because as Rachel once said “_it’s the code for the conspiracy club, something you aren’t a part of, Lance_”. It’s literally a bump fist, but whatever.

“I’m good, finals are coming up and my acceptance exam for Altea is in two days so I’m pretty nervous for that.”

“You should come and celebrate when you finish it!” Rachel exclaims excitingly, “It’s in Friday so you can stop by and have dinner with us! Right Lance? I’m sure mom wouldn’t mind _at all_.”

They both turn their heads towards him and Rachel literally begs with her eyes, as if Lance is capable to refuse to spend time with the boy he’s crazy in love with. He knows Keith will think he’s imposing which is utter bullshit since he is apparently blind to the fact that the Ramirez family as a whole completely adores him. Even after these years, Lance still is amazed how the black haired can’t see the amount of love is receiving from so many people, but yet he doesn’t care. Because Lance will always be there to remind him he’s loved, important and priceless.

“Mama definitely wouldn’t mind at all,” Lance snickers, “in fact I think she’ll be disappointed if you don’t come.”

Rachel brings a fist in victory, but then looks down at the time on her phone.

“Sorry boys, I gotta go to the mall, searching for the dress of my dreams!”

She hugs Keith once again and then clutches Lance in her arms tightly, most likely still a bit affected from their conversation earlier. He fiddles with her curls, but just when she pulls away Lance stops her so he can whisper in her ear.

“Have fun with Will, sis.”

He pulls off his best eat-shitting grin he can muster and meets her wide eyes and reddened cheeks. She flicks him on the forehead before he can say something more and laughs at his expression of annoyance. “Don’t worry, I was gon’ tell you today anyways.”

“You better,” Lance says bitterly, although there is absolutely no malice traceable in his voice. Rachel can tell him whenever she’s ready and whenever she wants. After all, he’s the one to talk. He’s been thinking to come out for weeks now to his family and friends, because as Rachel said, they won’t see each other for a really long time. And even if Lance’s heart breaks at the distance that there will be between them, at least he wants his twin to know the truth about him.

Rachel waves at them, while walking backwards, dancing like an idiot, but then bumps ironically into Ina who walks by, earphones plugged into her ears. Keith and Lance crack up at the way Rachel looks back horrified, apologizing to the tall girl who only gives her a stink eye before she continues on her way. Rachel rolls her eyes and sticks out her tongue at Ina’s back, Lance assumes. She waves once again and then leaves their sight.

“I think Ina doesn’t like me and Rachel much,” Lance voices his suspicions to the boy next to him, “I’ve seen Veronica hanging out with Rizavi and her so she likes at least one of us.”

Keith snorts next to him. “She doesn’t like _you_ specifically. And Rachel is literally your female version, just as you are the male version of her. She’s ought to dislike you both.”

“Have you talked to her if you know that?” The Cuban boy wonders and travels to the next section with Business books as the ones that haven’t been put on its place are next after the magazine he gave to Keith.

They walk towards the center where there are tables occupied with all kinds of students. Some of them talk quietly, their notebooks, study cards and phones forgotten in front of them; some are the opposite – their heads hang low as they read or highlight sentences; some are accidently asleep on a friend’s shoulder or alone; some are working on their laptops, the sound of their fingers tapping softly on the keyboard ringing softly in the mostly quiet room. Mr. Marchesi’s desk is full of books and papers and all kind of devices, but the old man is simply banging his head up and down, wireless pods in his ears. He once said to Lance that he’s not broke anymore, because he finally has these ‘lil boys’. Lance still tries to figure out what the hell he meant.

“The Bio section is-“ Lance begins to inform Keith, but the boy is already on the right path to said place he wants to go. He shakes his head fondly and finally makes his way towards his destination – AKA the business & economics section.

He starts putting all the writings on their respectable places, ignoring the whispers of some students nearby whom he cannot see.

_“The Laws of Success” is here on shelf C, “Capitalistic World – How To Survive” is hereee on shelf E, “The Guide to Your First Business” is, yup, shelf A right next to the books for Law and Justice…_

He thinks to himself if he should get one for Veronica. His younger sister has wanted to become a lawyer or a prosecutor in the near future, ever since she stepped into this high school.

Luis is a mechanic in one of the best service shops in the city and despite his short career as a fitness instructor while they were living in Cuba, Lance knows that he loves his job greatly. Lisa studied for a hairdresser before they travelled here to the States, so after Nadia and Sylvio were old enough she finally continued her dream and graduated. Now she works at a salon near Kral Zera and one of the make-up artists there became one of her best friends.

Marco never seemed to want to study in the medicine area, although when he announced he wanted to, no one in the family was actually surprised. Marco has a kind, but protective personality, his heart literally is made of gold and the goodness basically radiates from him. So being a nurse really suited Marco in a way Lance never thought about. Only their mother was confused on why he would go all the way to Brazil to study, when he admitted that he will come back to work here, but his brother’s only answer was that he ‘_wanted a challenge_’.

Veronica, however, just like Lance always knew what she wanted. Ever since she was a kid she was always “right”, always knew what to say, how to properly defend herself whenever she did something bad and instead of watching the animations Lance and Rachel watched, she preferred to watch criminal TV shows instead. Of course, their mom didn’t allow her right away, but the moment Veronica turned twelve she begged Lance to download her all the crime drama shows he could find. Lance gladly did it and even watched some with her, but eventually got a bit bored, but that fortunately didn’t faze his little sister. Older and on her way to junior year she is already self-assured and in full control on what her desires are.

Just when he picks a book with the title “_Law and Justice__ :__ the World_” that catches his eye, the whispers from before become into sudden giggles and finally become detectable to him.

“Michael! How could you say that!?” That’s the voice of a girl, definitely one younger than him.

“Oh shut up! Actin’ like you weren’t drooling over Fray yesterday like a thirsty person who sees water for the first time in days!” _Now that must be the Michael that shouldn’t say inappropriate things in a library_, Lance thinks amusingly. He makes his way towards the rest of the collected books, giving the students privacy to talk about whatever they want.

Unfortunately for them, but fortunately for Lance, all the left books in his pile seem to be all ones about law and philosophy so he’s definitely not leaving that section soon.

“For the record, Chloe and Fray hardly talk anymore so I don’t think she was drooling for _him_ specifically,” another feminine voice calls out, teasing the supposed Chloe girl. Lance raises his eyebrows, already distractingly getting invested into some drama that he will barely remember in a day. It’s not like he’s going to tell anyone or if he knows these people. Hell, he’s going away in a month anyways.

“Lifen, you better watch your mouth or I’ll tell your brother you’re still using his Netflix account,” The girl named Chloe voices in a louder tone, but thankfully someone scolds her on it before Lance has to intervene.

“Okay, okay no more threats against each other. We finally got to the goods anyways,” yet another girl pipes in, a slight accent trackable in her voice, but Lance for the life of him can’t dig in from where she must be. He can’t see shit too since he’s on the other side of the shelf.

“Someone is thirstyyy,” a new boyish voice joins into the conversation and Lance stiffens a laugh since their dynamic reminds him so much of his own friend group.

There’s a slight thump that suggest the boy who teased the girl with the accent got hit and giggles and laughs erupt quietly around their table for a second time. Lance continues to put books slower than he usually does and he knows he should feel bad for eavesdropping their conversation, but he feels strangely intrigued by their jokes and personalities.

“For real though, Svetlana is right – we just got to the best part,” and another boy voice, but this one is definitely deeper than Michael’s and the boy who teased the girl with the accent – who must be Svetlana. Sounds like a name that originates from eastern Europe if Lance is going to bet money on this. The boy with the deeper voice claps his hands which causes the group to giggle again.

“Fine, so we were on juniors and now…,” the girl named Lifen makes a dramatic pause that even makes Lance sharpen his ears to hear her better, and damn, he has turned into a grandma, “_who’s the hottest senior in the school._”

Lance almost laughs out loud at these words, but quickly catches himself and puts a fist over his mouth, trying to mute his snickering. Jesus, these kids literally are in the library discussing who are the hottest students from every grade? Sounds like something Lance would do back in freshmen year uninhibitedly. His shallow side, however, is dying to hear if he’s in the list, though he doubts that since there are tons of seniors who are way more attractive. Not that he’s degrading himself, but at least he’s being honest with himself.

He’s not done with his work, but leans on the shelf, ready to soak in all the juicy information his ears will receive.

“Damn, all the seniors are gorgeous, if I’m being honest. There are some juniors who are better, but the seniors in this year definitely are the most attractive,” Svetlana declares and Lance feels a strange pride surging through him in the fact that these sophomores (_Lance assumes they’re sophomores, freshmen usually don’t pay much attention to the older ones in the first year_), “something went down in 2036 and I want to find out what, if the majority look like that. Must be black magic.”

“I wanna know how Lotor’s parents look like if he has a face like this,” Lifen says and Lance throws his head back in silent chuckling. He’s so _not_ telling this to his teammate since it’d be a violation of these kid’s privacy, but it’s amusing to know what their younger students truly think of them.

“Dude can we just talk about the fact how everyone from the whole basketball team look like models?” Chloe says, humor laced in her voice.

Suddenly, Michael and the boy who teased Svetlana call out a name at the same time.

“Ryan Kinkade!”

The table evolves into laughs and Lance shakes head, totally agreeing with their opinions so far. It’s no surprise to Lance that they think Lotor and Ryan are ridiculously attractive and have the faces of Gods. If Lance is being honest with himself, he might’ve had a bit of a crush on Ryan when he was their age. And of course, in typical little Lance fashion he didn’t realize he wasn’t jealous of Ryan because of all the attention he received, but rather crushing on him. What a dumbass.

Surprisingly Keith emerges at the end of the tiny “corridor” between the shelves and when Lance tracks the way his mouth opens up, ready to whisper-yell out his name, the brunette puts a finger in front of his lips, signalizing to his best friend to keep quiet. Keith furrows his eyebrows, but keeps his mouth shut. Quiet as a cat, the shorter boy appears next to his side and is clearly trying to understand what is happening. Lance simply points towards the shelf, that acts like a wall between them and the sophomores (or the juniors, Lance still doesn’t know), who are all gushing over Ryan’s looks rightfully so.

“Matt Holt is such a cutie though, I don’t get why people don’t date him as much – if I was one year older I so would try to win his heart,” Lifen whines dramatically and Lance has the feeling she’s slumping in her seat, complaining like a kid. He turns to Keith to see his reaction who has his right brow slightly lifted and a small grin. He looks at Lance as if he’s asking “_Seriously?_” and the Cuban boy simply shrugs in answer.

“Wait, wait y’all forgot the best woman from the seniors,” Deep Voice says.

“Sekani, you think everyone in this goddamn school is the best, I feel like someone will smile at you and bam - you’re in love,” Chloe replies and Deep Voice, whose name is Sekani apparently, lets out an offended ‘_hey!_’.

“The best woman from the seniors is obviously Acxa Lewis,” Svetlana scoffs as if it’s clearer than a spring day that Acxa is the best. This time Keith snorts next to him and Lance is reminded that Keith is actually friends with her. The quiet girl usually hangs out with Lotor’s group or alone, so Lance was baffled when one time their group went out one night and Acxa saw Keith from the distance and came up to greet him. She barely paid them any attention, but stroke a conversation with the black haired as if they’re some parents, casually seeing each other after years in the supermarket.

“Acxa is charming, but we all know that Allura Altea is an angel in a human’s body sent down from the heavens on here by Jesus Christ himself so all of us peasants can witness her beauty,” Sekani declares like a priest and Lance doubles in laughter along with Keith whose shoulders are slightly shaking. He doesn’t understand why this is so hilarious to him, but maybe it’s from the fact that they discuss his friends as if they’re celebrities or something. Allura for the first time in a while joined them in their usual Saturday night hangout last week and Lance was happy to see her smiling and joking, even with him. There was a small visible distance Lance felt she put between them, but he didn’t care. He’s ready to give her all the time she needs.

“I’m still in awe of how beautiful her hair looks. Her braids and twists are always on point. If _I_ color mine white my mom will murder me,” Chloe mutters in horror.

“She’s a great dancer, have you seen her in Naomi KK’s videos when she visits the dance studios here? _Absolutely sick_.”

“I swear, if I bring someone like her at home, my sister will probably ask them if they’re sick if I’m dating someone below my level,” Sekani laughs and damn, that hit too close to home for Lance. Not in a bad way, but the jokes were endless when he brought Allura for dinner at his house.

“Okay so, Ryan Kinkade, Lotor, Matt Holt, Acxa and Allura are the hottest seniors, yeah?” Teasing boy asks and in answer the whole table turns silent. “What?” He asks defensively.

“Akamu are you stupid? We forgot so many people like, uhh… like Nyma Michaels, Zethrid B, Nadia Rizavi, Zara Jackson, Jamal Hornsby and of course the love of my life – _Lance Ramirez_.”

“Oh my GOD, I can’t believe we almost forgot Chloe’s and everyone’s literal crush in this fucking school!” Michael cries out and _what the fuck?_

“Lance Ramirez is the only one in the school who is ‘perfect boyfriend material’ – I just feel it. I _know_ my parents will love him more than me, if I introduce him to them,” Sekani states and Lance mouths ‘_what_’ to his best friend who looks like he’s having too much trouble in keeping it down.

“I once talked to him up close and personal. Last year, when I forgot where the bathroom is and he asked me if I need help. Such _blue_ guys, these eyes should be illegal I’m telling you,” Svetlana sighs out dreamily and Lance feels his cheeks and ears reddening in embarrassment. Cockiness and confidence long forgotten behind him. Keith manically grabs his bicep and starts shaking it in silent laughter.

“Not to sound creepy, but when he and Allura broke up, for a second I thought ‘_I can finally shoot my shot_’ and on the next second I realized he’s straight and graduating this year,” Akamu, the teasing boy, mumbles with humor and all of his friends laugh quietly.

“Man, I was shocked when they broke up – they were like that power couple in them cliché movies our parents watched as teens,” Sekani comments and Lance mumbles a tiny ‘_oh my_’ under his nose as he puts his head in his hand.

Keith next to him is losing it, while Lance is in complete shock. He stands there, mouth open, surprised that these students think that he’s _that_ desired. Sure, he knows he’s considered popular, but definitely overshadowed by his teammates and other countless cooler people than him. To suddenly hear random youngsters calling him the ‘love of his life’, talk about his eyes and his relationship with Allura is kind of unreal to him.

Keith continues laughing, eyes shut in pure joy and Lance non-surprisingly forgets immediately everything else and focuses on the enchanting sight that Keith is unconsciously giving him. And because Lance is stupid and can’t control himself, he brings up a hand and brushes a lock out of Keith’s face. His cheeks are red, the toothy smile proudly on the front and his cute little dimple stares back at him. And because Lance is even _stupider_ than he thought he was, he doesn’t let go but does the opposite. He cups Keith’s left cheek with his right hand and watches with fascination, when the black haired catches it and just holds it next to his face like it’s something natural; a reflex.

It’s a picture he’s imagined hundreds of times. Not the place or how he does it and when, but just… holding the face that belongs to the love of his life, who laughs and keeps laughing not caring who sees or hears; exists purely in their tiny bubble that’s made of love.

Something soft, fuzzy and warm travels across his chest and settles deep into the core of his heart, butterflies flying inside and outside, enveloping him in all kinds of colors and smells as he realizes nothing else matters, except Keith. _Keith_. _Akira_. The only one Lance will ever want and love in a way he’ll never love someone else.

Just on time, it seems at last Keith registers the position they’re in. His pale hands, the delicate, but rough hands of an artist, clutching tightly to Lance’s own who are so warm in contradiction with his cold ones. His eyes that hold every possible color of all the galaxies in the universe look back at him in disbelief and amazement. Then they start tracing his face like Lance is a map to a treasure; a painting he’s observing, securing every detail into his brain, not blinking and Lance foolishly hopes it’s because he doesn’t want to miss anything – just like how he himself is afraid if he closes his eyes and opens them again, he’ll find out that he’s imagining all of this.

And Lance?

_Lance is sick and tired of only imagining._

Keith is leaning up his head slightly towards him, eyelashes fluttering like wings, and Lance slowly starts to close his eyes. He doesn’t know what’s happening, doesn’t have the time to think through where this is going, but a big part of him simply doesn’t care. He smears his thumb across Keith’s scar, longing to kiss it over and over.

They lean closer and closer, until there are barely any inches left between them; Lance’s heart is going to burst out of chest and explode, heartbeat in his ears, as he’s shaking like a leaf during a windy autumn day. Lance automatically licks his lips in preparation and his brain is yet to process that he’s going to kiss Keith and said Keith isn’t stopping him at all, but does the opposite. He looks like he wants to kiss Lance just as much.

_“Lance…”_ Keith whispers so, _so_ damn quietly and for a second he thinks his ears must play tricks on him, but no, the sound of Keith saying his name like a prayer in the night sends shivers down his spine and goosebumps start to rise on his skin.

The moment their lips almost touch; just when Lance is on the verge of tasting Keith on his tongue after restraining himself for so long _not_ to think about the stolen kisses they’ve shared-

_THUMP_

The sound of what it sounds like books, notebooks and other stuff falling, and a following laughter, startles them both so much, like someone just came easily and without any care destroyed the careful barrier they’ve put around themselves and the real world. Keith steps back so quickly and sudden that he hits the back of his head on the edge on one of the shelves. He lets out a painful groan and automatically reaches back with a hand to hold on to the place where he hurt.

Lance unthinkingly reaches towards his best friend to help, but on time realizes it might not be the best idea right now. _What the fuck was he thinking?_

Trying to kiss Keith out of nowhere, just because he felt like it and Keith seemed into it. It was a public space where anyone could’ve see them. And _no_, not because he’s ashamed of Keith or something foolish like that, but the coming out on his own is a priority and he’d hate, if some random person catches him and sings it to the whole school, before Lance has the chance to do it and tell to his friends and family first. Not to mention, that Keith hates even the bare minimum of attention he receives from people whom he doesn’t know or met and to be the talk of the following month is going to be a pure nightmare for him.

Lance internally punches himself. He surely should’ve been more careful.

The group of friends however all cackle and laugh obviously oblivious, in a way as if they mock the way he missed a chance to kiss Keith.

“That was an epic fall!”

_Yup_, Lance couldn’t have said it better.

“Oh my _God_, Svetlana, are you okay?”

“Yeah, yeah I just swung with too much force backwards and I thought if I catch onto my books it’ll prevent me from falling, hah,” the girl giggles and the rest of her friends follow as they mutter and mumble about how clumsy she is.

Meanwhile Lance tunes them out and looks at Keith, who’s rubbing the spot where he bumped, eyes closed as he has leaned next to the wooden vertical plank that departs the Law and Economic books. His long eyelashes repose on his slightly reddened cheeks and as much as Lance wants to try whatever ideas he’s having now – this time he keeps his hands to himself. He scratches his chin in nervousness, trying to think of something to say. Should he joke? Or be casual about it?

_‘Ahahaha it’s all good dude, I actually don’t wanna kiss you there was just a mosquito on your face that I was intent on killing … with my lips.’_

He cringes at himself and glances down at his feet, aimlessly checking out his shoes.

Keith clears his throat and when Lance snaps his head up at him, he sadly sees that the boy is with open eyes, but doesn’t dare to meet his gaze at all. Lance notices how with obvious disinterest he reads one of titles from some books and Lance has the urge to tear out his hair in frustration. It seems to him that the same shit happens every single time; a never ending déjà vu with how they try to run away, but find out the path was always a circle. One time they’re okay and everything is great, until someone does or says something and they start acting like strangers, afraid of each other.

“In conclusion – the basketball team are all Hollywood actors and actresses in disguise,” Sekani finishes and there are hums of agreement around the table, until someone snorts like this is ridiculous.

“I don’t recall Keith Kogane being in the basketball team though,” Michael says smugly and Lance gets a whiplash for just a few seconds until he gapes his mouth and turns to Keith whose eyebrows have disappeared way up behind his black bangs. His fair skin is a perfect giveaway for what Keith is feeling so it’s incredibly endearing how Keith’s cheeks are still dusted in an embarrassed red.

“The only time in my life when I’d wish to be a guy,” Lifen says with a snort, “is only so I can go on a date with him. Legit one of the most gorgeous people I’ve ever seen.”

“Yeah, I feel guilty for looking at him sometimes – I feel like I should pay money or something,” Akamu replies and _oh ho ho_? Now it’s Lance’s time to laugh like a psycho. He tries not to make any sounds that can give away his position so he puts the top of his hand against his mouth, muffling everything.

“Okay true, if there is one person in this school that would win Miss Universe Male version it’s definitely him,” states Sekani and everyone mutters words of confirmation, “he looks kind of picky though. Griffin is also not that bad, if I’m being honest so I don’t get why he broke up with him.”

Lance feels tears gathering in his eyes at the irony of the situation and tries not to crumble on the ground when he sees Keith’s mouth opening in pure offense at the implication he’s shallow or superficial.

He notices too late that Keith has gotten closer to his side who mutters only loud enough to Lance to hear, “I can’t believe these fifteen year olds discuss me _and_ my love life, fucking unbelievable…”

“That’s because you’re too high standing in their low commoner eyes, your majesty,” Lance mumbles with a fake snobbish accent as he bends his torso in a cheap approximation of a bow.

Keith punches him playfully in the belly, but Lance is too busy laughing like these “gossips” are the funniest shit he’s heard in years. There’s a small smirk dancing faintly on Keith’s mouth and just in a matter of seconds – the moment they shared disappears and turns into light smoke flown away by the wind, forgotten and tucked away in a box that only keeps away moments like these, but never opens up again so they stay in secret.

“Shut up or I’ll get lost in these illegal eyes of yours, Lance you love of my life,” Keith fires back, ludicrously imitating Svetlana from earlier. And nope, it doesn’t have any effect on Lance no matter how stupid he sounds.

Nope. Not at all.

Despite that, they keep laughing, leaning on each other and Lance wants to stay like that forever even when he knows this is going to be over soon. He wants to film this moment, to bottle up the emotional hurricane swirling in his chest right now. Unnecessarily he wraps a hand around Keith’s waist, faking it like he needs support when in reality he just wishes the space between them to melt away completely.

At the end, there’s only chuckles and huffs left. The sophomores change topics almost immediately, but this time he doesn’t really care what they say. They both sigh magically at the same time and Keith, with some stiff hesitation, puts his head on his shoulder. It’s a totally a normal position for them, because Lance has always been a touchy person and some part of him knew that Keith really appreciated the fact that occasionally he was the one who initiated the touching. Of course, Keith has had his own awkward adorable moments where he’d be the one to go for it first and Lance is proud to say that Keith isn’t touch-starved anymore with all the affection he’s receiving from everyone around him.

Lance innocently bumps his nose into Keith’s soft hair and _shit_, it smells like watermelon?

“Have you used a new shampoo or something?” Lance curiously asks and doesn’t dare to look down at Keith’s reaction.

Keith hums in response. “Those stuff you’re always recommending are too expensive. It was on sale – buy two small shampoos get one shower gel for free. Lance, I couldn’t let this opportunity go.”

His tone is serious as if he’s talking about war strategy rather than cosmetic products and it brings out a tiny huff of laughter out of him. When Keith let himself be as dorky as Lance and joke around like he needed to loose himself a bit from time to time always made Lance happy. He looks at Keith’s hair that looks incredibly shiny and clicks his tongue.

“You’re a lucky son of a bitch if you can use the shitty shampoos from the supermarket and still manage to have hair like this.”

“Good genes I guess,” Keith grins against his shoulder and Lance humorously pinches his waist. Keith jumps away from him in surprise. He looks behind Lance and then a glance behind him. Lance is about to ask him for what he’s looking at, but Keith beats him to it.

“What time is it? You said you end soon, right?”

Lance throws a quick peek at the big clock that’s hung high on the wall and nods to himself and Keith.

“In ten minutes. Did you pick up some cool bio books?”

“Yup, they’re at the librarian’s desk I only came to check on you, since you were taking so long. Which was a mistake I guess, if you’re so thirsty for attention from your ‘fans’, ” Keith says cackling and Lance is quick on the defense.

For a brief moment Lance panics that said fans heard their conversation, but luckily Lance can still hear them talking, just a lot quieter than before. He shakes his head and puts the last four books on their respectable places and turns at his friend who’s trying to fix without any mirror some of his hair that somehow looks really messy now that Lance really looks at it.

A lot of people, including his friends, wrongly think Keith doesn’t care about his appearance and just winged it every time he had to go out. And while a big proportion of that is true – there was also a small part in Keith that took pride that people find him attractive. He’s not a cocky shit like Lance and definitely hasn’t boosted out loud to everyone who’s willing to listen about how attractive is, but there were simple manners that gave it away if you were willing to pay too much attention as Lance did to Keith.

If Keith was touching his hair too much it meant that he was anxious about how it looked. On the rare occasions, when he puts eyeliner he spends a lot of checking himself on his phone’s screen if it still looks perfect enough for his opinion. A tiny stain on his clothes, that nobody would see, was an annoying thorn prickling Keith’s eyes; how he actually keeps these stupid gloves not only because he thinks they’re cool, but because they keep his hands soft after he has put cream on them.

Of course, almost all people cared to a certain degree how they presented themselves in front of society’s eyes, but to witness Keith secretly caring about his looks more than he let on, was certainly interesting and amusing to watch.

He pushes Keith towards the exit of this “golden corridor” and rolls his eyes. They have to maneuver between all the tables and chairs so they can get to Mr. Marchesi’s desk. The man seems to be signing in Keith’s books and magazines in the data base while putting in the due dates for when he has to return them.

When Keith brings a hand to see if his bun still is there, staying on its place Lance finally dares to speak up from behind him.

“You look fine, Mr. Universe Male version don’t worry.”

And even when this is a library and they should keep quiet in the sake of all the students who specifically have come here to study in peace – Keith lets out a really loud laugh. He immediately receives dirty looks and shushing from all sides and Lance can’t help, but join in too. (Definitely quieter, of course.)

Keith throws a look behind his shoulder, smile sealed on the lips that Lance almost kissed _holy shit._

“You’re ridiculous,” the black haired says, but there’s something fondly curling with his voice. The mischievous twinkle in his eyes sparkles with such light and Lance can’t breathe. The beauty he possessed is definitely something Keith has to be paid for, he thinks. Keith looks at him way longer than Lance expects, but he doesn’t avert his gaze away. There is also another _thing_ in there. Something that Lance maybe is ready to open and explore; something he wants to _experience_.

_Yes_, Lance seems to finally admit for the first time in years, _I’m definitely sick and tired of the imaginations._

*:･ ﾟ ✧ * :･ ﾟ✧ .:* ・° ☆. 。.:*

Keith spits in the sink, humming gently to the rhythm of the song that’s playing from his small speaker perched on the stand at the base of the mirror. He brings his head back up and the reflection of his face stares back at him. He looks as tired as he feels, but not in the bad way. Today was a tiring day, after all, he had his Altea acceptance exam and despite the fact that it happened hours ago, his body still tingles with excitement and quiet contentment buzzing over.

He continues brushing his teeth, eyes slightly closed. He can’t wait to bury himself in his bed, with all the soft pillows surrounding him and the warmth of Kosmo, when Keith decides unconsciously in his sleep they can cuddle. The humming doesn’t stop, even when the song from his “calm” playlist changes.

Keith can’t help but feel annoyed at the dirty mirror, stained with dried water and spots from God knows what. Keith, along with Shiro and Adam, clean up the whole house every Sunday, but maybe he’ll make an exception for tomorrow, because goddamn does his room needs to be properly cleaned. He’s a tidy person by nature, he guesses, memories from the orphanage when ever since then he still wanted everything to be put on its place. He was the only one who tidied his own bed, who always put his toys back and art supplies whenever he played or drew. He knew the workers there appreciated it, judging by their warm and grateful smiles – which motivated Keith even more.

That good habit didn’t change thankfully, when his brother and Adam took him in – in fact Keith felt pressured at the beginning to be even cleaner, just in case they were having doubts about his presence in their house. When he realized that they didn’t care as much as he thought, he allowed himself to be messy of certain stuff such as not cleaning his hands properly after he drew; or where he threw his backpack and shoes; or if he left some dishes uncleaned in the sink. Keith still kept his room in perfect shape and always made sure it was clean.

Regardless of that, the past week his head has been in the clouds unusually too long for him. He’s grateful it’s Friday, because at least he can sleep in later tomorrow after he made sure Shiro will take out Kosmo instead of him. He’ll miss his usual meet with Michelle, but he’s sure she’d understand.

He leans down and rinses his mouth with water. Finishes with the teeth and puts his toothbrush on its place as he goes down again to wash his face. The cold water wakes him (more than he’d like), but it’s the least he could do to honor Lance’s skin care routine.

_“Please, just tell me at least you wash your face, Keith please don’t betray me.”_

_“Of course I do, for what kind of heathen do you take me for-“_

He huffs a laugh in his palms and presses the button next to the sink so he can stop the water. He dries his face in the red towel and the smell of fresh laundry fills his nose. Shiro must’ve changed them when he came back from work.

Keith also dries his hands so he can turn off the lights from the touch pad.

“Stop the music,” he says to the speaker and after a small computer-ish noise, the music comes to an ends mid-way as he exists the small bathroom in his room. He strolls towards his bed, where Kosmo has already fallen asleep and Keith tries to be as quiet as possible in favor of not waking up his dog.

He grabs a hair tie from the small white drawer next to his bed and gathers his hair in a high ponytail. Afterwards he picks up a small pin and sticks his bangs on the top of his head. He doesn’t bother with checking his phone, but only turns it on so he can see what hour it is.

12 : 14 AM

The sudden bright light from his phone pains his eyes and he is quick to turn off the device. Perfect time for finally to fall asleep. After his exam, he sadly had to turn down the offer Rachel proposed to him two days ago about having a dinner with the Ramirez, but sadly he was one of the few who stayed too late so they could finish their drawings. Summer is already around the corner and it wasn’t as dark, when the exam was officially over, but he was emotionally and physically drained so he just texted Lance to apologize on his behalf.

When he came home he was greeted with Shiro’s supportive hug, that lasted around a minute along with some tears of pride. Keith wasn’t ashamed his own eyes got a bit misty, when his brother claimed he was proud of him and how far he’s come. Adam also hugged him like there’s no tomorrow, tightly and lovingly in his own way, and kept telling Keith he loved him.

Afterwards they ordered pizza as they asked around about the exam and what he drew. They watched some old movie, snuggled on the couch with Keith sandwiched between them, but when his eyes started dropping heavy with sleep on the first hour, the couple demanded he should go and sleep. They themselves also said good night (with some last hugs and forehead kisses) and made him go to bed.

He stayed up for another hour, answering all the supportive and cute messages from his friends and even some from his classmates he shared art classes with. There wasn’t anything from Lance, he sadly realized, but he didn’t let that fact bother him. He knows what a person his best friend is and he’ll probably come over tomorrow.. er- _today_ to greet him and hug him possibly. His body is already anticipating all the words, smiles and hugs he’ll receive.

He puts his phone down, muting it in case someone dares to wake him up before himself and finally gets to lay on his cool sheets under a small light blanket. Kosmo sadly wakes up due to the movement, but doesn’t change his relaxed position, only opens his eyes inspecting as Keith readjusts himself in a comfortable position. He settles for sleeping on his stomach and scoots closer to the huge animal, seeking warmth. Keith extends a hand and starts caressing the white fur. Almost immediately Kosmo closes his eyes, ears twitching and small cute snores fill the quiet room in a record time. Keith silently coos over the adorableness.

The moon shines so brightly it’s even visible through the black blinds, but the whiteness relaxes him in a way, along with the rhythmic motions of his hand that keeps stroking his dog.

A few minutes pass magically in which his whole body calms down, pressing further into his bed as his breathing decreases, eyes falling shut in slumber. His mind is still half awake at this point, but his hand stops whatever he’s doing while still staying on Kosmo’s back. Keith sighs in satisfaction and hums, sleep taking over him like a tidal wave.

_THUNK_

A small sound. Keith furrows his eyebrows slightly, paying it no mind. He buries his face even more in his big pillow, pulling the blanket tighter around himself like that will protect him from the noise outside.

_THUNK_

_THUNK_

_It must be the rain_, Keith thinks even when it doesn’t make any sense whatsoever, because today there wasn’t any cloud in the sky, sun shining aggressively down on everyone indicating that there won’t be any rain, no matter how much it’ll be appreciated in all this heavy, hot and wet weather. Rain doesn’t sound like that though.

_Perhaps a bird having diarrhea?_

Keith stills for a bit, waiting for another following annoying sound.

He counts the seconds, and when a minute passes and nothing happens, Keith sighs once again, as he releases the slight tension in his body.

_THUNK_

Okay, that’s it.

This time Keith opens his eyes and scowls at his window. What the _fuck_ is happening? If it’s some drunk asshole pranking him – they better start praying right now, because _boy_, did they decide to mess with the wrong person tonight. In result of his pure anger, a wave of energy strikes him and Keith gets up from his bed, tripping over his feet, hurrying to open his window and curse at whoever is trying to disturb him.

With more force than necessary, Keith yanks the window open and without knowing the person underneath, he throws a glare promising death. Before his eyes can adapt to the jet black darkness of the night, a voice speaks up.

“Oi! Finally! Keith, led down your mullet!”

Keith’s anger mixes with annoyance and even when _Lance_ of all people decided to act like some cliché out of a kid’s book aka the boy he’s madly in love with, he still interrupted Keith’s sleep and he’s not going to be exactly nice about it.

“Lance, what the fuck do you think you’re doing?!” He hisses at the boy below, who is wearing his black Voltron hoodie with a zipper, black hood on top of his head hiding his brown locks. Lance stares back at him and grins. He opens his hand, stretching it up as much as he can showing what he holds. Keith leans down and narrows his eyes when small rocks as little as candies greet him back.

“Are you fucking serious?” He deadpans.

“Not my fault you didn’t answer your phone,” Lance shrugs casually and throws the rocks back in the dirt from where he picked them from.

Keith leans his elbow on the base of the window and puts his head in his hand, tilting his head. He looks at Lance and gulps down at how awfully sexy he looks. His sweatpants hang low on his hips and the way he looks so mysterious in the night, coming up to throw fucking stones at his window just to get his attention. He sighs quietly and allows a small smile to creep over. What a dork.

“What do you want, Lance? In the middle of the night … when you should be _asleep_…” he trails off, emphasizing on the word ‘asleep’ and watches the way Lance grins and coolly puts his hands in his pockets. He fiddles with something in one of the pockets, Keith notices, but he instantly gets distracted at the way Lance tilts his head and some curls escape. He must’ve showered before he came here.

“Let me in,” Lance replies, not answering his question. He walks closer to the house like any minute a magical door will appear and will lead him inside.

“Are you stupid? What’s so important it can’t wait?” Lance keeps watching him with that lazy smirk, that might be setting Keith’s insides on fire, and somehow his blue eyes glow in the dark dangerously.

“I wanna…” he makes a pause and blinks slowly as if he can’t form a proper sentence, “show you something.”

Keith grips his window and looks behind him like Shiro will pop off any minute, demanding he goes back inside and shoos Lance like he’s some bad boy, coming here to steal him away to some party. He laughs inwardly at the thought. Kosmo is still laying in his bed, but his head is raised like he knows what’s going on, but refuses to participate. They have a staring contest for about ten seconds, until Kosmo blinks and yawns, laying back to sleep.

Keith turns back to Lance, but panic settles in when he doesn’t find him there anymore. His heartbeat increases and the worry comes in, when Keith looks left and right, leans lower over the joinery and still no sign of the Cuban boy. Just when he’s about to call out his name, a motion so low key; blink and miss it, happens. There he is, Lance standing in front of the entry door his finger almost touching the doorbell. Keith’s stomach swoops down to his feet.

“Lance! NO!” He yells way louder than acceptable and immediately puts a hand over his mouth. Lance thankfully snaps his head towards him and smiles like Keith is something… _something_. He doesn’t have word for it, okay?

“Just wait for me, okay? _Don’t_ _ring_,” he points threateningly at Lance who throws his hands in surrender, motion a bit sloppily as stupid as it sounds. Keith closes the window, because even though summer is approaching the midnight is still cold. He doesn’t want his room to be as icy as a popsicle when he comes back. Plus, even if Kosmo’s fur is thick he still doesn’t want him to be uncomfortable.

He darts towards his door, opening at, walking on his tip toes as he tries to be as quiet as possible, because he definitely doesn’t want to wake up the sleeping spouses. The terracotta floor tiles are freezing beneath his feet, but he does his best to not moan in pain. He gets down the stairs as quiet as a cat, skipping over some. Keith grabs a jacket that he can’t see to who it belongs to, but he doesn’t care. He slips it over himself, just for him not to be cold and finally comes face to face with the front door. He types the password, puts his handprint in the system and finally unlocks the lock.

Lance’s back greets him instead of his face and Keith doesn’t know if he should be disappointed or not.

“Lance?” He asks hesitantly. Lance turns around suddenly and before he can say or do something else, Keith immediately has arms full of a tall boy whose hands envelop around his waist.

His first reaction is to hug back, of course.

Ever since the beginning of their friendship, Lance was the only one who could magically turn every touch comfortable and welcomed on Keith’s part. He could put his head on Keith’s shoulder and he wouldn’t tense up; he would’ve thrown his hands on his shoulder and Keith would feel calmer than tenser; he would touch his face or touch his hair and Keith always wanted _more_. Four years have passed and nothing has changed – in fact it’s a miracle how Keith has lived without Lance’s affection at all.

Lance buries his head in Keith’s neck and Keith presses him even more, his arms around Lance’s neck tightening, wishing to give off more comfort to him than anything else. Cautiously he takes Lance’s hood down and all the curls bounce with it. And yes, his theory is proven right. The smell of Lance’s shampoo hits him right in the face and Keith would give his all just so he could be brave as Lance, brave enough to kiss his temple and his mouth, and cheeks, and jaw…

Instead he cards a hand through the curly hair, trying to untie all the knots in the way with his fingers, because it’s obvious he freshly showered as some parts are still wet and damp. His skin is warm as always even when Keith still shivers from his breath right against his neck.

Lance doesn’t cry and maybe that’s what scares Keith the most at the moment. If Lance isn’t crying, that means he’s probably bottling everything that is upsetting him. He does that a lot and it always saddens Keith to no end. Sometimes he’s afraid that Lance is never going to give his heart away to Keith completely. He might give it to someone else and he will be left with everything that Lance has only decided to share.

What a selfish thought.

Nevertheless he keeps holding Lance close to his neck, in his arms, in his heart. Lance will always be in his heart – that will never change at least. Keith hates changes anyways.

“You can cry, if you want,” Keith whispers closely to his ear and Lance only lifts his head, just to look straight at Keith.

His eyes are different. It’s the same blue that makes Keith’s knees week, but there is something that gives away that this Lance is a Lance he sees for the first time. Keith slips his hands away from his neck and he wills them to slide slowly. Lower and lower – down to where his heart is. The black haired swallows heavily and puts his palm over it. He doesn’t know why he did that, but it seems Lance doesn’t mind.

Lance’s heart is beating wildly, heartbeat pulsing so fast Keith has the feeling it’ll escape his chest any moment. It’s no different than his own. A bigger brown hand joins in and Keith sucks in a sharp breath, when Lance’s hand falls on top of his own and squeezes it so … _tenderly_. _Lovingly_. Keith doesn’t have enough words in his dictionary to describe how he feels at this moment. In the silence of the neighborhood, where Lance smells like apples and the ocean, but also of the fresh night air outside, like a new life. How his blue eyes stare so intensely at him, yet Keith doesn’t have the courage to look back.

How his touch is able to wake Keith up in a way no boy has ever succeeded.

Keith turns his hand so he can intertwine their fingers. And they fit so nicely, Keith has always marveled at the way. Whether it’d be their bodies, their fingers, their personalities … everything always fit to them both like a glove at the end.

Lance brings their hands together, _shyly_ as if he’s afraid Keith will pull away. He follows the path their hands go and tries to swallow down his gasp, when they reach Lance’s face and the boy plants a tiny kiss to his knuckles as if Keith is so precious and delicate and he’ll break, _as if the moment will break_, if he does it more firmly.

Keith tries to search the answers for all of his questions in Lance, but this look on his stunning features is so unknown, it makes him afraid in a way. Then Lance leans in and Keith is no far behind, their faces are as close as they were in that library, where Keith almost forgot what self-control means. Almost gave in to impulse to kiss, to touch just like they used to.

And then Lance whispers, “You’re so breathtaking.”

And the moment breaks.

Keith rips his hand out of Lance’s delicate grip and withdraws in an instant away, like Lance is fire with which he played too childishly, too recklessly and now he’s burning and it’s his own damn fault. Lance’s expression shatters and he takes a step towards him, only to be stopped by Keith clenched fist that collides with Lance’s front with a thud.

“You’re fucking drunk,” Keith spits out with so much malice and hurt in his voice that he even surprises himself with how harsh he sounds. Anger fuels inside him.

“Keith no-“ Lance goes for touching his hand, but Keith is quick to retreat and goes as far as pushing him away.

“Go home, Lance,” Keith says and his eyes are getting blurry with angry tears, or tears of heartbreak Keith still doesn’t know. He wants to go back in his room and drown his pillow in tears no one will be allowed to see. Keith is so tired of having his heart played with so many times like it’s a fucking ball and Lance is just doing tricks with it. Like it’s just a _game_ to him.

“Keith ‘m not drunk, believe me,” Lance tries to defend himself, when Keith turns away from him, reaching a hand to open the door. Keith whips faster than a lightning.

“I smelled the alcohol on your breath, don’t fucking lie to me you _moron_. I’m a lot of things, but I’m not stupid,” Keith growls.

Lance’s eyes widen with panic, when Keith whirls for the door again and watches the way his hands shake with fury, his blurred vision preventing him from properly reaching for the hand pad. Keith violently wipes some tears, that have started to traitorously fall down his cheeks. He grinds his teeth together, when Lance enters his line vision his body stopping him from opening the door, without touching him in any way.

“Keith, _please_ trust me. I’ve had some to drink, but I’m not drunk. Maybe a bit tipsy, but I’ve sobered enough if I’ve came all the way over to here, don’t you think?”

An opposing retort is on the tip of his tongue, when he realizes Lance may be… actually right. Keith clenches his hands again. He’s still mad that Lance woke him up from his sleep, demanded comfort and then called him breathtaking with alcohol in his veins like it’s something he does on the daily. He hates that he can’t tell Lance how he feels without ruining everything, without turning everything to a mess and destructing one of the most genuine relationships he has.

At the end, he closes his eyes, breathes in and out, waiting for the fire to be put out.

“What do you want, Lance?” Keith asks, and he tries to keep his tone neutral, like he doesn’t care; like it doesn’t matter, but at this point Keith’s lying to himself as his voice cracks when he says Lance’s name.

“My mom,” Keith sees him gulping and he looks away from him after he bores his eyes at Lance, “she gave me something weeks ago and told me to watch it with you.”

Keith raises his eyebrows in confusion, heartbeat still pounding in his ears after Lance’s comment. Why is it always so complicated when it comes to them? Why can’t Lance just let him suffer in peace with his broken heart? All these looks he’s been giving him and all the promised kisses broke him inside every time it happened; every time he thought about them. If Lance was trying to get him back to the arrangement that almost ruined their friendship, Keith wasn’t going to agree even if he was held at a gunpoint. Because if they repeat this thing he surely wouldn’t survive or be scathed at the end of it all.

“What is it?” Keith demands and tries not to sound too choked up.

Lance brushes his fingers through his curls and takes out the thing Keith saw him earlier fiddling with. He brings it up between them and shows a blue flash drive. Keith sees a taped paper with ‘070926’ written on it. There’s also a little heart. Keith takes it in his own hand carefully and inspects it closely.

“I don’t know what it’s inside, mom just told me we’d both like it if we watched together,” Lance supplies and Keith looks up at him once again. His eyes are beautiful and Keith feels he’ll suffocate in their blue, but yet he doesn’t want to look at anywhere else. Lance is like a magnet. Keith will always be drawn to look at him, to be closer no matter what.

“Why did you drink?” Keith finally dares to ask.

Lance sighs and starts fiddling with the zipper of his hoodie. “It seemed like a good idea two hours ago.”

“You didn’t text. Or call,” Keith whispers sadly, “you know today… _yesterday_ was important to me,” he finally allows himself to show how affected by Lance’s absence he was. It felt like there was a void inside him the whole time after he exited the school and there wasn’t anything received from Lance.

“N-no Keith, it’s not like that,” Lance quickly defends himself and Keith notices how he fumbles with his feet like he wants to step closer, but knows he shouldn’t, “I was going to come over and congratulate you by myself. I even bought you a present, because you deserve better than just a text or a call.”

Bit by bit the anger melts away from Keith and love is quick to replace it. It’s stupid. He knows he should’ve trusted Lance better, yet like the overt-thinker he is, thought that Lance simply didn’t care as much as Keith thought he did. But he’s wrong. Lance never stops caring even for a bit, because he’s that person that will always be there for you, supporting you and appreciating you. No matter how many arguments they’ve had over the years, Lance was always ready to bounce back with open arms and sweet words.

“Then why-“

“Abuela. She just…” Lance swallows and this time Keith dares to step closer, when he sees something obviously happened.

Guilt and shame stick to him like an annoying glue he can’t take off as he beats himself over how selfish he is once again. Why didn’t he think Lance had a more important problems than him and his exam?

“She kind of forgot everything. It was so scary Keith, she just emerged from her room and was in such panic – she didn’t remember anyone, not even my mom,” Lance continues shakily and an invisible arrow pierces through Keith’s chest, “she kept asking for abuelo Julio who died before I was born and _oh my God-_“

Suddenly Lance starts crying and his voice cracks, just like the rest of his heart and soul, but just like ever, Keith will always be able to pull him back. He finally takes the bonus step forward and hugs Lance around his torso, hoping that he feels all the love and affection Keith is giving him. He knows that the whole Ramirez family knows that Valentina lately wasn’t in the best mindset. He also knows how hard it is for Luna to take care of her and how is killing her mentally to look at her mother’s eyes and don’t meet any recognition back. He can’t imagine what it’s like since he doesn’t have a mom, but the thought of Shiro or Adam forgetting him is like the worst nightmare he’d ever have.

Not to mention, that Lance as a young teenager was also really close to her, so even if it’s harder for Luna, doesn’t mean it isn’t painful for her kids. Nadia and Sylvio weren’t as attached to her, but kids are always smarter than people give them credit for so maybe they felt sad and sympathetic for their dad, grandmother and aunts and uncles.

Lance embraces him back and Keith just shushes him in comfort, hugging him tighter while he buries his nose in Lance’s neck and wishes he could take away his pain. To see the person you’re in love with hurting like this felt like thousands of blades stabbing him. He has the urge to cry too, along with Lance, but he doesn’t dare. This is Lance’s moment to grieve and Keith knows if he starts crying too the taller boy would get worried and stop in order to comfort him. Which isn’t happening.

“Lance, it’s okay, let it out,” Keith murmurs and apparently feels brave enough, because he plants a small, soothing kiss on Lance’s neck. He’s not even sure if he feels it, because of all the sobs that are currently wrecking his body and it may be in his head, but to Keith it feels like Lance relaxes a little under his touch. So Keith does it again.

And again.

And again. Again until he’s lost count on how many kisses he’s given or how long they’ve been standing in front of his house door in the late quiet night, embracing like they’re the last people on Earth.

Eventually Lance calms down and stops crying against Keith’s jacket (or not, he’s still not sure to whom it belongs to) that has a wet spot. His crying stops and he just stands there breathing against him.

Keith’s kisses don’t.

He keeps nudges with his nose, kissing gently and airily against Lance’s warm skin just like he wished and has been dying to do so. Lance doesn’t protest against it, doesn’t give any indications he doesn’t want it, but when he reaches Lance’s cheek hesitance weaves his way into his heart. His mouth stays there, just a few millimeters away breathing against his skin, afraid to make the next move. Lance picks up his head from Keith’s shoulder and sadly, he isn’t facing Lance’s freckled cheek anymore, but rather his chin. Keith loudly and internally curses his height.

Keith isn’t short by any means, _in fact_, he’s actually above the average height for a man, but Lance’s father must have been a giant or something since all of his kids have long limbs for days. Rachel is only one who took her height after her short mother, because Veronica is taller than her and she’s the youngest. Of course, for Lance as a basketball player is an advantage and he may have another growth spurt while he’s in university so a bonus for him, Keith guesses.

“I uhm… thank you for this,” Lance says at the end and pulls away from him. Keith misses the warmth, but gives him a small smile.

“No problem. I’m sorry that I overreacted, I shouldn’t have assumed you didn’t care,” Keith mutters and hugs the jacket closer to himself when the air suddenly gets colder.

“It’s okay, it’s no one’s fault really.”

There’s a silence that settles between them and Keith tries to fiddle with his hands, when he realizes the flash drive Lance gave him is still in his hand. He raises the small thing in front of their eyes and sends Lance a look.

“Should we go inside and watch it?”

Lance’s face breaks into a heart-stopping smile and Keith feels his abdomen setting on fire.

“I’d love to.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE FORGIVE ME FOR THE CLIFFHANGER :(
> 
> I actually intended to stop the chapter after keith got angry so it'd be more painful, but then i realized im not in a place to do that after i DELAYED AGAIN so i made them make up , but not kiss TWICE because im evil like that. i really really hope u liked this chap and if u want share all of ur fav moments below! i wanna thank u all, current readers and new ones, for all the kudos, comments and hits. i really appreciate it more than i let on!!
> 
> ALSO before i dip, ik im posting in a time where the "hype" died down, but please go to change.org and sign as many petitions as u can regarding the BLM movement and the horrible crisis in Yemen. 2020 truly is a horrible year, but we may look at it back with fodness in the future, because with all the changes we'd be able to make NOW. i created this au in the future where in a perfect world in 2055 there'd be no racism, homophobia and everyone just has unrequited love problems. ik it's unrealistic, but who knows? like one of my fav politicians Bobby Kennedy has said : "Some men see things as they are, and ask why. I dream of things that never were, and ask why not.” :) <3
> 
> love u all and thank u from the bottom of my heart for liking my work!


	7. high school sweethearts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “When will you learn that I-“ 
> 
> _That I’m in love with you?_ The words almost stumble out of Keith’s lips like water on the edge of a cup. Horror grips him once again at how thoughtless he is tonight.
> 
> “That I want to be there for you always when you need me?” He says instead.
> 
> Lance’s response is to only kiss his knuckles.

Keith’s first birthday in the States was the most amazing experience in his life.

Or at least – the most amazing experience for a kid turning eleven who had been an orphan his whole life. Shiro and Adam both had their days off from work and picked him up from school on that day. Keith still remembers all the Halloween decorations, since it was a week and a day after his birthday. He was in the classroom, sitting by himself, wondering if he’ll have the opportunity to go trick and treating with all of his classmates. No one actually invited him, because he didn’t have any friends at that time. It was sad, but the joy of having a new dog was blinding all of it. He briefly dwelled if it was as fun as everyone said it would be.

Needless to say, he spent the 23rd of October at the local zoo, which didn’t have many animals, but it’s not like Keith had seen much when he was in Korea. Adam bought him ice cream and Shiro won him a stuffed purple hippo that squeaked out ‘I love you’ when you pressed its tummy. He was already a bit old for the phase for plushy animals, but Keith never had one so he was allowed to have fun with his hippo. That was also when his fascination with the animal started and despite all of that – Keith still keeps the toy on his study desk in his room.

Halloween didn’t deliver any disappointments too.

Shiro proposed to Keith to dress up as him and he was not in fact amused at all with that. Of course, he downright refused as he continued writing his homework. Adam laughed with tears for five minutes straight at that. Keith simply dressed up as the new Galaxy captain from this space show that was getting pretty popular for the past two years. Shiro was a knight and Adam – a vampire. They went all the way from Texas to Alaska only so they can visit Kolivan Galra, who was Shiro’s teammate many years ago. Apparently, it was a tradition to go to his house during all the holidays and since Keith was the new addition to the family – he was ought to meet the guy.

The house he was living in was absolutely massive, beautiful red bricks neatly stacked next to each other, big windows and somehow wooden interior – all snuggled nicely in all the white snow Keith was seeing for the first time.

And if the house was massive, then so was the owner of it. Nothing prepared the small boy from seeing the huge figure greeting them at the door. Kolivan was the epitome of big, with his broad shoulders and hard, bulky muscles which he was obviously still working hard for despite the fact that he was retired.

At first, Keith was too scared to even look at him. He had a big scar running on the right side of his face, that was absolutely sick and badass in Keith’s eleven-year-old opinion, and a very long black braid that was so elegantly done, that at some point Keith just couldn’t hold it in and asked him about it. It was perhaps the fact that Keith also wanted long hair when he grew up, which was why he got attached to Kolivan pretty fast. The man let out a really tiny smile that Keith doubted people witnessed much, but they still sat down near the fireplace as Kolivan answered all kinds of questions.

He found out that Kolivan was born in a Native American tribe from Alaska and told Keith that his long hair symbolized his extension of the soul, the physical growth of the spirit, and manifested his connection to all things. Little Keith was floored by everything that came out of this man’s mouth. Eventually, he even got interested in basketball and asked Kolivan to teach him how to beat Shiro. By all means, his cousin was not amused when Keith stepped really hard on his foot so he could steal the ball. Shiro was also offended that Keith only got interested in the game, but only if Kolivan talked about it.

After this particular Halloween, Keith always anticipated with excitement all the holidays like Thanksgiving, Christmas, and Easter – only because so he could finally see _uncle Kolivan._

But when Keith, Shiro, and Adam moved to Florida, due to Shiro’s new work as a teacher in Voltron High, celebrations (and especially Keith’s birthdays) became something way more spectacular and important the moment Lance barged into his life.

Lance, with his colorful and passionate-self, changed Keith’s life and his opinions on holidays.

If his birthdays before were simple and fulfilling, now they were exciting and heartwarming. Lance always had something up his sleeve when it came to birthdays for all of them.

The same could also be said for the whole Ramirez family, in fact. In their first year in the neighborhood, Luna invited the three of them along with Kosmo to their Christmas dinner. It was loud, with a loving atmosphere and loud Spanish filling the air and it was especially harder when Adam himself was Mexican and joined without any trouble, leaving Shiro and Keith in the dust. Of course, Keith was picking up some words and phrases since there were a lot of Latinos and Hispanics living in Texas and he had learned a small proportion, but it was still too fast for him to understand.

And even then, the food was absolutely tasty and amazing. Keith couldn’t complain, especially when all of them were so kind and welcoming towards them all. He loved every minute of it, even if he did miss uncle Kolivan a lot – that Christmas was maybe the one that changed everything. It gave him hope that he finally found his true home; his true people.

Then in the next year, when he and Lance were now friends was when his birthday turned into Lance’s personal missions to make them his best days ever. Keith and the rest of the gang celebrated with him only two birthdays since he and Lance weren’t yet close in freshman during October, but Keith hoped the tradition would keep ongoing.

His 17th birthday with Lance and the rest was spent at the Arcade, where Shiro gave him the money beforehand mysteriously because Lance forced him to keep it in secret. It was fun and he cried laughed when Hunk and Allura furiously broke the Deal or No Deal game, as they almost won and chose the wrong suitcase. Lance absolutely beat his ass at the shooting game and the basketball one, but then Keith fairly got back at him with the motorcycle and ice hockey. Pidge made a ten-year-old cry when she destroyed him at FIFA and Mortal Kombat and was grinning like a fool when Matt tried to calm the boy down so his mother won’t come angry.

Afterward, they went to a restaurant, and then Lance had a sleepover at his house. They ended up cuddling but never talked about it when they woke up. Mainly, because the wound from Rolo’s cheating was still healing and Keith wasn’t ready to admit these new feelings he had for his best friend.

No birthday however could compare to his eighteenth one.

He was incredibly sad that week, because of two failed assignments and not to mention his marks quickly dropped pretty low that said month. When he looks back at that – it isn’t a big deal now with his current problems, but October last year had everything ruining all around him and he was helplessly watching it crumble.

And by that, he utterly forgot about his birthday.

He went on his day at school, half asleep the whole time and no one mentioned a thing nor congratulated him so Keith had no idea when it was 3 PM and he left alone with none of his friends in sight. Of course, he should’ve known something was fishy when he came back to his house and Adam wasn’t there, but he didn’t care as he only dropped on the couch and fell asleep.

Then suddenly, he was awoken by a hand, shaking him out of his slumber. It was Lance who miraculously had gotten into his house and told him to get dressed because he had a surprise. Keith didn’t ask any questions, but was still curious when Lance hurried him inside his car and drove him to God knows where for one hour. He knew that he should’ve asked, but honestly, Keith was at this point of his crush where if Lance asked him to do anything, Keith would’ve complied without any thought. A bit unhealthy, he knew, but Keith’s self-esteem was way lower than specific from last year.

But then … they had arrived.

They had arrived in the next city where Keith’s favorite artist – Regris Keaton – was on the last day of his tour. It was no secret Keith has started admiring him at the moment he started getting _really_ into art. To the point where he decided that he’d be doing this professionally one day. Regris's art connected with Keith’s soul in such a way that no artist had ever done. Regris was the man who made him _pursue_ art.

An entry ticket for one of his exhibitions was mad expensive, and while he knew that Shiro had the money, it felt wrong to the black haired to ask for so much.

But there was Lance.

Lance, in front of the local gallery with its big windows and white marble, looming over all the people with fancy clothes and hairstyles, who were patiently waiting for the doors to open.

Lance who bought two. One for him and one for Keith.

_“Umm … surprise?” Lance side-eyes him and shyly offers a ticket. “I … I saved up from my pocket money and had the gang give me some too so we could go together. I hope you don’t mind.”_

_Then he smiles softly. “Happy birthday.”_

_Keith stares at the paper in Lance’s hand and his eyes widen at what he hears. He looks up at his best friend. At the boy that is currently nervously biting his lip, waiting for an answer._

_But Keith can’t find the words. He doesn’t think he can ever express with words or actions how much he’s grateful for this person next to him, who keeps sacrificing so much of himself so he could make Keith happy. _

_But at last, he hesitantly takes the ticket, with his heartbeat pounding in his ears and his fingers shaking. They slightly brush against Lance’s skin and Keith wishes he could take his hand. He wishes he was brave like everyone made him ought to be._

_“Do you like it?” Lance asks and his voice is too quiet. Too insecure and shaky. Keith doesn’t like how once again Lance thinks he is not enough when he’d already gifted Keith the best present he could ask for. And by that, he doesn’t mean the ticket._

_So he reaches up slightly on his toes and presses a faint kiss on Lance’s warm cheek. “I love it, Lance.”_

I love you_, he almost says. _

_And then he smiles with all of his might and he hopes Lance understands that this smile is only for him. Only for the boy with a golden smile and blue gems in his eyes. “Thank you.”_

After the exhibition ended, non-surprisingly all of his family was waiting for him back at home with a chocolate cake, huge smiles, and meaningful gifts. It also wasn’t a surprise that yet another year, Lance stayed at his room for a sleepover. It was slowly becoming a tradition.

This time there was no shame as they snuggled under the covers and Keith once again thanked Lance for the best birthday ever. At that statement, Lance scoffed and rolled his eyes, but Keith saw through the disguise and knew that Lance appreciated the compliment. They watched two movies on Keith’s laptop and talked for maybe hours until Lance slowly drifted away mid-talk about how some basketball player was wrongly accused of something his coach did.

It was frankly adorable – the way he used his hands to describe the situation, the way his eyes glittered when he was passionate about what he was talking about.

His eyes were closed and his eyelashes were curling upwards, just like his hair did sometimes. The freckles he had were more prominent than ever under the moonlight. Lance was breathing softly through his nose and Keith perhaps acted too creepily when he lightly traced all of his handsome features with his finger. Then he too cautiously laid his head on Lance’s chest, afraid that if Lance woke up he would push him away. Lance’s steady heartbeat lulled him into sleep and when he felt a hand wrapping around his waist, he blushed and snuggled into Lance’s side more.

And that night, on 23rd of October, Keith knew he’d completely fallen in love with Leandro Ramirez.

{ * }

“Ugh, god fucking dammit where is it,” Keith mutters under his nose as he searches for the small red device in the drawer, trying not to make too many loud noises. It’s close to 1 AM and he knows that if Shiro or Adam wake up and see Lance here with some mission to watch something that apparently needs a WLT hell would break loose.

Okay, maybe he’s exaggerating since he knows that none of them would have a problem, but they’d still be pissed if Keith wakes them up.

There is too much useless stuff that his brother and brother-in-law keep in there. It’s all collecting dust and unnecessary space, alas every time he brings it up it’s always, _‘Stop whining we might need this one day’_ or _‘When you get older you’ll understand, it all comes ridiculously in handy’_.

He picks up a stack of papers and when he looks them all over, it’s all tax receipts from ten years ago. He still fails to see how this would come in handy.

“Do you need help?” Lance asks from his place on the couch where he’s sprawled like he’s about to fall asleep any minute. It’s clear that he’s only asking out of politeness since it’s obvious that he’d complain too much if Keith agrees.

“No,” grunts Keith and starts putting everything he’s taken out back on its place.

“Mmmkay then.”

After he’s done, Keith opens the second drawer that’s under their big TV and prays to all kinds of Gods that he finds the stupid WLT in here. Adam bought it solely because he wanted to watch this one Japanese drama show that Shiro watched by himself. Sadly they only had one season with English subtitles, and the show itself had eight seasons, so hooked and whipped Adam bought a WLT so he can watch it with his husband.

Afterward, it was used here and there, but not too much when the majority of the movies and shows were quickly translated or broadcasted on the local channels.

There are too many photo albums, cables, more and more papers … a fucking broken plastic heart? Why the fuck Shiro or Adam would need that for? There are two books and a CD of some Latin singer that must belong to Adam. There are old charges and more pages when he finds it.

There, in the corner, so small he could’ve missed – the shiny red WLT.

“I found it,” says Keith proudly and reaches to take it. He grazes his hand on something, but he’s too tired to get angry at yet another dumb thing his guardians are stocking up in here.

“Damn finally,” mumbles Lance, and Keith hears him getting up from the coach.

Keith turns around to glare at him, WLT in hand, and perhaps bangs the drawer too loudly when he whispers angrily, “What do you mean _finally_? I basically did all the work!”

The black haired gets up from his place on the floor, his butt and feet freezing when he walks towards Lance, who has his eyebrows furrowed in offense.

“You’re so acting like my mother right now! I offer help – no, _Leandro I got this don’t touch anything_, but then I don’t do shit and she goes – I do everything in this house and none of you lazy rugs even try to offer a hand,” then Lance throws his hands in annoyance. “Pick a side!”

Keith rolls his eyes with a smile and gestures with his head to follow him into his room.

“That’s because you’re a klutz and your mom’s afraid you’ll break your neck if you even dare to sweep off the floor,” Keith jokes and doesn’t need to turn around to see the betrayed look on his best friend’s face.

Keith absolutely knows that Lance in no way slacks off when it comes to chores and occasionally helps Luna with the house, just like the rest of the family. It’s still fun to tease him to no ends though.

“We’ll see what a klutz I am, when I get into the White Lions and you’ll be all ‘Oh my god, I actually knew that guy – he was my friend back in high school’ and people won’t believe you, because _you_? Knowing Lance Ramirez? A joke,” says Lance, fake cockiness on his mouth as he high pitches his voice when he imitates Keith who absolutely does not sound like that.

They start going up at the stairs, heading for his room, and Keith snickers. “In your dreams maybe.”

Lance follows with a laugh too and Keith feels it too close behind his neck. It’s a beautiful sound that warms him all over and he wonders if one day this feeling; these reactions caused by Lance being beautiful and funny, and kind would lessen. Keith is too tired of hiding it all. His head burns with the memories of just minutes ago when he had Lance pressed up against him, lips just close enough to kiss him on the mouth that he knows it’s soft as it looks.

Lance is once more too close and too far away for him to reach.

But they do reach Keith’s room at least.

Keith pushes with his palm lightly against it and winces at the slight squeaking noise it makes. He sees Kosmo lifting up his head in the dark and his blue eyes glow with the help of the moonlight. Lance immediately starts cooing at him and the dog gets up excitedly from the warm place on Keith’s bed. Everyone knows that Kosmo adores Keith, but some part of him knows that Lance is surely his soft spot.

His tail wiggles as he pads towards Lance, with a tongue lolling out of his mouth. Keith smiles fondly when he hears the door closing and Lance’s knees hitting the floor, most likely greeting his dog with open arms and a wide smile.

“Hello you handsome boy, how have you been doing, huh? N-no, _no_ Kosmo not there you know it _tickles_-“

Lance begins laughing and it’s so damn infectious that Keith can’t resist and throws a subtle glance over his shoulder. Lance is now laying on his back with Kosmo trying to lick him all over his face. Lance’s hand is distractingly trying to push him away from his neck that Keith knows is ticklish – his head is thrown back, white teeth on display and his heart jumps in his throat.

He will really miss Lance the most if he is not accepted into Altea.

With a bittersweet smile, Keith turns around and makes his way to his desk. His laptop is left open from the night before when Keith was still writing his history assignment and he moves the mouse to see if there’s any battery. The screen lights up and Keith’s eyes fly to the right bottom of the screen.

8 5 %

Should be enough to last, thinks Keith and shrugs in dismissal. He inserts the flash drive, that he pulled out of his pocket, and the WLT in the USB port. Lance’s laughter and Kosmo’s huffs are a distant background noise as Keith wonders what Luna could’ve possibly given to Lance. And with the mission to watch it with him no less.

A box opens with a loading rectangle and Keith sighs. He grabs his laptop and begins to carry it over to his bed where he will probably watch the video with Lance. With the process, some papers and notebooks fall over and Keith flinches with the mildly loud noise it causes. He hopes it’s not loud enough for Shiro and Adam to wake up. It seemed his desk is way messier than it looks.

He puts the laptop on his blanket that has been rumpled by him and Kosmo. On the screen, it says the translation scanning will take ten minutes, and apparently, this is the time in which Keith has to mentally prepare for being intimately close to Lance for who knows how long.

He gets distracted too long by the circle going in … well, circles and Keith dozes off ridiculously, his mind wandering in some direction that he himself can’t follow.

He’s way too hypnotized, but when something moves and his attention slips away from the white screen – embarrassment washes over him. Lance is mildly kneeling, collecting all the mess Keith had caused with Kosmo panting next to him.

Keith springs to his feet. “Oh my god, I’m sorry about that. I kind of dozed.” 

Lance huffs and waves a hand, “Dude calm down, it’s all right. It’s just some leaves and two notebooks. I am manly enough to lift these bad boys.”

He carefully puts said notebooks on his desk while he says that and winks up at him. Keith’s flush burns even hotter. He’s never prepared for Lance being flirty with him and it’s like vines twine around his ribs, squeezing him because his love for him is too much. He feels like he’ll explode. This boy is literally made out of gold and good parenting skills, isn’t he?

Keith kneels too and grabs two pencils that are too far away from Lance’s reach.

“I really hope Shiro didn’t hear all of this,” says Lance, and Keith doesn’t look up. “He’s still mad at me enough for punching Griffin and getting myself in detention, but I don’t know why he’s upset anyway, I mean, I was accepted in my uni already and Ryner was kind enough not to suspend me ‘cause it’ll be really shitty if she decides to mention it to the professors and coaches in Altea, because then … it would be a … huge …”

Suddenly Lance trails off his blabbering too distractingly. Confused, Keith raises his head to look at what’s going on.

“Problem …”

The brunette has his brows furrowed and his narrowed eyes skip over, reading something from a white page. It seems as if it’s strangely glowing under the light. The material of the paper is thick and heavy – the same material used for wedding invitations. Lance’s eyes skip faster and faster with every word, but before he can even ask or remember what Lance had found, his blue eyes snap at him.

And they are full of incredible sadness.

“What is this?” Whispers Lance with a broken tone and turns the paper so Keith can answer.

The moment Keith notices the big black logo with a white owl in the middle and the elegant cursive font printed over the expensive texture of the paper, he averts his gaze. Because he knows what Lance is holding and no one yet knows about it. Not even Shiro or Adam.

“Keith explain,” Lance demands softly, but there’s a hard edge in his voice too now. Keith begins shaking his head and gets up from the floor. It’s not a big deal to Keith when he received that call last week, the woman announcing he has a letter addressed to him at the local Post Office. But he understands why Lance is taking it in the wrong way. He understands why Lance is thinking he may leave.

Perhaps it’s good Keith breaks it gently for him. People are right when they say that no matter how many times you plan something, it will always change its path and surprise you.

Keith puts the fallen pencils he had found on the desk and tries not to eye Lance who he feels is coming closer to him. The letter is put in front of him, but the black haired doesn’t have the need to examine it. He has the first sentence imprinted in his brain from all the times he has read it again and again.

_Dear Mr. Kogane,_

_We are delighted to inform you that you have been accepted into the Naxzela Fine Arts program with Drawing & Painting for the 2055/56 year, beginning in September. _

The rest was information on where he should sign in or call, what are the dorms and living options around the university, but he knew that only the first sentence was the thing Lance needed the most. Keith’s fingers twitch, but he still doesn’t dare to take the acceptance letter into his hands or look at Lance’s eyes. He’s too much of a coward for that.

Lance takes a shaky breath. “I … I don’t understand.”

Keith finally snaps his head, face twisting into annoyance. Maybe not at Lance, but at himself. He wishes it would’ve been easier for him, after all these years, to share and not to keep at himself. But some part of him is still afraid of getting hurt, of hurting the people he loves.

“What don’t you understand, Lance? It’s just an acceptance letter from Naxzela.”

He looks up at Lance on his right and is not surprised at the slight anger that had found home on Lance’s features. His eyebrows are furrowed and his lips are pressed in a thin lie like what Keith had said brought him infinite dissatisfaction. He still doesn’t get why his best friend is so upset. Surely he remembers that Keith took the Altea entry exam just hours ago? There are some long seconds that feel like hours stretching between them and Keith doesn’t take off his gaze from Lance’s face. His blue eyes not once settle on him and jump from the letter to some idle spot somewhere behind Keith.

“Were you gonna tell me?” He finally settles on coldly and looks straight at Keith this time.

His tone isn’t accusing nor angry, but there’s something in it that has Keith gulping. He can’t actually tell what Lance is feeling or thinking and that scares him more than he’d like to admit.

“Of course I was,” whispers Keith and begs with his eyes for Lance to believe him.

He knew that sooner or later everyone would get informed that if Altea didn’t work out, he’d already had a back-up plan. And Naxzela truly wasn’t a bad university, in fact, they had an awesome program and just like Altea, it was hard to get accepted into. And even though Keith wouldn’t be miserable at all if he studied there, he still wasn’t giving up on his dream of getting into Altea so easily.

“But I thought Altea was the only one? Why all of a sudden you’re telling me you’re accepted into fucking Naxzela?!” His quiet yells still stay in the respectful volume, but they still rise as his voice cracks at the name of said university. “I thought we told each other everything and left all the miscommunication behind?”

‘I thought we told each other everything’ he said. It’s so ironic to Keith because Lance could never be more wrong.

“Lance,” Keith begins softly and grasps the brunette on his sides. “You can’t honestly expect me not to have a plan B. I know Altea is my dream and we both wanted to still be together after high school, but …” then his eyes drop lower. “It’s time to accept that maybe we will part ways after summer.”

It’s morbid and it’s breaking Keith’s heart to watch how the confusion morphs into hurt on Lance’s face. His eyes widen and the black haired is baffled at how surprised by this statement the boy is.

“N-no,” objects Lance and starts shaking his head, trying to move away from the grip Keith has on him. But Keith is persistent and doesn’t let him.

“Lance, just listen to me. I still want to go to California with you, Allura, Matt, and Hunk. I still want to study in Altea. But there’s a possibility I won’t get approved and the risk of me not having a reserve variant is higher than you and I would want to.”

Unknowingly Keith has taken even a closer step to Lance. He knows he’s sounding desperate and pleading, but he doesn’t care. He wants, no … needs for Lance to realize that he will hold on tightly to this friendship for the rest of his life. He won’t let Lance slip away just for some useless miles and an insignificant distance between them. As much as Keith is lying to himself that it won’t kill him not to be physically next to the boy he loves.

“Naxzela is in freaking Anchorage, Keith! _Alaska_!” Then he throws his hands up and finally breaks away from him.

Keith has no time to let the panic wash over him at the thought of Lance going away, but it doesn’t settle in when he sees Lance just walks towards his bed so he can sit on it and put his head in his hands.

With sorrow in his movement, Keith pads to him and crouches in front of him.

“I know- …” Lance sighs. “I know that you have the perfect reason to want another alternative for yourself so you can feel comfortable, but …”

Lance takes away the hands from his face only so he can hang it down low in what Keith can call the perfect imagery of misery. With his hunched back and tense shoulders, the black haired wishes he’d given better words of comfort. He was never good at this thing and maybe that’s why Lance was someone so special to him. He always understood what he meant even with an at first invisible action.

“Naxzela is so far away and maybe I’m just scared you’ll forget about me,” he follows with a humorless huff that it’s incredibly loud in the dead room. “Which, I know it sounds stupid and you probably think I’m a jerk for whining about something that’s not even confirmed.”

Then those blue eyes, the blue that’s so familiar to Keith, yet something new every time he looks at it in a different light, bore right into his. The color of ocean depths is so dark and loving that Keith almost physically melts with the intensity of it all.

“I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’ll miss you,” whispers Lance eventually so close to his face. Keith blinks at that and Lance’s breath, still smelling like alcohol, hits him warmly. The scent of wine and something sweet fills his nose and he wishes he can lean forward, taste it himself with his tongue. To capture those lips in a kiss and never let go.

Keith tentatively reaches up with his hands. He seizes up Lance’s cheeks in a gentle cradle and presses his forehead against his. Lance doesn’t even hesitate and leans in. The moment is so pure. It’s beautiful and one in a million that Keith understands why Lance is so hung up over this.

Keith is too. They both know they have something precious that only they can provide for one another. The distance would crush their souls painfully slowly.

“Are you crazy?” Huffs Keith. “I could never forget about you,” he mutters and scoffs right at the same time Lance does. Their eyes are still closed, yet somehow Keith can see everything around him.

Then Lance makes a subtle move that has Keith lifting up his chin slightly. He doesn’t take the risk to peel his eyes open. Because if he does – this might turn out that it’s all a dream. A utopia made just for him; a place where Keith is not a coward and doesn’t fly away from this. Lance’s soft lips touch his jaw and Keith shudders with the euphoria that the touch causes him. His heart is pounding and he can’t breathe, but it’s all worth it if Lance keeps on with this teasing, but weirdly loving motions.

Just when he feels Lance swallowing and breathe in as if he’s about to say something – a sound cuts through the air.

_BEEP _

_BEEP _

_BEEP_

The sound of his laptop announcing that the WLT is done with the scanning startles the pair and Keith doesn’t waste any seconds more on the floor. He springs on his feet, stumbling backward with a step as if he was under a spell. His head feels heavy and he’s dizzy, but he can feel that his heart can rip itself out of him and fly away from how fast it’s beating.

This, Keith has noticed, is happening too much for his liking. Not that he minds that Lance possibly wants to kiss him again, but it’s a weird concept to him now after so long. Didn’t Lance have enough from all these months of them only kissing and kissing, to the point Keith needed new lungs because of it?

The blush on his face that was caused by the closeness of Lance’s lips and face next to him continues being present even he stumbles to the device, eyes scanning over. There are only two videos titled with the same numbers that were written on the flash and Keith’s fingers shake with nervousness as he clicks on the first one. Meanwhile, Lance himself doesn’t waste time and gets up, circling around his bed so he can settle next on Keith’s right and the boy gulps down the bulge in his throat.

“You seriously have no idea what is it?” Keith croaks out and watches the video loading. He silently turns to his friend and arches an eyebrow.

Lance’s eyes are glued on the screen and his jaw twitches along with his mouth. All of these motions are familiar to Keith. Motions, giving away that Lance isn’t really super excited to watch whatever his mother gave him.

The boy shrugs. “I think it has to do something with my family since it’s probably in Spanish. I’m not sure what though.”

His gaze changes direction and settles on Keith. “She said no one has ever watched it.”

Well, that certainly didn’t calm Keith down.

This was a proportion; a sacred part of the Ramirez family history (if Keith went by believing Lance’s assumptions) that Keith was about to witness with his own two eyes. He still doesn’t understand why Luna would want him specifically to do it along with her son. But she’s a smart woman so with all of his might, Keith is putting his trust in her hands and hopes nothing bad comes out of this.

He hears Kosmo’s bell tingling as he probably moves to jump over the bed and Keith grabs the laptop so he can make space for his pet. He puts it between both of them and increases the screen when the loading stops. Keith’s heart is beating fast and he wonders if it’s maybe worse for Lance who will be the truly affected one here.

For a moment the black haired asks himself if he should reach out and hold Lance’s hand, just for the emotional support of it all, but then the sound of laughter stops him from his train of thought. Keith jerks his hand towards the screen and his eyes widen when he notices a beach.

The person giggling isn’t keeping it straight, because of the laughter, but Keith can still make out the small crashing waves, bathed in pastel orange and yellow because of the setting sun. There are palm trees around and it all literally looks like some picture out of a holiday card meant for a gift. Keith feels Lance shifting next to him and he secretly eyes him. The boy has leaned in closer to the screen like he’s about the enter the video, curiosity written over his face. His eyes are narrowed slightly, but Keith decides not to say anything so he turns to the video again just on time.

_“¿Esta encendido?”_ A deep distinctly male voice questions and Keith feels Lance freezing, but he wills himself not to look anymore. He’s been doing that too much tonight and it isn’t good for his heart.

[Is it on?]

_“Espera, espera, espera,”_ the voice of an young woman calls out and she continues laughing between her words. _“¡Sostén esto ahora y grábame como si fuera modelo de una revista elegante!”_

[Wait, wait, wait.]

[You hold this now and video me like I am a model from some fancy magazine!]

Keith glances at the subtitles underneath, because while he understood most of it, he still needed a confirmation that he heard the correct thing. The voice is familiar and is followed by a deep humored huff. The camera angle shifts again and Keith has no time to prepare himself, because all of a sudden he has a Luna fucking Carillo right in front of him.

She’s seemingly younger and obviously in the burning flame of her youth. There are no wrinkles around her eyes, no worry lines and her hair is the color of midnight black with no white to be found. Her brown skin is basically glowing and the twinkle in her eyes is so innocent and pure, that the life is basically radiating of her, completely unaware she’s going to have a hard time for the next years. The freckles are so many – so much more than right now; on her cheeks and nose with some tiny moles here and there. The dark blue is sparkling as if all good things in life were gathered into one place and put in that gaze of hers.

Luna was _fulgent_ and _beautiful_.

At the same time, Keith is absolutely moved by how much of her kids he sees in her as she starts posing, laughing and jumping around like a little kid. The man holding the camera chuckles at her antics, especially when she trips over her feet in the sand and almost falls in the water.

He can see Rachel as she has the same hair as her mother. It’s so big and shiny, looking soft under the sunlight. The same childish behavior and innocence. He sees Veronica when Luna starts picking up shelves from the shore, a calculating frown on her round face just as the same one her youngest daughter does. Luis is present, when she winks and wiggles her eyebrows as she notices the camera on her.

Most people thought that Lance was the flirty one in the family, but he was told that he only copied what he saw from his oldest sibling. It all had to have some origins, right?

Marco shines through, when she looks so lovingly and caringly at the person who’s videoing everything. Lance’s older brother has these gazes that make you feel so comforted, as if your whole essence is being embraced in a warm blanket made of sunshine.

He sees Lance in her smile.

It’s no surprise to anyone that he is her copy when it comes to physical appearance, but their smiles are something else. They have the same dimple. The same goofy, excited bright look that lights up everything around them. The blue … the blue that’s so angelic and lovely, that sometimes has Keith wondering if some higher power took their time specifically to put these literal sapphires in their eyes.

It’s so painfully evident that Luna has put so many important parts of herself into her kids that it makes Keith want to tear up. His mind once again drifts to his own parents. What he wouldn’t give to see one of them at this very moment. To see how they look like. To see what parts of them he carries within him.

He steals a glance at his friend. Lance has a mellow smile on his lips, the corners lifting up to create a painting that has Keith’s heart bursting at the seams. His eyes are suspiciously glossy, but Keith doesn’t dwell on that fact nor asks. His blue gaze jerks on the side and meets his own. The brightness of the video reflects in them and it is almost as if it were stars inside them instead.

Lance offers a tiny chuckle. “She used to be like that all the time. A long time ago, when we were still Cuba. Happy and shining. Through the time, it all kind of dulled and it died a bit. I know she’s not sad or miserable with our life here, but sometimes I ask myself if it’s because we had to leave the country.”

His Adam’s apple bobs as he visibly swallows. “I know a part of her died along with my father too. She’ll never get it back.”

Lance turns his eyes back on the screen and no matter how much Keith desires to comfort him – he does the same.

The person holding the camera starts walking faster when Luna is standing too far. She turns around when she hears approaching and laughs at whatever she sees on the man’s face.

_“¡Estas tan sudado!”_ she says with a snigger and reaches with her hand forward.

[You’re so sweaty!]

_“Hoy hacía mucho calor y acabo de regresar de una reunion,”_ the man whines out loud and in response, Luna rolls her eyes fondly. _“¿Qué tal si intentas estar disfrazado todo el día, mi amor?”_

[It was hot today and I just came back from a meeting.]

[How about you try being in a costume all day, my love?]

They both laugh soundly at that, but Keith feels his breath catching up in his throat at the endearment words. His eyes widen and he throws a disbelieving glance at Lance who … doesn’t look surprised one bit.

“Wh- wha- wait a damn minute,” Keith stutters and points a finger at his laptop, the Spanish speech a distant buzzing noise now. “Is that … your …” he trails off and notices how Lance doesn’t move a muscle, his stare glued on the video.

“My father. Yes.”

He confirms with such a freezing tone and it leaves Keith with a small shudder. Lance doesn’t mention him much, but has told Keith the major things. How he was filthy rich, kept leaving and leaving along the years until he permanently left with no trace two years after Veronica was born. Then he died six years later, although Keith hasn’t bothered to ask from what since it felt too personal already. There was some trouble with a court case, Keith distinctly remembers, but overall he knows as much as the next person who’s a close friend to Lance.

This now … this seems intimate. Keith doesn’t feel like he should see it. Why Luna thought it’d be a great idea to make them watch this is beyond him and he considers if he should tell Lance that it’s okay if he doesn’t want him to keep watching. He’d understand.

Suddenly, this time the laughter is louder than the previous times and Keith brings his attention once again on the screen, guilt growing up inside him.

They get quiet and Keith only manages to hear the soothing noise of the waves. Luna’s face softens and she glances up at her man.

A teasing smirk appears and Keith blinks surprisingly at that. It’s an unusual expression on her, but as Lance said, she was different before. Which makes sense, people don’t stay the same and they grow up. They mature. But Keith still finds himself feeling bizarrely nostalgic of the fact that he didn’t get to meet the Luna that was happier. The Luna that glowed like the sun.

_“¿Estás nervioso por lo de mañana?” _

[Are you nervous about tomorrow?]

Her question is uncertain and Keith notices the insecurity broadcasted with her eyes and figure that slumps over when she hugs herself. Some kind of shadow passes across her face and Keith’s heart breaks. Nervous about what?

_“Me caso con el amor de mi vida,”_ the man replies with an affectionate snort and Keith inwardly gets taken aback by the amount of adoration in his tone. _“¿Por qué estaría nervioso?”_

[I’m marrying the love of my life.]

[Why would I be nervous?]

The camera angle shifts as it’s being lowered and Keith and Lance are left with watching the shoreline upside down. But they still hear the voices of the pair. He hears Luna sighing.

_“Lamento que tu familia no venga. Sé cuánto significa su presencia para ti.”_

[I’m sorry your family isn’t coming. I know how much their presence means to you.]

Keith turns to his best friend with a questioning look. He suddenly gets hit by the realization that Lance not once has mentioned something about his grandparents on his father’s side. Of course, he has wondered before, but Keith felt that it’d be overstepping the boundaries too much with that question.

“Do you know your other grandparents?” The black haired asks hesitantly and notices that Lance looks confused and aghast at what he had heard. Maybe Lance didn’t even think he would ever know more about his family when it comes to his dad and his parents.

“I …” for a split moment Lance’s eyes jump from him and then go back to the screen. “Mom has admitted that we have relatives back in Cuba, but she hasn’t said anything else. Everyone frankly hated my father too much to even care,” he says and blinks tiredly. “I always wanted to know more though.”

With a strange and sudden spark of bravery, Keith reaches out with his hand and touches Lance’s. The black haired hopes he transmits perfectly the comfort he’s trying to convey onto the boy.

He’s not surprised anymore when the warmth of his friend’s hand passes down to his coldness, softening him and making Keith melt around like ice cream on a July day. The horribly familiar butterflies start flying around and he suppresses a lovesick smile. It gets worse especially, when Lance answers with no indecision and intertwines their fingers in a sure grip.

Keith argues with himself as he thinks over if he should put his head on Lance’s shoulder, but the voice of Lance’s father startles him into getting out of this soft love-state Keith fell into.

_“Cariño, no quiero que pienses en ellos mañana._ _Este es nuestro día y lo vamos a pasar sin importarnos quién nos apruebe o no,”_ the man comforts softly and Keith can literally feel the love he has for Luna just by the way he talks and what words he uses. _“Piensa también en el pequeño. El bebé no querrá a su mamá triste, ¿eh?”_

[Darling, I don't want you to think about them tomorrow. This is our day and we're going to spend it without caring about who approves of us or not.]

[Think of the little one too. The baby is not gonna want his mommy sad, huh?]

“Little one?” questions Keith out loud, but doesn’t get an answer from Lance who is now glaring at the laptop as if it had murdered his nephews. The sudden swift in Lance’s mood surprised him but then something in his mind clicks as his eyes flit to the flash drive. A baby was mentioned so that means that in this video footage Luna was already pregnant with one of her kids.

_But which one? _

They also talked about a wedding, but Keith doesn’t exactly know if they married before they had children or afterwards.

“Lance, Luis is twenty eight, right?” He turns his head to Lance for confirmation just to see his head nodding. Luis is the oldest and if Keith’s calculations are right – then that means that he was born in 2027. He squints with his look at the paper, at the written numbers ‘070926’ that are starting to make sense with all the seconds that seem to pass so quickly. Lance’s hardened peer hasn’t peeled away from the video, but Keith’s mind gears are running with no rest just when the whole puzzle pieces itself just right in front of him.

He gasps softly and with the hand that’s safely tucked in Lance’s one, he tugs him to get his attention. The brunette hums and complies as he looks over.

“Lance, that’s a date,” Keith says, awe in his voice but also pride at himself for figuring it out. “July the Ninth 2026. Luna is pregnant with Luis here so that means that this … this right here was the day before their wedding.”

Keith would be lying if he was saying that he wasn’t wary of Lance’s reaction. To watch these romantic and personal moments shared between these two people, people that are Lance’s parents, must be weird for him. Hurtful. And to witness such a thing as a wedding? Keith is worried that this would take a harder toll on Lance’s emotions than he’d let on. He feared he’d keep the mask he sometimes bothered to use too much and forgot to take off when he was with Keith.

And now as he gazes at Lance; at his blue eyes that usually hold so many different emotions; at his handsome face that is always twisted into a grimace full of feelings … all of it now was awfully empty. Void and hollow. His heart drops in his stomach at what he’s seeing. This is the Lance that sadly Keith is the most unfamiliar with. And he wishes he’d knew a faster way to help him. To soothe the pain away like he was cool water and a healing balm against a third degree burn.

_“¡Muy bien, ahora creo que es su momento de ser entrevistado, Señor Ramírez!”_ The voice of Luna and her laughter startles Keith before he can ask Lance if he’s okay or ask if he wants him to stop watching. But with the way Lance’s head jumps from the flash drive to the laptop screen again.

[Alright, now I think it’s your time to be interviewed Mr. Ramirez!]

It seems that Luna is tugging the camera away from the man’s grip and nothing prepares Keith for the sight of someone he knows yet has never seen before. Of course, he knew that only Lance took his looks completely after his mother (except for the hair) so Keith was simply left assuming that the rest of his siblings were all some scattered physical pieces of their other parent. Brown hair, brown eyes, brown skin and long limbs.

And when the angle, finally for the first time, allows him to see what he was all about – Keith is so truthfully surprised that he almost does a ridiculous double take.

The man in front of the camera was definitely the one who looked like a model. His dark brown hair, that Keith finds with marvel is the same color as Lance’s, is in a man bun, but with the rest of its long length is left framing his face. It reaches his shoulders exactly like the way Luis keeps it. The area around his chin and cheeks is entirely bare, with only one or two scars near his nose. He’s squinting with his eyes at what Keith judges is probably because the sun, but the black haired still sees the warm coffee-like color in them.

Rachel’s eyes.

His lips are formed in a small loving smile and with something, only close to surprise, Keith grasps on the fact that he’s not even looking at the camera lenses, but rather at the woman behind it. It makes him think if he also looks like that when he’s giving Lance his attention.

Nevertheless, this is certainly and undoubtedly Mateo Ramirez in all of his young glory.

Something about the way he looks, the way he’s talked so far makes hard for Keith to believe that this is the same man who had caused so much pain and unhappiness to his own wife and children.

_“Me haces sentir como si estuviera en uno de esos videos,”_ he whines and there’s playful mirth in him. _“Setenta y tres preguntas con Vogue.”_

[You make me feel like I'm in one of those videos.]

[Seventy three questions with Vogue.]

It must have been a joke or something of the sort, perhaps a joke funny in those years, since Keith doesn’t get it, but the way Luna snorts and starts laughing loudly – it seems it was peak humor back in the twenties.

_“Señor Ramírez, ¿se casa o no con la mejor mujer de Cuba?”_ Luna is using a fake snobbish tone, voice high pitched giving away that she’s faking the cockiness.

[Mr. Ramirez, are you or are you not marrying the best woman in Cuba?]

Keith hears Lance making a sound for the first time in minutes after Keith pointed out the wedding date and it was a huff. A small, barely hearable huff, but obviously one caused by his mother’s humor had Lance smiling in his hand that was supporting his face.

“She’s talking just like me and Luis,” he mutters and this time Keith lets a chuckle escape him.

Mateo scoffs and his mouth opens in a wide smile, revealing white teeth in the perfect example of those looks the stereotypical “bad boys” in the movies have. The black haired briefly deliberates if Lance’s father was a heartthrob just like his son. He grins at the image of a smirking Mateo trying to win a stubborn Luna over.

“_Cierto es_,” the man answers softly and once again he broadcasts with his eyes the love he bares for his fiancé. The adoration is basically pouring out of him.

[I am.]

The answer must have been surprising for Luna since Keith hears her choking and coughing with a following laughter. Keith smiles at the way Mateo grins smugly and is such a manner that screams _Lance_ and has Keith pausing stupidly in the middle of it. Because yes, Lance is a Luna copy, but Keith can definitely see that this is not one hundred percent true. The grin, the loving gaze, the flirty smirk are all things Lance possesses and toys with perfectly when he wants to. He especially uses these secret items when it comes to playing with Keith’s heart.

There’s a small pause between them, but it’s Mateo’s fault as the man has simply started watching the beach, at the end where the sun sets behind the ocean. Luna comically zooms on his profile and the water, going back and forth between them. It’s only the waves crashing quietly and the seagulls screeching annoyingly in the background now.

Then suddenly Luna speaks up softly after she has settled the focus perfectly on her fiancé’s face, _“Si el bebé pudiera entenderte ahora mismo, ¿qué dirías?”_

[If the baby could understand you right now, what would you say?]

Keith sucks in a hushed breath at this and his eyes very subtly skim over to his right. Lance is biting his lip and there’s a weird crease between his eyebrows, but sadly Keith can’t tell if it’s nervousness, sadness or annoyance. Could be all three, but now it’s not the time to ask. It _is_ weird. After all, they’re hypothetically speaking about Luis and obviously haven’t planned on having more kids this early on when Luna was pregnant with their first. But it still doesn’t mean Mateo would think differently for his first son than all of his children he willingly made later.

_Whatever he’s going to say can apply to everyone,_ Keith thinks. _Luis. Marco. Rachel. Veronica._

_Lance._

_“Mmmm,”_ hums Mateo and he closes his eyes blissfully as he brings his face up. _“No me importa si eres niño o niña, pequeño, pero nunca olvides que siempre van a existir dos personas que te amarán incondicionalmente. No importa qué.”_

[I don't care if you're a boy or a girl, little one, but never forget that there are always going to exist two people that will love you unconditionally. No matter what.]

Then he opens them, the warm brown looking straight into the camera now, and his face twists into the most lovesome expression ever. He blinks once, twice and maybe it’s a trick of the light, because Keith swears he saw his gaze glittering wetly. _“No puedo esperar hasta el día en que te conozca. Y nunca olvides que tienes la mamá más increíble del universo.”_

[I can’t wait until the day I meet you.

And never _ever_ forget you have the most amazing mom in the universe.]

At this point, Keith can’t handle it anymore and looks at Lance. His best friend has two tears falling silently down his cheeks while his bottom lip is slightly trembling. Today was a hard day for Lance, it seemed – first his grandma, then Keith and Naxzela and now this emotional mess with his father. It is more than evident that it got too much for him so this time the black haired doesn’t give a fuck about borders anymore. There isn’t any restraining nor there isn’t any fear that he’d do something wrong or ruin it, because it all got overshadowed by his desire to comfort the boy that has done the same for him millions of times.

All the hugs, the late night talks, all the tears Lance had seen from him were so many that Keith couldn’t count the time he has felt unworthy for finding such a gold in the middle of nowhere.

So Keith reaches out and presses the space bar so he can pause the video and before Lance has time to protest, the black haired brushes with his free hand the tears away from Lance’s cheeks in the gentlest way possible. Lance glances down in shame and he unwillingly squeezes Keith’s hand tighter than before. More tears fall, but now Keith simply forces the boy to put his head, so he can be tucked in Keith’s neck. He continues sobbing faintly against his collarbone and Keith can physically feel his heart tighten at the pained sounds.

“I don’t even know why I’m crying,” Lance manages to mutter between all the crying and Keith shushes him softly while he cards his pale fingers between Lance’s locks.

“I mean … it’s normal to cry over that Lance. I myself pretty often get nostalgic when I think about my father and cry,” he mumbles and rests his cheek on the crown of Lance’s head. “Sometimes it’s because you think of what it could have been if they were still here, if they’d proud of you, if they loved you like they were supposed to. And … I know it’s not really my place, but judging by what I just watched, your dad would have been immensely proud of the person you’ve become.”

Lance sniffs and looks at the screen, eyes dripping with melancholy. “You think so?”

_“I know so,” _Keith doesn’t miss a beat and starts rocking them gently like they’re on a swing during an autumn day and the leaves fall around them in an orange-yellowed-red rain. “I surely am.”

At this Lance sighs with a laugh and Keith feels himself smiling softly against the brown hair. Its scent leaves him dizzy. “Dammit Keith, how will I live without you …”

And if Lance was looking at him, he would’ve seen how Keith answered everything with his eyes. The brunette has always told him that the saying _‘The eyes are people’s windows to the soul’_ was made specifically for Keith. He doesn’t know how true it is, but right now when he holds Lance in his arms, they are undeniably screaming the opposite. _Damn_, how can _he_ live without Lance?

How can they live if they are too away from each other’s reach?

Without saying anything else Lance presses play again and the video continues with Mateo and Luna laughing together. The boys probably missed the next thing they’ve said to each other due to the crying and heartfelt talk in the middle of it.

_“También le diría al bebé que su madre tiene caca de pájaro en la camisa,”_ says Mateo and he snorts out loudly and ugly.

[I would also tell the baby that their mother has bird shit on her shirt.]

_“¿Qué? ¡No es mentira!”_ Luna squeaks out behind the camera and with a mirthful huff Keith watches the easiness Lance’s parents interact with. They remind him of Shiro and Adam, although for Keith no couple can compare to his cousin and husband when it comes to being grossly romantic.

[What? No I don’t!]

But just when Mateo lets out a booming cackle with throwing his head back – something white splats on his left cheek with a loud sound. The man immediately comes to a stop ridiculously and an unexpected giggle erupts from Keith’s chest. Lance follows too in unison with his mother and soon they can’t stop laughing while looking at Mateo’s stunned expression.

The man stutters and reaches out on a reflex to wipe out his face, but Luna lets out a loud noise of disgust that stops him in his tracks.

_“Espera,”_ says Luna with a laugh and the last thing the pair sees however as the first video comes to an end is Mateo’s fond, lovesick smile while there’s bird poop falling down on his cheek.

A box appears in front of Lance’s father face with the words PROCCEED NEXT VIDEO FILE? but Keith is just staring, sitting there speechless and he too late realizes there’s a small stupid smile on his face. He strokes Lance’s hair as if to ask a wordless question on _what now? _Do they watch the next one now, tomorrow or maybe never? Is Lance comfortable enough to continue?

But Lance without saying anything else sniffs wetly and breathes out. The silence is comfortable, but somewhere deep in Keith’s chest buzzes with excitement and he can’t help himself, but want to watch more. Of course it’s all up to Lance now, but the black haired is still curious over the second video and if he’s right about the fact that it’s Luna and Mateo’s wedding.

“Should we …” Keith begins, but no words come out of his mouth afterwards. It’s like someone has put a strong hand over his lips, preventing him from speaking up no matter how much he wants to. Keith gulps and looks down at Lance’s curly hair.

“You know what’s funny?” Lance finally lets out and Keith feels him shuffling on his side like he’s making himself more comfortable on Keith’s shoulder. The black haired hopes Lance isn’t able to hear his fastened heartbeat, because for Keith it’s all he can hear now.

“What?”

Lance lets his head fall onto Keith’s lap and looks up at him, those eyes glittering and shining from the tears from earlier. His eyelashes are wet and so are his cheeks and it takes all of Keith’s strong will not to lean down and kiss him. “All my life I’ve been making my dad to be out some kind of monster. A husband, a father who left his family over and over again and never bothered to come back. But now …”

Then Lance turns his gaze away from Keith and looks on his left where the video has ended. Mateo Ramirez is still smiling. “Now it’s like I’m meeting him for the first time. And I kind of wish I’ve never watched this just so I can keep pretending my father is the most horrible human being and not actually a loving man whom I’ve never had the opportunity to actually meet.”

Keith doesn’t remove his staring from Lance’s face.

He watches with fascination how thousands of emotions flee in front of him. From a small humorless smile, to a calculating frown and finally settling on to a thoughtful actual genuine smile this time. Keith wishes he could bottle up this moment, save it somewhere in an endless hole into his heart and brain. The amount of love he feels for this boy was so overwhelming sometimes. It was like fire and ice at the same time. Burning flames overtaking him, burning him from the inside while slow, freezing ice was covering his whole body from head to toe with this feeling. A hurricane of so many emotions were swirling in his chest and it was one of those times where Keith _really_ had to distract himself and Lance otherwise he’d end up kissing the life out of him.

“Well at least you know what he was like,” mutters Keith and brushes Lance’s hair away from his face with his fingers. “I don’t even know the name of mine.”

Lance jerks his head towards him and he’s full of sympathy, a sad look passing like a ghost on his face. Then he grimaces and reaches out so fast with no time on Keith’s end to react to take a hold of Keith’s hand that’s caressing him. “_Shit_. Keith, I didn’t even think that this might affect you somehow! Ugh, I’m so _so_ stupid I should’ve stopped it the moment I saw my dad! I was so caught up in my own emotions that I didn’t even bother to ask how _you’re_ feeling about the situation and now you’re probably sad and I-“

Keith puts his free hand over Lance’s rambling mouth with a light laugh. Of course Lance would worry about Keith’s feelings when he’s currently the one who’s been having father issues for some time. He shushes his best friend and when he makes sure Lance won’t say something stupid again – he removes his hand.

“Lance, I’m not sad at all trust me. It has been years and as I’ve said … I don’t even know him.”

His tone is careful and quiet like some part of him thinks that whatever he’s going to say out loud next will boom like a thunder in the house.

“Sure, I miss the fact I’ve never gotten to know him _and_ …” he takes a deep breath and curses the fact that his eyes are burning from unshed tears about his own family; his own missed chance of getting to know his real parents. “And my mother. But I have Shiro and Adam. I have Pidge and Hunk and Allura and Romelle and Matt. I have Luna.”

Then Keith blinks and in the process he sees a fresh tear falling down on a freckled cheek as he squeezes Lance’s hand tightly. “I have _you_.”

There’s something hiding in Lance’s beautiful glance. Like he’s holding something back. After a while he feels Lance’s very warm hand nestling on his cheek, brushing away the next tear before it falls again. It seems that they always brush each other’s tears, like a brand for their friendship.

Keith remembers it as if it was yesterday. The first time he has ever been vulnerable with Lance and opened up a part of himself for him to see. He had a huge fight with Shiro and he barely remembers for what it was about, but the black haired still feels the wound that was left open after that argument. He secretly packed his bags when he made sure he and Adam were asleep. A backpack full of snacks, his phone and charger. Blankets, some underwear, his toothbrush and good old stolen fifty dollars that Adam thankfully left in the inside pocket of his coat. 

He was on his way to the bus stop, backpack a bit bigger for his small sixteen year old body. He was just getting some muscles at that time, but it was still a lot heavier than Keith expected it to be. His phone was on silent mode, because he knew Shiro and Adam would start calling like crazy once they realized he’s gone.

Keith remembers the way he was holding so securely the fifty bucks in his hand, afraid of the blowing wind that might take his money to freedom away. The screen showed that there was one hour until the bus to Texas and Keith’s eyes were skimming over the info again and again, desperate to get away from this stupid Florida. Away from Shiro who thought he was Keith’s father, away from feeling like a disappointment and like he’d never achieve anything great.

Just now he realizes how dangerous this stunt was. It was after one AM and he was lucky and a huge surprise that no one didn’t take an advantage of a short teenager with a huge backpack and money in his hand. Keith was sitting on one of the wooden benches, waiting with his cold hands in the pockets of his hoodie with his head hanging low. It was dead silent.

Until a figure dropped so heavily on his left that made Keith jump from the sudden motion as he woke up from his sleepy daze. He scrambled to get away from the stranger with all of his survival instincts on guard – regret that he didn’t take any weapon of the sort. But soon everything settled in to calm and then annoyance as he caught the sight of _Lance_.

Long story in short, Shiro called Luna in the middle of the night to ask if Keith was there and unfortunately an awoke Lance heard the conversation and knew where his friend was probably at. Keith had the suspicion that Lance left without telling his mother too, hence why he was dressed in his pajamas. Not to mention the sleepiness in his eyes was evident. But so was the determination to convince Keith not to catch the bus for Arus. It took lots of yelling, lots of fisted hands and anger, but at the end the black haired couldn’t hold it in himself anymore and collapsed against Lance’s chest as he let out all the heavy shit he had been holding in for some time. The tears fell and fell, but the brunette never ran away or tried to talk anymore. He just held Keith close and stroked his back.

_“Let’s just go back home, Keith.”_ Is all he had to say for him to gather his bag and walk back to his house, Lance’s hand on his shoulder.

That was the first and not the only time Lance had seen Keith’s ugly tears, his breakdowns and sobs over how much everything hurts him. Lance was there when Rolo broke his heart. Lance is there with his warming hugs and loving eyes to support him whenever Keith doesn’t want to admit he needs his best friend. Keith likes to thinks he delivers back the same amount of unconditional love Lance gives … and yet just the simple idea that strikes him as a lightning that he might not be actually doing it – has the power to kill him.

“When will you learn that I-“

_That I’m in love with you? _The words almost stumble out of Keith’s lips like water on the edge of a cup. Horror grips him once again at how thoughtless he is tonight.

“That I want to be there for you always when you need me?” He says instead.

Lance’s response is to only kiss his knuckles. His dark blue eyes drink from every expression on Keith’s face, he sees. As if Lance is daring him to say something about it, but deep down they both know the cowardice is too strong and prevents him from doing the same. He’s still in marvel at how valorous he was earlier. On the porch where he kept kissing all the free spaces on Lance’s skin. His lips burn when he thinks about it. He wonders if his best friend feels it too.

So without continuing the conversation further on, Lance peels his intense gaze away and presses the YES button and the second and last video begins. Keith’s heart is in his throat, but he only tightens his hold of Lance’s hand.

At first it’s only black. Black screen with no sound and Keith is grateful for the fact there isn’t any lightning around only because in that way he won’t witness the sight of him with his burning cheeks. But then there’s a sound and just like the first time, still nothing prepares Keith for the sight of Lance’s mom.

She’s sitting on the floor at what it seems a bedroom that’s covered in all kinds of posters and furniture. The walls are painted deep purple and the light of behind the window is streaming over in her room, the big long black curtains pulled on their sides. The floor is parquet and Keith notices all kinds of random subjects whom have found places on it. From hairpins, hairbrushes, make-up kits and brushes to fucking _plush toys_, phones and a speaker that is letting out an energetic tune with a significant Latin beat.

But then he notices it … and he starts gaping.

Luna is in a distinguishable white wedding dress. The top is elegant with a beautiful flower laced design, sleeveless but with only two white thin strings going over her shoulders. There is a gorgeous necklace made of silver laying gently on her neck and in the middle – a fairly big baby blue diamond that Keith can’t help, but notice matches the jewel of the ring on her finger. She has her eyes closed and the black haired sees another woman that has the same curly hair as Luna, but the only difference is that hers is a light brown rather than black.

She’s using a small brush that due to Allura’s helpful knowledge about make up Keith knows is for eyeshadow. The unknown woman is brushing on Luna’s eyelids, coloring them in a beautiful deep burgundy. Luna’s hairdo is simple – a long fish braid thrown over her shoulder, but the very tiny glittering stones in it makes the hairstyle look of one that belongs to a celebrity on a red carpet. There’s even a small tiara on the top of her hair making Luna look like she’s the princess of Cuba.

The woman that has been doing the make-up sighs happily and leans back as she expects her work. Then she extends a hand towards the camera without looking, like she’s a doctor during a surgery. _“Mamá, dame el delineador de ojos por favor.”_

[Mom, give me the eyeliner please.]

But when there’s no reaction on the person who’s recording, she turns around with a scowl on her face while Luna in front of her peeks with one of her eyes. Then she starts laughing out loudly at whatever she sees, her mouth that is in a deep red lipstick stretched out in a wide smile as it shows her teeth. Lance next to him stands up.

“That’s my Tia Lucianna,” the brunette breathes out and Keith’s eyes widen. Now this is certainly a relative of Lance that he sees for the first time. Her eyes are light brown and her skin is just a bit darker than her sister’s. There is a small mole under her left eye and with a surprise that Keith doesn’t know why finds she has a _piercing_ at the end of her brow and ring on her nose. Keith already likes her.

_“Mamaaa, ¿qué estás haciendo?”_ Lucianna whines out and gets on her feet with an annoyed huff.

[Mooom, what are you doing?]

And when it finally settles on that this is Valentina … _biabuela_ Valentina, Keith’s eyes sweep over to Lance, worried that this is another wound that was freshly done and this felt like putting not just salt, but acid on it too. And he’s unfortunately right. Lance’s eyes have shadowed slightly and he gulps, but there are no sign of tears in his eyes. Maybe he’s tired of letting them out.

_“Estoy tratando de tomar una foto, pero esta cámara está siendo una estúpida puta,”_ a bitter voice grumbles out and the both boys explode with laughter at the comment along with Luna and Lucianna. _“Juro por Dios que solían ser mucho más fáciles, pero últimamente los han estado haciendo para alienígenas avanzados con un coeficiente intelectual de más de trescientos.”_

[I'm trying to take a photo, but this camera is being a stupid bitch.

I swear to God they used to be so much easier, but lately they’ve been making these for advanced aliens with IQ over three hundred.]

Luna buts in. _“No mamá, simplemente no me escuchas cuando hablo de mis cámaras.”_

[No Mom, you just don’t listen to me when I talk about my cameras.]

Lucianna finally arrives at her mom’s side and grabs the camera away from her grip. The angle changes and it sets on Valentina whom looks obviously much younger. Almost thirty years younger to be exact. Her black gaze is piercing and alive, and with her mildly lengthened brown hair and expressive eyebrows – it’s definitely heartbreaking to compare her to the person the time had turned her into now.

_“Eso es porque estás haciendo un video en este momento,” _says Lucianna and soon they both get into an argument about how much technologies have changed, although Keith doesn’t sense anything other than a teasing banter between a parent and her daughter.

[That’s because you’re making a video right now.]

“Is Lucianna older than your mom?” Keith finds himself asking and he glances at Lance whose head has fallen into his lap again. Lance nods.

“My mom is a middle child,” he explains and Keith’s memories finally click into their places as he remembers about the fact that Lance also has an uncle too. Sadly, no names come into his mind, but he must be the youngest sibling in Luna’s family.

_“¿Dónde diablos está Armando? Dijo que va a estar aquí con los pendientes, pero apuesto a que ese idiota está coqueteando con la hija del padre de una amiga,” _mutters Lucianna and Keith raises an eyebrow at the name. It sounds strangely familiar.

[Where the hell is Armando? He said he’s gonna be here with the earrings, but I bet that dumbass is flirting with that daughter of friend’s dad.]

He looks down at Lance who has a small, fond smile on his lips. It must be nice, Keith thinks, to look at all of your relatives and how they’ve used to be. How much they’ve changed; how they looked like when they were so young.

“Wait … is Armando the drunk uncle who thought his wife was cheating on him with a taco?”

He starts laughing at the memory and Lance rolls his eyes with a grin. “Isabel and Marina still laugh with tears whenever we remind them of it. I bet Tio wants to strangle us.”

Their speaking gets cut off when the door of the room is suddenly opened with such force that the pair flinch with the sound of it. Keith looks at the video just in time for Lucianna to turn around with the camera so they can see who caused the interruption. At the sight of the door and the person, Keith wonders as he looks at the black haired _boy_ how the hinges haven’t come off.

He is breathing heavily at the entrance, holding a small blue velvet box. The pink tie around his neck is loose and his white shirt is open at the collar. His hair is slicked back, but perhaps because of the obvious running he does have some strands that have escaped and were now falling in front of his eyes – that were the same color as his mother’s ones.

He closes the door behind him and with confident strolls he goes next to Luna, handing her over the jewelry box. _“Lo siento, pero el tráfico era horrible y sin mencionar que papá de repente quiso al baño antes de que saliéramos de casa.”_

[I’m sorry, but the traffic was horrible and not to mention that Papa suddenly wanted to take a shit before we left the house.]

_“¿Donde esta él?”_

[Where is he?]

Valentina demands and walks over to her daughter who is opening the box. Luna’s mother kneels in front of her and takes the earrings that seem to be some kind of dark blue diamonds in the shape of a circle with silver surrounding them. And maybe too fast, Keith realizes why the color makes something in his heart and stomach throb.

It’s the exact same shade of blue in Luna’s eyes. In Lance’s eyes. The blue that Keith has looked into so many times that even his dreams and nightmares were all in that hue. That blue seemed to haunt him whatever he does; whenever he goes.

_“Fue a la barra a tomar una copa con Juan. Dijo que volverá para darte la llave del hotel,”_ says Armando and brushes his hair back with the help of his fingers. He unties the tie only so he can tie it again whilst watching his mother putting on the earrings on Luna’s eyes.

[He went on the bar to get a drink with Juan. He said he’ll come back to give you the hotel key.]

_“Te quedan bien, Luna.”_

[These look good on you, Luna.]

Luna beams at her brother, but before she can respond to his compliment – the voice of Lucianna calls out behind the camera. _“Te ves horrible, ¿te besaste con Isabel García antes de venir aquí?”_

[You look awful, did you make out with Isabel Garcia before you came in here?]

The reactions are immediate afterwards. Valentina snaps at Lucianna with an ‘Ay!’ while Luna and Lucianna once again start laughing. Armando starts protesting against it claiming that he doesn’t like Isabel at all, that she’s just a friend and he doesn’t like her that way, but judging by the way Lance previously mentioned a woman named like that … Isabel for sure wasn’t just a friend. It seemed that Tio Armando did get the girl at the end.

And while laughing Valentina helps her daughter up with a hand and long at last the boys finally see the wedding dress that belonged to Luna Carillo.

While the top was for sure beautiful, the skirt was satin, looking smooth and shining like a river, even resembling a falling waterfall. The front was shorter than the back, allowing them all to see Luna’s high heels and ankles that both had small bracelets around them. There was a wide glittering belt around her waist and now that Keith knows that Luna was pregnant during this – he could see the very small bump when she turned around to show the back as her family demanded. The back of the dress was low, allowing them all to see Luna’s brown shining skin and the small moon tattooed over her shoulder blade.

_“¿El cinturón está demasiado apretado?”_ Valentina asks and when Luna answers with a shake of her head they all cheer and gather around for a group hug.

[Is the belt too tight?]

_“Incluso con esos zapatos, apenas llegas a mis hombros,”_ Armando snickers next to Luna and earns himself a nice punch at the back. The boy stumbles with the force and just now Keith notices how _tall_ Armando actually is. He’s seemingly looming over all of his family members and with a full realization Keith finally grasps on that Lance, along with his older brothers and Veronica, got the long legs not from his dad – but his _uncle_.

[Even with those shoes you still barely reach my shoulders.]

_“Bien, tomemos una foto de verdad ahora,”_ says Lucianna. Valentina grabs Luna around the waist with a smile that just broadcasts how much happiness and love this mother is feeling for her daughter while Armando throws a hand around her sister’s shoulders. He raises a sneaky hand behind her for bunny years, but the video stops before something else happens.

[Good, let’s take an actual picture now.]

Keith opens his mouth to make out some kind of comment, but before he can even let out a sound – the video changes.

Now instead of a bedroom, the space of the place is unquestionably different than the previous. He catches the sight of Luna before he even knows he’s looking for her. She’s standing in the middle of an altar, under an arc made out of white roses and two stone columns by its sides. There is a white carpet trailing behind it along with Luna’s wedding veil that shines under the sunlight. Vases full of bouquets with white and blue hyacinths, pink roses and stocks. Behind the altar there’s a gorgeous brown wooden gazebo that has beautiful lights falling from the top ceiling and ends on the sides like a tent.

The person who is recording is passing without a word on the side of the carpet and Keith witnesses seemingly how many people have come to the wedding. Mateo is on Luna’s right side, dressed in a white tuxedo with his chestnut colored hair in a low ponytail. The priest in front of them speaks in Spanish of oaths and God, but Keith can’t listen. He’s too busy watching all of the beauty unfolding in front of his eyes. On Luna’s side there is a woman dressed in a peach pink dress that ends to her knees, while on Mateo – a young man in a black suit with a pink bow and short brown dreads that are falling nicely in front of his eyes. They both hold tiny pillows and without looking or zooming, the black haired knows that those are maid of honor and the best man with the wedding rings on them.

The usual follows afterwards. The vows, the announcement they’re officially married, the kissing between the bride and the groom, the putting on the rings and the signatures from all parties. It should be formal and serious, but by the looks of everyone – they’re all having fun and are happy to be there, in that place; at that time. But most importantly not once has Luna nor Mateo have stopped genuinely smiling throughout the whole process. And Keith definitely knows the difference between the real and the fake ones.

Then they announce that the newlyweds have to have their first dance and all the guests quickly start walking towards the gazebo, gathering around it so they can have the best view of it. The man who is supposedly Mateo’s best man takes the hand of another man from the crowd with curly hair and kisses his hand. Mateo leads Luna on to the dance floor but thumps his friend’s back with a laugh. For Keith it’s just an ordinary picture – two friends teasing each other over their significant others. A fleeting moment for him.

And yet … a moment for Lance that means so much more. A scene that shows; that proves that Mateo would have been supportive of Lance. Been there for him and for his coming out as bisexual. Love him for who he is just like Shiro and Adam love Keith. Just like Alfor loves Allura. The same way Romelle’s brother loves her. And as ridiculous as it sounds it does make sense. After all, Luna Carillo wouldn’t ever settle for a shitty homophobic husband, wouldn’t she? Keith gazes down and something pierces his chest when he sees Lance is smiling.

Genuinely. A pretty toothy smile that shows his dimple on his cheek and because of it the black haired feels his mouth stretching out too. Like a reflex; a primal instinct in his body. To feel dizzy with happiness whenever he sees Lance happy too. It just reminds him of how much he wishes to have the boy for himself, to envelop him and never let go of him and this moment. It makes it hard for him to breathe.

Keith gets a grip suddenly as he hears the gentle strings of a guitar. The recorder zooms on the faces of Luna and Mateo. They’re smiling softly at each other and take holds of one another while everyone arounds them gently start clapping. The voice of man begins singing the song and Keith smears his thumb over Lance’s hand.

_Se va llenando la noche_

_Con rumores de canción_

_Y se enreda en tu ventana_

_Mi serenata de amor_

They both know what they’re doing judging by how perfectly they move on the dance floor. Mateo leans down and whispers something in Luna’s ear and just like the sun, her grin shines on everyone around them in a blinding light.

_Las estrellas quedamente_

_Empiezan a susurrar_

_Y va llenando la noche_

_Mi serenata de amor_

The guitar sings along with the man a beautiful song, that despite all odds sounds strangely nostalgic for a wedding. It’s like they’re both weeping and grieving over the person they’re talking about. This time Luna says something and plants a small kiss on her husband’s cheek. The white dress follows her body as they whirl in front of their guests.

_La luna se vuelve plata_

_Cuando cae en el maizal_

_El viento se va llevando_

_Las notas de mi cantar_

_Es la noche de mi tierra_

_Que se han vuelto corazón_

_Con ella voy adornando_

_Mi serenata de amor_

There are flashes of cameras while Mateo twirls Luna in a soft circle and brings her back to his chest with a smirk when he catches her lightly stumbling because of her shoes. She glares at him playfully, but too quickly it changes back into that lovesick smile Keith saw too many times tonight. With gloominess in his chest, he realizes that he sees it for the first time. Maybe he’ll never see it again.

Is Lance realizing the same thing?

_Voy a dejarte mis quejas_

_Muy adentro de tu alma_

_Vengo a cambiar tus desdenes_

_Por un poco de esperanza_

Finally all the other couples seem to join the married one. Mateo’s best man and his boyfriend, Valentina and Julio, Lucianna and perhaps her husband. Keith doesn’t see Armando anywhere, but he doesn’t want to search for him anyways. His eyes stay glued on Luna whom puts her head on Mateo’s chest and now they simply sway like a ship in the sea during a chill, peaceful night.

_Fue para ti solamente_

_Mi sentida serenata_

_Que forjaron las estrellas_

_Y el viento de mis montañas_

The last chords of the song begin to end, the guitar trembling again with a melancholy melody that began to fade in the air like a perfume during the summer. Keith smiles but eyes begin to suddenly drop, the song lulling him to sleep like a familiar lullaby someone has been singing to him all his life.

He doesn’t realize he has fallen asleep. But the dream where _Keith_ was the one marrying the love of his life, _his Lance_ – the one and only – should have been telling him enough that it wasn’t real.

And nevertheless – he was still hearing those sorrowful cries of the guitar.

**. . . . . . .**

When Keith stirs up with the sun shining delicately down on his face he finds Lance next to him, reading the Naxzela letter with a weird look on his face. Keith doesn’t have the energy in him to say anything about it so he just hums to let his friend know he has awaken.

Lance doesn’t seem surprised, in fact, he looks like he’s expected him to wake up soon. The window is opened, letting out the chilly post spring air and Keith realizes he doesn’t find his laptop and is neatly buried in his blanket and put to sleep as if he did that himself. He hates himself for a bit that he won’t have the memory of Lance touching him and sleeping next to him.

But then Lance gingerly whispers as he smiles but without sending him a glance, “For the record, I think your father would have been immensely proud of you too.”

Those words are enough for Keith to fall asleep again with a smile.

Maybe it was another dream.

{ * }

1 week later – June 2055

If one day someone stupidly and out of nowhere asks what Keith likes the most about his school he’d say that it’s definitely the yard. It’s perhaps the most comfortable place around here and he can’t count on his fingers how many times he had took comfort in it. Whether there’d be under a tree providing a cooling shadow for him so he can write or draw in peace or the mellow green grass under him with its softness. And while Keith is the epitome of an introvert he couldn’t never deny the absolute blissful feeling he felt when he was around so many genuinely happy people.

Of course, a major point was that he was never in a close proximity to strangers which made it perfect for him. He knows that a lot of students preferred to study or read in the library, but also a student studying on a small colorful blanket with food next to them wasn’t a rare sight at all.

During the winter all this space was either dry and lifeless, but only in case if there wasn’t snow. Snowing was truly an uncommon thing to see during December or January, but it has happened once before. Logically snowball fights occur, snowmen and angels get created; people are red faced with jolly smiles on their faces. Knitted hats and scarves fall down on the white ground from all the pushing around. Even some younger teachers join the party, although the older ones prefer to only smile and continue on their way, attempting not to trip on the slippery ground. Last year Mr. Coran brought his newest sleigh and showed off to all of the high schoolers. Unsurprisingly after he mistakenly gave it to a sophomore who had never gotten on one broke it after he crashed into a tree.

Keith still gets reminded of it when the teacher dramatically starts sobbing as he reminisces about his _“precious and dear Josephina”_ in their art classes.

However, now in early June just when the summer starts and the heat is making them all suffer – everyone is usually found outside. And even though the Voltron High School is highly praised and given as an example, their AC surely needs to be taken care of better. So even if outside it’s the ninth ring of hell Keith, his friends and basically everyone who studies and works here would rather spend their lunch break outside than in the heated up closeted space they call school.

And currently that’s exactly what Keith is doing – going down on the entry stairs with all of the gang. Lance and Pidge are arguing in the back about a movie they watched together yesterday with Hunk that was absolute bullshit in Lance’s eyes – and a masterpiece in Pidge’s.

“The main couple didn’t make sense at all! And the protagonist was a fucking moron!” Lance exclaims and Keith can see with the eyes on the back of his head how Lance melodramatically throws his hands in the air.

He also hears Pidge growling in annoyance and Keith snickers along with Hunk. “Lance you fucking idiot Kaxel is _supposed_ to be a moron! That’s the point! Otherwise he’d be boring!”

“Oh so now if you want to be cool you have to act like an asshole?! By this logic Keith would be the most loved person in this goddamn school!” shouts Lance and Hunk puffs as if surprised at himself that he laughed and takes sunscreen out of his pocket. He offers it to Keith whom furrows his brows and turns his head around.

“Y’all don’t fucking dare to _think_ to include me in your shitty movie reviews. I only care about Legendary Defender, ” he says and takes up to Hunk’s suggestion for avoiding getting sunburnt. He spreads some cream on the tip his fingers and starts smearing all around his face. The heat is particularly bad today, making him sweat in places he’s never imagined they’d sweat. His hair is in a high ponytail with a big black hairclip keeping his bangs away from his forehead. Some days he’s horribly tempted to cut it all off.

But then he remembers uncle Kolivan’s long luscious hair and how far he has come with growing it out and keeps on silently bearing the torture of the hot weather.

At the mention of Keith’s favorite franchise, Lance and Pidge once again start discussing like they’re some old experienced art critics. Unlike he and Lance, Lance and Pidge most of the time agree on all types of media from memes, to video games to movies. But then, there are ones of those times where they disagree with one another which means he, Hunk and Allura will have to endure the loud blabbering and the rants full of swearing. Thankfully for Allura she still isn’t here due to a council meeting, but according to her texts in the group she should be over soon.

Suddenly Pidge cuts the conversation off mid-way and shouts out, “Lance! Start running!”

“What?! Why?”

“A group of boys on twelve o’clock are gonna take our tree and you’re the tallest so _GO_!”

Lance stumbles on Keith’s left which probably means Pidge has pushed him forwards as if Lance is some racing horse. And just as the junior has said, when Keith looks forwards there are indeed a group of seemingly younger boys joking and walking towards _their_ tree. Technically it doesn’t really belong to them, of course, but they always hang out there when they have their lunch breaks outside. And they’re not the only ones. _Everyone_ has their tree.

“_Actually_ Hunk is the tallest one-“

“Bro don’t you even try!” Hunk interjects for the first time they’ve gone outside. “You’re the athlete here, not me! I’m the engineer!”

Pidge hums in agreement and starts walking backwards on the front, facing them. “Hunk is right.” She pushes the glasses up on her nose and grins. The sun reflects back and Keith winces at the blinding light. “I’m the hacker, Keith is the artist, Hunk is the engineer and _you_, Lance are the athlete!”

They all collectively look at Lance who only sighs in defeat. He hunches his backpack and starts jogging towards the tree with his typical basketball run. Keith shamelessly checks out his long legs flexing and tight butt.

“You do know that people are more afraid of you anyways and they would’ve gotten up the moment they saw you … right?” Hunk asks after silently watching Lance jogging and slips on his sunglasses.

Pidge next to him giggles. “Yeah I know, I just love to fuck with him. It’s too easy.”

Keith scoffs and watches with mirth how Lance approaches the boys with a smile. One of them straight up turns around to leave at the sight of the senior. He sees the way Lance gestures animatedly with his hands as he probably explains that the tree right there is their property and they should leave. It is a bit rude, in Keith’s humble opinion … but he doesn’t give enough of a fuck to say something against it.

The group start nodding and they all change their direction with accepting huge smiles on their faces as if they hadn’t just been forced to get away from a perfectly available tree. Nevertheless the mission is still complete.

And honestly after years of knowing Lance, being friends with him and observing how he’s grown up and changed, Keith still gets shaken to his boots at how easily charming the boy actually is. He just whips out that gorgeous smile of his, winks or does these stupid finger guns that somehow work – and _voila_! Everyone is falling to his feet. No wonder those younger students from the library from weeks ago were talking about him like he’s a God.

With fast steps he, Pidge and Hunk head towards Lance whom has made it his goal to take out a goddamn blanket out of his backpack. It’s a nice yellow in a pastel shade with tiny red hearts embroidered on it. He plasters it gently on the ground and Keith feels himself smiling softly at how concentrated he is. How caring and thoughtful that he can’t believe people in the past have looked at him and have taken advantage of his goodness.

“Aww Lance, this is adorable!” Hunk coos and puts his bag next to Lance’s on the grass, sitting down. He zips it out and pulls a plastic box that Keith assumes is his homemade lunch cooked by his moms or by Hunk himself.

“Yeah Lance this is pretty cute,” Pidge butts in and lays down on her back. She reaches out and feels the fabric with her hand. “Did you steal it from your nephews or something?”

At this comment Lance simply kicks her side with his foot and scowls jokingly as she cackles.

“Fuck you Pidgeon! That’s a vital part of my childhood and you’re making fun of it! I used to sleep with this all the time when I was a kid!”

Keith huffs and takes a seat right next to her with his feet crisscrossed and palms back as he leans back so he can be more under the shadow that the big tree provides. He closes his eyes, breathes in deeply and enjoys all the noises around him. From Hunk shuffling with the tinfoil in his hands so he can open his food, to Pidge and Lance bickering, the birds singing and all the students who laugh, talk and play games. He doesn’t know what Altea or Naxzela might be like. He doesn’t know if they would be better or worse, but Keith is still going to miss this place no matter how he complained about staying in here.

The voice of Lance defending his blanket brings him out of his thoughts so at the end Keith just mutters loud enough for everyone to hear. “Yeah I think Sylvio sleeps with it when it’s winter.”

He immediately grins at Lance’s offended ‘hey!’ just in time to hear Pidge gasp.

“I fucking _knew_ it!”

“This is felony, Keith!” Lance screams and the black haired peeks with his eyes to see Lance across him lunging like he’s a wild lion hunting for its pray. He has a big smile on his face that he too stupidly tries to hide and since Keith starts laughing so hard with his head thrown back, he doesn’t notice when Lance grabs him across the neck, bringing him down. Thankfully the ground is covered by the blanket and Keith doesn’t worry about dirtying his clothes so he doesn’t fight back as he usually would against Lance’s antics when the boys fall with down with a thud.

Their laughter and swearing echoes all around the yard and despite all the loud chattering around them, Keith feels like that just by hearing him alone – they’d all figure out how in love with the boy holding him he is.

Lance brings Keith into headlock, ruffling his hair with Keith’s cheek smashed into his chest. He can’t help, but inhale Lance’s scent that consists of his deodorant and cologne. Usually Keith doesn’t like the smell of men’s colognes since they’re too heavy and choke him up whenever he smells them. However since Lance always has to be different in his eyes always buys this expensive one that not many can’t afford and it makes Keith weak in the knees whenever he takes even a simple sniff of it. Whenever Lance leans in or hugs him the black haired always expects that aroma feeling his senses to the brim.

It was especially harder when they used to kiss and make out … along with other activities that were perhaps not that innocent as Keith thought they’d keep up with. Afterwards it seemed that whatever Keith did, he couldn’t get rid of Lance’s cologne smelling, sticking onto his skin no matter how much he tried to wash it away. It was just haunting him every minute of the day and the fact that Lance is incredibly affectious and touchy wasn’t helping either. There were even days when his freaking pillow smelled of said cologne that made him end up going crazy with dreams of smooth brown skin, freckles and blue eyes.

“Oof- okay Lance I got it! Let me go,” Keith whines muffled as he’s still squished against Lance’s chest. He struggles to get away from his friend’s hold, but Lance is stubborn and keeps on holding him. Keith’s heart is going wild inside of him and his throat closes up with nervousness.

“I can’t believe Keith surrendered himself so easily,” comments Hunk while chewing, his mouth full of food still. Keith grimaces in distaste at the sounds, but makes a sound of protest at the back of his throat.

“Keith is off of his game it seems,” Pidge adds and this time Keith manages to glare at her with Lance’s bicep around him. She catches it perfectly and laughs even harder at the face he made.

Lance finally lets him go, but as he does that he falls backwards on the blanket. Inertia forces Keith to follow Lance back too and soon they’re both lying with their backs, looking like some couple cuddling instead of best friends who were jokingly wrestling. He tries not to think about it. Tries not to get it over his head, but Lance’s warm body beneath him feels so good that Keith allows himself some blissful seconds before Lance lets go. Seconds where he could pretend. Where he can feel that he’s something more of a friend for a Lance. More than just a person who’s made him feel good.

But the letting go doesn’t happen and instead Lance rearranges his hand so he can keep it around Keith. The black haired stubbornly keeps his gaze straight ahead, refusing to look anywhere else. He feels Pidge’s eyes burning him from his right and Hunk’s curious one next to her. Keith never allowed himself to show how much he loves Lance around their friends in fear of them messing in their relationship. Not that they’re bad people who’d something wrong, but from past experience he knew they were pushy. Pushy and would try to set them up or something ridiculous like that.

His brother found out by himself in a way only a person who has been living with him for years would know. Keith suspected that Adam knew too although thankfully he’s never mentioned or implied something about he and Lance being a couple unlike Shiro.

Still, he never dared to slip up in front of his friends as the risk was too high. He couldn’t control how he looked at his best friend, but he could control what he said or did in front of them.

In full of contrast with Keith’s frantic thoughts and brain running around in all kinds of reactions – Lance is the perfect picture of peace. He’s breathing slowly and even as if he has gone to sleep, but the constant humming that vibrates through to Keith is proof enough Lance is awake.

“Dude, I can’t believe we’re actually graduating in three weeks though,” Hunk says and they all mutter in agreement. It’s true. Keith still can’t process sometimes that he’s leaving high school soon. He’ll be at an university. He takes a big step in his life, but it doesn’t feel as major as it’s supposed to be. Shiro has started nagging him about choosing a costume months ago and funnily he still has nothing.

“Hah, speak for yourself,” mumbles Pidge. Since she’s still a junior it means she’s graduating next year and no matter much she plays aloof about it, Keith knows she’ll miss them as much as they’ll miss her.

“Awww Pidgey I’ll miss you too!” Shouts Lance, awing at the girl even when she scowls and crosses her arms.

“Whatever,” she replies and Keith smiles sneakily at her attitude, not missing her sad tone. “Anyways I’ve been meaning to ask …“

Keith’s body tenses at the suspiciousness in her voice with his breath getting stuck back in his throat. He carefully sits up as not to scare Lance off and even though it was nice to be close to his crush, the summer heat is crueler. His gaze slips to Pidge who has also sat up and has her eyes narrowed. But before she could continue Keith notices that Allura is sneaking up behind his friend with the perfectly obvious intent to scare her off. Keith suppresses a smile.

“Are you and Lan–“

“BOO!!”

“AHHHH!”

Keith knows Pidge will now deny until the end of her life this type of scream that left her mouth, but sadly there were witnesses. Witnesses that are currently laughing their asses off at how Allura grabbed Pidge around the shoulders and lifted her a bit from the ground which caused the younger girl to let out a high pitched yell and trash around like a maniac. Keith, Lance, Hunk and Allura possibly woke the whole yard up from how much they were cackling and giggling like idiots at their friend’s expense.

“Very funny Allura! I’m peeing myself. Ha-fucking-ha,” Pidge rumbles and gives Allura the look that promises thousands ways in which she would murder her right now.

Allura circles around the raging ball that Pidge has become and goes over to sit on her bent knees next to Keith.

She’s dressed in a cute yellow shirt that’s tied on the front, exposing a small proportion of her pierced belly. She’s in short ripped white shorts and cute sandals with platforms. There’s a long necklace dangling around her neck and her hair today is in a long afro with her white curls shining like gems under the sun with a black head wrap on the front keeping her bangs away from her forehead. Her smile is so huge that at some point it can rival the sun and perhaps for a millionth time Keith wonders who has trapped Lance in their love for him to break up with _Allura_.

There is a sudden small breeze that gently blows all around them and the smell of Allura’s perfume travels to Keith’s nose. Citrus and something that reminds him of sweets; something fresh. Like lemon cheesecake.

_She’s just like a sunflower_, Keith thinks.

“Sorry I was late guys! But the school council kept us longer than usual and guess for what,” Allura exclaims and leans forward in the circle, her eyes crinkling at the corners.

Allura was the head of the seniors for this year and basically for all the previous ones when she started as a vice president in her class. She has always been strong willed and ambitious; working hard, shooting for the stars and expecting no less. Keith has always admired that about her, because he was the same when it came to goals and maybe that’s why they quickly became friends in freshman year.

“Lotor peed himself!”

“They’re adding Taco Tuesdays again?!”

“We’re a simulation and none of this is real?”

Keith and Allura both make faces at the trio’s stupid assumptions and then look at each other as if these people in front of them are unknown.

“_Anyways_ …” drawls out Allura, but quickly recovers. “Since you guys are bad I’ll just straight up tell you.”

Lance sits up with anticipation and no matter how much Keith doesn’t want to look – traitorously he still does it. Under his lashes he notices how the brunette is glancing at Allura with pure curiosity and tilted head. Before, months and years ago, he could find the romantic gleam; the desire to have Allura by his side … but now Keith finds absolutely nothing. His long leg stretches out and pokes Keith on the thigh, but when the black haired notices Allura’s head jerking down at the motion – Keith moves away like he’s burned.

It still is shameful for him somehow even when his friends have broken up. It sounds ridiculous, but he least of all he wants _Allura_ to know Keith has been in love with Lance all this time.

He was no fool – there was tension here and there at the beginning between Lance and Allura, but that was perfectly understandable after all. He wonders if Allura also knows who is this mysterious person that Lance is madly in love with. Sometimes the craving to just know who it is; to go and just as Lance what they have that he doesn’t is so bad. It’s eating him from the inside like a parasite, but then he remembers how defeated his best friend sounded that night on the phone and he drops it.

“They finally revealed what’s the theme for the Prom!” Allura squeaks out and everyone, except for Keith and Pidge, squeal and shout with excitement. “And since I’m in the council – you, my dear friends will be the first to know! But don’t tell anyone before it’s official!”

Allura warns with a raised finger, but Keith still catches the devilishness in her eyes. Keith eyes his friends. Hunk has his usual big smile, his eyes behind the sunglasses probably shining and Keith has no doubt that Shay is already invited. She’s a freshman at Balmera University and Keith knows how much her boyfriend misses her so that’s definitely the perfect opportunity for the couple.

Pidge, despite the fact she’s not as excited, still looks interested enough. Maybe for Matt so she can know from far ahead how to embarrass him.

Lance is leaning forward too, with his toothy smile and dimples. He’s obviously excited for the announcement and Keith feels himself smiling too for his friend’s smile is so contagious that he can’t help himself when it comes to Lance being ecstatic over such a simple thing as the Prom being themed like every other year.

“C’mon ‘Lura, don’t keep us holding what is it?” Hunk demands.

“Okay so …” she sits up straighter. “Remember how last year it was Disco Era aka seventies-eighties? Where Shay went with this shiny jumpsuit and I did her hair?”

“Yes, sadly Keith couldn’t go there and be in touch with his type of people,” adds Lance and snickers when said boy shoots him a death stare. “With his mullet and fingerless gloves – _perfect_ for his time!”

When they all laugh and nod in confirmation Allura smiles even more sneakily than before. “Well this time the theme will be really retro. Go back with two decades and _tadaa_! You have it!”

They all _woah_ and look around each other in surprise at that.

So a 50s themed Prom, huh? That’s as retro as it gets if Keith is being honest. Keith honestly knows all the horrible things from that time and never gave any thought on the fashion, the music and the technology. It’d be nice for everyone to dress up and dance to some super old songs, he guesses and Keith is surely going, but he definitely wouldn’t stay there the whole night. Usually when the Prom has a theme – most people buy two outfits. Some don’t bother and choose just one, but Keith has the feeling his friends will one hundred percent go for the former options. Which again brings him to the point he doesn’t have anything at all. He hopes Shiro will help him out with this one.

“No way! That’d be so cool!” Shouts Hunk and everyone nods.

“Dude I’ll find the sickest outfit ever and be a Prom King I’m telling you!” Lance exclaims and he and Hunk start throwing out ideas of how they’ll dress, how they’ll style their hair.

“I will so put the whole gel tube in Matt’s hair,” snickers Pidge as if the Devil has possessed her body and is speaking instead of her. Her brother’s hair has been growing much longer lately that he even puts it in a ponytail now to the point where Keith is just tiny jealous of how quick it has grown.

“I have to start looking for a dress,” adds Allura, tapping her chain in thought. “I already have one for the restaurant we’re going at afterwards, but I surely gotta dig in to find something good now.”

Keith looks all around his friends and even when he’s not that invested into the matter, it still feels good to be around them and enjoy their company. Lately the anxiety over not getting a call from Altea has been holding him a tight chokehold and the accepting letter from Naxzela feels as if it’s watching him, judging him from afar from his desk. He knows it’s realistically, logical that they haven’t called him yet. After all, the maximum waiting was one month and only a week has passed, but Keith has never had the reputation of being patient.

Keith has always known that the fear of leaving his friends and Lance behind is scarier than not getting accepted into his dream university anyways.

“But remember guys, for now this is a complete secre-“ Allura begins seriously, alas …

“YO GUYS! THE FIFTIES-SIXTIES ARE THIS YEAR’S PROM THEME! I KNOW ‘CUZ JOSH JUST TEXTED ME! I’LL BE FUCKING ELVIS PRESLEY Y’ALL!”

Everyone from the yard start clapping and cheering, whooping like someone announced they’ve won the World Cup for something. All of these loud sounds seem to silence Allura’s frustrated groan. But soon they all start laughing at the craziness of it and that it has Keith’s belly aching.

Allura leans on his shoulder while chuckling and they both fall down on Lance’s childhood blanket. This time Keith doesn’t move away when Lance unconsciously touches him.

“I love this goddamn yard so much,” Keith mutters at the end, where the hype has already died and now they all stare up at the pretty green leaves and the tiny gaps from where the sun is shining through.

The silence from everyone is enough of a sign they all agree.

{ * }

Akira Kogane has never thought about his prom.

Sure, he knows that this sounded as a huge exaggeration, and yet it was nothing but the truth. Pessimistically enough in the past he didn’t even think he’d be living well enough to study in an actual good high school – let alone survive there enough until his graduation to have his prom. He may have had daydreams about going on one with some cute boy, but said daydreams were never necessarily included the end of his high school life as the perfect destination.

His brother started talking about his prom the moment Keith took a step in Voltron High and while it was incredibly annoying to get reminded of how older he was getting with each year it was still endearing to witness Shiro fussing over him in a way Keith would expect from a parent no less.

But sometimes these … dark thoughts crawled up in his mind when he least wanted them. Thoughts about Shiro and Adam and their wasted opportunity of adopting; having an actual kid they were supposed to raise as a couple when they were ready to do so. Instead the government dumped on both of them an orphan with anger, abandonment and trust issues all in one, whom had trouble with loving and receiving love back. Keith has always feared he was never enough in their eyes and in their hearts that gave so much love to him in hard times.

What if he had be the reason to ruin all of their chances to adopt a kid or two? What if they never afforded to take another lonely kid in that needed love just like him of fear of upsetting young Keith? It made Keith sick to his stomach whenever he thought about it. Of course he knew they love him just as much as he loves them, but the anxiety over this has always been slowly killing him, pushing him over the edge.

He had tried to ask them about it. To ask if they never adopted a kid, because of him; if he has changed their lives for the worse at the beginning; if he even had a small proportion to be blamed for. Unfortunately Keith knows that all those questions would end in a nasty fight, promises that he shouldn’t worry about anything and assurances that they love him and wouldn’t change anything.

So maybe it was a bit comforting, watching Shiro fuss over him and his outfit for the night just like Keith would expect from a father. It is rather amusing too.

His brother is currently running around the house, muttering under his nose about everything that needs to be done from Keith’s outfit to his hair and accessories. There are pins in his mouth and a hairspray in his hand as he’s searching for the hairbrush that Keith is watching Adam toy with sneakily next to him.

“When do you think he’ll notice?” Asks Adam and Keith snorts against his hand, careful not to lean too much back on his chair, because of his hair. Despite the fact that they make fun of Shiro’s clumsiness and aloofness, it really warms Keith’s heart how much effort and love his brother is putting into trying to make him look good tonight.

“I’m not sure. After all, he was the one who handed it to you so I guess we’re just wait,” replies Keith and laughs quietly when he sees Shiro checking for the goddamn hairbrush between the couch cushions.

“Adam, babe, I can’t find it,” he whines and unfortunately Keith and Adam can’t hold it in anymore. They start cackling and when Shiro’s gaze snaps at them he narrows his eyes in accusation when he notices what Adam wiggles at him.

Shiro gets up from the couch angrily and walks towards the pair while tugging the brush away from his husband’s grip. “You two are absolutely impossible.”

Adam crosses his arms with a smile and sighs, but Keith still catches the loving glance he throws at Shiro when he isn’t looking. Keith doesn’t know how his face changes when he looks at Lance, but maybe that’s why Pidge got suspicious of him three weeks ago under the tree. Or that’s why Shiro figured out who has his heart in his hands. His friend never brought up or mentioned it again, and while Keith is thankful for it – he still walks on eggshells whenever Lance and Pidge are around.

The thought of seeing Lance tonight makes his heart drop in his stomach nervously, his hands jittering. No one shared with anyone how they’ll look tonight, but now Keith is mulling over if he should’ve asked, because no matter what Lance is wearing tonight it will surely make his lungs explode.

“Is the ponytail too tight?” Shiro questions and very gently uses the comb in his other hand to smother the small bump on top of his head for a millionth time tonight. Surprisingly Keith really liked the hairdo and finds it actually cute.

Keith shakes his head in refusal and watches how Shiro’s smile breaks out on his face. His brother has his significant eyeliner on, because according to his words he and Adam will go to enjoy a nice evening out while Keith celebrates with his friends. The plan so far has been to go to school for the prom, take a few pictures with everyone then they will all go to attend their reservations at this one expensive restaurant. Allura proposed for them to go to a bar afterwards, but something told Keith that he’d be too tired for that.

“Okay let me get your tuxedo now!” Adam declares excitingly and runs off to the bedroom to retrieve the outfit they all chose and bought weeks ago.

“You guys are more excited than me for this,” says Keith and smiles at Adam who has Kosmo running after him with his tail jumping side to side while going up the stairs. When they went shopping for an outfit it was like Keith was alone with two children jumping around into every possible store as if it was a candy shop.

Shiro says nothing back and frankly Keith doesn’t know if he wants him too, but soon Adam comes back with his tuxedo on a hanger. Keith is currently only with a long black T-shirt on and his boxers underneath, because according to his brother – the outfit should be left for the end. And since his hair is ready, Keith gets up carefully from his chair and makes a move to grab the clothes from Adam.

“Be careful with it!” Adam warns and Keith rolls his eyes with a scoff.

His fingers brush lightly over the material and he gulps nervously while he looks back at Shiro and Adam. They look expectantly at him, but when he gives them a pointed look – realization floods on their faces and they turn around to give him some privacy. Keith then begins to take off his black shirt and he doesn’t know why, but his heart beats wildly in his chest at the tuxedo in front of him. He’d never imagine himself to be so nervous over this, but here he is.

After a few minutes and very skillful dodges not to ruin his hair – Keith is all dressed up, with only his black bowtie in his hand. He clears his throat to announce that he’s ready and when Shiro turns around, Keith almost chokes with whatever bulge he has in his throat.

His brother’s dark grey eyes shine under the lamps with unshed tears and all the love, pride and affection is collected there. All of his insecurities wash away just by this look alone and Keith wonders how he’s ever thought that Shiro isn’t the best thing that’s happened to him; the best person he could’ve ever come across that loved him so unconditionally and fiercely. Not once gave up on him or made him think he was lesser. He was always going to be just Keith to Shiro. Not a broken boy with issues, but just Keith. His second cousin turned into baby brother in his eyes in just matter of months that he saved when Keith needed it the most.

There’s a slight burning behind Keith’s lids, but this time he doesn’t pretend it isn’t there.

“Oh Akira … you look amazing,” Shiro breathes out and takes a few steps around him just so he can wrap his big arms around Keith’s body. Keith is there at the end to respond to the hug in a negative time as he buries his head in Shiro’s shoulder like he always does whenever they embrace each other. “I wish you could see yourself in the same way I saw you growing up. I’m so incredibly proud of you.”

They depart and with great carefulness, Shiro pulls out something out of his pocket. Then he reaches out and puts a deep red handkerchief in Keith’s breast pocket with a sneaky smile.

“It was my father’s,” Shiro explains and Keith nods in an understanding, putting a hand on it to just simply feel the fabric. It’s smooth and fluffy and it makes Keith think Shiro cleaned it thoroughly before he gave it to him. Adam circles around Shiro so he can take the black bowtie from Keith’s hands and weave it around Keith’s neck. He steps back to admire the view that is polished and fancy Keith, ready for his prom.

Adam puts his head on Shiro’s shoulder, his husband’s hand sneaking to settle on his waist. “There. Now you’re all perfect.”

Then the older man points with his head towards the mirror like to say _‘Go ahead. Look.’_

With hesitant steps Keith walks towards the big full body mirror next to their door. The moment he sees himself he can’t even manage to not gasp at what he witnesses, eyes travelling up and down like he can’t believe that this is Keith Kogane in front of him.

The white shirt and dinner jacket fit him like a glove, hugging his body in all the right places. The red tissue and bowtie contrasted on the white like a sore thumb, but it still looked _good_. End of said jacket travelled a bit lower than usual, resting on his thighs, but Shiro assured him that this is how it was modern back in the fifties. His trousers are black along with his shoes and surprisingly it all goes so well with his hairstyle – high ponytail and a small bump on purpose on the top. He isn’t used to letting his whole face out on display like that, unless it’s really hot, however he can’t say he minds it too much.

He moves from side to side, left to right and a little private smile tugs his lips. He looks good and he feels good. Nothing will ruin his night and he’ll make sure of it.

“Me and Adam will prepare for tonight and we’ll be ready to take you in ten! Alr–“

Shiro doesn’t have enough time to finish whatever he had to say before the bell rings. They all furrow their eyebrows as they all know no one is expecting anyone to come. Adam scowls even more and in a confident way, he approaches the door in what Keith can call ‘the military march’. Even if Shiro is bigger, taller and more muscular – the two of them have always turned to Adam when it comes to stuff like that since he’s the one who knows more about strangers at doors, the possibility of them being dangerous. Though this is a safe neighborhood, it still doesn’t mean they should let their guard down.

But then Adam’s whole face completely changes and from a calculated frown it turns into a toothy smile as he turns to Keith, pointing at the door. “I think this one is for you.”

He moves away from the door, sly evident on his face and Keith follows his figure while Adam grabs a confused Shiro by the arm to take him away to their bedroom. Leaving Keith alone to answer the door. To answer Lance. Because no one else would bother to come here before the prom or make Adam smile like that.

So Keith squares up his shoulders, takes a deep breath and goes onward to open the door, his heart already hammering against his ribs like it’s a prisoner trying to escape.

Cautiously, slowly he opens the door, nervousness sitting down on his chest at the thought of Lance not liking how he looks. Although that’s one of the dumbest thoughts Keith has had he still feels self-conscious about his appearance despite the fact he was checking himself out in front of the mirror just seconds ago.

And Keith … ?

Keith has seen Lance in lots of things. Lots of outfits – from his pajamas with car stamps, in swim trucks, in boxers and sweatpants with hoodies – to jeans and ironed shirts with ties. Even his ridiculous banana costume from sophomore year on Halloween. He has seen Lance in almost everything. But that’s where Keith is wrong and proven otherwise, because the view of Lance dressed like _that_ is nothing he has seen before nor has _dreamt_ to see.

Lance looks like the typical _‘bad boy’_ that would star in the newest rebellious movie made in the fifties. His black jeans are cuffed at the end just a bit at the ankles with a white T-Shirt tucked in his pants and of course, a leather jacket that hasn’t been zipped, revealing a silver chain hanging from his neck. Lance’s hair is obviously slicked back with a gel, but it still has lots of volume on the front as it’s obviously in a hairdo Keith can say it’s a pompadour. Lance looks absolutely gorgeous and Keith wants to tell him that hundreds of times; thousands of times until his best friends gets that he’s the most beautiful boy Keith has seen.

“Hey,” Keith greets.

Lance doesn’t answer and Keith notices how those blue eyes roam across his own body, taking in Keith’s outfit and heat immediately starts to be present on his cheeks. There isn’t any reason for Lance to be here, early before the prom starts, but Keith can’t say he minds. With his tall build Lance shields the setting sun from Keith, but the orange glow that envelops him is too blindingly exquisite.

Instead of giving a proper answer Lance steps closer and the memory of three weeks ago flashes behind his lids like an old photo. Lance came here to be comforted; sought out ease from Keith. They almost kissed so many times that same night and the sheer want to kiss Lance is filling Keith so fast to the point where he feels like he can’t take it anymore.

“Um– I uh- …” Lance starts unsurely and Keith sees his eyes flying away from his. Lance is so uptight and all the black haired wants to do is to just touch. Touch and take all bad things away. “I know you didn’t expect me here, but … I have something to ask you.”

Lance’s gaze still doesn’t settle on him. He licks his lips and shuffles on his legs. It has Keith frowning in a worry as he notices that Lance rarely behaves like that unless it’s something important. He makes a risky decision and grabs gently Lance’s cheeks with his hands, forcing the taller boy to make eye contact with him. The smooth skin under his palm burns.

“What is it?”

Lance gulps, closes his eyes and finally blurts the words he’s been holding. “I know it sounds crazy and that uhm– you probably wouldn’t want to. However I just had to do it, because I can’t take it anymore. Keith, will you maybe … give me the honor to be the date for my prom?”

Keith likes to think he’s a pretty assured person. He knows what he likes and dislikes, what he wants from life. He knows that he loves his dog, family and friends. He loves art and walks in the park, eating sushi and spending time with the important people in his life. He loves Lance and he’s certain that this is the love of his life; no other could even come close to what that boy means to him. He also hates people chewing and speaking with their mouths open along with pushy ex boyfriends.

But despite that – the shock that overtakes Keith in that moment when Lance asks such a simple question is the opposite of him feeling self-assured. He perfectly freezes as if on purpose while his eyes widen at what comes out of Lance’s mouth.

He stares. And stares.

And continues to stare.

The pulse of his heart is like a loud drum in his ears, in his neck and wrists, in his throat. It makes him unsteady on his feet, the ground suddenly shaking beneath him but he still keeps his expanded eyes on Lance’s face who looks like he wants to be buried seven feet under.

“Wait … what?” Keith’s voice is so hushed, so quiet even when no soul is around them. But Keith feels like it has to be quiet. It _must_ be quiet, because if he doesn’t hear what Lance says afterwards his heart might not handle the outcome. Won’t handle it at all, if this turns out to be some kind of joke or a stupid dream.

Lance doesn’t waste any time.

“You – Keith. Me – Lance. On the prom. Together.”

It earns Lance another confused stare.

“But w-why? Why me?” Keith asks while spluttering like an idiot. “I thought you’d take someone else last minute! I-I- Lance, _everyone_ in this school would love to go with you! Don’t go all pitiful on me just because _I_ don’t have a date, you know how much I despise it when people treat me like some charity case-“

Keith starts fighting for a breath with every letter that runs out of him, hyperventilation squeezing his lungs in a tight clamp, not letting him go. It makes little sense to Keith, for Lance to want such thing as _Keith_ with him to the prom. Where everyone can see that Lance is with a boy. Is he using Keith as a way just to come out for everyone in school? Although that makes little to no sense, considering how private about his life his best friend it is.

His thoughts can’t continue; they can’t even reach the _middle_ when with sudden speed Lance grabs _Keith’s face _instead and a pair of the softest lips Keith has ever kissed press into his.

Just like that … all the thoughts flee away from his head. Leaving it empty, except for Lance.

_Lance, Lance and Lance. _

That is all that seems to fill his head now – just thoughts of Lance hands on him, Lance’s lips on him, the complete and utter feeling of _just_ being in his arms.

He feels Lance’s uncertainty as he barely moves his lips, like he’s scared Keith will pull away or won’t respond. It is gentle and delicate making Keith’s heart leap again into his throat, electricity buzzing on his skin from the place where Lance has touched him. But then … shyly with just a hint of dubiousness and determination Keith responds to the kiss.

At first it feels like they do it for the first time. Which is ridiculous, considering how many times they’ve kissed before, but there is something different that has Keith whole body shaking. In what, he doesn’t know yet and he doesn’t care, because soon while that kiss can even be called one – brings something between them And it lingers. Not too soon their muscles seem to click into all the reminiscences that they’ve made months ago.

It only gets more and more passionate from there and Keith can’t help, but remember their first time being like this. Kissing just as gentle but also just as fiery. Something in his chest melts at the hotness of the kiss while he drinks every gasp, every whine from Lance’s lips. He’s missed those sounds so much and he presses closer to Lance’s body as if he can hear them better.

They depart soon and the kiss was too short for Keith’s liking, but he may be biased for he hasn’t tasted Lance in so long. Didn’t even think he’d do it properly again.

“Don’t you get it, Keith?” Lance rasps out and his nose presses next to his in a gentle nudge. “I don’t want everyone. I want _you_. I’ve always did.”

Keith shudders. “But what about that person that you broke up with Allura for?”

He can’t help himself. He _has_ to know.

He looks up at Lance, unanswered questions running thousands of miles per hour in his mind. But Lance only shakes his head with a smile and goes to graze Keith’s ear with his teeth. Only so he can whisper, “You’re that person, Keith. Everything I did all these months, is because I’ve been devastatingly in love with you this whole time.”

And Keith craves for himself to say the same. To say that all these years Keith has been drawn to Lance like the Earth to the Sun. Orbiting around Lance, hopelessly watching from too close, pinning and wishing Lance looked at him the same way he’s looked at Plaxum and Allura. That he agreed to the kissing arrangement only so he could know what it would feel like to kiss Lance before he graduates. That he went to Luna, because of Lance; that he broke up with James, _because_ of Lance.

Yet, he can’t seem to form into simple sentences how much love he feels for him. He can’t begin to explain how this all feels so surreal that Lance kissed _him_ and told him he loved _Keith_. Has been in love all this time as Keith has been too stupid, too blind to see what was in front of him the whole time.

So Keith surges forward, perhaps not as gracefully as the first time and captures Lance’s lips in a burning kiss again, hands weaving around the taller boy’s neck.

Words were never his strong suit anyways.

{ * }

“And this is the reason why I never went to _my_ prom.”

Keith bursts out in laughter, shoulders shaking with amusement as he shuts his eyes in a bliss. Michelle has always been an interesting person with such a way of telling engaging stories that Keith couldn’t help but envy at the ability. It is a powerful skill that not many people have, but Keith is strangely surrounded by these type of people anyways.

And his boyfriend is one of them.

_God_, just the thought of calling Lance his boyfriend has Keith’s stomach turning upside down while his lips subconsciously twitch with the desire to smile. It has been one week and three days since Prom night where Lance came on his porch unannounced and confessed his love for him. That night was maybe even the best one in his life filled with so many positive emotions that at some point Keith thought it never actually happened.

Speaking of said boyfriend – he is currently having his head on Keith’s lap laughing just as loud at Michelle’s story. He’s holding Keith’s hand shyly in his while Keith plays with his brown locks with his other hand. He softly smiles down at him and smears his thumb on Lance’s palm, his heart already bleeding out too much love than he can handle.

“Wow so you really punched your prom date, because he said something homophobic, huh?” Lance asks through his laughter and Keith almost gets lost in his eyes as they shine like diamonds in the morning light. Since his boyfriend admitted that he met Michelle (and also expressed his annoyance over Keith not introducing them), Lance insisted they walk Kosmo together for his morning walk so he can meet up with her and Molly again.

The woman obviously asked about their prom and not surprisingly it went to topic of how Michelle herself spent her own in the far 2007.

Keith hears himself asking, “Didn’t he know you’re also one of those “evil gays”?

He uses the same words that angered Michelle to no end on her prom to the point where she punched her date.

“Please,” she scoffs. “I didn’t even know him, my mother forced me to go with him because she and his mom were friends. According to her no girl wanted to go with him.”

“Gee, I wonder why,” sighs Lance sarcastically and they all laugh again, Kosmo and Molly barking and running in front of them. Keith whistles warningly at his dog when he gets too close to a baby, stumbling on their feet in the grass. Kosmo is the gentlest dog, especially when it comes to children, but sadly not many parents knew that and got scared when he gets too close.

Keith brings his gaze down on Lance who is already watching him back, lovesick expression that makes Keith feel once again stupid for not noticing all these signs his boyfriend had been throwing at him this whole time. He feels his face twisting into a smile and watches how Lance blinks at him, ecstatic at what he’s seeing. Maybe he isn’t the only one who needs some time to believe this is, in fact, real. True. He and Lance really are a couple. Together.

Cautiously he grabs Lance’s hand more firmly, seizing it better as he takes it higher – only to press a feathery kiss there. He hears Lance’s breath hitching at the motion and a smirk appears on his lips, satisfied that he has the same effect on Lance just like Lance has on him. Then Lance gets up a bit to shorten the distance between them. Keith automatically leans down, Michelle’s chattering in the background making him feel bad for not listening but …

Their lips _just_ touch, oh so faintly, but they get cut off as a phone rings out of nowhere. Keith snaps his head towards the noise, recognizing that this is his ringtone. He hears Lance sighing out of disappointment and Keith pecks him on the cheek as a redemption before he reaches out to pick the device from his back pocket.

He looks at the screen and furrows his eyebrows.

“Who is it?” Lance asks, concern laced in his tone, but Keith doesn’t look at him.

“It’s an unknown number,” Keith replies and he doesn’t waste any more to mull over who could it possibly be as he presses the green button, answering the call.

He puts the phone next to his ear and glances at Lance confused.

“Hello?” His voice is shaky and he doesn’t know why.

“Good afternoon! Am I speaking to Akira Kogane?” The voice on the other end is feminine, bubbly and energetic like the person is about to tell him the most amazing thing in the world.

“Uhh y-yeah? Who is this?”

“My name is Anita Larson and I’m head secretary of Altea University!” She exclaims and Keith’s heart gives a loud thump in his chest while his eyes widen at that. Lance’s face becomes even more concerned. “Two days ago we sent you an email that you haven’t returned yet and our policy states we must call you after forty eight hours if there’s no response.”

_Shit._

What was he doing two days ago that was so important he didn’t bother to check his _goddamn_ email?

“Oh, I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to,” apologizes Keith, heart skyrocketing even more at her words. If he failed something with not returning this email he might as well just die in Lance’s arms out of too much anger and embarrassment.

“Ah, it’s no problem it happens all the time! In fact ninety percent of the time we have to call since no one checks their emails that frequently,” Anita laughs and Keith returns it, faker and nervously. She sure has a knack for comforting. “I’m calling here to announce that you Mr. Kogane have been accepted into Altea University! Congratulations!”

And it’s like the ground (or the bench he’s sitting on) crumbles into nothingness beneath him. So many feelings pass through him, so many available reactions to this, but all Keith can do is just sit there with his mouth open.

“W-what? Seriously?!” He chokes out and laughs like a crazy between the sentences. He quite can’t believe this! All this hard work he had put into his drawings, all the blood, sweat and tears, the heartbreak has come to this very moment where it all pays off. He wants to jump, yell, swim, dance, do all these crazy things.

“One hundred percent young man! All of the information is in the email we’ve sent you and if there are any questions, free to call us anytime!”

“I-I will! Thank you so much!”

Tears gather in his eyes, but he doesn’t let himself cry until the call ends. He is _not_ going to get emotional on this woman that he doesn’t know.

Her only response is a light laugh. “Have a nice evening, Mr. Kogane.”

She hangs up before he can return the words, but he doesn’t care. Lance sat up next to him in the middle of the conversation, but his face is not worried anymore – just curious. He turns with gleaming eyes to Lance and _stars_, he will never get enough of this boy. He was so caught up in this his new relationship with the person of his dreams that he completely forgot he submitted into Altea.

And because Keith is hungry, _starving_ for Lance’s kisses that give him life every time – he reaches up and does exactly what he wanted to do earlier before they got interrupted.

Lance, despite still being puzzled over what happened, kisses back. It’s so different now, when they kiss because they love each other and they know it. Before it was only an excuse, supposed to be only full of lust and sexual desire. But now they vary in so many different ways. Now the kisses are sleepy, smiley, comforting or just simple pecks without tongue. It makes Keith breathe freely as if his lungs have widened and help him take in everything so much easier.

Lance moves eagerly against him. It makes Keith tingle.

He breaks it off and stumbles over his words as he tries to explain to Lance what happened. “Lance … Altea called and the woman said I was accepted! Lance _oh my god_–“

He gets interrupted by Lance’s lips again and soon he feels Lance’s thumbs brushing the happy tears away from his cheeks. He didn’t even realize that he’d been crying, but here he is – melting, heart on fire at this simple, adoring movement.

Lance separates them, but not much only so he can murmur against Keith’s grin.

“I knew you could do it. Not once I doubted that.” Keith sniffs at that and kisses Lance’s freckled cheek.

“Yeah?”

“Of course. I wouldn’t handle going to my dream university without the boy of my dreams,” says Lance and Keith’s blush gets hotter with every word.

“I love you. So much,” says Keith and goes in for a kiss again.

“AWWW, I love you too Keith!” Michelle suddenly shouts and the black haired bursts out in laughter again with his boyfriend. So many time he had been sitting on this bench, sad and tired in this park, dreaming for a life where Lance loved him back, where he got everything he’s wanted from life.

Once Luna had said _‘How can you feel happiness truly if you don’t feel sad from to time?’_

And if this is the sadness and the heartbreak Keith had to go through, only to be here in this moment and experience this sort of true happiness – he’d do it again.

He looks up and catches Lance’s broad smile.

_And again._

4 years later – December 2059

Winters in Alaska are definitely something, Lance thinks.

Something magical. Since he had been living in a lot of warm places his whole life – his experience with cold weather and snow wasn’t really much. First Cuba, then Florida and now he’s been living for four years in California. It’d been a bit better since Florida is way hotter and humid, but it was still a huge difference when this year Keith proposed to him to visit his _uncle_ Kolivan Galra aka one of the most famous basketball players in the last two decades in Alaska.

For three years straight for every break, every holiday they’ve been going back to Florida for their families. Luna was always ready to greet them at the door with open arms and amazing food, but this year Keith offered they’d go somewhere else for Christmas. Sure, his mom was upset they wouldn’t see each other, but he promised her they’d visit on the weekends.

Not to mention that apparently all kinds of basketball legends were Kolivan’s guests so Lance was going to be surrounded by all of his idols. He wasn’t sure if his heart was going to handle it so he tried to keep cool during the plane ride. However, Keith knew him the best and unfortunately knew that Lance is totally freaking out on the inside.

“Are you nervous about tomorrow?”

Keith’s question is teasing, but still careful as he swings their hands back and forth while walking. Lance tries to fight his grin at how adorable it is and turns his eyes back on the road.

Since they’ve arrived way earlier than they thought, the couple decided to spend the whole day at Juneau and look around at the city’s holiday decorations, before they had to hop in the car again so they can drive to Anchorage for the dinner.

And holy shit was it _beautiful_.

The big houses were drowning in Christmas lights along with every store and every shop stand. There wasn’t a miserable person on sight as apparently all the people enjoyed the night walk and the had the jolly spirit in them. Lance has always wished to spend a Christmas like those in the movies – blankets of white snow, covering everything, comfortable knitted sweaters, scarves and beanies, lit up trees all around with hearable cheerful songs from every corner.

Not to mention that the most gorgeous man that Lance had ever seen is holding his hand and pointing out all the kinds of amazing things. His silky black hair was braided by Lance himself this morning and it was way longer than the horrible, but endearing mullet from years ago, as it was thrown over his shoulder. Black tight jeans and boots and long black coat revealed this super fluffy white turtleneck sweater that Keith bought for his trip to here.

He’s mesmerizing and after so many years Lance still can’t believe Keith is _his_. 

In the beginning of their relationship, due to Lance’s inexperience and awkwardness Keith was being a lot more cautious than before. There were some minor fights, some bigger ones, but the burning flame of their love for each other never went out. In fact, it has definitely become bigger than before.

“Of course I’m not,” finally answers Lance as he puffs out, fake cockiness on his lips. “In fact I’m the perfect example of calmness. My chi is in perfect harmony with everything around me.”

Keith chuckles at that and Lance’s heart chest warms itself. The colorful Christmas lights illuminate his boyfriend’s face in a lovely glow and Lance tightens his hand in his pocket. The snow is crunchy and shiny under their feet and Lance almost asks if they should make snow angels.

“Babe you don’t have a single reason to be nervous about this. All of these dudes and ladies there are just bunch of big, tall teddy bears,” says Keith and nudges Lance’s shoulder with his playfully. “Except for maybe uncle Kolivan.”

“Great,” groans out Lance at the sky and lavishes at his boyfriend’s laugh once again. Keith, Shiro and Adam have mentioned that the man is just as rock faced as he is on TV. Also that he’s awfully protective of Keith that he met when he was eleven or so, so if getting Shiro’s approval as the big macho brother with muscles – then Kolivan Galra is thrice as bad.

Lance probably has to fight a dragon or some shit to even get the man to like him.

“Oh c’mon he’ll love you. You’re charming and you play basketball so you guys already have a topic to talk about,” comforts Keith and kisses Lance on the neck while he shivers. Damn Keith and his knowledge of his spots. “Plus he’ll see how much I love you.”

“Mmm are you calling me the most amazing man?” Lance turns his head so he can try to get a kiss from Keith who only sends him a grin, screaming of mischief.

“I don’t remember saying that, but if it’ll boost you ego so you can stop being nervous ...” the black haired trails off and brings his face closer to Lance. Unconsciously they’ve stopped, but not in the middle of the way to be a bother next to some kind of shop for mugs.

“The most incredible? The sexiest? So handsome that you’ll forget about that new actor who you’re fawning over with my mom?”

Keith is so close now and Lance is smelling his perfume that smells of lily of the valley and vanilla. He inhales subtly and circles his long arms around his boyfriend’s waist who pulls him closer as he tugs Lance’s blue scarf. Keith’s eyes have never shined so brightly under these lights and Lance swallows.

“Don’t push it,” mutters Keith with a smirk and in the next moment they’re kissing.

Before, all Lance could hear in his ears whenever he kissed Keith was the heartbeat in his ears. His palms were getting sweaty every time, his hands and legs shaking, threatening to make him fall. His whole body became a jelly each time Keith got closer to him and the brunette had always feared that this was his destiny and punishment as a man in love.

But it passed.

Now all Lance feels is his heart speeding up, but with a content settle. Like it’s speeding up only so it can match Keith’s heartbeat. The fire in his chest is no more deadly hot, but a comforting warmth exactly like a burning fireplace on a cold Christmas night. Although he’s still a putty in Keith’s hands. His lips are a bit chapped because of the winter wind, but nevertheless soft and moving impatiently against his. Keith settles his cold palms on Lance’s red cheeks and when he lets out a quiet moan Lance shivers, tightening his arms around his boyfriend.

Perhaps it was from the cold or the sounds Keith was making. Perhaps were both.

Keith tasted sweetly, like the chocolate pancake and mint tea from earlier. Lance leans into the kiss more, tracing with his tongue the shape of Keith’s mouth.

At last they draw apart from each other, but only their lips. Their bodies are still too close, lovers embracing in the shiny night under the big pine tree. Lance pushes his bangs, kisses Keith’s forehead and those words … _those fucking words_ almost slip out of his mouth, but he reminds himself to wait. To wait until he grips on to the perfect moment.

Then he’ll breathe them out against Keith’s mouth and it’ll be flawless.

Keith kisses him once again on the lips, but pulls too fast with Lance chasing after him. He caresses Lance’s chest and caringly twists the scarf around his neck. Then he kisses Lance again like he can’t help himself and the brunette hums gratified.

“C’mon Loverboy, we have ice skating to do.”

Then Keith grabs his hand again and tugs him from their place, moving them away from the tree and the mug stand.

Lance puts his hand in the deep pocket of his coat once again, seeking comfort from the small velvet box that protects the thing that will make this man forever his.

Soon Keith wasn’t going to be his _boyfriend_ anymore. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My new fic if you beautiful people want to give it a try! It's about forbidden love between the paladins of Voltron. 🪐 [Please Forgive Me, I Can't Stop Loving You](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26294476/chapters/64020244) ✨
> 
> So ... we've finally come to the end I guess, huh? I honestly never expected this piece to get as much as attention as it did LIKE SERIOUSLY 4000 HITS? WOAH. 
> 
> First of all - an absolute HUGE THANK YOU to all the people who've read my fic, who took a piece of their time read what i had to put out, who gave kudos, bookmarked, commented and subscribed. All of this would not hav been possible nor finished without YOU!! Guys, you will just never understand how much that supports means to me and lifts my spirits and confidence when i write.
> 
> This fanfic is my first real project for a fandom ever and it was such an experience to simply try what it would be like to write. I had a blast every time! For the record - just a few tiny disclaimers. I on purpose left the mystery around Lance's dad so you can guys interpret it however you want. Of course in my head i do know what happened etc etc, but i'm just gonna leave that to you guys <33 If you have some wild theories - I'M HERE ! I do think i rushed the ending a bit and i did have planned more scenes, but ... :/
> 
> Now, the second thing i wanted to do was to apologize. Techically no one ever pushed me or forced me into writing faster or something, but i simply felt guilty over the fact that i took so long with the final chapter. I started my driving lessons in the beginning of August and it was really stressful, however i can assure you that me updating will be frequent now than now. 
> 
> I feel so blessed with readers like you and as a part of this community. You guys are insane. 
> 
> Thank you for everything.


	8. love distance - epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 🌸 🌸 🌸

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi, i am so sleepy and i wrote this in one sitting and it's literal trash, but it's one very fluffy trash so i hope you like it?
> 
> happy first birthday to this story and thank you all so much for over 300 kudos and 6k hits <3 i love u all to the moon and back.

Fifteen years later – 2074

“Good evening, America and welcome to the nightly Californian news with me – Diane Hawkins! Right now I’m outside building where the White Lions’ anniversary gala is being celebrated! Here, after seventeen years, living legend Lance Ramirez has announced that this upcoming season will be his last as an active player. Fans and even rivals of his are deeply saddened by this however, expected reveal, and are looking forward to what the future holds for him as a possible coach for one of the newest rookie teams. The 38-year-old first started his professional career as a center in _‘California Pistols’_ and two years afterwards transitioned into the _White Lions_ as a shooting guard and is best remembered for his time with them. In total, between 2057-2074 he was granted twelve ‘NBA Champion’ awards and currently holds the record for most won MVP (Most Valuable Player) awards along with Rookie of the Year.

Leandro Ramirez made his debut for the Lions in 2059 and soon became the very living heartbeat of his team. His teammates and friends came from all over the world to visit his retirement party.

_‘I’m very sad I won’t be able to watch his spectacular games on the TV anymore, but he deserves the break for sure. I’ve known him since high school and he still is one of the best people I’ve met,’_ said Ryan Kinkade, a teammate of Mr. Ramirez in his active years while he played for the Lions.

_‘I may be a little biased, but he truly is one of the best the basketball world has seen for sure. I really expect him to do well with whatever team he’s willing to train,’_ shared Kolivan Galra whom has been Lance’s mentor for the past ten years.

Takashi Shirogane, another legend in the NBA history, whom we also remind you is Lance Ramirez’s brother-in-law, also revealed his feelings about it on the morning show with Johnny Nelson, _‘Lance never for once in his career stopped being a dedicated player in his right. But I think he’s at this point in his life where his main focus is not basketball anymore. The first place has always been reserved for Keith, Adelita, his mother, siblings and friends along with sport, but I can see that he wants to be even more involved with them now.’_

The Cuban charmer certainly had everyone across the world swooning for his small family, for sure. He married gorgeous high school sweetheart Keith Kogane in 2060 and years later, on their tenth anniversary, they adopted their first daughter – Adelita whom turned four just last week!

_‘Basketball was my whole life for as long as I can remember. But I grew up and changed throughout the years of my career and as of now I want to focus to be the best husband and father I can be. Adelita, Keith and I are all grateful for your support and birthday wishes. We hope we can celebrate more together with all of you in the future’,_ wrote the athlete on his Instagram and Twitter accounts.

Undeniably, however, we’re assured what lies ahead for the Ramirez family will be only good things from now on.

{ * }

The annoying ringing of his alarm made Lance groan through his foamed mouth, full of toothpaste and he rolled his eyes when he remembered how late it was when he went to bed, worried he’ll oversleep for his meeting with Hunk whom was visiting with Pidge in Seattle for the week. He obviously didn’t oversleep. Lance proposed them to stay over in his hotel, but when Hunk stated Pidge’s parents had a nice apartment in Washington and stated they weren’t going to spend crazy amounts of money just so their rooms can be close to Lance’s.

Exiting the big bathroom, with the toothbrush hanging from his lips, Lance went to his phone turning off the alarm, hoping it won’t bug him again. As he did, his wallpaper took over the screen again and it stopped him in his tracks. The picture he had was the one from year ago when he, Keith and Adelita went on a family vacation to Paris. It was a rare time where Lance’s and Keith’s schedules aligned perfectly and let them have some time for themselves together with their daughter. They decided to visit France, because they’d never been there and Hunk and Shay strongly recommended it.

Lance secretly took this masterpiece of a photo at the garden near Notre Dame. It was the beginning of the spring so everything was full of blossomed trees, green bushes, grass and colorful flowers. Keith with Adelita on his hip were walking forward, admiring the nature while Lance tried to take as many pictures as possible. On one of the trees, a flowering cherry one, his daughter wanted to take a whole branch for herself, but alas for her displeasure, Keith refused saying it’d be rude and would hurt the tree. But he let her touch the petals and smell them so Adelita reached out with her tiny brown hand to caress them and giggled when Keith kissed her cheek.

Lance didn’t even realize he’d taken the picture until later when he was deleting the smudged ones. Without a second thought he put it as his wallpaper and even printed it so he could pin it on the fridge back home. When his husband saw it that one morning, he kissed him so hard that Lance was sure he surprised even himself with it.

The sex was more than good that night.

God above, how much he missed them as he gazed at the photo, his heart aching for their presence. It was three weeks since the last time he saw his favorite people, and _no_, the video chats every night didn’t count.

Realizing far too late, that he’d been staring like a dumbass, a drop of saliva and toothpaste dropped on the screen. Lance let out a disgusted noise, emerging from the back of his throat as cleaned it with his thumb and ran towards the bathroom sink, washing his mouth. He shaved his face following with his skin care procedure and for the finale he grinned at the mirror, winking.

Despite the fact he was getting near forty it didn’t strip Lance off his confidence. In fact, the years did him good, dare he said, judging by these bedroom eyes Keith was giving him until this very day. He’d gotten taller, shoulders broader than before, however he kept his hair short as always, unlike his very beautiful husband whose black locks reached almost to his waist.

It was a cosmic joke, something of the sorts he was sure, because the moment he started thinking about the love of his life – his phone rang, and this time the familiar tune was welcomed with open arms. Lance turned off the bathroom lights and basically ran to his unmade bed where he had thrown the device earlier. He had just a second to admire the contact picture of Keith drooling, asleep on his shoulder before he touched the green button, already smiling at the thought of his sleepy husband and his husky, sexy morning voice.

But what greeted him across wasn’t Keith.  
But Lance couldn’t lie though. The sight was equally as good.

“Papi!” Squealed quietly the little girl, dark brown curls acting as a nest on his daughter’s head. “Papi Hi!”

Lance’s smile if it was possible became wider. “Ah, Buenos días, mi princesa! How are yo-“

But before he could finish his question, his daughter put a finger on her lips, big brown eyes screaming of pure mischief and childlike joy while she shushed him loudly.

“Papi,” she whispered and inched closer to the phone as if in this way she’d actually mumble lower in his ear. His heart melted at her antics and adorableness. What he would give right now to reach out and take her in his arms, blowing raspberries in her neck and cheeks so he could hear her laugh. “Papi, you have to be quiet. Daddy is sleeping.”

Lance smiled softly at her thoughtfulness. “That’s too bad. But we can talk together for now, yeah? Let Daddy sleep.”

Adelita giggled and nodded frantically at him, showing off that she was missing her left canine on her lower teeth. Then she laid her head on her fairy yellow pillow, keeping the phone up in her arms. Lance recognized the violet sheets of his and Keith’s bedroom which meant that this night Adelita didn’t sleep in her room, but next to Keith who was probably more than happy to let her snuggle.

Keith admitted that she made his nights less lonely whenever Lance wasn’t home. Of course, it broke his heart a little to hear that statement, but Keith always kissed him and comforted him that it didn’t matter as long as he kept going home and called whenever he could. Which he did anyways, but it was nice to hear that his husband didn’t find him annoying and wanted it just as bad.

“Papi, tia Rachel came yesterday and gave me this doll. Do you wanna see it? Her hair changes to pink when I wet it. And when you put her in the cold box it goes blue!”

Cold box was a translation to freezer. Somehow she couldn’t say the word right still.

“Really? That’s sooo cool!”

“I know right!”

Adelita squealed again, but then she and Lance both heard shuffling and it was downright hilarious how she froze, eyes as big as plates at the thought of Keith waking up. She turned her head towards her father, but calmed down when she saw that Keith went on his sleeping, softly snoring and unaware that his daughter stole his phone.

Lance could see now, on the right bottom of his screen, some of Keith’s black hair that was in a bun and a t-shirt that definitely belonged to Lance if he went by the colors and the ‘Ramirez’ written on the top and how it slipped from Keith’s shoulder, because of the size.

It suddenly became physically painful. He wanted to hug and squeeze Keith, breathe into his hair and wake him up with kisses. Have Adelita kiss him too, following Lance’s example and he knew his husband would act grumpy, but Lance knew more than everyone that this was something Keith has always wanted.

A family just for him.

His younger self would never believe that from dumb teenagers who secretly loved each other, settled for being almost-but-not-really friends with benefits and even dated other people for the sake of moving on before their hearts got broken – they’d go to being happily married husbands with a beautiful daughter and a good, wonderful life.

Adelita, satisfied that her dad wasn’t awake yet and that she had Lance’s full attention, started chattering about her day before and all the details she could remember. How abuela Luna called her to tell her she’s making her favorite for dinner when they visit next week to what she played, with whom she played in kindergarten. Lance was still appalled by how much drama there was between four year olds. Then she started a different story about how she and Keith drew together.

“Daddy said that I can draw everything I want! I drew a shark ‘cuz that’s your favorite animal, right Papi?”

Ah, the famous drawing times sessions Adelita had with Keith.

She spent a lot of respective time with both of her parents – whether it was playing basketball with Papi Lance or creating art with Daddy Keith. Since she was a curious kid, full of energy and with a vibrant imagination it allowed her to be good at both. Most of the time she just showed up unannounced at Keith’s art room in their house when he was working on commissions or art pieces. And because Keith never gave less than his all, he bought her own small canvas with all the needed art materials.

Pastels, watercolor and tempera paints, pencils, brushes. Name it – little Adelita had it all. There wasn’t space anymore from all the art pieces she was providing them with so Keith and Lance decided to buy an album for all of her creations.

And in turn, Lance bought her own basketball in her favorite color (blue), sport gear with the addition of very tiny sneakers that lighted up whenever you thumped on the ground or jumped. When Keith saw Adelita’s shoes by the door, he cried for one good solid minute.

_“Her feet are so tiny, Lance! Look at them! Shit, she’s so small …”_

“Of course, querida! Sharks are amazing, right!”

At that her nose scrunched preciously and she scowled, eyebrows locking together as her face twisted in doubt and suspiciousness. Her resemblance to Keith was astounding whenever Adelita did that.

“I don’t know Papi, they look really scary.”

“No baby they’re not!” He laughed. “They actually don’t like eating humans and are super friendly and cute! Sharks are like sea puppies!”

Adelita gasped and put a hand over mouth, shocked to hear this information.

However with that simple action it caused Keith’s big phone to drop on her face.

Lance winced at that, praying that she doesn’t start crying and is okay, but it was kind of hilarious at the same time so he held his laughter deep inside. He didn’t want to make fun of her, but _fuck, _that funny sound when the phone collided with Adelita’s face and her saying ‘OW’ was way too much.

There was some movement and obvious shuffling, a small gasp before he saw his daughter again.

“Papi are you okay?”

Lance couldn’t handle her sweetness and laughed fondly, heart and soul bursting at the seams from all the love he had for her. She and Keith were really the best thing that have happened in his life and he’d give up all basketball trophies just to be in California, in his own bed right now.

“I’m fine, princesa. Are you? That seemed like it hurt.”

She put a hand on her forehead, but then decided it wasn’t worth speaking about for she started rambling about random topics again. He tried to listen through it all, but it was very hard when she switched the conversation too quickly for him to follow that way. And he thought _he_ was the fast blabber in the family. But then.

“Hey Papi?”

“Yes, baby?”

“I miss you.”

His chest twisted in a knot and he stayed away from the urge to start crying in front of her. Adelita’s small, soft voice was so quiet, so vulnerable that for a second he considered catching the earliest plane to San Francisco so he could fill the that black, hollow and lifeless void in him, that Lance was aware only Keith and Adelita could fill.

But all he could say was, “I know, princesa. I miss you and your Daddy so much. But we’ll see each other soon, okay? I love you.”

“Okay,” she replied quietly. “I love you too Papi.”

All of a sudden a voice called out.

“Adelita? Sweetie, what are you doing with my phone?”

Keith’s sleepy filled his ears and Lance could’ve sworn he melted at the tone. All this unguarded, affectionate love he showed to Adelita and Lance always made him weak in the knees. The desire in him was filling and filling and he was sure it would all spill embarrassingly much when he sees them in one week.

“I called Papi. Do you wanna say hi? Papi say hi to Daddy!”

A pale hand outstretched and took a hold of his phone. Finally he was face to face with the love of his life. So many years, so many fights, so many happy and sad tears, so many kisses and touches and he still choked up whenever Keith looked at him like that. Like he was the only thing in the world; like Lance was the sun in his own universe. He knew that look like the back of his hand purely because he knew he looked like that too.

“Good Morning, Sharpshooter,” muttered Keith and goddamn, Lance shouldn’t get _this_ excited in the morning at the sound of his husband’s morning voice.

“Morning, _mi cielo hermoso_. Did you sleep well?”

“Mmm yes. I missed you, but I had a little devil who kept snagging the blankets keeping me company,” said Keith who began tickling Adelita’s stomach. She started trashing around, laughing and yelling at her daddy to stop. At the end she only snuggled next to Keith and put her head on her father’s chest nosing at his neck. He put a hand on her curls and started untangling all the knots as he kept talking with Lance.

“When are you coming home?”

_Home. What a beautiful word,_ he thought.

“Less than a week, babe. I have a few more papers to finish, two more meeting and one conference. If I’m done earlier you bet your sweet as—uhh, bun that I’ll catch the first plane to you guys.”

“Okay,” replied Keith and then yawned that caused a chain reaction with Adelita who also sneezed after her own yawn. It was such a cute sneeze that Lance had to coo at how adorable it was.

“Salud,” said Lance and grinned at how she cleaned her nose in Keith’s shirt who sighed loudly and tiredly, showing how done he was with her.

“Gracias, Papi,” she mumbled, the sound muffled, and for their surprises she drifted into a sleep again while she buried her head even closer to Keith’s warmth.

“Man, she’s beat, huh?”

Keith huffed a laugh and went down to kiss the top of her head. The domestic view was enough for Lance to combust on the spot, but held himself together when Keith stared at him, beautiful eyes boring right into his soul. The phone resolution, even the best one, could never show the real, raw beauty Keith possessed or the exact shade of his eyes. That frustrated him to no end.

“She saw one of your interviews on the TV, y’know? Before she went to bed, I mean. Made me replay it over and over again,” softly said Keith and his eyes gleamed of love.

His heart cracked.

“Ah babe I feel so shitty right now,” Lance admitted and fell on his back on the bed, wishing it to swallow him whole from this misery.

“I didn’t say it so you could feel shitty, Lance,” said Keith with a stern, but a comforting fond tone. “I said that because I want you to know how much she wishes you were here.” Then Keith’s expression morphed into a sad one.

“I do too.”

“Hang on a little younger, yeah? I love you both.”

“We love you too.”

All sweet responses got stuck on the top of his mouth when he received a notification that Pidge had texted him.

**gremlin**

where r u idiot we been waiting for 10 mins

“Mi amor, I would love to continue this conversation, but I have to go otherwise Pidge will murder me and probably throw my body in a lake where you won’t find it,” dramatized Lance. “Is that what you want? A dead husband?”

“Please don’t make me a widower, Lance,” deadpanned Keith with too much bluntness that was so him. Lance couldn’t help himself this time and laughed when he could see Keith’s mouth curving up in a smile. He couldn’t wait to kiss this man until neither of them couldn’t breathe. He can’t wait to cuddle the shit out of his daughter.

Lance bid his husband goodbye and in response Keith lifted Adelita’s hand and waved with it at him, overwhelming love and adoration washing over Lance.

Ah yes.

It seemed he was absolutely catching that plane after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One year has passed since i published this story for the first time & I've said so many things regarding it. How much it means to me and how much it has changed me and my writing so there are literally no words in me anymore (or a dictionary) to express my adoration for all of you, the readers. But once again - i love you and i thank you for everything. I hope u liked Adelita even if she wasn't planned at all (PUN INTENDED) and how the life for these boys has turned out after 15 years. 
> 
> And because i can't contain my excitement here's a sneak peek for my new upcoming story :
> 
> “Lance McClain?”
> 
> Allura’s knees could’ve buckled in relief when this time the man reacted to his name. _Birth name_ she was sure. His hand that was holding the bracelet twitched and the tingles of it bounced on the walls. Then his head, very subtly turned towards her voice. She couldn’t miss it mostly because Allura watched him like a hawk the whole time.
> 
> The princess didn’t miss a beat.
> 
> “You probably haven’t heard your name in such a long time.”
> 
> She could see the slight jump in his jaw so she didn’t think about stopping. She was finally getting somewhere. “Lance, I’ve come here to help you, please believe me. Don’t shut me out – talk to me.”
> 
> She slowly started walking towards his bed. “Ten years. You’ve been here for so long and no one could’ve protected you,” and she caught the small motion of him tightening the blanket around his shoulders. “Today the Ancients give you that opportunity.”


End file.
